Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 835. page
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ITT: We share our most autistic and haunting fuck ups.
>be me
>first week at uni so trying to break out of my autistic cage
>be at house party with people I barely know
>didn't know I was supposed to bring my own drinks
>kind of just standing around like a faggot
>eventually someone comes over and is like "anon just head to the kitchen and help yourself" then says some shit about them heading out to the club soon
>go to kitchen, no alcohol around, atleast not that I can see
>didn't want to appear rude by coming back with nothing
>look in cupboard, find pot of cocoa powder
>figure it's better than nothing, pour some out into a cup and grab a spoon
>head back to main room eating fucking powdered cocoa powder
>spilling it everywhere because as I breathe it gets blown around
>everyone looking at me like I'm a fucking clown
>a few people across the room burst out laughing (though they were trying to find it)
>realise my mistake but have to play it cool now
>mouth is getting really dry now but I just keep eating it
>begin to cough, quite a lot of it goes on the floor
>everyone looking at me
>begin crying and just walk out with my cup and spoon
>don't get invited back by anyone and spend the next 2 years alone
>be at the shops
>downsy girl walks by
>immediately yell, "Where my chromosomes at?"
>mfw I made her cry
>mfw I'm kicked out for harassing customers
>>29655386
That's terrible anon.
.
>>29655262
Jesus christ anon, usually I'd say most people are overacting when they have to "cut all contact" with people after fucking up, but I think it's appropriate in your case.
Unless you have a particular personally that's real fucking autistic.
>tfw got 2 grams of very pure cocaine lying safely in my drawer
Who else going out tomorrow?
>>29655183
What's it like?
Original comment fag
>>29655434
Imagine feeling like a chad x200
euforic etc
>>29655434
It feels good, you feel powerful, you feel like you can take on the world.
and boy does your heart go on overdrive.
>World is based on randomness, your very gender is an example.
>Choose to do that or that.
>Best way to choose is randomly.
If dubs you do what you posted.
Kms obnkf
kill my dog
>I can't understand how it works so it must be random!
Is it normal during sex to sort of like not feel anything but also feel something?
Let me explain
>was quite hard to get my dick in her at first, almost kind of painful and felt like there was this wall
>kept pushing in anyway
>she was really wet, vagina gunk oozing everywhere
>felt like my dick was gliding along ultra smooth sheets of silk, completely unlike normal fapping
>felt extremely loose but also gripping my dick completely
or was she just a whore that was really loose?
She'd had 5 dicks in her before me, 2 of them boyfriends (so 3 one night stands).
After she told me her previous sex partners inside my head I was like 'nope nope nope'.
How the fuck am I supposed to know norman scum?
Delete this thread and make it on /soc/
>>29655160
I had the same with the last person I had sex with years ago. Fapping is better than sex
>>29655200
yeah it took a long, long time to get off and it took 3 goes before finally I ejaculated.
>mfw there are people on this board RIGHT NOW who don't drink soda
Why the hell would a man cuck himself out of life's pleasures?
Please give me one good reason, in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy an ice cold RC cola
Coca is besta bro. Tho the local cola that's called (shit u not) Cockta that's rosehip-flavoured is 2 tha bomb.
>tfw all out of vanilla coke and only have mtn dew and code red left
Just make sure you brush your teeth
What kind of woman is this?
I want to search for this kind of porn
Help this nigger out
>>29655115
Dravidian South Indian
>tfw analytical racist
>>29655115
lndian MILF
>>29655198
I say too light for South India. She's a pale even for a North India.
t. been to India
I want to fuck my mother!!!!!!!!!
>>29655097
You crazy motherfucker.
>>29655097
DEGENERATE
E
G
E
N
E
R
A
T
E
[how is this not originalos]
>He hasn't gotten to
Tough luck man.
Was /rust/ the ultimate robot?
>>29655070>>>/reddit/ >>>/tv/
>>29655070
If we consider the fact that robots could have wife and kids then yes but otherwise he's ISTP/cyborg archetype
No, just a broken man.
Who else /GTX970/ here?
>tfw GTX960
I-i was stupid and rushed
>Who else got no pc at all
Try that. You have it good faggot.
>>29655060
4gb or 2gb?
Love of my life says she'll date me if I compose a song for her. Am I the retarded one for not wanting too or is she for asking me that?
>Pic not related
You guys can just compose one for me and I'll just send it to her
>>29654964
You are not retarded. She would just turn around and use it as a talking point with her friends.
>omg, look at this song my stalker wrote me lol
Also, this turn of events shod make her less attractive as it reveals her lowly nature. Tell her to fuck off, as you should you fucking normalfag.
>>29655031
She's actually serious. That's not in question
>A-Anon, why do you have so many pictures of that cat on your computer?
>>29654917
common blini
Why do you have so many pictures of yourself on your smartphone roastie?
>>29654917
Kot is best cat
Women are cocksleeves.
they are even bad at the one thing they were bred for. They are useless.
>>29654906
Who is this cocksleeve?
>>29655539
Ariana Marie.
Reverse Google image search would have told you that.
Fembots: do you like young-looking boys w/ babyface?
>>29654870
unironically my original weakness
I hope this doesn't come off as pedo
>Frodo
>Babyface
Look at that chin/jaw tho. The only babyish thing about his face is that his skin is insanely nice
>>29654870
Yes I'm genuinely attracted to teenage-ish looking boys.
Despite the "men age like wine" meme, if you go out into the real world teenage boys are usually really cute and masculine without looking haggard like 25+ men. By 25 men just look old and used up, wrinkly, with balding and saggy skin. They just look used and worn UNLESS they spent their youth taking care of themselves, which few do.
Any women who actually prefers older men has daddy issues or is lying to herself.
In 300 characters or less.
Born. Crappy family. Dweeb weirdo doesn't fit in. Creep has no friends and drops out of school. Reprehensible looser NEET is in his 20's and spends all his time on 4chan.
Used to be popular in school, friends with everyone, left school, never saw anybody again.
Started 'working' with my dad while I searched for a real job, four years later and I'm still working there.
Used to have a few 'friends', suddenly they're not interested in seeing me now I've stopped smoking weed, haven't seen anyone in a year, going to kill myself soon.
>>29654807
JUST
This comment is NOT orginal
Buzzfeed vs Men
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFxiZjayyZg
This 11 year old girl got 500'000 subscribers in 3 months. Something is just not right here. Is she guided by her parents? I mean I'm just 23 and already feel old watching such content. Is the new generation all like this?
>>29654788
Why is it ok to have a conversation with a camera.
She should remove the burps. It's not funny, but disgusting and childish
>>29654867
Well, might have something to do with her being a child.
