Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7449. page
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I'm looking for someone to give me love and affection. In return I will do almost anything.Btw I'm crazy
What won't you do? I am interested in taking that offer.
I will do it. Seriously. I will try to give you all my love. Contact?
sorry but I am probably too sadistic to help you out
>tfw she rejects your advances
that's fucked up. guy/girl who cut her hair should be suspended.
>>25090068
You must be new here desu
>>25090068
Why? It's just fucking hair, suspend my dick you fucking roastie
Tell me your story, and I'll give it to you straight whether you're fucked or not.
It will give you some comfort knowing if you're completely fucked because then you'll know you did everything you could do and it's out of your power now.
Kissless virgin? Mental or physical disabilities? Traumatic experiences? Did something really awful or embarrassing? I can deal with them all and tell it to you straight. I have a doctorate in misery and fuckedness.
>>25089818
Some random facts about me:
> 21
> Kissless virgin
> Have people I can talk to, but can't really call them friends.
> Graduating from Uni this year (if everything goes well)
> Socially awkward
> Can't make normal conversation with stranger or far friends.
> Spent most of my time watching Anime and playing games
> Am developing love for Anime waifu's.
> Had been bullied a lot in Highschool, but I left that behind. Uni had much less bullying.
Rate me OP!
bored and alone
>21
>3 year neet
>several undiagnosed mental illnesses
>rare breed of highschool and university dropout
>virgin
>no friends
>never had a job
>lived entire life in escapism
>5-10 reading obsessively
>10-18 mmo obsessively
>18-21 dead eyed, dissociative browsing
ha ha ha do u think im easy? no that's you.
BURN
this is you, you are in the dark alone reading this with unkept and greasy hair with no emotion in your face except that of despair and hopelessness
>>25089789
>wardrobe in sight
At least he can stream his suicide easily.
I'm actually reading this in a well lit, clean room, with nice fluffy hair. I still feel like shit inside, but there's nothing I hate more than being dirty.
Jason Schwartzmann not looking so hot these days
>your parents will never proud of you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHZaT3Zrqhk
Kills me inside since they've supported me (financially) all my life. I feel like I owe them a lot in terms of money and I can't even make them proud.
https://youtu.be/06ioSRwzFGg
help
she is agreeing to go out, she wants to see a movie, but she seems bored and uninterested, i don't understand
what do i do to make her more interested? why is she even agreeing to go out in the first place?
I'm autistic please help me not blow it
>>25089571
Gift her the glans
>>25089571
you can literally ignore your date at the movies. don't take her to a movie. She's just dragging you along so you will buy her a ticket.
>>25089693
dude, i offered to take her to skyzone trampoline park, she said it wasnt her thing and shed rather go to a movie
>Say something stupid
>Close the thread as it fills with replies
>waiting for someone to reply to my post
>it's just some guy replying to multiple posts with a reaction pic
>>25089384
Show us the post, big guy.
>>25089384
>post a huge, elaborate paragraph refuting someone's retarded post
>suddenly realize he was just joking
>get into an internet debate
>other guy uses the ">HURRDURR CAPSLOCK STRAWMAN OF WHAT YOU SAID" argument
Every time. No point even arguing anymore.
>>25089374
>No point even arguing anymore
Now you're learnin'. It's a sign of growing up.
>>25089374
>get into an internet date
>other guy uses the ">HURRDURR CAPSLOCK STRAWMAN OF WHAT YOU SAID" argument
Every time. No point even arguing anymore.
>>25089374
just smile and acknowledge your victory. Sometimes they put up a real fight on the internet, and sometimes they surrender in impotent fury.
I've got $4k in my bank account what car can i buy that will get me a gf?
>4k in the bank
>still no car
you should go to home depot and buy some rope.
Mercury Grand Marquis
>>25089334
I'm in the same situation as OP. I've been using my mom's car
Alright, I'm about to order some pizza. So you guys tell me what kind of pizza you want along with your favorite toppings. I'll be paying, don't sweat it.
i like pepperoni black olives and feta cheese.
Anything sans vegetables.
>>25089252
Everything but those dirty rubbery mushrooms please. Ask for extra sause and make sure they don't skimp on the olives!
Can we also get some garlic sticks?
So my parents came across a nude photo of me. They never directly confronted me about it, and they don't know that I know they did. Instead, my mom keeps saying shit like "Oh, I heard in the news about some guy who sexted his girlfriend and now he went to jail, what do you think about it?" and other shit like "I don't understand why people would send naked pictures of themselves!" She just keeps bringing this up and it's just upsetting. I'm not even embarrassed. They deserve it for being so fucking nosy. They always think that I'm trying to get high so their nosiness has lead to them seeing their son's boner. They deserve that. Maybe it'll teach them a lesson.
But my mom KEEPS BRINGING IT UP thinking shes sly or something. It's ridiculous and obvious. She's bringing it up like every week. Today when she brought it up I was just like "Mom, stop talking to me about this". Like as if I'm some filthy degenerate for having a picture of my dick. She sees that I'm miserable, depressed and have nothing going for me in my life and then tries to shit on me for having a pic of my dick. Fuck you mom.
>being 17
>>25089242
she obviously wants it anon
>>25089261
I am 19. I'm an adult.
>you've got to be eternally thankful to women for passing an enormous shit and having to be fat for 6 months (first 3 months is barely noticeable)
Anyone else thought how ridiculous this is? Childbirth is no more painful or frustrating than having a bone broken.
Why do they love being pregnant so much? Fucking weird desu
>tfw I would love childbirth if I got to be pumped full of narcotics
I've heard of some women getting fucking IV fentanyl. That's fucking nuts, I want some of that.
>>25089203
eh hmmm
> I remember that me and my sis were molested by my father
First time I tell it.
Is it real or I just remember things that never happened?
I didn't talk to him since I remembered it, I feel guilty.
Why are you complaining? At least you've had sex
Sorry to hear, me and my sister suffered the same with our parents.
>2016
>Bernie Sanders elected President
>Universal Basic Income implemented
>Wagecucks forced by law to continue working while Alpha NEETs have sex with their wives and get free government checks for twice the average wagecuck salary
You guys ready for the future?
And then you wake up from that dream, and again you're miserable and alone like the rest of us.
>>25089113
at least you admit how miserable you are
UBI! Omg pepe, you are hilarious! Gotta put that in your next routine!
ITT: Post the image that best represents your life as of this moment
Pic related
This post is original I swear
A bit dramatic but gets the point across. I'm not homeless and I don't inject, but I just stay in my bed and avoid my problems and get high off morphine. I love opiates!
It's all good with meme.
