Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6004. page
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>Wake up one day in a parallel universe
>You find out that your 'parallel' mom greatly resembles your oneitis/celebrity crush
>Other than that literally nothing else is different
wat do?
>>25793209
Jack off to my mom.
This is a shitty parallel universe
if anyone's concern in this situation is getting off and not finding out how the fuck you got there than you're a faggot.
>>25793209
probably mourn over the fact i'll never see my real mom again.
I haven't showered since thanksgiving.
me neither
a-are you me
>>25793192
Don't give up now senpai
damn dude i'm neet and shower atleast once every other week
>you will never live in the USA
>you will never shop in Walmart and find anything you seek
>you will never enjoy the huge variety of fast food
>you will never be able to just drive a short time and get to beautiful landscape with mountains, desert and lakes
>you will never live in a nice small house on your own property in the suburbs, living a comfy and calm life
Any US-bots wanna marry me so I can get a greencard? ;___;
>tfw you will never spend most of you life in prison for some harmless crim
>>25792920
You will never walk around in fear that some asshole with a tiny penis has a concealed carry permit and a gun on him at all times.
>>25792920
Just walk over here. Millions of Mexicans do it every year senpai.
This is a brand new avantgarde meme called ''caramello'' or if you want ''le caramello guy''. It's top of the notch meme OC highest quality - and definitely ready to replace pepe and wojak
This is le caramello face, following the marxist guidelines for art i created it, so that my art is useful. You can use le caramello face in discussions on image board to express your emotional state of mind or for new memes on reddit, 9gag and facebook. for example
>go netflix and chill with girl and shes like my mom died will you go with me to le hospital
forced meme is forced my good sir
le carmello face is a bad meme I do not approve
>his waifu is a manic pixie dream girl
>he doesn't read manga
>he likes overrated animes like opm and sao
What's wrong with opm?
>opm overratted
>>25792387
>>25792397
It's shit senpai. SHIT.
This is the futures only defense for used up whores.
>>25791919
>Fucking one man fifty times doesn't stretch the vagina, but fucking fifty men once stretches it irreparably
How, Anon? I literally don't understand. Does the vagina somehow "know" that it's a different penis?
>>25791919
The best way to tell if a girl is a whore.
>>25791949
No, fucking one man 50 times does it too. But the vagina will tighten or loosen over time to the size insertion that's put in it.
who /fat/ here?
>>25791803
>6'0 170 lbs
>still have chubby stomach
Kill me desu senpai
5' 10" 245 lbs reporting in
somehow this was not original
6'0 165lbs :( like 75kg for people from inferior countries.
>mfw no qt 3.14 green-eyed ginger gf to live the rest of my life with on the country side of Northen Sweden
Is suicide the only option?
Yup, du it
>>25791756
preferably stream it
>>25791742
yes suicide is the only option really for us.
If I'm naturally ugly, acne makes me look a hundred times worse.
>>25791568
I feel that original comment
>>25791568
>tfw cheekbone area scarred and deformed by acne
>tfw Edward James Olmos cheeks
eeew get out of my face you creep! *sighs*
>>25791498
Did he actually start to cry in the third panel?
Serves him right for idolizing celebrities.
>>25791498
This shit always pisses me off. The o ly reason celebrities have anything is because of people like this guy. Is it really so hard to smile and sign your name on something? Are you really so ungrateful that you can't spare like two minutes of your time to make some guys' day? Celebrities who shit in their fans don't deserve their success.
>>25791613
Two minutes for every single cuck who ask for an autograph adds up real quick if they took the time to acknowledge every single one of you disgusting slobbish fucks they'd have literally no time to themselves
This guy gives me reasons to live
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpIVAzPdQMo&list=PLuXVJtG6oNtG8ViYjazh_oLw8Km8yWYDY&index=1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSO1KWLGd50
god tier youtubers thread
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaiNVjr-HAs
hipster as fuck but I still enjoy his vids somehow
>>25791386
Sometimes he makes me depressed when he reviews cheap knock-off toys or "video game systems" because I image really poor parents buying them for their kids.
>tfw you want to work really hard and become /fit/ but some people say it helps and some people say it doesn't
Well which is it?
Also bonus video, I feel like this would be my experience: http://youtu.be/wPRaxcgLClI
>>25791156
do it for your health!
in all honesty attracting the opposite sex will come down more to the confidence rather than the looks as that will raise you a couple points anyway
a good face is more important but it does help a little
>>25791181
>>25791193
It's weird, sometimes I act like a little bitch, but others I do great yet STILL get rejected. Just this past week, I was confident and funny and this girl in my class (I'm an 18 year old high school senior, not underage) was having fun too. Then, the second I ask her out it's as if she remembered I'm not attractive, then she stopped making eye contact when she came up with an excuse as to why she can't. Now I know she was lying because earlier she said "yeah I'm just gonna be lazy all weekend" but suddenly when I ask her she has to go to someone's birthday party, and she has a million things to do at once, blah blah blah, and also the avoiding eye contact made it extra obvious she wasn't telling the truth.
Now, I feel like my confidence helped but I got cock-blocked by the fact that I'm unnatractive, but I'm still not sure. Maybe someone with more experience than me can analyze this situation? This tends to happen a lot to me.
post your favourite mass murderers/serial killers
1. Elliot Rodger 'the supreme gentleman'
2. Anders Breivik
3. Harold Shipman
>>25791002
>Breivik being paranoid.
Recent events in Germany about the refugees shows he was right.
>Elliot no suicide.
But he did kill himself.
>>25791002
I like that guy in the france school the most
Elliot Rodger shot himself.
There is only one seat left on your life boat.
Two passengers approach one is a basic-bitch stacey, the other a hood-tier nigger.
>You are legally obligated to save one of them
>You think there might be another lifeboat, but you aren't sure
>Seats are single occupancy only
>You can't give up your place because you are in charge.
>It may be many weeks before you are rescued
>Everyone else in the boat is chill
Who do you save?
Why is she degrading her self like that?
This is a dumb question, OP.
Women and children first.
Bros before hoes man
Who else good looking but creepy, akward, and unsocial personality prevents you from getting a gf?
nobody because you can't be good looking and unsocial
>>25790676
>implying
original comment do not steal
>>25791013
I'm not implying anything you mong
It's an absolute fact
if you were actually good looking you wouldn't have any reason to be unsocial because every social encounter would be a very pleasurable activity
only delusional faggots think they are good looking but still hated by everyone
