Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3755. page
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>at work
>asian girl comes in
>absolutely beautiful
>the sweetest voice
>for the first time in my life,i had butterflies
>had to check her ID
>shes a year older than me
>finally a qt my age
>she laughs at me when my machine isnt scanning properly
>the sweetest laugh. literally made my heart stop
>she leaves, never to be seen again
Its not fair. It just took me a year to get over the last girl and i promised myself i would never like 3D again... i want to see her again.
I know her full name and address. Should i surprise her?
>>28028777
yes go for it with cloroform
>>28028777
you work at a gas station too anon?
>>28028777
Definitely visit her at night, also bring a gun and some drugs.
This is gonna sound a bit autistic, but I'm in a good mood and want to blogpost.
Since like 2007, I have been unable to function well socially unless I imagine myself as a Pokemon. I don't say anything different or move any different, I just kind of imagine myself as having an overall demeanor of the Pokemon. My most common Pokemon are Chesnaught (When I'm feeling gentle and quiet; my normal self), Zoroark (When I'm feeling slightly edgy), and Slurpuff (When I'm beta as fuck). I have others as well. Before gen 5/6 came out it was usually Lucario.
Anyway, there's a girl at CVS who I like a lot. She always seems into me and she's chubby and nerdy so she's in my league. She's cute and I want to snuggle in her soft THICK. I've been wanting to get her number for a while, but I haven't been able to catch her when she's working.
Today, I finally saw her and was ready to ask her for her number, but I realized I didn't have a Pokemon I could use that was confident enough to ask her out. I needed to think of one fast, and Pokken was on my mind. So I thought of Sceptile, and the seductive grinning and purring that he does in that game. He seems really confident and alpha as fuck.
And I did it! I actually got a girl's fucking number. Holy shit. She seemed really happy as well. It was the first time I was Sceptile and I felt like an alpha motherfucker. It's obviously too early to tell what will happen, but if I ever get laid I will probably be the first person who ever lost their virginity because of Scepile.
>>28028666
>a bit autistic
>a bit
also /vp/ would probably be better for this
>>28028666
You, sir, are a fucking genius
>>28028666
> I have been unable to function well socially unless I imagine myself as a Pokemon
stopped reading there
fembots, are you happy with the way your vagina looks? Or are you a roastie?
>>28028622
2 and 10 are pretty good
>>28028622
Could be better I guess. It kinda look like 21
>>28028693
21 is among the better ones, you could be alot worse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9uD7yM6bxQ
>girls in ages of 20-23 asked about their sex count
>99% of them say over 20 partners
>lowest is 3 partners
>I'm a 25 male and still a virgin
How did it turn that way that females can reach their 30's with over 100 sexual partners and that would be considered average but a male who has had over 10 different partners by the time he's 30 is considered a Chad god?
>>28028602
pop culture says its okay to be a whore these days
a REALLY, REALLY shitty social culture.
Then again just browse imgur or Reddit and suddenly all the guys there have lost their virginities, so maybe we're all just some fucking losers clumped together.
>>28028602
>mfw they hit the wall and want to settle down with a beta
>I, along with millions of other men, will stay in my basement playing vidya and fapping to 2D
No betabux for you, roasties
>TFW having a gf makes life unbearably stressful and it's just not worth it
>>28028598
>mfw girls are literally a meme
>>28028598
ROBOTS YOU MUST REALIZE THIS.
TFWNOGF is not your problem. YOU are your problem.
>>28028598
>>28029530
This is 100% correct. All lifes problems dont magically melt away when you get a gf. It's just another thing to fuck you up emotionally.
Does anybody else feel rage at the though of a pure qt grill being banged by some Chad just wanting someone to bang in order to fulfill his disgusting urges? I hate whores and obnoxious women, but the thought of an innocent qt girl having sex with a Chad or someone other than a saint-like male in wedlock really grinds my gears. I would behead all of these people in a heartbeat without a second thought.
>tfw your oneitis qt pure waifu might have taken a dick from some disgusting man
>tfw she might have had sexual relations with a woman as well
I want to kill the guy(s) that did it. I want to behead him and parade his head around the city. These types of women don't deserve this. They're rare enough as it is. These pure women need to be protected and only allocated to males that fit saint status.
Fuck, I don't even want to have sex with my oneitis. I just want to be with her and form a bond. The thought of even sticking my weiner into her is fucking disgusting and degrades her. I will kill all of the Jamals and Chads if they try to do so as well.
are you 12?
pretty sure your oneitis wants chad's dick more than anything.
if this isn't satire, open your eyes faggot.
yeah maybe when i was still a naive faggot
now i know all women are calculating wolves in sheeps clothing
no matter how "cute" or "innocent" they look
they are all whores
I don't care. girls like that don't exist. i hate the idea of centering my life around some unfaithful roastie. might as well just live for yourself and only yourself
What if tomorrow we all wake up as real anthropomorphic creatures? What would you do? What would the world be like?
Re enact no pain no gain
Nothing would change. Are you delusional or something? We would still fuck with people because
>muh fur color is so much better
Normies would still be normies, chads still chads and you would still suck. Literally nothing would change. We would just seek other excuses to hate each other.
>anthropomorphic
>described or thought of as being like human beings in appearance, behavior, etc.
Already living that dream, OP.
Why do short people feel like they are entitled to fight dirty in a street fight?
go pick on a short person and see what happens. They go for crotch shots, pull out a weapon, or they fight with lethal force. They have no honor.
>honor
>in a street fight
>honor in da streetz
OP is a butthurt MMAfag who got his ass kicked by a little mexican
>>28028497
There's no such thing as honor in a fight unless you're in a professional ring. Otherwise fights are all about who can incapacitate the other first.
who /ozzy/ here?
>>28028441pleb
Who /Varg/ here?
>>28029065
churchburningintensifies.mp4
who /fozzie/ here?
We are our thoughts
>>28028314
me on the rightt
>>28028314
No free will.
Always remember that if theres still life in you.
Do now what can be done later.
Where there is a will, there is a way.
This is not a bait thread or anything like that.
This is a legit question. What do you it is that makes asian men so unappealing to women and black men so appealing to women? Why is it that so many white women seem obsessed with black men but almost no white woman seems to like asian men? Is it because asian men are the most feminine and black men the most masculine? Is masculinity really that important to women? Are feminine looking white guys completely fucked?
>>28028300
>Is it because asian men are the most feminine and black men the most masculine?
Yes, the inverse is true in that asian women are the most feminine and black women are the most masculine.
Asian men were doomed from birth.
>>28028300
>manlets with little dicks
Gee I wonder why.
fucking blonde roasties DIE!!!!11
AHHHHHH ASIAN UPRISING FUCKING RIGHT NOW
Ask a chad in ruins anything.
>>28028298
You don't look like a chad.
just bee yourself, right brah?
>>28028326
Well.. It's a subjective matter of perspective, but I gotta tell you this, I have a 22cm long 17cm thick penis and I sure as hell could fucking kill you with my bare hands, how's that sound faggot? Gonna cry?
This picture is making me upset.
First of all, it ruined Tomoko for me because it made me realize she would look like this IRL.
Second, I'm really, really, REALLY fucking sad for this girl. I mean fuck, I wish there's a way to save these people.
>>28028232
>she would look like this IRL.
no she wouldnt anon
she would look just as qt as she does in the anime according to the laws of anime proportionality
that ugly ass mexican is just a shit very bad imitation of tomoko
She'd be a really plain looking Japanese girl without makeup.
>>28028254
Yes, she would. If Tomoko was that qt in real life she would be a 9/10 and not able to have the same lifestyle.
>"Robot, you look kind of down. You wanna cuddle?"
>>28028231
I want to be a nice wife to this man
>>28029136
If you are a woman, then you can fuck off. You have enough straight men to turn into drooling idiots.
>>28028231
he looks like this faggot on omegle
Who /(you)whore/ here?
FB-grade faggotry
I'm not even giving you the sweet (You)s
Reddit cancer treating (You)s like upboats.
>tfw post something creative that takes a good amount of thought
>lucky to get 1 (You)
>post something easy that you aren't trying to get (You)s with
>over a dozen replies
