Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5175. page
- Home
- Board: /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
- Reading: Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5175. page
How often do you clean your dick?
It feels like every time I masturbate, I have to worry about dickcheese or dried semen in my foreskin. Do I really have to deal with a smelly dick every time i have a post shower fap?
Wash your dick more often and efficiently. If you don't have phimosis, you have no reason to have a dirty dick.
>>26668734
But does that mean multiple times a day? seems like a hassle.
>>26668752
once a day should be fine
Can a robot join the Masons?
>>26668633
Are you a rich old douche, or the son of a rich old douche?
Why would you want to? It's a literal "muh sekrit klub" and from what I've been told, all they do is drink together. You can drink without being in the Masons.
Robots yes, NEETS no. You need to pay dues.
My mum's a tattoo artist, and she was asked to draw an owl on a branch with the freemason's symbol hidden in it's eye by some ex-militant. The guy asked if she knew of the symbol, so she said no. He paid, got inked and left.
I thought masons would have some reputable artists for this kinda shit.
*yawn* good morning wagecuck. I know it's still early but you know how Monday traffic can be. Better to get an early jump on it than be late again, you know how important it is to Mr. Shekelstein that you are on time every day! He will be checking your time card once he get in to the office after his morning round of golf, you wouldn't want to get written up again would you?
Another day, another dollar.
>>26668622
Thisis a good reminder for wagies.
*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
Wakie wakie sleepie wagie
As a NEET I find the sad plight of the wagecuck a moving subject for poetry
Hurry wagecuck, don't be late!
Barely time to have a shower
You friend the NEET can masturbate
But Shekelberg has all the power;
He alone decides your fate.
The NEET awakes refreshed and free
To lift his weights or smoke a bong
But Shekelberg laughs with happy glee
As you crawl before the hungry throng
Flip the burgers, bag the fries!
Your workday's barely started yet
"Oh manager!" the smug NEET cries
You made his order incorrect!
Five hours later, nothing's changed
Apart from your paycheck, by some change
Your tears splash the grill like rain
While your boss is at the driving range
And what about our friend the NEET?
He made his way down to your home
You're the laughing stock of the whole street
As the neighbours hear your girlfriend moan.
Is anyone else fucked situation-wise when it comes to meeting girls?
>live in south Louisiana, near the coast
>poor town is divided by a disgusting bayou
>intelligent people with good genes were smart enough not to live down here
>no qts my age throughout all of school life.
>tfw movie theater and mall is 45 minutes away
>tfw you've seen kids from your high school walking around wal-mart for fun.
Holy shit, there is not a single place for me to meet women outside of the local wal-mart. I'm hoping I can make some friends when I start commuting to technical school but my social life has been robot tier since my friends all left for college. I'm so fucked for another 2 months, I haven't talked to someone other than family in a year.
>be robot
>live in california
I belong in a shitty place like New Jersey.
>>26668588
what high school you go/went to?
>>26668611
>be robot
>actually good looking
I would kill to live where you live right now, my best friend went to film school up there. One time I went to New Orleans and nearly cried, dozens of qt girls everywhere I looked.
Sometimes I look around on the way to the store, and considering never seeing my mom again for making me grow up in such a shit hole. Surrounded by stupid inbred Cajuns who want to work on a boat all their lives.
>>26668650
I'll tell you the parish. Lafourche Parish
I made it guys, I finally got a gf; she is taller than me and looks like pic related. Its a dream come true and I can finally leave this board of wretched depression with a light sprinkling of beta humour. I'll miss you guys.
>>26668527
>I finally got a gf; she is taller than me and looks like pic related
im jelly
post pics
See you in a month
>>26668527
Bull ring is pretty major red flag so i hope she doesnt have it.
Hi dere Gyus.
Jsut basic remidner to taking the red piul.
God lucks.
Prease take a red piull.
Just freindly reminder of takeing the red piul. Red pitul is for shows the true. Blue is for only crucks. You take the blue piul if your cuck.
If yuo dont take a red piul you rae most porbably a cruck like JAME ROLF.
Why are women such liars?
Because we let them be. The one thing I do like about Islam is that they know how to keep their parasites in line.
>>26668468
If the dad did fell uneasy about it then it was okay. He has no obligation to accept his daughter. He shouldn't be mean but he is not obligated to accept her.
because there are no repercussions or consequences for women
tfw your online friends start asking about your personal life
>tfw your erp partners get upset if you ask whether or not they're masturbating
You're one of those faggots, aren't you, OP?
>"so anon, what do you do?"
>"like what actually is your job?"
I hate this feel.
>>26668447
fuck off homo faggboi
Hi guys. My gf is playing video games all day with some fucking stragers, she said she wants to get to muh gold division bruh. I am so pissed off on her. I ended messaging her since im the only who initiates chat. Shes been playing that leafue of fagets for 3 days straight and havent sent me a single fukcing message. She will wake up after a week and be like oh im sorry anon i just got into it i wanted to grind my leagues. Am i being cucked. What the fuck. I am so butthurt. How can person choose fucking vidya and faggoty friends over a bf whos been in relationship over 3 years. Aaaaaaaaaa
>>26668350
>Can't make it to gold.
Tell her to hang herself, she won't make it anywhere in life desu. Make sure you plant a tree on top of her grave.
>>26668350
She clearly doesn't love you and thinks little of you.
I've been with my gf for 2.5 years and she spends ALL of her free time with me to this date, if i ever got myself in a situation like you i'd honestly just end things off i can't even imagine the rage i'd get if i found out she was cucking me.
Also i think that if you want your GF to be faithful you have to make it clear that she can't have male friends, she can have acquaintances who she talks ocassionally on school/job but that's it, no outside contact.
I'd just tell her to stop the bullshit gaming with beta orbiters or to fuck off.
>>26669507
this is weak
i am original
ITT: We come up with a title and a short synopsis to the movie based on our lives.
Other anons write reviews.
>>26668236
Nah too much work
>>26668236
/n3t0/ - Cuckolding and NTR (2016)
An everyday family man starts to question his relationship with his wife and children when he discovers a hidden board on his favorite internet forum.
>>26668339It's fictional but fuck it, thread isn't even moving anywhere
Anybody interested in playing Minecraft/Old School RuneScape/League of Legends/Counter-Strike 1.6/Killing Floor?
Plebeian taste, I know, but I find them all a lot of fun.
Let's make friends ITT!
>>26668182
I'll play CS:GO
>western gaming
vomit-tier
>>26668193
I don't play GO, sorry. ;_;I recently tried Condition Zero. It's actually pretty fun and there are some really good servers for it.
Was eating lunch and as I was leaving in my car a guy came up to my window and asked me to not open until later and this is what I find inside. Not a number but a sweet message. Guys take note. Rather have this then your number.
i don't give a goddamn what you'd rather have
>>26668167
I'm surprised it wasn't filled with anthrax.
>>26668167
But if you don't have my number how will we meet up and bang?
ITT we pretend to be Stacy.
>>26668124
Go away you weirdo
Damm Tyrone your big greasy nigger cock sure feels good thrusting around violently into my white womb, please ejaculate inside me and end my Grandfather's blood lineage by giving me an ugly nigger baby to raise on my own until some white cuck beta comes through to save the day and take care of us both while I still fuck your big nigga dick on the side, I am so sorry for slavery!
hahaha what even.
>5'8''
>hairy as fuck
>cryptorchid
>chubby
>8+ years relationship with a qt
Are you guys even trying ?
>5'5
>missing a tooth in the front
>poor as fuck
>black
>gf of three years
>>26668110
She's cucking you I guarantee it
And how old are the both of you? How much of your money do you give to her?
Tonight was the happiest I've felt in a long time, and it's basically because I listened to my next door neighbor - a girl - get the shit kicked out of her.
Someone ended up calling the cops on the dude and he was just led out of the building in handcuffs like 30 minutes ago. When the cops came, everyone on our floor was looking out their door, watching, chatting among each other, etc. These people were expressing genuine grief for her.
I faked concern but really I couldn't help but feel happy about it. I'm pretty sure she's actively fucking like 20 different guys. Frankly I'm not surprised that 1/20 guys ended up being a piece of shit who beats the tar out of women. Maybe I'll get some peace and quiet for once instead of listening to her loud fuck sessions and techno music.
I'm a bit disturbed that this makes me happy. Am I a sicko or a psychopath?
N O I C E tbqh fan
thats uh.... not a particularly healthy way to think about someone having the shit beaten out of them lmao
good job
>>26668002
you should fake sympathy for her and get her to fuck you desu
