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Has anyone here jerked off to completion at work before? I get so nervous I can't shoot.
>>29051315
Where do you work anon?
Dankest dick pepe
>>29051345
At a financial institution
In the bathroom sometimes. Pic related, a former coworker of mine, sometimes looking at her turned me on enough that I could fap in less than 2 minutes.
>tfw gf really likes rats
>i hate the fuckers
>shwe brings her two rats over to my place basically twice a week and i have to feed them milk
>live in a shithole country where milk is fucking expensive
>what do
>>29051181
get a snake let it loose, it take care of your rat problem.
>>29051181
Get a knife and hack at the latch on their cage, then put them outside. Make it look like they chewed through and escaped
kill your gf
this is ashe_aelois on twitch.
>>29051168
is it a guy?
i-it's a guy, right?
>>29051201
no she is a gay woman.
i had a dream that i was streaming on twitch the other day, and i considered doing it after my dream- i'm qt, but i finally uninstalled dota, after 3 miserable years.
>just drank an entire 12-pack of Bud Light
>>29051127
>Bud light
Are you shitting me?
>>29051127
and whats the problem anon
>>29051154
he's going to be shitting himself soon
OP you're disgusting. drink good beer you fat faggot
i think niggers are the niggers of the world
>>29051106
Wrong, gypsies are.
is that a dirty haitian?
>>29051055
>fetus hanging out of her vagina
Hola /r9k/
Let's help each other out with Tinder!
How many matches do you usually get? How low do you set the bar when right swiping?
I got a match for the first time yesterday and I don't know how to start the convo, what are some nice but simple openers?
Bumpin some porn in the meantime.
>>29051053
fellow robot here
>How many matches do you usually get?
20-30 a day
How low do you set the bar when right swiping?
i'm very picky
what are some nice but simple openers?
guys always message so i dunno lol, something funny? just try to be 6'1 or taller and offer to pay for her
I only swipe right 6+/10, sometimes 5s to practice game and get a shitload of matches. I get meaningful conversation every now and then but my game sucks in general.
A good way to open convos when you don't know what to say at all is "hey [name], I gotta ask you something". So she says "what" and you follow with something like "ok but promise you wont laugh". she'll say yeah so you can say "I'm not sure yet, are you a fun/kind/confident/etc person?" and then start talking about her personality without asking the original question you said you had to ask. Then you can start talking about meaningless shit like horoscope, make some jokes, and when you run out of things to say you can go back to the starting point and say that the thing you wanted to ask her was if she's down to grabbing some drinks.
It's easier said than done though.
>finally get gf
>she doesnt text you for an hour or so
>start crying and thinking she hates you
is anyone else really insecure here?
>talk to girl
>she digs me
>see her talking to other guys
>storm out in a rage
yep, pretty insecure here anon
>meet girl
>find out she has boyfriend
>instantly become 1000x more awkward around her and passively ignore her rather than becoming a beta orbiter
>somehow think im better than a beta orbitor
>>29050952
>really insecure
>has gf
You don't know the first thing about being insecure.
>tfw raised in an orphange
>tfw never experienced the touch of a mother
I feel nothing
I am an emotionless vessel
>>29050908
>tfw raised by a psychotic mother
>tfw she drank 24/7
>tfw she put cigarettes out on me/beat me/lied to others that 'I abused her'
>tfw she read poetry about her 3 abortions to me at 8 years old
>tfw she told me sex is a tool to control men
>tfw she raised me to hate my dad for 'leaving her'
>tfw she kept me away from him
>tfw I moved into dads at 13 cause she was an abusive fuck
>tfw her last words to me were, "Get the fuck out of my house. I never loved you"
Better your mom got rid of you than raised you like me.
>>29050967
What the fugg
I'm sorry you had to go through that anon
>>29050908
So you never experienced this?
http://pl.xhamster.com/movies/6139372/good_boy_for_mommy.html
Men aren't much different from women. For the most part, men only like one type of woman just like women like one type of man(Chad as you would say).
In any country what men desire is the same
>skin that isn't darker than tan
>small nose
>thin-average body
>big eyes
>long hair
>full lips
>breasts that are big but not too big
>out going but feminine personality
>approachable but not too easy to get
Men all over the world like one type of woman and women all over the world try to mold themselves to fit this ideal
define "tan"
>>29050886
This here boi
>>29050868
Lose weight, you fat sow.
Why do wagecucks get so angry with neets?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sStLfKhzevE
>>29050861
They're fucking jealous innit bruv. It's a no-brainer.
i think it all boils down to stress my NEET brethren
>>290590910
That's definetly true. NEETs have low level of stress hormones and high testosterone because of a relaxed easy lifestyle. The constant stress that a wage cuck goes through turns him into a cortisol producing cuck.
Who /cyborg/ here?
>gf falls into my lap
>could be an actual successful person if I try
>people like me
>still no car or license
>years of crippling depression have taken their toll
>have no belief in myself
>i can't relate with robots or normies
please tell me someone else knows these feels.
>>29050846
Right here anon. You aren't alone in these feels ;_;
>>29050846
The people here call that a failed normie
>>29050846
edgy
here's a (you) for that edgy blogpost tho, you earned it
is it truwe that women have a "partying" phase, then a settling phase?
It's true that I want to smell mary elizabeth winstead's panties.
You are thinking about the Asari.
t. a Salarian biologist
>>29050761
Yes, about 28 they start to panic
What's your ideal first date?
We'd go to an amusement park. The lines would be short and the weather lovely. I would make a lot of jokes in-between the rides, both bad and good ones, and she laughs at all of them while maintaining that look of enjoyment in her eyes. We'd also get ice cream and take a lot of photos.
It would end with a kiss at the ferris wheel while looking at the sunset.
>>29050741
aquarium
fish are nice and the lighting in them is comfy
handie in a bathroom stall
>wake up see this
what are your next moves described in laymans
>>29050682
Hoist upon my cock.
>>29050682
wonder why my phone didn't enter sleep mode after I went to sleep with this being the last thread I read
>>29050682
i pick her up and fly her around like a cute airplane
6"4 here
What does it feel like being a manlet? How bad is it being next to a woman who's taller than you?
G-g-get off my board lanklet
6'6" also interested
I love when women complain about how they could never wear heels with their manlet exs
>>29050705
Well I'm 5'9 but I live in the real world so my girlfriend is still about 2" shorter than me even when she wears her tallest heels.
