TARD THREAD TIME
>on senior trip to Disney World with my friends
>we all go on a roller coaster
>tard gets on behind us with a tard guard
>ride starts, friends and I are having fun
>then the real fun begins
>tard literally screeches through most of the ride
>friends and I hysterically laughing
>ride ends and we get offComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>29622180
Bump totally original senpai
>>29622180
>autistic
>Bad anxiety and only "hear half of conversations"
>comic store owner joking his buffalo wings from buffalo
>I take it serious and tell dad
>dad like "No son, they only joke"
>Keep saying they were serious.
>Mom tells dad just to agree with me.
Being...
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Auuuugh aooba aoba
ROO ROO ROO ROO
Just curious, what do you guys use to clean your urethra?
I used to use just a cotton swab with a little soapy water, but lately whenever we shower my dad uses a small bristle brush to scrub my peehole.
It hurts a lot but he says it's the best way to clean out my filthy cummies.
Any suggestions?
>>29622169
piss anything else is self sabotage
been warned anons
>>29622202
You're stating the obvious.
>>29622169
Sometimes I like to stick 3.5 mm jacks into my pee hole, put on the headphones and pretend I'm listening to Penis FM
>go to google images
>type "[your name] meme"
>post bad memes(image macros)made by normies
Another because why
>>29622163
Fuck that search hurt
I'm not a beaner
Tell me about crisis hotlines.
I'm in over my head and I've been randomly sobbing and hyperventilating.
> how could they even help me?
> are they normies?
> who do you recommend?
>>29622125
> how could they even help me?
They give you someone to talk to and reassure you. They're like an anchor.
> are they normies?
Yes. Many of them are volunteer psychology/psychiatry students.(could be a girl if you want that)
> who do you recommend?
Never used one myself, but you seem like you could use a (you).
>>29622284
I really need a (You). I just want to go back to a normal life, and I wish that I had realized being weird isn't really that bad in comparison to things now. I wonder will they call the police on me if they suspect a suicide attempt?
>>29622125
They will listen to you and then try say something positive to get you feeling better, its a waste of time
Earlier when I was bored I realized that I could calculate the number of potential gfs in the nearby area and so I did. I did try to be generous on the estimates.
First I needed to find the number of females of suitable age(16-22) in the area. (41000)
2. From my female facebook friends I estimated that about 80% (4/5) of girls are currently single. (through the real number is probably smaller).
3. I estimated that percentage of girls that would find me too poor or lived too long away were both 5% (1/20).
4.I am an introvert and I would like to have a girlfriend that is also one. But it is kinda hard to find exact percentage for the country so I made a generous guess that 50% (1/2) of girls are introverts.
5. I would also want a girlfriend that is at least a bit smart say about 33% (1/3)
The current size of potential gfs is now at 4933 girls which I guess isn't that bad at all but...
6. How many girls would find me attractive? Stand out with at least some of my bad behaviors? I can not know for sure but I guess 5% (1/20)
7. But I don't really find many girls physically attractive i'd say about 10% (1/10) girls looks okay to me.
Now lets put all the numbers together
Potential gfs= 41000*0.8*0.95*0.95*0.5*0.33*0.05*0.1=24.42165
TL;DR
24 potential girlfriends out of 41000 or 1 out of 1708
How many potential gfs do you robots have?
>>29622102
Bumping because this seems interesting
>Christian
>virgin
>white
>16 to 26
>beautiful
Pretty much 0. There's plenty of fuck meat around since the only standards there are young and and not fat. I'm always up for being surprised but I highly doubt there is any woman deserving of spending much time with me outside of my bed. Even if I find her I'd only have a Christian wedding, not a marriage.
No woman is good. Most are...
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>>29622102
>16-22
Why such a narrow age range?
>tfw everything gives me a boner but I never want sex
>tfw I get pissed off I get a boner
>tfw I remember how much I hate my mother I get a boner
>tfw I want to punch a wall I get a boner
>tfw I'm watching a series on Television I get a boner
>tfw spacing out I get a boner
>tfw I look at my monitor and want to punch a hole in it because bad day I get a...
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>>29622099
It sounds like being mad gives you a boner
>>29622244
Maybe thats it.
Maybe I'm mad all the time but WHY DOES IT GIVE ME A BONER?
>>29622244
>>29622286
Am I turning into a serial killer or something?!
Riddle me this non white robots
>You're at a seedy as fuck bar in the bad part of your city
>Look out at the tables and make eye contact with pic related
>She says "Be useful for once and buy me a fucking drink shitskin"
Wat do you do?
>>29622093
I really rather not
>>29622093
I'm not a shitskin tho
>>29622093
Green Room was a really good movie.
>tfw tired all the time
oringalocomentalo
>>29622036
Why is that pic uncomfy bullshit?
>>29622036
>tfw bored all the time
am i depressed
>>29622064
probably just edgy
People say you should have saved a years salary by the time you're 30.
>I'm 29
>NEET with no income
>have 0 in savings
Top kek Norman normals I've gamed you're system.
>>29622033
>27 wageslave at retail McJob
>spend my meager earnings immediately on bullshit every week
>hear normies talking about "only" having 40K saved up
How do they do it I'm convinced they are simply lying
>>29622033
>will be 30 in september
>working shit retail job
>have about $450 in the bank, $350 of which has to be taken out for student loan repayment by July 1st
take that normies. it's a real one-two punch
1. i have nothing saved up
2. my education got me nowhere
>>29622107
Stop spending your money on bullshit
Yw
>no cumudders bf
I have pretty big balls, but no where near that size.
>>29622054
they're injected with saline, it's actually pretty fucking dangerous.
>>29622076
they're 100% natty bro
Parents are forcing me to see a female psychologist tomorrow. Any tips or advice on what to do? And I have to go, otherwise they'll kick me out. I really don't trust them and think they're just trying to get a mental disorder labelled onto me, it's a whole schtick they've been doing for the last 10 years.
>>29622009
just do it and get free shit dummy
>>29622009
Use it to your advantage. Let her think you're suffering from some mental illness that will allow you to be labeled "disabled" and then you can collect welfare benefits and live the NEET life.
>>29622009
>forcing me to see a female psychologist
They can't.
>they'll kick me out
They can't.
Do you feel bad for him? I do, I feel like 4chan and ED fucked him over.
I do, but it might have been worth it
Kind of, but his life would be a mess even if he wasn't famous.
>>29622060
We pushed him over the edge.
>my dad happened to be a confident dicklet who was over 6 ft and good looking so he could pull off having a 4 inch erect penis
>I'm 5'9, hunch over from having a shit posture, have a flat nose because I was born without cartilage in it, no confidence and it's only gotten worse being a NEET for 2 years
BRAVO
>my dad is a depressed manlet
>I'm a depressed manlet
well
>>29621995
>at least your not asian
you don't know the feeling
How do you know how big your dad's penis is when erect?
>tfw you'll always be too poor to live in an apartment without cockroaches
I just want this to end /r9k/. :(
l know that feeI, bro.
I moved back to my folks place recently and lord I need to get out of there. But last place the bugs man. They are disgusting. Crawling out of electrical outlets and shit.
>>29621947
Isn't there a special poison that they drag to their colonies, killing all of the offspring?
I'm glad i live on the 37th floor now. No more bugs for me.
>>29621981
I honestly think this is it for me. I got used to never being able to have a lot of money. I got used to having a simple life in a tiny little place. But now these fuckers came because apparently some gypsies or some shit moved into the building and now the building is full of them and there's no way to get rid of them because everyone else in the building is 90 years old and can't even wipe their own ass. I have an impeccably clean place that has practically no furniture, and I still found one IN MY FUCKING...
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If so, which ones are you taking? Would you reccomend it to your fellow robot denizens? Did it improve your life in any way?
>>29621931
Ex-taekwondo fag here. Now taking muay thai + BJJ (brazilian jiu jitsu). Pretty good combination desu.
I've always practiced MA so I can't say it improved my life. I guess you feel safe and shit like that.
Hope that helps, anon.
>>29621931
I did BJJ for about a year in college.
I dropped a lot of weight and got stronger, but it was expensive and I wasn't doing it enough to justify the cost, plus I had an injury that put me out for awhile. I'd still recommend it though, it works your body in every way and teaches you a skill on top of that
I'd like to learn jew jitsu because joe rogan but I am pretty scared to go outside.