Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1322. page
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>hate myself
>from the generation of narcissism
>>16910773
Being born in the great depression would be great.
![IMG_2671[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/6HnhQQq.jpg "IMG_2671[1].jpg")
I am a 19 year old male
I get this feeling a lot that I don't belong, when I be myself around other people they make me feel like an outcast. This has been going on for a while and it feels like I have lost all confidence because I just think that if I try to meet new people they with think I'm a "weirdo"
What should I do? It would be nice to feel better about myself
Everyone feels awkward sometimes.
All you acward social fucks need to get into acting. Learn the power of bullshit.
Hello, /adv/,
I've never posted here so bear with me here.
This summer I'll be heading to Weekend Baltic summer festival, I've never been to any sort of festival, not to mention this big and I was wondering, what is the case with drugs there?
From what I've read on their main page, the festival hosts will not tolerate any sort of illegal drugs inside the area (no shit), but how tough is it enforced?
Has anyone here been to a big festival before?
Is it hard to obtain simple drugs like weed there, or anything else for that matter?
Is it...
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Everyone who goes to those concerts think like you. Others will do it, but statistically like maybe 10-20% will be caught. I'm just shitposting.
>>16910746
Depends where you live and the music genre. You will without a doubt see weed, and psychedelics (Molly, l) will likely be present... But it sounds like you don't know you're way around at all, or have friends or connections so you probably won't see anything besides weed
>>16910753
I'm fine with that, I've never tried anything besides weed in my life and to be honest I would probably only give molly a shot since it is a music festival after all.
Anyways, do you think it will be expensive? I'd smoke weed for sure if I had the chance.
No I don't know my way around at all, I'm heading with a friend who only smokes weed like once or twice a year.
Any idea how I should approach people with the intent of getting high?
What's some good openers to use on dating websites like Tinder or Plenty of Fish?
"Fuck you."
What does it mean when you hang out with a female friend fairly often, have chemistry, but change between finding her repulsive and finding her attractive from one day to the next?
It means you need to date women who are not your friends.
Welcome to THE DANGER ZONE.
What it could be is that you value her friendship, but at the same time you have begun to develop feelings for her romantically. And you dont want to risk either.
The problem lies in that if she didn't see you as a potential partner from the start you have always been just a friend.
Sure there are a few times wjen friendship goes beyond, but tbose are rare. Most of the time you are pretty much set as one or the other, it takes a big event to remove the divisor between the two.
There is also the possibility that she was into you...
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I need someone to explain to me the rational behind having empathy for instigators and false accusers; as well as for the family, friends, and communities that support them and even help them in their efforts or victim blame those effects/affected by them.
>>16910645
The rationale is (supposedly) that everyone deserves empathy, because we would want people to empathize with us.
I can't say I hold with it. There are people in this world who do not deserve empathy (such as instigators), and even people with whom it is actively harmful to empathize with (such as false accusers). Their friends and loved ones, now, that's a different subject: their only crime is being mistaken, and it's tough to blame them for that, given that they are being duped.
>>16910645
If we start from the assumption that there is no gene for being evil, then everyone who does bad things is reacting to things in their past that made them turn sour. It is therefore possible to see them as victims first, and evil-doers only after being victims.
It can take the forgiveness and generosity of a saint to believe that fully, but we all make some small effort to forgive, just to avoid being burned up in resentment.
Live in the UK and I'm 26
Got diagnosed with mayor depression in my teens and have attempted suicide 2. Been in and out of hospital since I was 15.
Iv now got a great job and I rent a place. Been allot better over the last 3 years thanks to medication and therapy.
The problem I have is that I don't have any type of social network. I'm finding it difficult to find people. My life so far has been working or hospital
I hate pubs and clubs and I don't drink. I do gym allot.
Any ideas where I can start to interact with people?
Exact same problem here OP. Mental illness really fucks with your social life. Also looking for answers.
>>16910630
Good luck. I've asked that question a million times here, never got any concrete answers, just those "Go out there and be somebody!" type of non-answers.
UK Londonfag.
The gym. Try and find a group to do gym stuff with.
I have a plan to kill myself before I turn 40, and I turn 38 this year. Is there any chance I could save myself and live out the rest of my life?
I feel sick just typing that out because I know I'm going to do it, and a part of me is scared of what I'm about to do, but I can't imagine any outcome but a gory death in the near future.
For the curious, I'm going to throw myself off a railway bridge in front of a train.
Why 40 specifically? It's a fucking meaningless number.
What made you and your previous significant others break up? Any advice for relationship newbies?
1. bf: he slowly turned into a radical national socialist
2. bf: he moved away to the other side of the world
3. bf: i got pregnant and had an abortion. We didn't make it trough that
4.bf: hopefully never
learn about communication. It might sound clichée but it's the foundation.
Learn about the different way ro show affection (google languages of love).
Have sex often. Look at it as the adults equivalent to playing. It should be lighthearted and something you both look forward too.
There is so so much more, but it would be excessive to type...
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>>16910611
1. gf: met another guy, thought she was in love (after 3y with me). Nope. Tried to get back with me. Nope again.
2. Lost the spark after a few months, wasn't that into her anyway
3. gf: Broke up with me because we wanted different things in life. I was too lazy and she was fucking too much inhibited. Got sad for some time though..
4. gf: was madly in love with, I was less in love, and it broke us. Like I wanted to see her like 3 times a week, she wanted to see me everyday and sleep with...
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Also, this post give good advices
>>16910628
>learn about communication
YES
>Learn about the different way ro show affection (google languages of love).
Yep
>Have sex often.
At least come to an "arrangment" where the 2 persons are ok with
I don't know what to do, anons, and I'd appreciate it if somebody could tolerate my blogposting for a moment and give me advice.
>a few weeks ago, sent an email to my college's counseling services indicating that I think I have some kind of autism spectrum disorder and want to talk about it
>get reply, never schedule appointment because busy as fuck/stressed/lazy/bad at communicating in general/apprehensive about the whole thing to begin with
>wondering whether to...
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>>16910587
(CONT)
I feel like I've always been held to very high standards because some shrink must have told my dad I was some kind of genius, and I've never been able to live up to them because everybody else can clearly handle basic shit better than I can. I don't know if me wanting a diagnosis is just looking for an excuse, or if that's my dad talking. Seriously, I was repeatedly told growing up that I was too bright to have any excuse for anything except a forever flawless performance.
It...
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>>16910587
First of all, you are probably NOT autistic. You are too self-aware and too able to read other people's nonverbal signals and guess what they're thinking. And inability to do that is at the very center of autism.
That is not to say that you aren't socially awkward or have some other mental/social problems. You've fallen into the logical trap that says "If A can sometimes lead to B, then all Bs must be caused by A"
Do see a school counselor, but not to prove/disprove a single...
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>>16910982
>You are too self-aware and too able to read other people's nonverbal signals and guess what they're thinking
That's because of 22 years of hard work and a few years of acting lessons.
>That is not to say that you aren't socially awkward or have some other mental/social problems. You've fallen into the logical trap that says "If A can sometimes lead to B, then all Bs must be caused by A"
That's hardly...
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My bf is rather shy and sometimes tends to tense up when we have sex. Penetrative sex is no prob, but as soon as the focus is on him (hj,bj), he seems to feel a bit awkward. It's not extremely bad, but i can tell and i would love to get him to relax and enjoy it a bit more. How can i help him? I already noticed that it's better when the lights are dimmed and he can "do something" himself. Like finger me or play with my boobs. I can absolutely understand him, i'm the same myself. Do you have any ideas? Maybe you experience the same? What would help you?
>>16910576
some guys dont like blowjobs. i know because im one of them. they are really uncomfortable and can hurt. handjobs are okay if my gf doesnt pull too jard.
>>16910576
drugs
>>16910576
It may actually be a good sign. There are so many idiotic forces out there trying to get guys to think of sex as conquest and girls as prey to be caught and discarded, that the occasional sensitive guy begins to feel guilty about taking pleasure from sex without giving at least as much in return.
(Put another way, when everyone you grew up with told you that a blowjob was demeaning to the girl and proof of how much power you had over her, it can be hard to let a girl you really care about "degrade"...
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how and how often do you communicate with your bf / gf when you are in a relationship ?
just wondering because I was only ever in one, and it was like this.
>at first we would talk on messenger after work during the evening up to bedtime, and a few messages in the morning
>then also a few messages/planning shit during work hours
>there was a period where she would call me around 1 hour each day of the week to talk and was frustrated I had nothing to say / wasn't fun
I...
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Sometimes we send good morning texts. We always have a short, hey how was your day convo before bed. Sometimes we call, maybe once every two weeks. That's it. We see each other once on the weekend.
i'm litterally doing facetime with her 1 hour a day
So I'm overweight due to the meds for my mental illness. anyway I don't care about being a old virgin. I just want to fit in society. you know get some status besides being a bum.
I've pretty much never had a job or want one that is a menial dead end job.
I'm going to college to learn and socialise this year.
....what to say? is there some good position/job where I can socialise and not be bore of the people. Have a fullfilling life.. and all life have to offer?
Why do you care about statut? You just became a wizard and that alone is pretty neat. Just use your new-find power to rock through life at god speed.
welcome to the circle of wizards
>So I'm overweight due to the meds
That's a really nice scapegoat for being out of shape.
Tell me, are you eating healthy and exercising everyday? I'm willing to bet you aren't, but don't let that discourage you from pretending that some tiny pills will give you pounds and pounds of weight and not actual food.
>never had a job or want one
Lazy fat fuck. How exactly do you think you're gong to fit in with society if you can't even contribute? Regardless of whether it's a dead end job or not, everyone needs to start someone. Go outside and exercise, the pills aren't what's making you overweight
Hello /adv/.
How do you get pass what you are?
Background:
>served in the army
>shit happened
>go to therapy
>dig deeper
>figure out that i miss being in the service
>dig even deeper
>figure out that what I miss the most was that when i was in uniform that's what I was, not a Hispanic, but just soldier. another number
>therapist...
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What would be different if you were not Hispanic?
That is a good question, and I wish I could reliably answer it.
It could all just be perception. Maybe. Most of my experiences as a Hispanic have been pretty shit. Have gone into shops and had guards follow me, or pretend like they aren't scoping me out. Fuck, I just wanted to get some pepto. House sat for a friend who lived in a predominantly white neighborhood. I was excited to be in a new place. Couldn't enjoy it because whenever I went for a walk to just enjoy the place, others looked at me like I there mug a person.
I have my best to not judge others but...
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Can someone tell me why a girl is making plans with me to meet up then completely cancels on me like either that day or very close to the time we're supposed to.
She's also got 2 settings, hot or cold. Sometimes she's close and loving and great other times she's 1 word replies and distant. I don't have a clue what to do. I really fucking like this girl and the fact that she tells me that she loves me fucks with my brain. Any advice you can give me? (I really can't just stop talking to her we go to the same school but never see each other...
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If making plans doesn't work, make a plan where she can never refuse the offer. Make it where it's something that she REALLY wants to do. Or you could be spontaneous and do something together without making a plan. That way you can find that inbetween of cold and hot personalities.
Get rid of her dude, she's not worth it. I had the the same sort of girl, she kept me at a distance and she turned out to be a dud, totally not worth it.
>>16910443
She also keeps telling me that she wants to sleep with me, so I kinda want that as well first. But how do I get rid of her? I like her so fucking much it's crazy
