Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 757. page
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I hate how weak I am. Help me, /adv/
>hanging out with friends
>I'm a fairly skinny guy with large eyes so they sometimes call me 'Gollum' for a joke
>usually can hide how much this hurts my self esteem
>they have countless other names too
>none for them though, and if I come back with my own banter everyone goes dead silent then calls me an ass
>i make a joke
>get a few laughs
>one guy says 'okay then, Gollum'
>everyone laughs for about 3 minutes straight, start making fun of my bony hands, my skin, dig up all my insecurities
>leave when no one notices
>try not to cry
>call myself a pussy and hate myself more
>wonder what i do to make them do this to me, wonder why they can't just be nice to me. I never want to hurt them.
>they all constantly drag down my self esteem
>every few months, i'll call them cunts and stop speaking to them
>forget what happened a week later and come crawling back
>hate myself more each day
>no confidence
How do I leave the vicious cycle?
your friends sound like fags
>>17158981
They are, but I only admit it to myself during these bursts of depression and self loathing.
>>17158974
tell them to fuck off. walk out. never talk to them again. theyre not your friends.
After having sex with my boyfriend, I just want to be alone. How do I fix this?
He is big on post-orgasm cuddling, so I try to appease him, but all I really want is for us to go our separate ways, which makes me feel guilty.
I love him very much, I don't feel any sex-related shame, I'm female, and I am usually left feeling satisfied. I don't know why I feel this way, but I want to change it. We are both normally very affectionate and romantic towards each other.
>>17158957
Do you just enjoy the buzz?
Bump out of interest. Not op here, and I'm a guy, but I get the same thing. I lose a lot of interest in my partner post-orgasm, whether or not I'm dating them.
First thing that comes to mind is you not being sexually attracted to him.
>>17158962
Well it's sort of normal when guys do it.
What household chemicals will kill spiders on site in a matter of seconds?
Pic related.
styrene-butadiene seems to work really well.
>>17158923
it's synthetic rubber... commonly found on the bottom of shoes.
someone was supposed to ask wtf that is but it's taking too long.
>>17158910
Oh I've been there...
I would see roaches in the bathroom while I'd be taking a shit so I just started spraying the little fuckers with whatever was at hand (toilet cleaner, air freshener) and found that anything with bleached worked the best.
But, as we all know, roaches are fucking bulletproof so nothing I've found actually kills them but only stands to slow them down to a point where I can squash them.
Guys, need some help finding out what in the fuck this thing is in the picture. This thing was put onto my phone at work. Trying to figure out if it's a listening device of some sort.
>>17158895
its a telephone jack adaptor
>>17158903
Not OP, but what kind of port does the thick end fit into?
It's going into the cable that goes directly into the handset where I talk into.
I'm 20 years old right now and I'll be staying with my parents for the summer as I attend to a university during the school year. Right now I'm trying to get adjusted back home and my parents are harassing me about getting a job (which I'm working on) to the point where they expect me to spend 5 to 6 hours a day searching for a job or they will not let me out of the house. I would get a friend to pick me up from my place, but my parents have a GPS tracker on my phone so I can't really go anywhere without them knowing.
What can I do to make this easier on me or get my parents off my back more?
Jesus ur an adult, that sucks ass. Best advice? Hurry up and get a job lol
>>17158894
>my parents have a GPS tracker on my phone so I can't really go anywhere without them knowing.
Is your phone glued to you or something? Leave it at home
>>17158905
Lmao yeah I've applied to quite a few places and haven't heard back yet.
>>17158909
I would but then I would have to go through them calling each and every one of my friends asking them where I am (they pulled most of my contacts from my phone as well and I really only hang out with a handful of people).
I have my first job interview in 3 hours and I'm so nervous. I feel like vomiting. What should I do?
just try to distract yourself, if you can. there's really no way to get over those feelings until you've just gotten the thing over with. you'll be fine, your nervousness will give you extra energy, and if you don't get this job it's not the end of the world. good luck!
Masturbate. Like, actually. It helps.
>>17158901
Honestly this is a good idea
Should I take a nap
>>17158864
i hate naps they completely fuck me up for the rest of the day
don't
sure
Probably not
There was a period of a few months where my sleep schedule was consistently 5pm-8pm and then 1am-6am
it was awful
Please give me some advice, I'm desperate. This is my girlfriend, I've been with her for about 3 years. She use to be so sweet and loving but now she is insecure, slightly bitter and depressed. She has no one else but me, really. We moved in together 6 months ago and it has been a rough emotional rollercoaster, I love her and care about her but I can't be with her anymore I think it is unhealthy for both of us..how do I break up with her gently?
Tell her how you feel maybe. If she gets mad then definitely break it off. If not, maybe stick with her and see if it gets better. After all, you've been with her for 3 years
As much as we don't like to admit it, relationships are about give and take, and there is only so much a human can take.
At the end of the day you have to decide for yourself what is more important, her happiness (or lack thereof), or yours. Neither choice is incorrect. If she does anything as a result of you leaving her, it isn't your fault because she's become overdependant on you.
There is no way of breaking it off easily. I would perhaps consider voicing your feelings and having a proper discussion about it instead of just leaving flat out.
This happens time and time again. You can be a martyr, but why not move on and find somebody that loves you and themselves?
>>17158712
the 'best' way to break up with her is to have a plan for you, and have a plan for her. this may coincide with the end of a lease. but the best you can do is
>have a place for you to go and/or have a place for her to go
>plan for her to be out of town for a day, if not a whole weekend
>use her out of town time to get your stuff, and move out
>pick her up from wherever she is, take her to the shared house, and tell her you are moving out, already got your stuff, and cannot be with her anymore
if its your apartment you could stay and simply pack her stuff and bring it to her family. context is key here.
Apparently, all of my friends have stopped talking to me altogether, and I don't know why.
I feel horrible.
>>17158708
could be any number of reasons. we dont know. you are probably not the kind of person they want to talk to and a recent thing you did was the tipping point.
sucks to suck. you might not be entirely in the wrong. might be a chance to reflect and grow. or it might be a chacne to find people more in line with you
In my experience, whenever people complain about this kind of issue there's a very good reason why.
Maybe some self-reflection might help. Or you know, just straight up ask them instead of letting them ignore you.
>>17158708
I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you, but you will never know why unless and until you reach out to them. This is the first step out.
I need help dealing with jealous.
My GF made this friend in her work. They became very close. He fell for her but she turned him down and keep their friendship. They talk casually everyday online (is not hours long... But she use her cellphone and he is always talking to her). This is the first time in 7 years that i feel jealous and don't know how to deal with this. She say she loves me. And i believe it. I just feel.... I don't know. I just feel very insecure and it drives me mad. I feel that i need to compete with him and i don't feel secure enough. She has gone to his house (they both like anime) and to movies, but this is a behavior that she have with many people beside him and i have never had any problerm with it. I know this is wrong, but i can't control it. I feel that now he is her best friend, not me. Please help.
>>17158699
we tend to compartmentalize our relationships.
you are the most important man in her life, and if some other person approaches you feel like all she might have for you is the sexual aspect of your relationship, and you fear she will transfer that to him.
I have a similar issue with my boss. not sexually, but i see him as a father figure / mentor, and he clearly looks at me as the 'mentee' if you will. we are extremely close. and i do have an internal jealousy when i see that he is scheduled to have lunch with another young man. he is a large father figure and actually adopted three kids who didnt have a father.
in your case its a little rougher because romantic relationships are widely believed to only have room for one and he DID show an interest in her. sure you can trust her, but can you trust him to give up? can you trust this stranger who DID try to take your place not to slowly be waiting for the right chance to make her his?
you arent entirely in the wrong here.
Ah geez. I'd start packing, OP.
You should really talk to her, and put your foot down though. Tell her you don't think it's wise for her to become so close with somebody who clearly has romantic feelings for her when she's already in a relationship. Tell her that it's disrespectful to the person your with. Don't manipulate her, but let her know that if she plans to continue this behavior, you're going to leave her because you feel that she wants to be with him more than you.
It's not your fault, OP. This shit happens. This is life, it likes to fuck with us. You've got to just roll with the punches, it'll all work out.
Do yourself a favor though, and don't believe her when she tries to tell you that everything is okay. It's actions that make history, not words.
Most people here are probably going to tell you some variation of your girl not respecting you and you having to assert yourself. Sometimes the best way to assert yourself is by being comfortable with what's happening.
Listen man you guys have been going out for 7 years and she turned him down. She does this with others yet you feel jealous of this one in particular because he likes her. There are boundaries - she should be capable of defending those boundaries but if not for example he gets grabby and she does nothing you 1. Tell him to knock it off and 2. Tell her to do a better job
People are so scared of being hurt they sabotage future opportunities for themselves. You wont be cucked (as most would say here) if she cheats, you can only be cucked if you let yourself feel that way. If she cheats she wasnt worth your time and you can move on with your life with little to no emotional pain.
But if you don't trust your girl then there's no point in being in a relationship with her, no matter how amazing she is in other ways. This is a personal problem that can only be fixed with being exposed and becoming gradually comfortable. My gf has lots of male friends, I'm sure most of them would love to bone her, even some of my mutual friends.
I'm secure enough to know that she won't and if she does I can get rid of her in a heartbeat.
It is said to be better to have tried and failed than to have never tried, but remember a time when you regret trying?
>>17158669
generally no. i think the saying is meant to shine light on the situations that people act like big deals but arent.
there is no reason not to go ask out that girl, or whatever.
if its dangerous and has real world stakes, consider the options. but the saying is not meant for like 'see if you can land a back flip off your roof' and anything like that.
>>17158669
All of my interactions with women can be summed up like that.
>>17158669
I dont think so. There is no time I haven't gained either physically, emotionally, or morally by participating in life. It's been worth it every time, even in failure.
How the FUCK do you hold conversations with people, especially over text?
I have no idea how to conversate. There's scores upon scores of cute girls that have approached me, gotten my number, but only received disappointment because I don't know how the fuck to talk.
Sometimes it takes me several fucking days to come up with a response to somebody, but then once they respond it's the same game all over again
>>17158639
>especially over text
you dont. text is meant for quick little interactions. some girls make it possible to conversate sure, but its not recommended. if you are texting a girl you are close enough to ask her on a date. use texting to check in once a day until said date.
so ask her on a date.
when its other stuff just say 'im not much of a texter' when you talk to them irl
the word is converse, not conversate
Honestly texting is pretty boring until you're good enough friends to have something to talk about. Once they give you the number, use it to schedule coffee or something, establish similar interests and then you can text about stuff you actually both like.
Ex: have you heard the new ______ album?? who's your favorite character in ______? Hows that thing with your mom goin?
I need to know which game would be the absolute *WORST* game on Steam, by reviews . This Thing needs to be the WORST ever!
Im going to buy copies of this game and hand them out to friends as a joke.
the traditional awful gift game is Bad Rats.
dunno if it's the worst tho tbf
>>17158623
Team Fortress is one of the worst. I got it for free and I still feel I paid too much.
>>17158623
Imscared if you want to fuck their pc up or can always go with that shit retribution 1% game or big rigs racing
My GF bruises so fucking easily it's not even funny. To make things worse, she's into rough stuff, and loves it when i kiss her neck, both of which bruise the shit out of her. Anything past gentle kissing and she gets hickeys. And living at home, this is an issue as she doesn't want her mother to see. A few times she's made this clear to me, and I keep accidentally giving her hickeys anyway, which leaves her understandably frustrated.
Save for keeping my mouth and hands off of her neck completely, how can I minimize the bruising?
>>17158532
save the rougher stuff for areas where her clothes will cover it up. inner thighs are my personal favorite
>>17158544
>>17158544
I mean do you just slap them or what? She really likes hair pulling, choking, etc and a lot of rougher breast play but I've never considered the thighs
>>17158596
just give her hickeys on her inner thighs. it's cute, easy to do it in a rough way, and it'll be something only she can see at home
My girlfriend laid those four soul crushing words on me today.
Some background info:
>Currently 22
>Dated for four years
>Started dating in High School
>Gf was on birth control when we started dating
>Dropped birth control about a year ago.
So...yeah I need some advice.
My girlfriend and I sort of broke up today. She said she needs a break. She owes me some money and has some of my belongings, which she said she'll return to me or I can get them.
She messaged me at work saying that it's not working and that we need to talk. I left work to meet up with her at a local lake.
We've been going through a severe rough patch for some time. About a year ago, we had sex and it went too far in what I thought was a humorous way. I accidentally stuck it in her ass. She didn't say no at first, but after I thrusted a few times she told me to stop and that she doesn't want me sleeping over that night.
This is just a preface. What I thought was humorous at the time really scarred her. She told me she was essentially violated and that she wasn't sure if she could forgive me, even though my apologies were sincere. We moved past it eventually, had regular sex, everything was good.
In the past two months we've been having sex multiple times a week. Great sex, no complaints, we both orgasm multiple times each time.
But here's where things go wrong. My gf is very big on "energy" and "aura" etc. I do massage therapy, and I give her massages often. Usually, the massages lead to sex. The issue is not always. She says sometimes I massage her for too long and she can feel me "taking" her energy instead of giving it. So I started practicing knowing when to stop massaging at the right moment if she's not in the mood for sex.
But a few days ago I was on mushrooms and got way too into the massage. I took so much of her energy that she sat up and told me that our relationship is failing. She doesn't feel a spark with me anymore, and she doesn't know what to do.
Pt2 V
So today like I said she met up with me at the lake and told me she wants to take a break. it was very hard for her, she cried a lot and wouldn't let go of me when I asked her if she wanted a hug.
I went back to work and messaged her an hour or two later saying how foolish and immature I've been, how I miss holding her hand and falling asleep next to her, waking up and seeing her in the morning.
She said This is all coming too late, I have no energy left to put into this relationship, I need a break.
I said I understand, and now here I am.
So...break advice: Do I cut contact, just wait for her to decide what she needs? I told her everything I had to say, I don't want to come off as desperate or dependent on her.
I'm supposed to meet up with her soon to grab my stuff. What should I say, what should I do, how should I act? Should I message her to get my stuff, or continue the no contact rule and wait for her to let me know?
Thank you in advance.
>>17158494
>she wants a break
>she's big into "energy" and "aura"
She's retarded.
And she's already set up somebody else to take your place if she's isn't fucking him already.
Cut contact and move on. You're at the beginning of your adult life.
>>17158494
>yeah I need some advice.
Protip - if you need advice learn to lead off with a fecking question. You ask questions like a girl and by that I mean you don't ask questions but tell a sob story.
Also, you sound like a dick (that accidentally buttfucking her is gold) and she sounds like a fruit loop.
