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is 26 too late to get my life together or am I just being paranoid?
>>17160446
Nope. You've got your whole life ahead of you
Nah, you can still turn it around. I'm the same age as you and going through something similar.
>>17160446
No idea man. Everyone will tell it's never to late, that you shouldn't give up.
Pesonally, I keep trying new things, meetig people, and doing hundreds of thousands of sit-ups and push ups. Because i've been told that is what i have to do to find happyness. Regular physical exercise, meeting new people, etc... Right? I mean why would people tell you to do something that doesn't work. Except it doesn't (for me at least). But i digress. I'm likely too far down the depression pit.
I think whatever age you are you should try and fix your life.
What do u do when u walk in on your hubs having playtime with himself?
Didn't you post a more elaborate version of this earlier? Went out shopping and left him to watch the kids or whatever?
Do whatever you're both comfortable with. If you're upset, or he's upset, take a bit of time to yourselves to cool off then come back and talk about it with a clear head.
Personally I'd probably shut the door and go do something else. But that's based on my boyfriend being worried about what I think. Even though I told him as a 4chan user myself, finding out that he's into traps and furries is 4chan normie tier.
>>17160441
No didn't see that post otherwise I probably would have posted this question there. I couldn't walk away... I started laughing because I scared the cum out of him rofl I was in stitchs. He was super embarrassed, I tried to reasure him that it was ok but my laughing didn't help the situation. Oops.
>>17160480
>>17160441 (You) (OP)
No didn't see that post otherwise I probably would have posted this question there. I couldn't walk away... I started laughing because I scared the cum out of him rofl I was in stitchs. He was super embarrassed, I tried to reasure him that it was ok but my laughing didn't help the situation. Oops.
Is there a future for people wanting to study "product design"?
I have a degree in something literary and I don't want to be a teacher.
I am not the best at maths but if I'm motivated by what I'm doing, I'll get there eventually.
I can draw very well and I'm creative so that's something that really interests me.
Your thoughts on product design?
I don't know ANYTHING about product design, but presume either they freelance or they work for dedicated product design companies or in house as a department within a larger company.
I'd imagine based on the world I've worked in that freelance is going to come with the challenges that running your own business entails though I can't think who your customer base would be. They'll either be so huge they have in house design, or outsource to medium dedicated firms, or they'll hire you on a temporary basis bypassing your business entirely, or they'll be so small that it'll be pissy work and you'll have to network like a bitch to keep enough clients to keep money coming in.
I imagine dedicated companies will have all the challenges of working any other office job in a fake creative environment with all the usual politics and design meetings and pitches and hangers on and inflated ego.
I imagine working in house for huge respected brands is highly competitive, would require relocation and I suspect lots of them are using temporary contracts and outsourcing what in the modern world is becoming a unnecessary cost. I'd imagine that the pay is average except at the top levels.
Maybe there are emerging markets with prototyping factories and small scale manufacturers who take on limited runs looking to offer additional services to their clients, but I imagine most of these are in China. You might be able to find a way into this, but you'd have to have the skills of running your own relentlessly self promoting brand and image to network to be of value to them.
But what do I know? I'm just extrapolating based on my own work history. I've a friend who is a 'brand/image' consultant. He has his own company. He is basically a massive salesman selling himself and the idea of what he could do. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, blame the implementation, take the money and run. It all seems image. Look like a big company. Impress smaller companies. Sell the idea of success.
>>17160432
Thanks for this very constructive reply.
So what do you do and how is it working for you?
Also, what if you worked for a small business that isn't international?
>>17160443
Studied programming and business system analysis. Unless you worked for a company with in house development teams (they nearly all bring in freelance or dedicated consultancy) you had to have your own business or work as part of a dedicated firm.
If you work for a dedicated firm you get paid averagely and you get all the usual shit that working in an office involves. But you only get pressure from your part of the project and implementation and you can specialise and there is safety in only having ownership of the part that you are the expert in.
If you work for a tiny firm or for yourself you've got to find the clients, put together a pitch, sell the pitch, develop, implement, train and support the product. You've got to have so many skills which relate to basically being a good salesperson.
I imagine it is the same for people who work in product design. It seems similar for my friend who works in brand design. He first has to find someone who needs to be sold the benefit of his services, the value of which are determined by how well he can sell himself and he has to pitch and produce and implement. The creative work is a tiny part of the overall work.
I branched out into audio system design and development, sound reinforcement, acoustic design, digital sound processing. Not sure how it happened, but it kind of did.
I mean, what do you want to be doing? Producing prototypes? Physically producing them? Designing digitally or on paper? Do you have to cost them up? Sell against competitive designs based on features and benefits compared to unit price? Do you have a love of a particular product or industry which would give you insight in that area?
I know a girl who specialises in designing clothes from sustainable materials. She gets her manufacturing done elsewhere and sells through local and online. It doesn't pay all the bills.
I know a girl who designs and manufacturers furniture. She sells through galleries. It doesn't pay all the bills.
Whenever I drink heavily, I manage to make a dumbass out of myself. I start talking about shit that is super embarrassing, and the worst part is I don't remember it.
My 21st birthday is in two weeks and me and a bunch of friends are going bar hopping. He is bringing along a couple girls that I kind of know, they're super hot and I might hook up with one of them.
How do I keep myself from acting like a moron when I drink heavily? I know the obvious answer is "Don't drink so much" but it's gonna be my 21st and my friends will inevitably pressure me to go super fucked yo because it's a special day.
Does this happen to anyone else?
>>17160393
Say something like your dad promised you an expensive car if you didn't drink at all on that night (or limited yourself to 1 or 2 beers).
Personally don't really drink much, just cant get used to the taste and its too expensive. Only drink when I go out - will have a beer and thats about it.
>>17160393
>>17160450
this might work actually.
or just talk to your friends ahead of time and let them know that you'd like to not embarrass yourself on your birthday. so while you are looking forward to having a few drinks with them, you're going to be pacing yourself to avoid any bad situations, and you'd like them to please not try to encourage you to over-drink.
if you don't trust them to respect that (or if they're the kind of "friends" who will do their damndest to get you shitfaced anyway against your wishes, just because you're just so fucking funny when you're drunk), don't go out with them.
First of all if you let someone pressure you into drinking (or doing anything for that matter) you're a fucking faggot. Simply tell them that you'll drink how much you feel like drinking and be done with that. You can't control what you're going to do when drunk, you can only control how drunk you'll get.
Making a fool out of yourself is not so bad, at least when you're out with your friends, but if you're going out with girls and you want to hook up with one of them you obviously shouldn't get shitfaced.
So don't get shitfaced you fucking degenerate.
So after working simple part time jobs off and on with being NEET for 3 years I finally got off my ass and landed a decent paying job a few months back. The problem is that now I work 6 days a week, 10-12 hours a week. I feel so exhausted after work that I don't want to do anything I used to, no tv, no music, no games. I just sit around the house or sleep as much as possible. It was just announced that we will be working these hours possibly for another 4 months.
what can I do to make this situation more bearable?
Get used to it
Really thats it
>Go from being a NEET to working
>I don't like it
>Help me like it /adv/
Welcome to the real world. Thanks for contributing. Now man the fuck up and do what the rest of us do every single fucking day.
>I feel so exhausted after work that I don't want to do anything I used to, no tv, no music, no games.
Aww, poor baby. Can't work and have a NEET life too? Funny that.
>>17160360
Quit.
Is it weird to go to concerts alone?
>>17160282
Weird to who? Who's checking?
People go to movies alone all the time.
>>17160288
Basically this. No one will notice either way, but no there's nothing inherently weird about seeing a show on your own
>>17160282
No.
Go. Talk to the people next to you in line or in the venue. Enjoy.
My fiancee wants to join the LDS church. The Mormon missionaries came to her doorstep and talked to her, and she's been meeting with them and learning about the church and its beliefs. I've started coming with her and going to church events and talking to the missionaries. The more I meet with them, the more of a cultish vibe I get from this organization, and the more scared I am that my fiancee's conversion could ruin my relationship with her. I'm familiar with cults and how they work. I'm not a part of any religion, but I'm open to the idea of God. However, this isn't like other branches of christianity I've been acquainted with. It's more like a few self help groups with destructive tendencies I've nearly been sucked into. Here are some things I've observed:
>they use love bombing to make their church look attractive and make you feel welcome, like you're part of a family
>they withhold information that would make the church seem crazy to a complete outsider, like that god is an ascended man who comes from a star-base called Kobol, and that everyone can become a god when they die. When I asked one of the missionaries about God being a human and how that contradicted the bible I was simply told that it was a mystery and that we couldn't have all the answers because god's plan was too vast for us to know
>they withhold information that would make Joseph Smith or any of the church's subsequent 'prophets' look like charlaitans, of which exists plenty
>the missionaries will tell you that the only way to know the truth about the book of Mormon is to pray and trust your feelings, not to think critically
>the church wants you to convert on their time and pressure you to start obeying their commandments and work towards being baptised quickly, my fiancee basically drank the koolaid on this one and is planning on being baptized in a week, even though she seems to know little about the church outside of what the missionaries have discussed with her
I'd suggest a more moderate church. They can actually be pretty pleasant. The more fundamentalist ones the lean towards cult mentality are pretty damaging in my opinion. I don't attend a church myself, I was exposed to a number of them and didn't really like the human element, the politics to it all. I'm happy as a hermit believer
>behavior control is emphasized, they want to have daily contact with you to make sure you're not drinking alcohol or fucking coffee, or having sex, similar to what Ive seen in cult-y self help groups
And most disturbing to me
>the church teaches that to achieve the highest level in the afterlife, your spouse also has to be Mormon and you have to do a ceremony in a temple
At first I supported her enthusiasm for this because I was happy that my fiancee found a church and she could get some community out of it and learn to better herself from it and maybe I could to. But I don't want to be part of a church that requires me to blindly believe that this guy from the 19th century is a prophet chosen by god to restore the one true church, and that there is a living prophet who can change canon and tell me what to do with my life. Hell, this is even making me question if christianity in general is believable. I'm scared she will get sucked into this and it will become more important than me, and she'll be pressured away from me because I'm deciding not to be part of this church. And I dont know how to talk to her about it.
I dont think the missionaries or anyone else are bad people for believing this stuff, but I don't think it's correct. I see no proof that it isnt 100% made up, and plenty of proof to the contrary.
>>17160278
>>17160305
Protip: she's being sucked into this so easily because she's unsatisfied with her life (this possibly means you). Be a fucking man and tell her that you're not joining and neither are you. If she chooses the cult over you, then you dodged a bullet.
I'm sick of all this nu-male "I can't control my woman" bullshit.
Is it ok to let my girlfriend become a phone sex operator? Or is it cheating?
As far as the whore level goes, it's pretty low on the bar. I wonder how much one makes 2bh. I'm a guy but it kind of makes my skin crawl thinking of the gross, perverted, lonely men that call those numbers
naw that's fucked mate. expect problems.
>>17160262
$9.30 but she gets to stay home with our kids
All right, I just got an interview lined up at a place that is notorious for having group interviews. The manager on the phone didn't say it was gonna be a group interview but I am expecting it. I have had interviews before but never a group one, how do I survive ? What do I do ?
also no prior work experience so i'm trying to tie this job down and get it.
Be energetic, give eye contact, fake it all if you have to. I'm the most pleasant person I've ever been in interviews. If it's a large company they might have some company vision or goal which you should research online and get familiar with. Since you have zero work experience you'll want to focus on your basic strengths and some examples of those strengths
>>17160249
I don't know specifically how to be energetic or if I am doing it correctly, I always keep an upbeat tone that isn't too shallow or bored and I always give eye contact. As for experience I only have it in labor I have never really had an official job. Do I disclose that to them ?
It'd mention that in your resume/cv anyways wouldn't it? You did labour work, but it wasn't considered a job?
I can't for the life of me eat healthy foods like vegetables or most fruits. I just can't stomach most of it. What's the best way for someone who hasn't eaten healthy for the majority of their life to get into the habit?
>>17160239
Try making smoothies. If you mkix the right healthy things together it can come out tasting good.
your sense of taste has already been fucked by artificial flavours/sweeteners.
theres nothing you can do other than cook creatively, force yourself and pray that you somehow manage to restore your natural taste again.
>>17160272
It's quite easy though. And after a few years it's even the other way round. Can't have artificial shit in my food and hate McDonald's etc to death.
Just get started jackass and add lots of spices. There are tons of them and they taste A LOT better than artificial flavours.
I'm being watched bros, what should i do about it ?
Get naked and be really obnoxiously naked
>>17160223
Wave and say "Hi!"
>run
A bit of background about me: I'm a 25 year old woman, who is in a happy secure semi-open marriage. By semi-open I mean in our time together we have had threesomes as well as given each other permission under certain circumstances to get involved with a different person.However, we always ask each other first when it comes to sex. A bit of a unique situation has come up and I'd like your advice.
>went to a music festival with a female friend
>ended up rooming and driving with a bunch of guys I didn't know (She was friends with one and I was acquaintances with him.)
>over the course of the weekend get to know the guys better
>one in particular was pretty damn cool and there was definitely sexual tension
>left my phone back home like an idiot so there wasn't a way for me to get in contact with my husband to discuss this
>didn't have sex, but talked a lot and according to my friend I was flirting a lot (I'm honestly still horrible at knowing what is and what isn't)
>end of the weekend he gives me a hug and says we have to see each other next year for the same festival
>go home talk to husband about everything
>decide we are going to open our relationship up fully, so we can take advantage of situations like this
So /adv/ here's my question, should I contact this guy? He lives across the state and knows I'm married, but is it pointless because the weird weekend tension is gone? He didn't give me his number, but I could get it, or would it be better to have a mutual friend offer my number to him if he wants it? Is that weird? He is in a relationship too, but from what he told me they only stay together for their kid. I've never gotten in the middle of something like that... bad idea?
My husband says either way its my choice if I want to bother with it.
I think it would just be fun to finish up what we started. Your thoughts?
You're a cuck, your husband is a cuck. Cuck yourselves
>>17160193
Happier than you I'm sure.
>>17160198
I wouldn't go that far. I'm cuck-free
Yes, I know I'm a beta faggot baby ass kid. For a austist 20 y/o who still lives with his parents, I still act like a chump. Deal with it and give me some fucking advice.
So I was "that kid" growing up. I suppose I still am. I've been made fun of threwout my whole school life, and, because of my situation, I'm still living in the same location. Whenever I go to a public place, I occasionally see people that would hate on me. They'll give me twisted looks occasionally, or flip me off or something. I usually hide from highly public places because of this.
That's small fry compared to this. There was this ONE KID who bullied me to all hell. He had the entire school on his side, even though he was an ass. Almost like a fucking disney villian, he got away with....a plethora of things that he shouldent of. Even the school staff sided with him sometimes, because of his "severe autism" or something, I don't even know.
This kid (who's name is Mark. No need for anonymity here) abused me. He had his peers on his side, and, being the small school that it was, he had most students making fun of me too. Spreading rumors, ect. It got so bad to the point where I refused to go to school, and even beyond that, I was still made fun of in public. I stopped leaving the house entirely. This was 4 or so years ago.
Cont. 1/2
Cont. 2/2
Parents got worried, eventually sent me to a wilderness camp a few states away. That wilderness camp transitioned into a monkey house school thing. It was awful, and lasted nearly 2 years, but that's beside the point.
After a few transitions, I'm living with my Mom again (parents divorced recently, me being the main culprit), I'm still afraid to go into crowded places for long periods of time, and generally live antisocially. I've been diagnosed unofficially with acute PTSD, of the social veriety....dunno if that's a thing, bit it's what my therapist mentions occasionally.
Today, in therapy, I was told that my Mom spotted Mark, and decided to approach him. She introduced herself, and, as far as I know, made it apparent that I'm still living in the same location he is. I broke down during the therapy session and ran to the restroom, bawling my eyes out. How could my own Mom break this barrier that I've kept for so many years? I haven't been able to talk to her all day. The few friends I have all want to help, but nothing can undo what's been done....I'm scared of my past, /adv/. I almost want to revert back to my old self....staying inside the house, cowering for days....What do I do?
Sorry if none of this makes sense. It's probobly full of broken english, but my body and mind are failing too much to type properly right now.
your disorder is causing you to flip the reality, the fact being, everyone grows up and forgets
every path you have been through defines who you are, doesnt mean you are a pathetic loser from the past but a person who have learnt to accept it and moved on with his life
maybe soon you will realise your parents are just strangers that you got bloodties to, and would want to see you healthy and happy before you are kicked out from home
just vent it all out, maybe find a place and scream your lungs out, as you have not relaxed your body in ages
>>17160179
>yeah i know
>DEAL WITH IT
wow, even when trying to be humble you are still a pretentious egomaniac.
>give me some fucking advice
go fuck yourself.
Ok, this is kind of completely fucked-up.
My girlfriend is borderline, depressed, and all the shit it comes with. I know I'm crazy, but I love her so much I'll do anything.
The thing is, she told me she needs to feel pain. She like it and she feels relieved. She want that I take her wrists and tighten them hard.
I did this a number of time, but now she wants me to do this without her asking me. The thing is, I have no fucking idea what to do.
I don't know shit about depression and people who are hurting themself. I have no idea what they feels like, when it could be appropriate for me to do this to her.
Any people here could explain me a little these self-desctrutives mechanisms? I know It's impossible for me to help to fix her in any way, all I want to do is to be with her.
no one can really say why your gf wants to hurt herself because her experience with her mental illness is unique to only her.
but i can say for myself and others, sometimes pain is just what you seek because it elicits an emotional response. and when you're depressed, pretty much every emotion is hard to come by. inflicting pain just makes you feel something for once. some people also see it as a punishment they deserve, or a coping mechanism to make themselves feel pain as opposed to another hurtful emotion.
your girlfriend is a person who probably would benefit from professional help if she doesn't already see someone. you'll send yourself down a dark path if you continue to do the things she asks you to do.
Stop indulging her with that shit. As someone who has struggled with depression probably longer than your gf has been alive, I can tell you there are ways of dealing with it without self harm. Look at alternative forms of calm, like meditation or get her into therapy
>>17160178
It's the reason people cut themselves. The (warped) thinking goes like this: "I'm in emotional/mental pain and there is no visible cause of it. If I give myself physical pain I can see the cause-and-effect of that, and so agt least it makes some sense."
How soon is too soon to start asking for particular shifts at a fast food job?
I'm in my third week at Five Guys and having me work the closing shift is NOT working out for everyone. I clean way too slowly and end up fucking everyone over. If no one has complained about it yet I'm sure it's coming.
I've been wanting to ask the manager if I can just work the noon/afternoon shifts (I already mostly do anyway) but this is my first job and I dunno if it'd be rude or effective.
>>17160115
its rude, but not for the reasons you are thinking. its rude because instead of rising to the challenge and getting better / faster at cleaning, you are insisting on the easier shift, where you arent required to do that work.
>>17160115
I'm going to say this in order to try to help you. You better try to develop a sense of urgency at work. If you're too slow on the closing shift, who the fuck wants to work with you during the day? Spoiler: No one will.
I know you probably are asking yourself, "WHY SHOULD I WORK HARD AT THIS WHEN THEY PAY ME GARBAGE?" You have to start somewhere unfortunately.
Start busting ass at work and they'll give you any shift you want eventually.
slightly off-topic: why does every fast food place have that one shift leader who's a total fucking nazi for no apparent reason
what motivates these people
