Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 415. page
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For reasons I will not debate here, I am having a sex change. I was born and raised a girl and had a vague father whom my mother shooed out when I was 14 and who died a few years later because nobody was looking after his self-destructive ass. I have no supportive male figures in my life who would have their shit together or any kind of interest or resources for an extra burden.
Is there anything one ought to know about being a man that you can't learn from TV?
Don't worry about it, you're not going to be a man anyways.
>>17272598
/thread
>>17272598
This is the kind of support I have readily available in my life.
In December I left Northern Illinois to move to Tennessee with my mom. I have no family besides her and she has none besides me and wanted me to come down so I've been down here and I feel like there is nothing for me. The women are either married, in long term relationships or hick as fuck/ugly. I am 22 years old and I know its probably time I moved out. I was moved out for 2 years in illinois but moved back to help her with the move and stuff. She wants me to stay here but I sort of want to go back up to illinois. I have no purpose or direction though. I was at school to be a personal trainer, was there 2 years in illinois and decided to take the ACSM test, blew 750 bucks on it for retests and shit and ended up flunking out. Then I had a shoulder surgery from an injury that hasnt healed quite fully yet. But I wanted to move back to get an apartment atleast because I know there are people my age and maybe go back to school up there and talk to my main teacher and tell him what happened and see if we can figure something out so I can take a test to become a trainer. RIght now I am a server at a country club, old people talk shit to me all day basically. I just need to find my way. Should I stay here? Or do you think theres better opportunity in illinois for me. I currently have 0 friends here and dont know where to meet them. I don't smoke or drink so i'm "boring" to most people my age apparently.
tldr: Is there more opportunity for a happy life in illinois than tennessee?
>>17272592
any advice?
>>17272592
bymp
>>17272592
You obviously want to move so what's stopping you? Is your mom super old or something?
Hey 4channers, I like a gal but I don't know how to talk to her, tips?
*talk to her like you talk to your fellow guy friends
*go to easy subjects like what you are currently doing (if you are both at school for example talk about some teacher idk)
*don't try hard to be funny, hopefully jokes will pop up in your mind in the right moment
*dont think of her as someone you can potentially have sex with while you are talking to her
Don't be autistic.
Go further in questions, ask about Shit that matters. If it's too hard, it means she's dull as fuck and you need to move on.
I am attracted to underage girls. I don't want to be. I don't want to have sex with or otherwise exploit what I'm attracted to because it's wrong. What resources are helpful for suppressing these urges? I'm not frightened that I'll hurt someone or anything, but I just want to know what options I have available. I can't speak to a therapist because I'm afraid they'll "turn me in" for a crime I've never committed and have no intention of committing.
>>17272505
Fapping to lolis on b doesn't make you a pedo and it's probably legal unless you live in a fascist shithole like China or America.
Attraction to pubescent bodies is pretty natural. Studies found it to be more common than all out pedophilia. People used to get married to 14 year-olds, shitskins still do. It's just a taboo because it's illegal.
You shouldn't speak to a therapist tho. It's never a good idea to mention anything potentially criminal to anyone who may be legally obligated to report it or process it. You'd be better off talking to a priest (this isn't a priest pedo joke. aw, fuck it, it is.)
How underage are we talking
>>17272507
12-13
it's not that young right?
>be me
>meet girl whos friend of a friend
>date for about two years
>find out about her past sex exploits
>try to be a cuck and look passed it but cant
>break up with her because of it but lie and say some shitty excuse
>she knows its a lie and is begging me for an honest discussion
So I do it. Shes really hopeful this is just a phase and we'll work out, but if I was honest with her I think itd be really devastating for her to hear what I have to say about how incompatible we are due to how she treats sex.
We havent been sexually active and when we talked about her past she says she's come to appreciate why I dont sleep around, but you cant undo the past.
But obviously I cant say that to her. I dont want to be a dick and just cut contact because I do care about her, I just cant be with her.
Suggestions?
we all have our flaws, so just get over it. Simple as that.
Having a hoe past doesnt make her less loveable, like who even came up with this shitty concept of being a slut or whatever. Just do what you want to do and dont let yourself guide by dumb social standarts.
You love her, right? Then get over it like a man and accept it as her past.
>>17272453
why haven't the two of you had sex? Two years and she hasn't wanted to fuck? Seems you guys would already have had the conversation.
Anyway, I wouldn't tell her the real reason but would maintain you don't see a future together and best to end it now so she can move on and so can you.
>>17272460
I dont want to be with a slut. Its a trait I find repulsive in a partner.
If a girl slaps me, why shouldn't I punch her in the throat in "self defense"?
Disproportionate response
It's way more embarrassing for them if you just hold them down
Why would a girl be slapping you in the first place? Why not remove yourself from the situation instead of escalating it?
Pic unrelated
So I'm a vidya addict.
I have a lot of real life goals but don't commit to them because I sit at my pc for 16 hours a day and then oversleep to wake up at 3PM and repeat the cycle. I've tried to cut down but I lack the will power. I;m just living in my comfort zone but I know that I don't want this kind of life. My life can merely be called life. I play the most cancerous vidya which are the biggest time eaters (LoL, Dota, CS, HS).
What do I do? I know the problem but don't act on it. Does anyone have any advice?
Red pill me, anons.
>>17271837
motivation is sort of inherent. it comes within. the self help books about motivation sell well cuz everyone wants more motivation, but unlike books like 'the secret' you never really hear of one becoming so immensely popular.
motivation is intrinsic. unless it is external motivation. that motivation can come from needing to make sure your kids are taken care of, or pressure from your parents, or even the desire not to be whipped by your master.
so if you can't surrender control to a parent, friend, or roommate, then ur fucked.
im fortunate enough to have a baseline of motivation to build from. if you can find it in you, do it. its as simple as making a list of what you want to do, and taking the first step today.
my advice? only allow yourself to play story oriented games, the kind with endings. if you are playing and mmorpg like LoL (at least i think it is i dont know cuz i rarely play video games) then those eat up all of your time. theres no reason to ever stop. its just constant leveling up.
when i was younger i played runescape. i kept convincing myself the game would start to be fun when i got X skill level or Y new ability. but it was just the same thing over and over again. so i gave up and never really went back to mmorpgs.
>>17271856
>making a list of what you want to do
I have done that many times, but it seems the motivation just vanishes in a few days.
I don't have anyone to push me so I have to do it myself. I just don't want to be that "money or women" motivated prick though. Though I get motivated when I think of or see women.
>>17271892
good luck then man.
How do I make a guy lose weight?
A guy I know has a crush on me, but he is on the heavy side and it is the only major turn off for me. I am not superficial, I do not want him to have muscles or go to the gym every day for the rest of his life, however, I am skinny and I simply prefer it when guys are in normal to slim weight range. I have been a bit heavier than I am now too but I lost weight.
How do I go about bringing this up? Should I tell one of our mutual friends that the weight is the only problem and maybe they can have a guy to guy?
>>17271741
you are a terrible and shallow person.
>>17271748
It's cool that you perceive things like that but it doesn't really solve my problem.
I am in the exact same situation, great girl, so easy to get along with and her family is awesome, however she is kind of chunky, what do.
How the fuck do you measure your dick correctly? Is bone pressed actually the correct way? Because it seems like ceating
Why do you need to know this information? You can't make it shorter, you can't make it longer. The girl doesn't ask for how big it is. Nobody asks for how big it is. Nobody gives a fuck.
>>17271387
Not OP, but I assume it's to compare it to the reported average size.
>>17271387
What kind of stupid unhelpful post is this? And no, you are wrong.
In school I was pinned as the "successful" kid. Everything came easy to me. I was good looking, popular, charismatic, smart. I'd top classes, get girls, and people would tell me that one day I'd be a doctor or a TV personality or a rich investor or something.
Well, long story short, somewhere along the way I burned out, and I've spent the last six months after college living in my parents' basement working one shift a week at a bar.
How do I regain my old motivation? How do I get a job that isn't just a job, but is a career? I don't know if my parents are wilfully denying that I have a problem, or that they just don't want to pressure me, or they don't know how to help, but every time I ask them what's wrong with me I just get the standard "There's nothing wrong with you! You're so intelligent and smart and charismatic! Everything will work out just fine! There's nothing wrong with taking it easy for a while after all the hard work you've put in!" They just don't understand that I was so set on getting into a good college and getting good grades that by the time I finished it I hadn't given any thought to what would happen next. Now the rug has been pulled from under me and I'm freefalling, and I feel absolutely worthless without anything to set my mind to.
Kill yourself, cucc
>>17271328
Thanks for the help
>>17271255
You're similar to me. Graduated one of the top of my class, top 5 ranked university globally. Took me 2 years to find a real job, and I even moved to a new continent to find it.
Nothing you can do but keep trying. Start right at the bottom of the career ladder. Look for a job that you can do for a couple years which will give you a better shot at landing the job you actually want.
If you've lost motivation then nothing can help you. Suck it up.
My girlfriend has given blowjobs two of my friends in my main friend group in the past. Each occurring several years ago (6 and 2 respectively). She has only actually fucked me though outside of a long term relationship
Would you be concerned about this matter/care at all? Because I didn't really think about it until now, I'm starting to feel a little uncomfortable. Sort of in a little bit of a thought loop.
Did it occur while you were in a relationship? If not, it really depends on what you're comfortable with I guess. You can't make her unsuck their cocks. You either have to deal with it, or end the relationship if you're really that uncomfortable.
I really don't see why that should make you feel uncomfortable. It was long ago
>>17270650
Unless it happened while you were together there's not much of a reason to be uncomfortable.
Are there people who will go through a relationship just wanting sex from that person?
What would be the point of that? Why not be upfront about it?
1: Definitely.
2: Because if they were upfront, they wouldn't get the sex?
Such a simple question, and no answers.
t-thanks, /adv/
>>17273234
This.
>>17273236
>Such a simple question, and no answers.
No, I'd say you got your answer.
What's the word that means "knows what to do when appropriate?"
I think it starts with an I?
>>17273061
Uh, are you referring to initiative? I don't know.
>>17273061
integrity
>>17273065
That's it. Tip of tounge etc
Why do lesbians and women who try to act manly always try to be as violent, rude, and curse as much as possible?
Is that really how women see men? They are that much intimidated of us? LMAO
>>17273037
It depends on the person, not all macho looking lesbians behave exactly the same.
>>17273037
Same reason faggots act like drag queens sometimes.
They can act all they want, we know the truth
I'm female and by listening and interacting with other girls I think it's more because they want to be in men's position, not because they're necessarily afraid. They just want what they can't have. I use the word 'they' because I'm alright with Woman activities and don't care.
How do I get a life so cool I don't have to spend my free time fantasizing?
I wanna go on an adventure and shoot things and save the world
>>17273020
im lucky enough that my life is exciting. not marvel movie video game exciting, but a lot of the stuff i dreamed of doing as a kid im doing now.
join the army if thats what you want, but as soon as you hear army you'll cringe and be like 'THATS NOT SAIVNG THE WORLD' as if thats a real thing, and you know theres no magic fantasy adventure waiting for you.
even the paranormal adventures arent really glamour, you just end up with temporary brain damage til your boss performs an exorcism on you, then you go back to doing paperwork and catching ghosts in jars.
>>17273020
You cant.
I wish i was lying but this is why games exist.
>>17273026
mostly this. life can be exciting but its never going to be a little story book. you gotta remember in the story, the character isnt having fun. sometimes what you are enjoying is the characters darkest moment.
unlesss your playing sonic, hes the only character i know thats happy from start to finish.
most people in your position just write.
