Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1192. page
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is college worth it if you dont know what you want to do?
no,
>>16943897
I'm taking classes here and there and it's been really fun. Gets you gen ed credits and keeps your mind sharp for when you decide what you really want to do.
>>16943897
You can take two years of general education, getting a lot of requisites out of the way. If you haven't figured it out by then, then yes. It might be a waste of time and money.
I (23/f) have been hanging out at my love interests ' (31/m) house and spending the night with him every weekend for the past two months. We spend a good deal of our free time together as friends. As my friend, He's confided in me that he's not over a previous relationship, and hasn't slept with anyone in over a year. That he can't bring himself to do anything sexual without feelings getting involved.
Today, he made a move with me though. The first move. Which has sent my mind reeling. I stayed with him last night, and when we woke up, we moved close to each other. He started rubbing my waist where my underwear hit with his thumb. He said to "tell him if he goes too far. He doesn't want to do anything I don't want to do". Needless to say, things physically progressed. I've liked this guy for a while! I was really feeling it. The way he held me and gave me his first kiss sweetly on top of my head...it was great. Anyway, long story short, It got to the point where we decided to "go for it" and were trying to find protection. He found some, and I expressed my happiness but stated I needed to go to the bathroom really fast. I legitimately had to go if I wanted to be comfortable during what I thought was to come next. When I came back in his room, its as if a switch had been flipped. No more kissing, cuddling, fooling around. And no talk about what had just happened.
I don't know if he was too in the moment. If there's feelings involved or just hormones. I'm lost. And its been nonstop on my mind all day. I don't know if it was a "test" to see how far I'd go...but he knows I don't sleep around. Maybe he had a moment of clarity while I was in the bathroom? Things weren't awkward afterwards, and we've texted today. No jokes or otherwise talking about what happened though. Also, no kiss goodbye.
What is going on here? How should I proceed? What's he thinking?!
>>16943895
Maybe he thought that the bathroom was a ruse, your way of getting out of the situation?
To be honest, it'd be best to just ask him. If you want do be in a romantic relationship with him, you're going do have to learn to communicate your feelings. That said, I know I'd have difficulty bringing up the subject so try something more subtle. Make a gentle move with some physical contact, show you're interested and it wasn't a one-off thing.
If you're good friends, I'd...
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Thanks for the sincerity of your advice and response. I know the obvious thing to do would be to bring it up and ask. I've done this before though with someone else, and it backfired. Makes the guy feel pressured to define what we're doing. So, I'm honestly scared to do it again. I really don't want to mess this one up! I like him a lot! I don't even know that he knows...I try to play cool. Playing overly eager is horrible. Makes you seem needy and clingy.
>>16943980
Well, it sounds like he was into you too. So if you really like him, it'd be worth making some sort of move soon while you guys are still tugging at the boundaries of your relationship.
I completely get not wanting to have a conversation about it, I'm horrible at that stuff and it could scare him off. As cheesy as it sounds, I'd parrot his 'tell him if he goes too far' line back to him and do something flirty. That way, you're vaguely acknowledging the previous situation without...
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>very very horrible secret that I'm holding from a parent
>know they'll find out in two week's time
>telling them would get me immediately kicked out
>theyve been onto me lately especially
Should I just tell them, or try to prepare for the happening?
What is the horrible secret?
>>16943862
That I fucked up in uni which they paid around $3k for, for the second time.
>>16943873
Why would you let your parents down? What kind of shit person are you OP?
My fiance just bought pic related.
He struggled with the decision, going back and forth (mostly because I think the 'game' is retarded), and finally decided to go through with it.
I think less of him for both being indecisive, and not owning up to the fact that it's basically interactive porn (at least outright, and not until I termed it such)...as well as it being $60+...
How do I not be an asshole about this?
>inb4 just don't be an asshole about it
>>16943829
just don't be an asshole about it
Will being an asshole accomplish anything meaningful? If you answered "No" to the previous question, don't say anything.
Well simply tell him that you think for some arrogant reason that you have the right to tell him how to spend his free time and money and judge him based on an animated game about beach sluts (also I agree that game is retarded and clearly I'm as obnoxious as you are)
My car got totaled (in the fucking parking lot, no less) and I'm expecting a pretty decent check in the mail in the near future. I'm planning on replacing it with a motorcycle. Does anyone have any advice for dealing with salesmen? I detest playing games and being haggled, my line of thought was that I was going to walk in and offer what they're asking except OTD, including all fees and taxes. Does that ever actually work? The motorcycle in question is a pretty unpopular model and there are several from 2014 across a bunch of dealerships in my area that are still...
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Anyone?
Get a bike on Craigslist or Facebook sale pages. Then you're not dealing with the hell spawn that are car salesmen
>>16943791
former car salesman here
>find motorcycle online
if (you like price)
then:
>go to dealership with cashiers check for advertised price
>say "I want motorcycle for X price, here is my cashiers check."
else:
>don't go there
very simple procedure
if you're "financing" you are an obvious sucker and they will realise this and...
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Ex gf and I were together for 1 1/3 of a year, and split about 1 1/2 years ago. I broke it off with her because of school
She's messaging me now everyday after a year and a half of silence. She has made it clear she doesn't want to start things again but become friends. I don't want this, I personally want togetherness fully or nothing.
Additionally she talks about going out and getting knocked up and genuinely being slutty.
Am I being an aspire about this? I don't want to see her or speak if we're not dating, should I be more comfortable with this.
I don't even want to start dating again, I was happy before, but I don't think I want friends either.
>>16943775
Uh, aspie? No, your feelings are completely legitimate. I've been in the same situation as you, only with the genders reversed, and it's completely legitimate to not want contact with your ex. Only thing to do, in my experience, is to be brutally honest: "I have no interest in being friends, and don't contact me further. Bye." Especially with her talking about hooking up with other people, that's incredibly immature and mean-spirited. Just say no and block her. EZ
What's the problem? If you don't want to message someone you just don't (but you might want to tell them first). If they keep messaging you and the notifications annoy you then use the block button.
>>16943785
It was mean spirited, I was her first so she's become this way and wants me to know this.
I just don't know if I'm over reacting. I'm a little nervous too because I'm not great with girls.
I will tell her to lay off anons
dear /adv/, I just want perspective on general experience of what people seem to call manic depression or bipolar disorder. I'm a 22 y.o. man and it all started for me when I was 20.
20
>normal for the first 6 months
>manic episode lasting 3 months
>dark depression for the remainder
21
>alcohol and amphetamine abuse at all-time high
>can't remember much, but know that I was manic during the daytime...
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Seen this? http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b07187tc
>>16943781
no-- do you know where I could pay to watch this? I live in the US
>>16943769
>just want perspective on general experience of what people seem to call manic depression or bipolar disorder
We are not mental health professionals and are nowhere near qualified to diagnose you with anything.
Even if someone here was a mental health professional, a few green text lines is hardly enough information to make an informed guess.
You need to go see a psychiatrist and get a full evaluation. This is a medical question and should be addressed with...
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Bought myself a can of peanuts but when I opened it, the can hissed.
Bought myself another can of peanuts (different brand) and it hissed as well.
Going on assumption that its probably because both cans were packed with modified atmosphere packaging I went back to first can and chew on half of peanuts from it.
Now I have doubts, maybe both cans are fucking shot and I just gave myself a ticked to a shitty 3rd world hospital or its actually because cans are packed in MAP and they suppose to be bloated or hiss when opened.
Being pretty paranoid about shit on...
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they're supposed to do that I think.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Modified_atmosphere
why would you think you would catch a disease?
>>16943834
Well, bulging or hissing cans are a sign of spoilage.
The worst thing about them is that they are perfect environment for bacteria producing botulinum and botulinum poisoning is the last thing you wanna get when eating canned food.
Since bulging cans were always considered spoiled and there is no clear guidelines about MAP cans I have no freaking idea whether I just gave myself a poisoning or just overacted.
Would very much liked to hear from someone who knows for sure but seeing lack of information...
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>>16943865
If you had botulism you would fucking know it. You literally would have trouble breathing and speaking, probably couldn't stand on your own and would feel like you were going to die. It can be fatal too depending on how bad you have it.
I'm a flight attendant. Usually on my commute from my flat/hotel to the airport, I'm all dressed in typical FA garb. I dunno, I just don't feel like changing in a cramped bathroom stall and waiting in line to apply makeup. I usually get stares, but it's usually my own friends that poke fun. Is this unheard of or something? I remember being 16 and wearing my grocery store cashier uniform on the bus, lol.
i work night shift and all my regular clothes look pretty shitty.
so on nights off ill go out to the grocery store in full uniform and if anyone mentions it i'm on my break.
rather than being some crazy guy out in a grocery store at 2am. i love it though. no lines, the self checkout guy has literally checked himself out--huge fat bald slob but he's extremely nice.
>>16943748
Flight attendant uniforms are sexy. Nobody really cares.
>>16943748
Your friends poke fun because they're friends.
The stares are because people really want to walk up to you and ask "Where are going?" "What's it like?"
You're seen as having a cool occupation.
What happened: Met a nice interesting guy, after a few days of texting we went out for a date, which went nicely, texted for a bit more and then he just stopped (I´m not spamming him with messages, but I was the last one to text)
Now I don´t think I said anything stupid or bad, I´m pretty good looking, educated (uni), with a job and hobbies of my own (in other words not a needy bimbo).
I´m just wondering what would be a reason for you (Anonguys) to just stop texting out of the blue (without even saying anything like "Sorry, this won´t work", no explanation...
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It could be literally anything. Don't stress over it.
>>16943736
Not really stressing (well the first days maybe a bit...) It´s more of a research for the future...
maybe hes busy
maybe he doesnt want to seem too needy
maybe hes thinking you might not be into him
maybe ....
why not suck it up and try to keep the conversation running if you like him? if hes responsive its all good if hes not you know what you're at
>get telemarketer calls daily
>already registered to Do Not Call list
In stupider days, I probably have posted my number up or given it out for online orders. If I changed my number, would this alleviate anything? Or is there no escaping?
>>16943707
get an unlisted number, re-register to the do not call list, and don't give your number out again. that should help.
I just accept the call and leave it on the desk. I've never really got the fuss people make.
>>16943707
As phone scum , politely tell the caller you wish to be on their do not call list. My company calls people that call on advertisements . These people forget they called, scream, don't say they don't want the service so we call them right back.
Hi guys
I need help with my problem
Everyday when i get home, before doing anything else, i vacuum the whole room where my pc is (because i hate walking on a dusty slippery floor) and after that i clean my desk and peripherals by rubbing them with cloth and pic related. But it isn't over yet. I won't touch them untill i take a shower and i'm perfectly clean especially the hands. Who knows how many times per day i wash them and they're even bleeding right now. I do understand some cleaning is desiderable but i'm getting overwhelmed by this stuff....
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Your immune system needs you to touch dirty things. By doing all this you are becoming more susceptible to illnesses , germs and it will be harder for your immune system to fight off.
>>16943696
OCD alert!
Try a psychologist or a therapist, they help with such compulsions ;)
>>16943714
But at least i'm not touching oily keyboard and mouse and can grip them properly
Does anyone have any advice on being happy alone?
Up until 3 months ago, I always lived with good friends and/or had a girlfriend. I since moved to a smaller town for a really good job, but I live alone and am trying to be happy but I cant seem to be.
Every weekend I go back to the town where most of my friends are (only an hour away) and we have a lot of fun. But during the week it gets hard. I live in a small beach town and dont come into contact with anyone my age really.
Anyone have any tips on how to be happy alone?
>>16943642
Not very likely. Humans are social animals.
May sound girly, but find something creative to do, long term. Like an online course of drawing or learning another language. Maybe write a screenplay, read or pick up acting. Or you can learn to cook or do some sport.
Long story short just find some hobbies and don´t stay out of touch.
And there may be some local communities too...
>>16943657
Yeah I should probably look in to some local clubs or something.
The other thing is this place is kind of a stepping stone. I shouldnt be here longer than a year and a half. So Im trying to think of it just as temporary. I want to just work on myself for now.
If I do well at work, I can move to any big city I want to.
>staying up until 2am on the computer because going to bed is the same as starting the next awful day
Should I turn to drugs
Drugs are good only the first 5 times, and then you realize what they're doing. Drugs are confusing. The fix everything, but after a while begin to take everything away. Hey begin to consume you m8. Relationships with others as well as yourself begin to fade. Your focus is stuck on only one thing. After a while, when you're coming down of your high, you become depressed. Then it feels like the high is reality and the normalities are your mind's distortions of the world. Soon, life turns into just getting that next fix, which then becomes your life support. Just...
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Watch anime
>>16943627
try cannabis before you turn to drugs, anon
it works for me
Green texting this perplexing situation
>dated a girl when I was 15
>lost contact for a whole after we broke up
>get back in touch after we leave school, become friends. Text sarcastic bullshit a lot, hang out when one of us is around the other
>fast forward to a few weeks ago, in mid 20s now
>been trying to set her up with my friend she thought was cute, just wasn't happening
>she...
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>>16943617
It's not a joke, shit's real.
>>16943617
It's a joke because she thinks you're gay
>>16943617
It's a joke because you're both retarded.
