Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1183. page
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Is it rude as fuck to let your dogs bark early as fuck? Every single neighbor I have had a dog that just barks for hours on end and they let them out at 8 in the morning and just completely ignore them while they bark for hours on end. Why are they such inconsiderate pricks?
It's kind of impossible to stop dogs from barking if they want to bark, really.
Or at least I've never been able to stop mine.
>>16945187
Don't leave them outside at 8 am?
>>16945188
Oh, people do that?
Then yeah they're rude.
Anyone have experience with avoidant personality disorder here?
Is that like social anxiety?
>>16945158
No. I have little trouble talking to strangers, but living with my roommates makes me more and more stressed as time goes on.
What do you avoid in particular?
>got heart broken at 21
>meet cute virgin girl
>start dating and enter relationship immediately
>been together 5.years now
>meet woman this year
>She makes me feel like that first girl that broke my heart used to make me feel
>much more compatible with her
>She feels the same way
>she is also in a long term relationship
So how does this end bros? I kind of feel like I entered a relationship too early to get over the first girl and my heart wasn't really in on it. I care for my GF, and she does everything she can to make me happy, but I''ve always felt something was missing. That burning passion.
On the other hand, this girl is completely my other half. I've never felt so alive when we hang out, we are compatible in almost every way. And I've become infatuated with her.
What do I do bros? It's tearing me apart.
Come on adv don't fail me now
It ends whatever you decide for it to end, it's your choice.
Maybe you will get together with second woman and live happily ever after.
Maybe your passion for second woman will fade and you will decide to keep first girl.
Maybe you'll cheat and lose both.
Also, keep in mind that if you get together with woman No.2, there is also the possibility that you may become bored with her as well after 5 years. You know, once you really get to know her and the initial infatuation and mystery fades.
>>16945210
Yea the grass is always greener. I'm afraid she won't be who I thought she was and I regret my decision.
One thing is that I was never really passionate for my gf. I think I was lonely. I don't carry her in my heart, don't surprise her with nice things, wait till last day to get her gifts for holidays etc.. I do love you and care about her. The intense heartache she'd feel if I ended it is something I couldn't bear inflicting on her
Long story short,
>saw my mother after she committed suicide this month.
>friend who lead me on into dating her stood me up/ignored me today.
>every other friend stopped talking to me.
I'm debating on killing myself idk what to do..
>Are you in crisis? Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.
/adv/ isn't your therapist. We also are not a suicide hotline.
>>16945052
Those things never work trust me they never understand the situations people are in or even care really what's the point in calling those stupid places.
>>16945061
And you thought 4chan would care more? I don't see the logic. How is an anonymous imageboard known for being cruel to others going to care more than a suicide prevention hotline?
How do I deal/get over feelings of jealousy? I literally get so jealous of my boyfriend talking to other girls and it's pathetic and I know it's ruining our relationship
Come to terms with your deep seated insecurity. Establish trust, goodwill and eventually transparency in your relationship.
>>16945010
>boyfriend
Set yourself on fire
>>16945019
how do i come to terms with them? I've been struggling with insecurities from past relationships for years. How do I stop feeling like I'm not good enough and then reflecting that onto my partner?
>21
>virgin until yesterday
>date a girl for some time, she didnt want any sexual contact until last night.
>made her came twice, my tongue is sore as hell. Watched some guides to make sure she comes
>at first could not get it up, fucking emotions
>got it working, missionary first, changed for her on top
>banged like a beta-virgin for 40 minutes
>condom on
>couldnt cum
How can i solve this shit? I think we'll try again tonight.
>pic related, me right now.
>>16944933
Bumpin'
I'm not a man but there's lots of advice here such as getting a different condom size. Do u normally cum during fapping?http://www.steadyhealth.com/topics/having-sex-for-the-first-time-couldnt-cum
>>16944933
>fucking emotions
This has nothing to do with emotions.
Stop fapping and phisically abusing your penis while doing so.
What do you call the practice of carefully choosing some fashion style, manners of talking, behaviors, and so on with the goal of improving how you're perceived by others?
>>16944900
It is called the practice of carefully choosing some fashion style, manners of talking, behaviors, and so on with the goal of improving how you're perceived by others
How I got out of my awkward teen years.
>>16944900
Protective camouflage
Why do Anglos stereotype Hispanics as family-orientated when Anglos are equally as family-orientated? Every Anglo expat in my area who has kids is obsessed with uploading photos of their kids onto Facebook where 99% of their Facebook wall is covered with family photos - they are family-orientated as fuck themselves.
(sorry for posting here. I want serious responses and I don't think I can get them on /int/ or /b/)
Facebook is everyone's personal shrine to themselves. Simply posting pictures of your family doesn't necessarily mean that family is important to you, only that you want to show it off.
>>16944905
>Simply posting pictures of your family doesn't necessarily mean that family is important to you
Why the heck would you post something that is not important to you? Would a person who doesn't like Taylor Swift share pictures of her on Facebook?
>only that you want to show it off
I don't think so. The Anglo expats here seem obsessed with their kids. And their wives too, considering that they like to post pictures of their family with their wives in it as well. This English teacher I had likes to talk about his kid all the time even when it is irrelevant as fuck and bringing his kid to school events that are obviously unintended for toddlers.
Whites are generally all about their immediate family, but wider family is ignored. 'Family' to non-whites can include several generations, and cousins, second cousins, and more distant relations
A 30-year-old woman dating a 35-year-old guy with kids or a 30-year-old woman dating a 5o-year-old guy whose kids already moved out?
Or are they both very unlikely to work out?
>>16944850
Impossible to say. We don't know what any of the four people are looking for, and that's crucial information.
Relationships are designed to fill needs. If they fill the needs of both people, they tend to last.
So you've gotta ask yourself - what are the needs of the four people in your question, and can their respective partners fill them?
>>16944907
Well almost everyone on /adv/ said that a relationship with someone with young kids will lead to misery even if it does work out and almost everyone on /adv/ said that an age gap that is too big is unlikely to work out.
depends on the case
How does one stop being a beta male?
>>16944839
Go after what you want.
That's really the only difference, when you get down to it.
>>16944839
By throwing out simplistic and immature terms like "Alpha male" and "Beta male".
>>16944853
This is a pretty good advise, if when you understand what "get down to it" means.
Example: If a girl isn't interested in you, then move instantly on. Because why should you bother for her? She denied you, you can't get her, search for a new girl.
This behavior needs self-confidence, courage any many other characteristics too.
What do you when you have complete indifference towards life?
>21, 22 this year
>4.0 gpa
>getting my AA this year at college and then going to uni
>Just got out of a long term relationship 3 months ago
>Already dating new girls
>Decent amount of $ in bank account, not in any debt
Yet, I have literally no desire to live. I don't even feel sad, just ready to die. Its hard to explain. But I can't, because my family would literally fall apart. What am I supposed to do? Tending to obligations and shit, when you see literally 0 point in living is extremely tedious.
>>16944458
Honestly, go see a therapist. I'm not sure that you're depressed, but with this level of indifference (if I am to derive that correctly based on your description) should be something you talk about with a professional. It could also just be you need a change of scenery. It doesn't seem like you're too interested in your surroundings.
>>16944526
No. He should go to a psychiatrist, not a therapist. It's clearly a psychiatric disorder we're talking about here (most likely major depression).
I'm bipolar and I had very similar symptoms as you. I didn't even realize that I suffered from depressive episodes because I thought having depression is the same thing as just feeling depressed.
What you describe sounds a lot like a case of clinical depression at the very least, so go to a psychiatrist and tell them everything.
bamp
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't. Our answers are not going to help you.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical act/moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely. Preferences differ.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking.
>Brandon
Fuck off
Old Thread: >>16941267
There is an event I'd like to ask someone to in two weeks. Should I just ask now, or wait until it's closer?
I feel like if I don't make contact I definitely won't be contacted either. I don't know if that matters, though.
>>16944339
Errr... Why would you wait?
So they can have less time to prepare/more time to make other plans?
>>16944344
Sorry, I should have given more info.
I asked to hang out recently and got a very generic "I'm busy" answer with no follow up. Just like I'm busy, let's hang later.
So I'm worried asking so soon might be weird? But I guess if it is that just means they aren't into me, which is information is like to know anyway.
I'm thinking seriously about getting in to teaching and/or educational work for children. Part of the reason is because I like kids and I've had some good experiences with volunteer work and part-time jobs along those lines in the past. The other part though is that I feel like it might very well be the best (only, even) way for an introverted weirdo like me to meet the kind of woman I'd consider (and who might possibly consider me) long term relationship or even marriage material: smart, compassionate, gentle, intellectual, nerdy.
Is that an unrealistic hope? Is my head stuck in the clouds? Do a lot of people meet (or make) significant others doing this kind of work?
I'd say yeah. I'm currently going to uni to become a teacher, and there is a good amount of ladies in my classes. Some aren't really nerdy at least not the kind of nerdy I am, but generally they are nice. Sure some are bitches, but you run into those everywhere.
>>16944086
>>16944103
Teacher here
DON'T DO IT!!! DON'T STOP STOP STOP!!! IT'S NOT WORTH IT!!!
>>16944161
B-but anon working with kids makes me feel like I'm not a parasitic piece of shit
I applied like at 3 places last week and never gotten a call back. Does this usually happen or do I just have shitty luck?
It's you who needs to call them.
Though going in and talking to someone in person is always the best idea.
>>16943812
It's normal. Either they've got someone and they won't call you back or they get a weeks worth of applications and they pick the one they want.
>>16943812
Most employers build up a few resumes for a position before hiring. They don't just call back because you came in. Keep trying.
feeling suicidal... I don't like myself. my depression has caused people to leave me. I don't enjoy anything in life ... can anyone give me reasons to live/make me happy?
You have FOREVER to be dead, trillions of years you'll be dead. No reason to start ahead of time.
>>16943493
>I don't like myself.
Maybe you have a flawed idea of who you are? Would be a shitty thing to kill yourself because you don't like something that isn't even there.
>you don't like yourself
Idfc just become super introspective. Do shit for the experience, by becoming suicidal your framing yourself in someone else. Disappear into the woods for a few days or idk take a week long sailing trip if you're done with being a human then explore other aspects of the world, why waste a life when you could pull a Chris Mccandless and hell maybe someone will write a fucking book about you and kids will know your name long after you actually die thinking about how cool it would be to have your life
