Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1140. page
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>See gf a week ago
>Have sex with no condom, I didn't cum
>She took the birth control pill about an hour later
>She's on her period today
How do I convince her she's not pregnant?
Does she take the pill at the same time every day? If so, she's likely not pregnant. You can have sex without a condom on the pill.
>>16953538
Is she 12 or just retarded? Either is illegal where I'm from, naughty naughty.
>>16953538
She gets her period a week after the last time you had sex.
The birth control is not relevant.
She is not pregnant.
If I get treatment for something in Germany, is that record of that treatment visible to health insurance companies and doctors in the united states? I want to get a prescription for my ADHD here but I don't want my parents to know I'm back on it.
Only if you notified them.
I don't want to hijack, but is lasik eye surgery cheaper outside the US? It's already pretty inexpensive here ($3000), but just curious.
>>16953569
Go to Albania. They do it for 500USD
Let's say that I worked in a cafeteria for only 6 months. Is it legit to lie and say that I worked there for 3 years instead? How about jobs that I never did before, like waiter or kitchen porter?
I wouldn't lie that much. You need to lavish yourself and do white lies on a resume. Not straight up "I worked at this place for several years" when you didn't.
I volunteered at an animal shelter for 3 months. I turned that into 6 months. I "helped the kitchen" when all I really did is prepare and place coffee for guests. I wouldn't lie about your last employment length because they'll check that. If it was a stupid project like my volunteering and it's not a reference with a phone number, I know they won't.
Also kind of off topic, but never ever joke during an interview. Light hearted is fine, but no jokes.
>>16953517
It's so easy to check this stuff out that I wouldn't even try to lie.
The best you could do is talk to your former supervisor, explain that a three-month sting looks bad and ask if he would agree to say you worked there six months. And that only works if they don't have an HR department to double check.
Lie as much as you like, its not like a person looking for a dishwasher or kitchen porter is ever going to get in touch with the CSI Miami to check you out.
In fact tell them you were head chef at Maison Eric on the Champs Elyseè in Paris, but gave it up due to stress, and you now prefer to work undercover for Michelin as they are thinking of starting up a star system for greasy joe diners. Tell them this info is confidential, but if they give you a job you will put in a good report to Michelin hq.
I realized I have to decide on a hobby to focus on if I wanna become any good at it. I'm 18 and I want to hopefully make money from one of them down the line. Which one would be the best to focus more on? I like all of them about equally.
>computer programming
>electronic music production
>playing guitar
>video editing
>digital art
I would consider myself pretty skilled in all of them but I think I need to focus on one if I wanna have a shot at making money from it. I have done all of these except the digital art one in a serious manner (concert, game programming project and contributing to open source projects, made a songs for Youtube channels etc, made a movie that got accepted for a local film festival. But I still need to get better to be able to support myself on it.
I have been thinking of which one to choose for 6 months now and now I'm asking your for advice.
Does anyone have any advice?
Oh, and excuse my English, I'm not a native speaker. Reading through it now, I realize I made some mistakes.
>>16953662
Yes, choose less miserably isolating hobbies. I hope you aren't planning on making friends and becoming involved with a community of like-minded fellows with those hobbies.
How do you deal with inequalities in a relationship?
I've been in a relationship for about a year with this girl and it's amazing. I really do have an amazing time with her, trust her, and ultimately I want to be with her for the rest of my life. However, she brought up a few inequalities that favor me and it got me thinking of how many inequalities that favor her. We live together but the housework is pretty shared, so not going to be complaining about chores. I'd say out of all of our inequalities/double standards at least 80% benefit her or allow her to do things that I'm 'not allowed' to. Some examples:
>I definitely put more effort overall in the relationship, maybe 75%-80%.
>She talks to her ex but gets pissed if I talk to girls she doesn't like or is suspicious of
>She can take hours to reply to a text message but expects me to reply within minutes
>In the bedroom I feel as if my pleasure is often regarded to as an afterthought and not as important. Not always, but maybe 5-15% of the time I either don't achieve orgasm or most of the effort is put into pleasing her and I'm an afterthought.
>I always have to walk our dog and feed/water him. It isn't that she's neglectful of him just expects me to do that stuff.
>If I'm not feeling well I still have to wash the dishes and do other housework where as she expects me to do her share when she's not feeling well
>She can act like she's ashamed of me like not introducing me as her boyfriend (and explicitly not wanting certain people to know) and doesn't want me to meet certain people
>etc
A lot of these don't particularly irritate me and I can live with them but it really irritated me when she brought up inequalities despite her having the most and biggest ones. Inequalities on my side are small and infrequent. How do I deal with this? I don't mind there being some inequalities and to a degree I feel like every relationship has them. But she has a lot more than me.
I know that if I bring up any of these inequalities to her there will be a bullshit excuse for them or outright denial.
>>16953498
what are those inequalities on your side? you listed all of hers but arent listing your own. to you they may seem small, but from an outside perspective they might be more or less equal.
>>16953503
>i know that if i bring up any of these inequalities to her there will be a bullshit excuse for them or outright denial
then delete your thread, cuz the only advice you wil lget is
>talk to her about it
or
>stop the inequalities as they happen
>>16953504
On my side
>When I'm upset I can sometimes copy what she did to make me upset, ex if she said something to upset me I'd say it back a few hours later
>I have more say when it comes to the dog, ex how to train him
>I can be like 'I don't want to talk about it"
That's really it.
My wife has this shitty ass friend that annoys the shit out of me. She's almost always rude to my wife. Gives her shit because she doesn't have as much free time as her. My wife has a job and goes to school. Meanwhile, her friend just works and still lives with her parents. She got bitchy at my wife because she didn't get her the makeup she wanted for her bday. She's immature and childish. My wife also told me she used to steal clothes from her and denied it when my wife confronted her.
What can I do? She invited my wife for her bday dinner Wednesday and my wife thought I was invited too. But I wasn't. And I'm supposed to give my wife money to go to this dinner ( my wife only has money for bills since she is full time student) she also invited my wife to a club which I cannot go on since I'm 20.
All this bitch talks about is makeup and fucking dudes. She contributes nothing to my wife's life. My wife doesnt even share her intimate stuff best friends usually talk about like being depressed or sex life ect... yet she calls her bestfriend.
They have been friends since elementary school but I feel like this bitch is holding my wife back
We are moving to a much bigger apt and she mentioned having her sleep over. I didn't say anything but she will not be welcomed.
Tl;dr: my wife's best friend is immature all she talks about is hooking up with dudes and spending her income on top tier make up and clothes. My wife gets jealous sometimes and spends money she doesn't have on make up. Fucking up her credit and having less money to spend on us.
Please no comments on my age or my wife's age. I'm 20. My wife is 22 and her friend just turned 21.
If you're wife cannot see that this is causing a detriment to her life and yours, there is literally nothing you can do.
You need to talk to your wife and point these things out to her, because it seems to her that her friend's mannerisms and way of life are just "how she is and always has been".
The fact that your wife gets jealous over a petty superficial friend is a bad sign though.
>>16953485
talk to your wife about her real feelings on her friend. if she doesn't actually like her friend anymore, DONT suggest she dumps her friend. that will make her feel sad, and like you are trying to be the only thing in her life.
instead, suggest she focus on new friends. offer to host a little 'dinner party' or whatever for her friends from work or school, people she doesnt know well but would like to get to know more. if shes more on the nerd side, invite them over for game night. if they're more on the party side, just invite them over for beer pong.
point is to offer to help facilitate her opening up her friend circle, as opposed to closing out the only(?) friend she does have.
but if your wife doesnt see her as anything more than am inor annoyance, than you are more or less stuck with her.
you cant blame her friend for your wife's bad shopping habits.
>>16953499
I've suggested ny wife to make friends. I have introduced her to my female high school friends and she would talk to them for 3 days and then stop replying.
My wife stops spending money on make up for awhile and then when her friend rubs on her face her new make up shit I suddenly see that she bought a $50 makeup kit with her maxed out credit card
I'm working part time and on disability. Social Security wants my paystubs from my last employer (Subway), even though I stopped working for them mid-last year. I don't have those, no idea how to get them and I really don't want to call the store, get the manager's number and then get the district manager's number.
I have my W-2 and paystubs for my current employer whom I've worked for from July 2015-Present, but the woman on the phone said I also need my past employers from last year. I told her I can't, she said "do the best you can and send in what you have".
Do I have enough? What do? I'm worried. I make next to nothing and everything I do make goes towards rent, school and my car loan. They know that and have been generally really nice. The manager at my local SS office is who I usually speak with. Maybe I should send her an email.
>>16953474
Any ideas how to get a past W-2 from an employer? Subway had a employee login system but none of my email addresses are working
https://partners.subway.com/portal/Login/tabid/58/Default.aspx?returnurl=%2fportal%2fdefault.aspx
>>16953477
Any ideas if I check TurboTax for my old W-2? I can't seem to find anything.
Where to find fat lesbian/bi girls who like video games and board games?
If you're an adult
I've tried OkCupid and Tinder and there's surprisingly hardly any of this type of girl on there.
>>16953471
>what is tumblr
>what is reddit
>>16953471
Literally any college campus. Fucking why though.
And yeah Tumblr.
Tinder and other dateing sites are more or less for attractive or at least normal acting people. Of you want a fat nasty unshaven sjw those aren't the places to look.
>>16953471
tumblr
I recently fell for this girl at work, she's beautiful, has a great personality and we talk and hang a lot after hours and, i can't stop obsessing over her.
But its gotten too much, ive lost appetite, i cant sleep. All i think about is her, I can't chill. I am 100% this isn't normal, I have never felt this way about someone before, infact, i have never dated anyone before.
Is there something wrong?
>>16953450
Pretty normal to be restless about something you've never experienced before. Just try not to mess yourself up skipping meals and losing sleep hours.
Also, try to think about how she'll think of herself if she knew you'd been losing sleep and meals because of her. I'd feel bad if I was her.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lovesickness
Congrats, you're in love.
Either ask her out or just forget about it. Those are the only productive things you can do. I recently fell for someone that doesn't even live in the same state and it was killing me. So I told her how I felt and actually got somewhere instead of just obsessing.
>girl leads me on for 2-3 weeks
>I like her a lot
>she starts seeing a guy and ignores me
>turns out the guy that she dated raped her
S-should I laugh at her?
>>16953439
No.
Any other advice needed?
>>16953439
You wanna be the ultimate douchebag?
>>16953439
Of course not.
The fact that you're the kind of person to laugh at a rape victim is why she's uninterested in you.
Work on being a better person.
>get an assignment for a paper
>do nothing but procrastinate
>anxiety builds up day after day
>cram everything at the last few days
>all nighters galore
This has been my routine for almost four years now, and I think there's something wrong with me. I feel shit and want to off myself everyday for not doing stuff like I'm supposed to be. It feels like I've grown addicted to the feeling of utter hopelessness or something, and it's starting to take its toll on me.
Right now I'm cramming on a paper I'm supposed to pass and get checked before a defense on Tuesday even after being given two whole months for preparation, and I'm at my wit's end, as usual.
What's your take on being prompt regarding your duties, and how do I stop myself from creating these self-destructive situations?
I know the feels man, I was in the exact same situation as you a few years back.
Nothing worked for me, no study plans, penalties etc, I am sorry to tell you this but you just need resolve.
If it's working, meaning you're getting good grades and accomplishing the things you would otherwise accomplish, then why change? If it's not working, then like the other anon said for only thing that will help you is resolve. There's no magic trick to it, you just have to work on shit and get it done during the day.
Im currently in college and just got over over procrastinating the way that you do. I dont know how I did it other than just deciding that what i was doing was retarded and that i should work towards not procrastinating so much anymore. I know it feels like an impossible obstacle to get over, but its really just a gradual process of eatablishing new habits and getting over your old ones. The more you engage in these new habits, the more they become natural reflexes over time. Its never too late to start either, so dont let your anxiety tell you that you cant do it. What i think about that helps me a lot is that if i just get it over with now, ill have plenty of free time to relax and not worry about it later, plus ill feel proud of myself for actually doing it. Over time you look forward to that pride and it just becomes a natural routine for you. Think of it like a brick wall blocking your path, that you're taking apart one brick at a time. At first ittl be a slow process and youll only want to take down a few bricks at a time. But after a while it becomes easier and youre taking down multiple bricks each time you try with increasing ease. Then eventually the wall will completely gone and you can move forward on the path that is your life, or something like that. Either way, you can do it and i believe in you OP.
How do I meet other young people my age (22,23) after college? Should I move to a city? It feels like all rural/suburban areas are just a dead end for singles.
Even in an urban setting, you can't make "meeting people" your top priority. It can work in a city but you're going to end up around desperately lonely people who are probably alone for good reasons.
The best way to meet people as a young adult is to first establish your lifestyle as a young adult. You have the opportunity (albeit not always the resources of time, money, etc.) to explore ideas and find out what sorts of stuff you really enjoy. You could spend the next decade just trying new things without ever having to settle down into a routine with any of them. There's that much out there. Now I'm talking in general terms; in rural areas there might indeed not be all that much available to you. It's up to you to milk the most you can from your setting and then make a move when you're ready for more. But you need to get to living--really living--before you add the company of other people. Not only will that provide the substance for the time you spend with these people, it'll let you cross paths with them in the first place. You want to meet people with a similarly active mindset. Those people are much better than those who socialize for the sake of socializing.
Yes. Move to a city. Then sign up on dating sites and tinder. Also go to events on meetup.com.
I want to kick this photoshopped simpering bitch in the face.
I trained to be a Programmer. Mom wants me to be a mechanic.
I graduated from College in 2007 with a Bachelors in Computer Science. However, because of my disability, my mother though I should be on Social Security Disability Income and take a part time job, and be part of some vocational program with people with worse disabilities some who never graduated high school, were on drugs, had been in and out of jail, yet for some reason the geniuses at our State Vocation Reabilitation office though I would be perfect for such program.
It has been a turmultuous 8 years later. I've been in two of those programs, one where I was kicked out and Voc Rehab didn't want to speak to me any more after I tried stating my case that I wasn't a violent person.
Without VR's help this past year, I managed to acquire a part time job with the help of my dad. Ad despite fighting with my mother for the past 8 years to tell her "there are no part-time positions in the tech industry", she has continued to push that I work at a local aircraft factory to become an aircraft mechanic despite that I trained to be a software engineer to do things that were far from the field of aircraft engineering or mechanical stuff, never went to a technical school, and despite doing well at the college I went to always seem to flunk out of whatever community college course that I take.
Yet she is persistent. And she is obstinate. And she is losing her job at the end of the month. And both Social Security and Voc Rehab want to meet up next week.
(1/2)
TLDR: I'm ready to grow up and take a full time job, but mom doesn't want me to fearing failure so she wants me to be something else and train to be something else so that VR pays for it and so Social Security pays me still.
How do I take some fucking sense into her?
(Yeah, I know I should have done this sooner, but she have a problem with this until unemployment became her problem too.)
(2/2)
>>16953418
>have had a degree for the greater side of ten years
>degree with monetary potential
>still a mommy's boy
What the fuck OP? You don't have to listen to her lol.
I had a first date in a bar with a guy from Tinder, thought I'd have a few beers and then head home. But then he says he doesn't have the money for more beer but he has rum and coke at his place and asked if I wanted to come with. Idiot that I was, I agreed.
Now, my tolerance for stronger drinks is very poor. Also, I often start insulting people out of nowhere and generally being an aggressive dick when too drunk. Yeah... I quickly got roaring drunk and kept asking him the same question over and over again. I don't remember everything, but I kept asking if he was looking for a one-night stand, even after he told me a million times he wasn't. I kept asking if he's an autist (ouch). I bit his piercing and probably did some other godawful things I can't remember.
To top it all off, I dozed in his bed till 5PM the next day since I was too hungover and hungry to leave. He did come lie next to me and we had sex for a bit in the afternoon, but later he got kinda pissed when I wasn't leaving. He didn't talk to much during the day and seemed kinda angry, maybe? I don't know.
I messaged him to apologize and tell him I don't usually pull this kind of shit. I realize that I was really, really shitty and he'd be justified if he never wanted to see me again.
Just, I liked him and we had fun for a while. Can I still salvage this and get to know him better, and show him I'm not as insane as I seemed?
>>16953396
id move on
Woah, what a mess.
Cut your ties.
>>16953396
You should seriously contemplate your life and the choices you make in it.
Promiscuity is frowned upon for a reason.
Early 20's in a new state with high school diploma, how do I start my path to serve the public?
By volunteering in your community and venturing no further into politics. Politics corrupts the mind and soul and by the time you get to a position where you are able to do something you will no longer have the desire to. If you want to help the public do so directly.
>>16953367
Avoid politics. Go into non-profit charity organizations.
I'm determined. Change needs to start from the top, and I hope to do so in the Office on day.
What are some specific credentials I would need from education?
