Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1138. page
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I made a mistake when I was 17, and I didn't think anything of it when I made it because I was ignorant and it followed me up until I was 20 and I realized the error of my ways. I'm 21 now and over the last few months my memories haunt me because I was so ignorant and I made reckless decisions and choices and I'm worried it may come back to me. I never hurt or really harmed anyone except myself and I just really effected myself, I've lived in paranoia the last 7 months since school started. I try to enjoy myself but I can't stop thinking about my mistakes...
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>>16954148
What did you do?
>>16954158
I don't want to explicitly say what I did, but I had a porn addiction and I would say I've been addicted to porn since I was a small child, and when I was a teen it ventured into other explicit porn that is normally looked down upon. I literally was never really into it, I just looked at it for the sake of lookin at it and I just didn't care because it was the Internet and I felt I was doing nothing wrong. But when I got older I felt different and I was more disgusted at myself
>>16954186
Is it illegal? I mean I dont see how it can affect you now.. if its just a moral thing then stop being a moralfag you already moved on just stop wasting your time feeling bad for being a horny teen.
Alright so I basically fucked myself up.
The past two weeks before this one I pretty much binge drank 4-5 days out of the week. I usually get anxiety the next day after drinking but I was able to ignore it and still drink. Anyway, this Sunday I was hungover and decided I should take a break for at least a week and I felt okay just a little tired but that night something happened.
I was in the middle of a lightish workout when I suddenly got this strange otherworldly feeling like the walls were closing in and my limbs seemed bigger than normal. I kind of brushed it off but throughout the night I progressively started feeling worse and worse. I got this buzzing kind of feeling in the back of my head and my heart wouldnt stop beating fast.
Ive had a really hard time falling asleep since and have had intermittent bouts of unexplainable saddness and can't seem to get comfortable doing anything for too long.
This has happened to me before and took about a month to clear up although it was worse last time. Got work on Saturday, should I tough it out or try and get some xanax or something?
Been taking a fourth of .5mg clorazepram when I really can't sleep but I dont have much left.
Its been almost 4 days.
Also any anecdotes about anyone experiencing similar thing would be appreciated.
Do you have depression/bipolar disorder? Sounds similar to mania. I don't drink, but there are times that I'll have an out of body experience, similar to what you explained while working out, and depending on how I take that experience I'll be hypermanic or depressive for a week tops.
>>16954135
Not to my knowledge. Usually working out makes me feel more relaxed than anything afterward.
I do have generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder to an extent though(actually diagnosed) but it's usually more of a nuisance rather than an all consuming thing.
Ive been with my girlfriend for 2 months now and its starting to annoy me that she has no drive whatsoever. She has no drive to improve her life to or better her situation, she is even too afraid to talk to her boss about cutting her hours down. Whenever we go out or anything I have to plan everything and think of stuff to do otherwise we just watching tv. She also doesn't seem to like when I tell people that we are dating or taking pictures together (someone did that with my phone and she went through and deleted them all)
Its starting to make me even more mad that...
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It's only been two months.
Tell her what you told us.
If she flips, not a huge loss.
If she takes it to heart and gets off her ass, great.
In all likelihood it will just make her feel bad and she won't do anything about it. Leave her. If it's only been 2 months and your this annoyed about it, it's not going to work out. You're different kinds of people.
She sounds like a piece of shit, OP. You can't make her change she has to want to. Also, if she doesn't want pictures circulating of you together she's either embarrassed of being seen with you or has other guys on the side.
>>16954123
Ive been friends with her for almost a year before that, I knew she didn't have much drive but I thought that she would change for me. Its also pretty awkward since we both work together.
I have multiple personality disorders and because of this I never want have children. Both sides of my family have disorders too, so the likelihood of it being passed on to my offspring is high. Most of my friends and family tell me it's a dramatic decision and that I'll end up changing my mind the older I get.
Anyone else feel this way? Does it cause a strain in long-term relationships? Any parents who learned how to cope and deal with it while raising children?
I'm pretty set in stone about not having children, to the point where I'm planning...
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>>16954118
Same. My mothers side of the family are made of fucked up sociopaths and there are numerous suicides. My fathers side had an advanced intellect, my grandfather was apparently known for memorizing books and retelling entire stories throughout a few days or weeks to children with complete accuracy.
That resulted in me, a not quite average but not quite genius person with a variety of mental issues.
I would be a terrible, terrible, terrible father. I wont get a vasectomy since I won't be having...
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>>16954130
I was an accident too. I have a loving mother and stepfather (mom struggles with depression, was really abusive when I was younger) and my bio dad was out of the picture for a majority of my life, but he has OCD and bipolar.
I seemed to get the worst of all the disorders along with shitty eyesight and asthma and shit, so passing that on to a kid sounds really awful. I can only imagine how heinous it would be to have a manic episode and want to leave the house and be by myself for a couple of days while...
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>>16954118
ITT: People who have no clue what they're talking about.
You don't have multiply personality disorders. "Sociopath" isn't a thing.
Hey
Had a girl rejecting me for the first time a few days ago. She was cool with it, but that was horribly awkward, I don't want it to happen again. How do I know if someone is interested in me, /adv/ ?
Here's a much more realistic piece of advice: brush the sand out of your vagina, Daisy. The rest of your life is going to be full of horribly awkward experiences. EVERYONE'S LIFE IS. The difference is that we don't let it get to us. It's the equivalent of a mosquito bite. It's uncomfortable as fuck but you keep on going, not asking how to walk around in a mosquito-proof net for the rest of your life.
>>16954012
What you want is irrelevant. If you want to go out with girls, you must ask them, and you might get rejected. Sometimes you'll misread signs, sometimes you'll read them right but she's otherwise tied in a relationship, and sometimes she'll just be in a bad mood and reject you to be mean, when the day before she seemed into you. This is the deal. It is not fair, but it is the hoop you must jump through to slay that pusspuss.
>>16954012
you're already better than my first date, she bailed for a month, came up with excuses and just went on the date to get it over with, and then immediately started dating another guy.
I just don't try anymore because I know the outcome, I don't have enough confidence to look a girl in the eyes, nevermind get her to trust me.
I met a cute Russian girl on Tinder.
I picked her up yesterday and we went for a walk and made out.
I dropped her off, and we made plans to meet Saturday. She said she wanted to have sex.
Today she messaged me saying that she wants to hook up, but she's worried that since she's 16 years old, I could get in trouble. I'm 22.
I looked it up, and most sites say that the age of consent in Connecticut is 16. Some sites say that 16 is the age of consent, but with a 2-3 year gap. So it only applies if you're slightly older than them, like...
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I don't know shit all about the age of consent, but being old enough to understand legalese, and looking at your states laws, you're misunderstanding things.
UNDER the age of 16 there is a two year grace period.
Meaning a 17 year old is fine with a 15 year old.
However a 18 year old cannot be with a 15 year old, both because that is more than 2 years, and because at 18 and above you MUST wait until the age of consent (16 unless you're a coach/teacher/supervisor, at which point you must wait until 18)
In your state, at the age of 16...
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>>16954036
Sweet. So we're golden.
I'm gonna make love to this big booty Russian teenager. My state is actually pretty cool.
>>16954003
You can speak to the local authorities about this kind of thing, it's not something that is frowned upon.
And no, this isn't a bait or troll. In general cops are here to protect you and make sure you're safe, and don't want you to get into trouble. It's not at all a big deal to go into an office to ask about your area's laws and regulations.
I have a problem, /adv/.
I'm going to digress a little. I'm not one to sugarcoat my relationship skills. Sometimes I believe I can be a little under confident in my interactions with whichever girl I like. In addition, I am too cold in a lot of my reactions and I often feel that I do not act as genuine as I could be. Nevertheless, I will say that I generally am a confident, somewhat-alpha male (for lack of a better term, because I don't really like using it to describe me. However, I am certainly not beta in the way I approach relationships.)
So,...
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>>16953929
HERE'S MY QUESTION.
Have any of you had this kind of situation? Have you actually ever lost a girl to a guy because the competing guy appealed to the femininity of the girl? Do girls find femininity attractive, and if so to what extent? In the words of everywhere else on 4chan, did I just get "cucked" by a beta? And lastly, how do I counter this absolutely horrible, unexpected turn of events?
Girls only like dominat alphas if they are subs and are actually attacted to the "alpha" betas get laid all the time 2 man, and he seems closer to her than you, quit trying to define as alpha or beta its not a binary trait.
It has been two weeks since i quit but I'm still craving every day. When is it going to stop ? Is it worth it ? Fuck my life.
Yes, it's worth it. Even if you wanted to die of lung cancer, saving the money is totally worth it. Anyone who tells you it isn't a lot of money is doomed to be a poorfag forever. The richest people I know are the stingiest, with good reason.
Also, I've watched 5 people now, of various ages, die of respiratory disease and I'd fucking shoot myself first. Painful, no fucking dignity.
Exercise (cardio is excellent for this) and go to a sauna for the next two weeks.
Once you detox your body, you won't want a cig. & if you smoke one, you will have toxic feels.
I smoked for 10+ years and the above worked for me. That, and thinking, "do I really want to be a /smoker/ my whole life?" Also: old women that have smoked for a long time. Their raspy voices are gnar as fuck.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyVLKHEqTu0
Every day cravings will be gone soon. You'll probably have your first easy day the next time you're busy with stuff.
The intermittent cravings will be with you forever. One day you're going to be standing around somewhere, maybe having a cup of coffee, watching some birds shit on a car and you'll suddenly think "Man, I could use a smoke right now."
Of course it's worth it. Cancer sucked. Gonna suck some more if it comes back.
How's it going adv?
well I'm feeling helpless in that situation, I'll try to make it as short as possible:
>meet qt at festival, about 6 or 7years ago
>solid 8.5, looks cute like an angel, body like a model, 5,11 tall (181cm)
>we hang out the evening, talking all night long laying in the grass watching the stars
>didn't even make out because she had to leave, she asks for my number gets it
>sorry...
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Stop getting so down over relationship issues. You have plenty of time to live and love and there are plenty more amazing people out there.
People drift apart. You're too young to be worried about this kind of thing. Trust me: I wasted 3 years of my teenage years on a girl I never got to keep. Get out and have fun with your friends. Find a hobby. Life goes on.
...
>I ask her: well you don't want to do this anymore do you?
>"well it doesn't make any sense like this anon"
>of course she is right, but I'm sure she fell in love with someone else, wich is normal with 17 years if you don't want a long distance relationship
>next weeks were horrible for me, I still love her to death
>apparently she had a boyfriend bout 2 month later, but they didn't...
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So yesterday I was posting something on 4chan and suddenly I had a lot of mental confusion. Like, I couldn't come up with anything to say, I was frozen, unable to type. After that I had built up a belief that my reading comprehension has sharply decreased. I feel a sense of weirdness, like at any moment I won't be able to think or read, or even have opinions or certain viewpoints about things, almost as if I've reached a true neutrality. Sometimes it seriously does seem like it's true, yet I don't have any evidence that it is.
Is this what they...
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I've been told by 2 psychologists I have depersonalization and I still don't fully understand it. Best bet is to get advice from a professional, not on 4chan.
From my experience, I tend to 'zone out' and feel like I'm not really there. Pretty uncomfortable desu
Anon who has did here. Sounds exactly like depersonalization. Did everything seem unreal or look weird to you? That's derealization and I always get those two together. It can be scary so make sure you don't lose yourself. Just be calm and relaxed. Do you suffer from any other mental problems?
>>16953867
>>16953875
Everything does sort of seem unreal and weird. I do have other mental problems, obsessive compulsive disorder and depression. Another thing I should say is, I've just come back from living and working in Japan for 7 months. I've been back for almost 2 weeks and I'll admit, life hasn't seemed "real" to me or joyful. I thought it would be a wonderful reunion, but it feels strange, like I don't actually belong here.
I have been a chef for over 5 years, and through a lot of hard work and extra hours I've managed to become a Head Chef. I recently (October 2015) got approached by a company to become their Head Chef. They are a new company, and have been around for just over a year, so are learning as they go. They are very very profitable and are opening up two more shops this year. I joined the company because I saw a lot of promise, and invested my time and skills in the company with the promise that I will become the manager of every additional kitchen opening up.
I started on a measly £7.00p/h and was promised an increase as soon as I proved I could do what I said I could. I have yet to receive any increase although querying it. My responsibilities have increased, I now take care of 90% of orders, menu design, pricing, weekly special design and pricing, additional prep work at home and supplier relations.
I am patiently waiting any word from them, as I am in the midst of trying to move out with my Girlfriend. We need to move out by June and are struggling to be taken seriously by any estate agents as I'm only on £12,000 ish a year.
Do I query my wage with my employers? Do you think they're playing me? (Although if I leave, they cannot run the kitchen by themselves, as they have no other chefs and any other staff that can make the food I do) Do you think I should start to seek either additional work, or a new job?
The problem is, with the company growing at such a speed, and I pull out now because I'm struggling, I will lose the opportunity to become a high ranking employee within a business I can see becoming a country wide name.
Thanks for reading, any help would be great!
You are getting fucked.
Go to main boss. Tell him you have 25k job 35hr week starting in two weeks. See what happens.
Head Chefs of multiple locations don't make hourly. Let alone 7 hourly.
You pretty much tell them you are not working another minute until they give you the wage increase they promised.
You aren't a charity, and the amount they are paying you for the responsibilities that you now have is essentially them trampling on you and treating you like shit.
They will have to cave if you are the only one. I'm surprised they are expanding as you say they are, as they seem to be fucking retarded when it comes to business if they think it's a good idea to not only have one single chef that makes the food you do, but to also treat...
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My gf told me she was born with a rare condition where she's technically female but has fully-functional testicles inside her body, and they produce male pre-cum but not sperm.
Basically every time I thought I was making her gush she was man-cumming on my cock and idk how to feel about this.
She's pretty feminine otherwise and her vagina looks normal except for a very large clit.
Have I been fucking a dude?
>>16953820
"S'ei piace, ei lice"
If you like it, who gives a shit
No.
She identifies as female, so no. All females have a dick/balls (clit, labia) that doesn't mean you're having sex with a man.
Hello /adv/,
I suspect that my little brother is molesting my little sister (brother is in his teenage years, sister is much younger). The thing is, I'm not entirely sure and thus I don't have any evidence to prove this. How would I go about confronting my family about this issue and how could I get him charged? What should I do?
I live in the UK, if it's any help.
You need to gather evidence, dingus.
You could try confronting him and try the hard threat approach.
"Hey <broanon> how's it going! So I've been noticing something funny going on with <sisanon> and just thought I'd let you know :): if I find out you've been touching her I'm going to chop your balls off before turning you over to the police so they can throw your ass in jail where Jamal can have his way with you all night long. K? Have a good one :).
I wouldn't confront your family about it.
Parents can do insane mental gymnastics to block out what's really going on.
As soon as you get anything more concrete to take to the cops, go to the cops.
>like a girl
>start flirting a bit with her
>notice she likes me too now
>immediately lose all in interest in her
This keeps happening, how do I stop this?
>>16953794
Is it sexual interest you're losing or the fun aspect of meeting someone dies quickly
Maybe you like the chase more than the reward it brings
Idk though maybe you're just gay or something
>>16954653
I'm not, I touch my pee pee to pics of women.
Hey /adv/,
I know this really cute girl and I guess we like each other, and I would like to go out with her.
I also live in a place where there are hordes of cock hungry tourists (especially in summer) and I really want to put my dick in as many of them as possible.
I can't decide which I want more and the result is that I do nothing. What do?
>>16953778
Go for cute girl. The tourists aren't even a sure thing.
The only logical answer is that you should kill yourself.
>>16953778
>Cock hungry tourists
dont fill your mind with delusion of grandeur
