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I am wanting some advice to know whether or not I'm being unreasonable or an asshole, and its a pretty complicated situation so please bare with me.
My girlfriend is a self harmer and is often suicidal. I can deal with this, I've been with her for nearly two years and through this whole time I've been nearly her whole support. However, now she is started to take her problems out on me.
It started off as saying I was selfish for focusing on my studies for work, but then it escalated into saying that I am a cunt, and calling me horrible names and fighting with me over nothing every day. After every fight she would apologise, I would forgive her and we would move on, before it happens a few days later again.
Then I had to go away for a week with work, just after she found out that she would have to go to court because she was sexually attacked. This is huge news, yes, but it will be months before she has to go to court. But before I left she was being horrible to me, saying that if I went that she would kill herself because she needed me, that me going and leaving her alone would be the reason she would be dead. One night she wouldn't take her pill because she was so sure she was going to kill herself because I was going. Then I told her that we will have to tell someone, maybe her mum (she lives with her mum) because she needs support, and she told me she would hit me if I told anyone. Then when I tried to leave because she said she would hit me, she slammed the door shut and pushed me back. I shouted "I'm scared, let me go" and she wouldn't, and then she broke into tears and apologised, and as usual, like the faggot I am, I forgave her.
I'm back from my week away now, and although she promised to never be mean again, she called me selfish today because I said she should do some schoolwork. My dad is quite abusive and always used to call me selfish and she knows that's something that really hurts me. Should I leave? Help me /adv/
Leave immediatelly.
>>16995123
But we've been together so long and I love her, and I know that it her depression making her be like this.
I know she will paint me out to be an un-reasonable asshole, and I'll feel like one too
I also had a suicidal gf in the past. Not to this degree but in your case she is mentally unstable and is manipulating you for her comfort. She seems to be going through a lot of hard shit and if you're probably one of the only people she relies on that is also unhealthy. It's really your call on whether or not you want to save yourself because you can't continue to be her support forever. (Even though you love her and mean well..)
You like like a pretty average dude to me. Fair 6.5/10.
Nice OP
I think you are very handsome....!
sweet eyes
Handsome! :3
pic unrelated
I am at lesson at univeristy (colege for americans), at the start of the lesson I asked the substitute prof if I may record the lesson as I always do.
She said a single imperative "No."
Shall I go up to her at the end of the lesson and ask her the specific reason for which I can't record her, as it's a clear mean for me and my classmates to become a better physicians as we can study easier and better?
Or shall I avoid confrontation as she might just be that much of an unreasonable bitch and it would be pointless to argue if not harming (she'll teach us as role teacher in two years time)
Why do you need to record lectures? If you're paying attention, you shouldn't need to. Also it's a matter of copyright and intellectual property, it's not just her being a bitch. Don't just assume she's being retarded when you don't understand the whole situation
>>16995057
OP here
They don't give us anything (some people take photos of the slides), there isn't even a sillabus.
I know taking notes should be enough, but why should I unnecessarily complicate my life?
Give that i miss a word (they speak without microphone) or that they speak too fast.
They don't even tell us which book should we study on. I am honeslty baffled by this as lives will depend on our preparation.
This said, I didn't know lessons were copyrighted. Could you please tell me where this copyright database is? If I am not wrong for something to be copyrighted it must be licensed somewhere.
>>16995065
You're a moron, there is no copyright database. Copyright attaches automatically and doesn't need to be registered or licenced.
How do you explain being NEET for 2 years in an interview?
I feel like I've been unemployed for so long I've been blacklisted and job seeking has become completely pointless. I've no hope left
Depends on why you were a NEET
>>16995014
I've been actively trying to find a job for the past ~21 months without success
Travelled for 3 months before that
>>16995015
Is there any reason why you didn't take up a wageslave job in the meantime?
So I never had a gf, I don't understand why. Do you guys consider me average. Perhaps it's my attitude, but I'm about to be 20 soon.
What can I improve on?
Better pic. Kek.
I am really photogenic and usually put camera too close
>>16994991
you're average
just cheer up a bit
>>16994991
You look like death. I say that because I look like death as well. Only difference is that you look like death if he were finished with a baby. Seriously.
I'm just death coming home from a busy day at work, putting my robe away for the evening to go to bed, if only for a few seconds.
So here's my situation in a nutshell:
>23
>live in canada
>self taught in a lot of things
>fairly intelligent and quick to learn
>no highschool diploma
>cisco cert for networking in homes and small businesses
>NACE L2 coatings inspector certificate
>been working as an entry level accountant/HR for a large company for two years making $17/hr
>stuck in a rut, want to make more money
>locked to this job until I can find another that pays a similar wage due to bills (car, phone, etc)
>dream jobs include writing, singing, and professional driving, all of which I've taught myself to do
I want out but I'm afraid to make the jump. I'm sick of working 60 hours a week and being paid for 40 because I'm a salary employee due to a technicality. My options are limited considering that I have little "formal" training and I have little experience as well.
I could go back to school but how would I pay my bills? I could work as a coatings inspector but finding a position will be hard considering my lack of field experience; the same goes for the networking bit. As for my dream jobs.. well.. they're only dreams.
What should I do? Where can I search for something new?
If all else fails, and you're concerned about paying bills/putting a roof over your head, always consider the military or law enforcement. You will probably want to get a GED first in order to apply. Computer guys are always in demand, so yeah, if you gots skills then I'd say you have a shot.
>>16995008
I've considered both. In order to become anything worthwhile in the military I would need a degree. Unless, of course, I wanted to join as an NCO.
As for law enforcement - same deal. I would need a degree or university credit hours in certain classes in addition to a police studies university course.
I also have a moral conflict of interest here because:
a) I'd consider myself anti-establishment.
2) I like drugs. A lot. I'm not into any HEAVY shit mind you, but I do enjoy smoking pot and taking the occasional psychedelic.
>>16995031
Forces will fund your degree and school you at RMC in Ontario.
Hear me out /adv/, bellow is a very long post so if you dont feel like reading, just scroll away.
In case you wanna try and read all that shit I wrote, here are some background trying to explain why certain options (like just get a gf, just be yourself, just get a job) are unavailable to me.
Since I can remember I've been a reject, bullied and ostracised, even as young as 4 year old.
When I was 9 I though I was under some spell because I read in on of those old "magic" mags that if people hate man for no reason it can be a spell and call a medium to get rid of it, the concept of mental issues was unknown to me at the time so I went with a spell.
I would always get into troubles and did stupid shit because I didn't know how world works (I grow up being mostly alone and rid of meaningful human contact so many things were and are unfamiliar to me [you should have see me trying to use a subway for the first time at the age of 23])
In schools I've been bullied, called names and beaten by kids and teachers as well, for being a retard.
>1/5
>>16994909
When I was 12 I got into mental institution for observation, released after 7 days with no clear diagnosis.
Doc just said "if his behaviour continues it could be schizophrenia", personally I think its because shit like autism or adhd or anything to do with mental development was an alien concept in post soviet mental institutions at the time and schizo was the easiest diagnosis they could come up with.
During life I would got few more generic diagnosis from various shrinks, mostly general stuff like split personality, adhd, schizoid personality, etc, nothing definite though.
I guess I am just a retard after all.
I changed like 11 schools from most of those I got an opinion that I am "an idiot unable to function in society".
It was kinda hopeless at some point, I mean every new school or place, I would try to fit in with the kids and fail completely, it always went exactly same way.
I go to a new school, I try to get together with everyone, girls are interested in me, dudes are ok then after a few months something changes and after half a year everyone pretty much hate me for being an obnoxious retard or something.
No idea why it went that way but every single school was the same, when I was going to my last one, eleventh school, there was this one time when girls would surround me after school as would always happen in the beginning (I wasnt bad looking at the time) complement me on smart and look and humour and it hurt because I knew how this was going to end.
I've been trough this already 10 times, kinda painful to be honest.
I just ask half-jokingly "How do you know I am even that great as you say, you know me for couple of weeks at best, how do you know you wont hate me at the end of the year"
They asked me why I would even think that, no way they would ever hated me, well, what do you know, half year later I was outcast once again.
>2/5
>>16994913
Because I would run away from schools trough my whole life (cant really stay in place where you are bullied daily), I graduated high school at the age of 23 (5 years older than anyone else.
I often wouldnt go to school because I couldnt force myself.
During my high school I started having issues being among people, since I lived next to the highschool I would just go to it and would go home instantly after it.
During breaks I would have to go far away from highschool because being inside was very stressful to me and would wait till the bell rung before going inside to minimise chance of being bullied or just being among people.
Because of that I was constantly late and would miss aprox 300 classes during my year, no need to tell you that because of that I would get tons of shit from teachers and tons of shit from kids for not being in class and yet somehow getting decent marks, they though I was getting premium treatment or something.
Sometimes my teachers would talk shit about me how fat I've become or how annoying I am or how weird my sense of fashion is, sometimes it was to my face, most often than not it was when I wasn't in class.
Later kids liked to just turn to me during slow classes just to repeat it all in my face, what was told about me by teacher and students and observe my reaction.
I got note from a shrink to limit my stress in class and that note was given to teachers when I was starting school but it didnt looked like they ever cared.
Because I was sleeping in classes most of the time I would get also lot of shit from teachers and kids, I think it was stress because I could sleep like 16 hours after a bad day at school.
Sometimes I would get bullied by kids I didnt even know, just because my mother was working in that school as a teacher and yes, we are still talking about a person 5-7 years older than kids that bullied me (they were often bigger than me but I think the real problem was inside my head and not in physical capabilities)
>3/5
>>16994916
When I finally graduated highschool I just went home and stopped going out altogether, sometimes I would leave when I needed to get to a doctor or sign a paper, otherwise I would spend all my time in my room since 2008.
During this time I was too depressed to do anything, I didnt pick any useful skills, I didnt learn anything, I cant even read a book because I can spend many hours on one page, I read sometimes manga or watch a movie or play a game on emulator but cant say I am enjoying it very much.
I am supported by a single mother, since I dont need anything but food I guess it is possible for her to support me.
>4/5
Would you consider my face delicate & dainty or would you say it's striking & strong in my features?
>>16994835
Quite dainty for a trap
>>16994835
I'd say it's kind of upside down
You look like a male from this picture with make up on. Looks bony and masculine.
does this happen to anyone else?
so I fell in love with a girl and later realized it was the worst decision. my gf has massive mental issues, cries a lot, is high maintenance and very difficult and on top of that she isn't that pleasant, demands a lot, is incredibly needy and high maintenance, uses my money, doesn't put out that much, and is fat and not that attractive.
She's hysterical about something once a week, is suicidal every 4 months. After a year of this it becomes draining and incredibly taxing on a man's emotional health. The relationship revolves around her issues.
recently she was suicidal and i had to spend 5 days with her 24/7 to make sure she doesn't kill herself and once she was fine she basically told me to leave because she needed some alone time. I was really bothered by this. Then she was in a funk and I tried to get her out of the house because she hadn't left in days and she was being a fucking an idiot and wouldn't even make an effort to help herself despite me helping her and trying to get her some fresh air and when she finally did leave the house to go out we got in an argument.
>>16994817
is that her? good god she sounds like a nightmare
A few days ago I become incredibly depressed, rethought my life including my relationship and was incredibly repulsed by her. So I became distant and kinda ignored her only sending 3 word replies for 3 days. This caused my crazy gf to freak out. She kept asking me if I was going to break up with her and I said no. It wasn't on purpose and I told her I was fine several times but she picked up on it. She called my hysterical and sad saying I shouldn't do this to her and I should apologize for ignoring her and making her feel terrible.
I feel bad about it. I don't want to make her sad. but at the same time I have a difficult time apologizing for my resent towards her actions. I don't see why I should apologize for being depressed and needing some time away from her. At times I feel she's suffocating and need to be away from her, the resentment builds up.
This whole thing got way bigger and she is VERY upset and she's framing me as the bad guy. She's crying like crazy on the phone asking me to please apologize
What should I do?
>>16994817
Jesus
Break up with her. She's not your problem.
If she threatens to kill herself, call her parents, 'x keeps threatening to kill herself if I break up with her. I feel trapped and I need your help'
But DESU just cut her off.
I'm 20. Virgin. Never had a girlfriend.
I have a job, nice car, take care of myself, have things going on in my life.
I'm confident in myself.
I've been on dates but can never seem to seal the deal.
Plenty of people my age and younger can seem to be able to pull it off.
It's getting pretty frustrating.
And I know being 20 and kissless doesn't seem so absurd, but I can totally see how this can get out of hand.
I honestly don't even have a question for you /adv/.
I just need some reassurance that It's still possible for me to experience love, sex, and all those things before I become a pitiful 40 year old virgin.
Perhaps I'm looking for company more than anything. Any similar situations? Any stories of hope?
Also any general advice on dating would be appreciated. Thanks.
ok, lets talk. u willing to show what u look like, firstly..? we gotta make sure you do in fact take care of yourself.
secondly, 20 isn't such a big deal, these days, surprisingly. You have to be comfortable with this fact before you can move on. You have nothing to worry about. what's the farthest you've gotten with a girl? Just making sure before any advice is given on 'sealing the deal'.
'Dates' are also not the best way to get laid. In fact, it's pretty damn rare for first dates depending on how well you know the person. Sometimes drunken hookups from people you meet at bars are the best way to have no strings sex. Or do you particularly care about your first time being special? Do you want a relationship with the first person you bone..?
...tell us more, anon
I can see you giving it up to a hot older gal who really just gets off on the fact that you're young and inexperienced. That whole untainted thing really does it for some people. Just wear rubbers man.
I guess, dude, just try not to think about it too much -- you're puttin the cart before the horse. Maybe stop trying to get laid and just try to have successful dates -- don't feel entitled to anything, just be sweet and flirty and aloof all at the same time, and try to get in a kiss at a romantic moment.
I know finding that right moment can be difficult -- you'll be putting a lot of pressure on yourself. Just know, that nervousness you feel, every man has gone through. That said, if you have your date laughing, or if she seems super interested in you, or if she touches you a lot, these are all good signs but they dont necessarily mean squat! So don't get disappointed at rejection -- women can be unknowable and crazy.
But if you DO see these good signs, and near the end of your date you're able to casually suggest an activity that would get you two alone (not in a creepy way, maybe just on a walk, or alone in a booth at a bar, or, shit, just dropping her off at the end of the night) and she accepts this activity that would put the two of you alone, that's a good sign. Wait for a comfortable moment, maybe if you're making a lot of eye contact, or you happen to be close, say something sweet or do something that you know she appreciates about you. Make her laugh again or compliment her in a unique way. Then try to kiss her. It's hard to do sometimes; you won't always be able to tell if she wants you to kiss her, but when you DO know for sure it will be obvious. If it's awkward, e.g. you're in the car and about to drop her off, try to keep the conversation about how much you enjoyed spending time with her, etc... don't get side trekked into conversation that will make it hard to, say, park outside her house, and try to kiss her.
>>16994801
I've never kissed a girl. Never been further than a first date.
I want a relationship. Hook ups are not what I'm after at all.
I come from a background of young long lasting marriages and see that as perfectly attainable.
Trust the fact I've been called attractive "cute" many times, not boasting here. I dress and groom well.
/adv/ I nees your help on sex alternatives.
I don't think that I'm going to be getting much sex because I recently tried with my girlfriend for the third time or something like that, and I just couldn't fit. We used lube, toys and a ton of foreplay but just not happening. What are some things that are equally sexually gratifying?
>pic unrelated
>asks for sex help
>posts a plant's picture
>pic unrelated
And here I was, thinking you were trying to fuck a plant
I'm in the same boat as you OP, it sucks. I suppose grinding is pretty good though. Is she a virgin?
top kek breh
>19
>m
>lost friends due to pessimism
>it's part of my humor
>lowest of low rate girls on /b/
>lastcigar.webm
>current longest friends only hangout with me for an hour before ejecting
>is avid gamer/4channer..¿?
TL;DR
How do I stop being pessimistic?
+
How do you build trust when people ever wish to see you an hour every other day..?
Certainly I need new friends... But most people I meet are always extremely uninterested.
>I have been told that I am boring
>expect me to know what fun is when no one wants to around *pulls trigger*
Kek. Avid gamer and wtv tf s a 4channer. Kek.
Death comes at price, but it sure ass hell is fun! You should try it OP.
>>16994647
RIP OP. If dubs faggot OP does a flip.
I'm 19, live with my parents, suffer from what's likely genetic anxiety, or PTSD. I don't want to talk about the PTSD. My symptoms have been on and off really badly this year, and I don't have a clue why.
I just got done crying, and I'm on that very thin line between getting temporarily better, and getting annihilated and being completely unable to function or even possibly feel happy for an undetermined amount of time.
I think the worst part is that I'm alone from 2am to 4pm. I work at 5pm, and I don't get home until around the time my parents are already long in bed. It's awful, I have nobody to talk to.
Anybody try medication? I had Sertraline(Zoloft), but it stopped working, and only gave me the longest period of anxiety/depression of my life.
Build muscle, it will help even out your moods.
>>16994623
>I had Sertraline(Zoloft), but it stopped working, and only gave me the longest period of anxiety/depression of my life.
I hope you talked to your psychiatrist about this instead of just going off the meds, there are many different medications to treat this and they can try different ones until something works.
>>16994758
No, my PD tried putting me on 10mg of Paroxetine, and I said fuck that. Eventually, I did get better, but now it's back.
I'm mostly afraid that I'm not going to be able to stand being at work. Depression/anxiety makes time crawl something awful. If I go back, I'll just bs it and say it didn't work. Hopefully it doesn't get to that point. What meds have helped you handle the symptoms? I'm trying to exercise, but it couldn't stop it this time.
Guys I'm really lost in my life
I don't really enjoy going to uni, I get really bad waves of depression, I have no friends and am slowly distancing from my family. No job either even for the summer, I just don't really know what I should do. My grades are abysmal but my past semesters should keep me high enough to not fail out this semester. But I am REALLY lost and I just don't know what to do at all. I just spend every day trying to escape with videogames, movies, music, reading
I just don't feel any purpose or passion and haven't for years.
Does anybody who has been in a similar situation have any advice or help? I've tried making changes before but that never works without responsibility.
I'm in a similar problem, but not too exact. Someone give us their thoughts =)
>>16994600
50-60% of the board, the post
That is why I'm here right now; you sound like where I expect to be in 6-8 months. Everyone tells me I'm smart and I can usually learn anything I want as long as it interests me (I usually absorb myself into something wholly and completely). Problem is, nothing interests me and I'm going to college to "figure things out". All I guess I want is for people to get off my back and to feel like I'm living life, free. But the few jobs I work make me feel awful; I don't just want to grind to live to sleep to grind and etc.
Probably just came out as tldr bullshit, but I felt like venting.
I like that my partner looks at loli. I look at his history and get off to the things he's found.
It's turned into somewhat of a kink in and of itself...how awful am I?
I suppose it'd be better if I just asked him to share pictures he likes with me..
>>16994591
>how awful am I?
You're not harming anyone.
>>16994591
Why not? Just tell him you like it too and you get to connect over a shared intimate interest.
>>16994591
This has to be bait.
If not, just talk to him about it. If anything, that'll turn him on even more. He can't tell you that he's disgusted or whatever because he does the exact same shit.
