ive known a few people with pretty dark humor usually dead baby jokes and abortion jokes.

What's black and white and red all over?

I don't really find those kinds of jokes all that funy more of just shock humor.

read buzzfeed to balance it out. buzzfeed is fucking stupid but they at least have 5 things a day i'll find entertaining. their voice speaks to the young liberal masses. you'll at least understand what other people find entertaining.

Buzzfeed will only make you mad at the world once you view their stuff through 4chan lenses.
If you really spent the last seven years on here, you're probably beyond repair. I only started going here at age 16 (now 20) and even I sometimes catch myself thinking like a /pol/tergeist or /b/tard.
Just enjoy the ride man. It has its upsides too.
Read some humanist/positivist philosophy maybe.

>Lurking for 7 years
>Only visited 3 boards
Christ, spend some time on other boards. They're not all like /b/ and /r9k/. Shitholes like /co/ are downright more SJW than Tumblr.

Y: The Last Man is such a shitty comic. So shitty. Megg Mogg and Owl is even more terrible. Fuck /co/ so god damn much.

>>17180113
>How would you guys handle this kind of woman?
Man up and ask her out.
Women want a man that is better than them. If a woman is very successful in her job, there aren't very many men above her that are available (since many are with hot, young, but not accomplished women).
Some of those women become bitter old cat women, but the smart ones pick a guy who does something "manly" but not necessarily professional. A college professor I know married a fireman, a doctor...
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>>17180141
From what I've read I feel like hes got a 90% chance of getting shut down.

You know this girl sounds awesome but let me ground you back to reality. Most women are looking for men who are either better or of equal footing than themselves. The reality of it is that, most people end up with people of relative success. Leagues aren't complete bullshit, thats why we still throw that term around even tho nobody seems to hesitate to say that they aren't real. They're real.

But, I would...
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>>17180141
I think it's pretty much over. Back then, she would contact me once a month but now, even if I initiate a little more than I should, she never initiates anything except wishing me happy new year...woo hoo. I never acted like a complete beta but deep inside, I knew she was too much for me and I did everything I could to try to cure my social shortcomings. I read books, videos, gathered a lot of knowledge of successful people and even read The Red Pill which to some extent helped me but even after all that, I...
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nah i feel what you're saying

bring it up to him but try not to be confrontational
he might not necessarily realize why it's wrong
that'll come through quickly in a convo

>>17180106
Guy here.
He's in the wrong.
Unless you two are married, he has no control over whether you go out. Of course, if you fuck some guy from the club, it is your fault the relationship is over.
If you're married, then you both have control over each other.

>>17180123
He'll say, why can't I go with you? And he'll get somewhat upset about it. He acts like we are married but he's aware that we're not. Our beliefs are completely different & he always tells me "I think different from other people".

did you have intercourse? if yes, is your dick fine? if yes you are probably fine

either way you're probably fine but better to be safe than sorry

might be a good idea.

>>17180103
I didn't penetrate her vagina, but she sucked it and I used my fingers and my tongue, I get tested pretty regularly (every month unless I don't have sex that month).

I think I might do that just to make sure, might do it soon. Just this WebMD-tier shit is telling me I have AIDS and it's getting me paranoid as fuck

you love your parents don't you?

>>17180075
Having an agreement on a common goal?

If I've learned anything from this shit board is that most of us say, "I love you, " only because we wish we did. Imo, the feeling of true love is very rare, and it's a culmination of interpersonal, emotional, financial, hierarchial, and sexual factors that intertwine into a feeling of determination and belonging. It's having that, "I'm 1 million percent sure you are the only one for me and I'm 1 million percent sure if you accept...
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>>17180075
You can't love because your heart is black and your spirit corpulent, fat and sickly.

This is true of most humans in history.

you need rehab. just bite the bullet and do it.

>>17180081
yeah op nip it before it gets worse

>>17180073
Sounds like you are partying harder than you probably should, and I say that as a a barely-functional alcoholic and addict. I suggest you just quit the drugs for a long time--give yourself a year. Cold turkey, no excuses. Then decide if you want to stay off forever or try again. Chances are good you will fall right back into patterns you don't like, which means you should almost certainly leave that shit alone forever.

You shouldn't drink so much, either (trust me). That way lies sadness. But probably...
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>>17180027
Could be he doesn't trust your friend and doesn't want you to end up in a shitty situation without anyone else.

...could just be cause you have plans too?

He knows your friend wants to become a cock pincushion and your proximity puts you at risk.

>>17180027
>she wants me to go with her alone with our group of friends

what the fuck does this mean

>>17180016
I have no advice anon. I feel the same way. I won't do it because i dont want to hurt my family. Im sorry we feel this way

medication can take a while to work.

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>>17180016
Maybe you can find a sense of duty.
That's what's kept me going after losing everything else.
Duty to other people, to those left behind, to the world in general.

You should keep up the status quo with her. But keep your expectations low. If I were you, I'd chase after other girls while keeping up with her. That way even if she doesn't break up with her boyfriend, you wouldn't have wasted too much time.

You're being an "emotional whore". She's just using you to get the gratification that she's not getting in her current relationship. If you want to be friends with her, that's all well and good, but if she wanted to date you, she would've already.

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>>17179965
That's a fair point, and I'm trying to avoid the oneitis. But like I said, she ticks a lot of the ideal mate boxes. Plus, being an introverted socially awkward semi-shut in makes it difficult to meet women.

do you have any proof?

you must have too must time on your hands to really give a fuck.

>>17179940
Why do you loath them?
How do you know they are commiting fraud?

Because the kind of revenge you're likely thinking of has a significant drawback: it ends far too quickly. You will not find it satisfying.

Revenge is a vicious cycle just like violence. It usually never stops. Of course if you can get away with it without it coming back to you that's another story. Even so it's still not worth it. Have some character and just get over it. Move on with your life and forget about it. Doing petty things makes you a petty person and it's not a good character trait.

"The sweetest revenge is living well. Darius Rucker said it, so you know it's real"

If you let them affect your life that means they won. Just ignore them, they are not even worth one second of your time whether on good intentions or bad.

give her something from confucius or sun tzu or someone known for better things than mao
or don't, i know nothing about your situation
best of luck

isn't that for communist. So your basically saying she's a communist.

>>17179918
get her a dog and a cookbook

Kill him you fag

>>17179944
So helpful

Bump for opie

>>17179885
You went to law school? I'm sorry.

Always end with a question.
She wants you to drive the conversation.

>>17179946
God, yeah, texting is annoying like that, you gotta give people a way to continue the conversation.