Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 605. page
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People, who've graduated university, does life gets a lot harder after that? How did you motivate yourself to succeed?
How do you cope, for what reason do you tolerate everything?
Only reasoning you need is, do I live in the dirt or in a home with food, no other thought needed
Immediately after was incredibly hard. I couldn't get a job for 6 months and I was sleeping on my mother's couch. I had no friends, spent all day on my own, and was extremely isolated.
I hadn't prepared properly for after university and my family are a bunch of deadbeats that live in the countryside that couldn't help me in the slightest. I was wildly applying for jobs even though I had 0 experience in anything and nobody bothered to reply even after hundreds of applications.
I then said fuck it and moved to my brother's couch in the big city. I got a minimum wage job at a department store where I was the only English employee and I got bullied like crazy and I had to do shift work so that I was finishing at midnight and starting again at 6am.
So eventually I said fuck it and went on welfare which turned out to be a godsend. They paid my way for a few months with no pressure on me for the first time in a while and I got on a scheme to start my own business.
Now about 3 years after graduating I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. I work to my own schedule and I'm not surrounded by cunts anymore.
>>17211037
I experienced something similar.
Even though I tried my best to get experience in accounting, the fact of the matter is that most firms recruit from their summer intern pool (which I didn't undertake due to poor planning at Uni).
So I started my applications in the lastish semester, big mistake. Que me having to move back with my family and sending out 100+ applications only to get five interviews. The situation in our state was really shitty, as the government had just cut thousands of public servants so there was a surplus of white collar workers about.
I cried some days. I really did.
But then one day I got the call. I got the job. It was for something I had applied for months earlier, a government position (gov always takes their time).
Now I'm going on my third year with that place, and things are pretty good. Work is interesting, the pay is excellent for my grade, and I can fully support myself.
That said, yes - life does get harder after uni. You'll be stressed and tested in ways you though you couldn't have, especially when studying at the professional level.
But you know what? You've already proven yourself this far by doing a degree. It's a similar jump from being in highschool and going to uni; you just need to apply yourself, and ask for help if you need it.
>have been chatting to an internet frned for 2 years
>only recenttly i will happen to visit his country so we are considering a meetup
>am a girl
>he said he is very inactive on facebook and he never uses it
>i asked him for his facebook as my parents may want to see it
>he gve me his facebook
>he only has one friend on facebook
>asked him about it and he said he met that girl online and he didnt add any of his other friends as he never thought of using his fb account
>he said he met the girl on 7cupss website and said he shared his facebook to talk to her
should i cancel my idea to meet him? I have video skyped with him before, but I've seen people catfishing others on skype videos (ive heard of ppl pretending to be justinbiber on skype videos to troll his fans)
Dont go. A guy should always come to you first imo.
7cupss is chinese
What country are you from? Is he in china?
>>17210853
no i am from hongkon he isspanish
too expensive for him to flyhere
i mistyped the name with an extra "s"
>>17210858
Then he is not financially stable enough for you anyways. Redflag
And 7cups is for therapy and counceling.
Hes unstable. BIG red flag.
No, dont do it. You can find someone else if you want something in person, physical. But dont fly half way around the world by yourself unless you know that person is stable, financially, mentally.
I'll keep it brief /adv/:
So, I'm in a relationship with a Chinese girl. I like her a lot, she's sweet, kind, attractive and interesting in terms of hobbies and so on.
The thing is, there's a part of me that feels less comfortable with her than with a white girl. I can't quite explain it because it's this weird, gut, somewhat intangible feeling. Somehow being with a white girl, doing romantic things together, sleeping together and cuddling up together afterwards just feels more "natural".
I also can't escape from the feeling that I'm somehow betraying my own people in some way by being in this relationship. Whites are headed towards minority status in virtually every formerly white-majority country on earth, and by being a part of this relationship and having kids with her, I'd be contributing to that process.
What should I do? If your response is some canned spiel about racism you've internalized from the media, fuck off, I'm not interested.
If you're not comfortable, you're not comfortable. That's really all there is to it. You're probably not going to get more comfortable with it with time. How 'unwhite' is she?
Kek, racist.
>>17210823
Well. she's asian. It's not like she can't speak English or anything if that's what you are referring to.
How do I piss people off at comic con?
By swallowing bleach
>>17210760
No that would make people happy nobody likes me hence why I want to piss people off
why are you trying to piss people off
/adv/, why the only thing that motivates me to do shit is merchandise?
I search for it for hours and months, but it doesn't make me feel better for more than 4 seconds. Then I try to move to the next one.
Info about me:
A loner with few friends and the only close one a school classmate is living too far way to meet often. Early 20s, university, motivation is either zero or stated above.
Kinda ditched one circle of friends before, because I changed, they changed and it felt really forced. Still lonely after that.
The personal growth sites claim that you love fandom merch too much, because you don't love yourself. How is it possible and how do i shift my focus to healthy goals?
What do i do, /adv/, I literally want to earn money in life, only because I can buy consoles, vidya and merchandise.
I am a failure and can't find a reason to live, besides media worshipping.
It is possibly not loving yourself. It's part of impulsivity that only feeds the production of serotonin for immediate reward of buying something. You lose yourself in the merch. Instead of living a 'fulfilled' life aren't you just buying your way into a fantasy life of collectibles that get you closer to your favorite IPs.?
You could do the research and apply it to yourself rather than a product you consume. What your strengths are, weaknesses. Make long term and short term goals (S.m.a.r.t. Goals as they are also called). Like get a job, or a hobby that gets you active with people of similar interests to yours.
>>17210797
Thanks for replying, anon.
There are some goals, but the only thing that motivates me to do them is that I'll buy vidya afterwards.
About hobbies, I only want to draw fan art. Or sculpt/papercraft figurines.
I won't call myself suicidal, but I don't see a point in existing, if you don't escape from reality as much as possible.
hi
I'm 19 y old and never had a girlfriend. I have no idea on how to interact and make friendly relation with a girl. Assuming that to start any relationship should be good friends and I just cant take the first step .. it is already making me sad and needy. I do not consider myself a bad or ugly person, but I'm very apathetic.
Its very sad to see couples in love and you're a lonely guy ... it's sad.
How to overcome it?
Give a girl gifts to improve the possibilities to have success in the date :v
>>17210737
but I even go to date
You're 19. You're still a kid. Focus on becoming an adult first and learning how to function in the world. Girls will follow.
I want to be successful like you normies. Can you please help me? I've allowed robots to taint my heart and think all women are dumb sluts looking for the guy with the biggest cock in the room.
I'm an uneducated 21 KHV 5'9 NEET with zero friends and acquaintances. If anyone could hand me a blue pill, I'd appreciate it. I need help and I can't afford a psychiatrist. My parents are ashamed of what I've become and they're honestly sick and tired of me living in their house. I don't want to be a nuisance to them anymore. I want to be successful but it seems like I need friends or at least know people to land a job. I have zero social skills, all my life I've been alone. No one ever wanted to be my friend, even when I tried they didn't like the way I came off because I was always labeled the loser at school. It's time to get over it and try again, being an indoor shut in for the past 21 years of my life haven't helped me whatsoever. but the thing is If I had a solution I would have broken out of my shell a long time ago the thing is people don't like me because I'm a weird person, I don't talk about anything because hardly anything interest me, or I'm jsut too stupid to return a comment. People have trouble relating to me and vise versa, I want to be successful. I really do, but I don't know if I can accomplish anything by myself. I feel completely useless and even tho there are escape routes to my situation my mind and body run back at the thought of experiences life.
My perception of the world was created due to how people perceived me in the past followed by the continuation assumption that they hated me, so I hate them back.
HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Typical you stupid normies jsut have this fucking board to talk about mundane problems even a 12 year old can solve. YOU"RE ALL USELESS
The first step is wanting to improve. You have some of that already. Next, do something that you can feel good about that will bring positive change. Go out for a jog. Learn a new skill. Look for jobs.
>be me, 26
>duchenne muscular dystrophy
>life expectancy 25
>deteriorating at a fast pace
>really bad now, 100% chance i dont make it to july
is there anything i need to do before i go? not that i can even get up from my chair, im pretty much paralyzed and hooked up to a machine that helps me clear out my lungs
Damn this makes me feel sad feels.
I'd probably try some hard drugs and opiates personally, because I'm always too scared to do them because I want to live long.
Might be cool since you don't have a choice anyway
Or you could meet a qt patient and fall in love like those teeny bopper books
>>17210703
Have you invite a grill over for casual sex then fisted her out of nowhere yet?
>>17210705
I just might. All I've done is weed.
>>17210707
Nah dude. In a wheelchair since 12 years old. Harshly bullied before that for walking weird. People aren't very comfortable being friends with someone with a terminal genetic disease. I can't even move my arms to fap properly anymore.
I sleep for 12 hours a day and I'm still sleepy and lethargic when I get up. I know too much sleep is bad for you, but I can't help it. I set alarms and instinctively hit the dismiss button and roll right back to sleep. Is there something mentally wrong with me? Physically? Help me.
>>17210623
I have this problem is well, but for me its been since I was a baby.
What is your diet like anon? Do you eat well or garbage? Do you have a lot of stressors?
>>17210623
Could be depression or chronic fatigue. Before I started medicine, I would sleep for 12-16hrs a day and still be exhausted. I would force myself to stay awake, but it never got better on its own.
>>17210623
done this shit for the last 4+ years.
trying doing something before you go to bed like a light jog, i just did this not 30 mins ago and i'll sleep alot better.
could be multiple problems for me its depression and the general stuff
I'm in my last year of high school and a guy friend asked me out to a school formal-like event. I have a boyfriend who's in uni. Is it ok for me to go to the event with my male friend? How should I ask my boyfriend if it's all good with him?
link
just ask him
>hey a friend asked me to go to this formal school event, is that ok?
what is the event? like a dance?
>>17210616
just a social. hanging around and chatting and probably a bit of dancing.
I can only orgasm when my boyfriend goes down on me and when we have sex. We're in a LDR so we don't have sex often. I can't orgasm when I masturbate, I got a vibrator and I still can't cum. I watch porn, we've had skype sex, I just can't get myself off unless we are together. What's the deal
pretty funny considering its usually the other way around
anyway, maybe you need a stronger vibrator? what do you currently have? My gf has like 3
What part does he lick? If you can do the same stimulation by yourself but nothing, it must be you require both close physical and emotional connection to orgasm. Pretty sweet actually. If you can find your G spot that might work though,
Aum shanti shanti
>>17210789
As if one vibrator isn't bad enough already.
So today I went to a local store to exchange an item and the girl who helped me was extremely cute and kept asking me things like what I did and where I lived, etc. The process took about 30 minutes because we had to test some things but she seemed fairly interested.. I didn't make a move or anything because she did have like some type of a band on her finger.
When I got home I looked up her name (from her nametag) + the store she worked at and found her profile on FB. (is that weird?).
She seems to be in a relationship but I don't think she's engaged, would it be weird if I messaged her or added her?
That puppy is probably blind
bump, halp.
The fact that she didn't tell you her name or she didn't ask would make it seem weird. I wouldn't do it. Move on.
So help me /adv.
I currently suffer under major mood swings, ranging from barely feeling indifferent to anything to actually being pissed off at everything.
Call it depression.
Thing is life is better than ever before, I managed to pull myself out of a giant hole, yet im more depressed than before.
I stopped being a neet shut in, am /fit, stopped abusing the shit out of weed/alcohol, lost my virginity, started dating, got a secondary job, found a group of (best) friends and so on.
But I lost my ambition, my drive, my desire.
Im lost, I don't do things because I WANT to do them, I do them because I know they are objectively the right thing to do.
But I don't draw any pleasure out of it living like that.
I've actually lost my libido despite recently losing my virginity, there is just no desire.(I do get wood/get off no problem) but I could go without fapping for a month if I don't remind me to do it.
So, any advice? Self help book recommendations?
Pic unrelated
No one?!
>>17210547
>210547 [Reply]▶
>So help me /adv.
bump
...Is that a real tweet?
My girlfriend and I are staying with my folks to save some money before our baby is born, my oldest brother lives here and has never moved out, has no friends etc. One day my gf was in the kitchen an started to cry asking him why hasnt he shown interest in his niece, he replies "the baby is still inside you?" and she got really hurt and told him to fuckoff and he answered by yelling at her saying" fuck you and fuck your daughter". I instinctively almost fought him but my gf kept me from it, The balls to say that about my unborn daughter to the woman i love. I just dont know if I can ever forgive him for it. Part of me feels bad for not hitting him, but thats not gonna solve shit. I dont want his misery to ruin my gf's comfortability
>>17210423
>my gf was in the kitchen an started to cry asking him why hasnt he shown interest in his niece
He obviously doesn't care about this baby, so why would she start this shit with him? Especially by telling him to fuck off. If I lived with someone who was like that, I'd avoid them. Also, is she going to talk like that around the baby when it's born
>he replies "the baby is still inside you?"
To be honest, that's pretty funny.
>I dont want his misery to ruin my gf's comfortability
He has more of a right to live under that roof than she does
>>17210439
I paraphrased for length and no he does not but I dont really have the time to explain that much
>>17210450
What? That doesn't answer anything.
Why aren't you having interracial sex, anon?
i stopped trying to claim i gave a shit about race and realized my type is skinny nerdy white chicks with long brown hair
I am though, lots of it.
>>17210359
