Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 612. page
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this girl wants to come to my house to swim at my pool and hangout. two weeks ago she sent me pics of her pussy and made some big hints that she wanted to fuck
are my chances of getting pussy high?
Are you retarded?
Of course she wants to fuck
>>17207474
This
>>17207469
Make sure you bring your laptop into the pool so you can get real time advice OP!
so you know how girls with no-personality always say shit like "my smile is always fake" "im (not) fine :)" "I'm antisocial xD books and netflix lel"
yknow???
Anyway. How would you roast them? I usually say "wow that's such a deep quote, where'd u see that, Facebook?"
>weak roast, kms
so ye roast these thots along the lines of being "fake deep"
Need to be 18 to be on this site.
>>17207345
m8 there are literally 30 something year olds who pull this shit
like white mums who got left by their ex named joey and are generally promiscuous and on a steady slope to alcoholism
lol op
you might THINK you sound like a 2honest4u badass but in reality you're a walking cringe fest at best and just unpleasant to be around at worst. you lack a personality just the same as the people you're making epik burnz about.
just stop while you're ahead. you'll thank me later.
My gf keeps taking selfies, her mobile phone is full of them, she just keeps them for herself and sometimes send them to me.
Is that a sign of insecurity? I think I never took a selfie in my entire life.
It could be just caught up in the fad. I saw a group in the middle of a crosswalk trying to take a self-shot photo of the gate behind them.
I see people taking them wherever they go. I think it can be a bit of narcissism, but ultimately and probably just capturing every mundane part of her life. Like a photo journal or somthing. Being vain and shit like that.
I have the answer!! She's a girl. That's what they do. And yes she's a girl she's insecure about her looks. Your job is to make her feel she's pretty, but she'll take selfies and think she's ugly just the same. Don't over think it.
What percentage of her selfies involve duck face?
So I've been dating this girl for like 8 months now, and I'm starting to feel uneasy about the fact that she texts one of her friends all day every day.
From what she's said they talk about purely platonic things, like movies music food whatever. She says he dates girl off and on. But let's be real here. I never met a straight dude that talks to a girl every day purely for the stimulating conversation.
The thing is the guy goes to school in a different city but he's in our town for the summer. He invited her to a graduation party of a friend of his but she didn't go. I'm like mildly stressed out
Am I being an overreacting jealous faggot? Should I care about this? I mean I trust her, but I can't help but feel hurt and uneasy sometimes. Especially when the she texts him even when I'm there and also late at night. I've brought this up before and she said she understands where I'm coming from and says she doesn't text him late at night anymore. Whether or not it's true idk. But I just want to hear your guys opinion on this since I know I'm not the only one to go through something like this.
How's the sex?
>>17206830
pretty bomb if I do say so. she gives bjs like hot cakes. she's even been dying to have me put it in her butt recently
>>17206835
Then stick with her.
>The quality of the sex is the best metric of the relationship.
how to last longer in sex
i usually fuck for like 15 minutes, which seems kinda acceptable
but i havent been able to improve since that
i have no problems getting hard and ive never had premature ejaculation problems i just want to know how to improve
should my masturbatory habits mimic the kind of sex i want?
will masturbating with a steady pace without stoping result in longer lasting in bed?
experiences?
has anyone ever gone from being regular at sex to being very good?
i tried asking my girlfriend what she likes but she says that if she told me it would ruin the experience, so from her reaction i assume she likes hard pumps as constant and lasting as possible
Kegel exercises
Girls tell me after 20 minutes of insertion they get chafed and uncomfortable.
>>17206778
>should masturbatory habits mimic the kind of sex you want
Absolutely
>will masturbating with a steady pace without stopping result on lasting longer in bed
I've heard edging works well but anything that helps you learn more about how your body works so that you will have more control over your actions is good.
>has anyone ever gone from being regular at sex to being very good?
you will learn more things over time which will both help you figure out how things with you and your partner work best, in this case lasting longer. chances are you're bad in bed. it can only get better from here
I recently was told by my friends that I would be a perfect match for a sociopath, because we were discussing how I want someone who's cut, dry and to the point when it comes to relationships. As in
>Not afraid to say "This is bothering me. Cut it the fuck out."
>"For us to work out, I need x, are we able to make that work?"
>Not afraid to tell me that she needs her space, fully capable of being told that I need my own space.
>Emotionally invested, but not necessarily emotional.
>The kind of "I don't care what others think of me, except a few specific people like close friends/significant others" mentality.
>Not afraid to call others out on things if it's wrong.
>Confident/Despotic
While not all of these traits fall under the textbook definition of sociopath, I've had another friend tell me that I would work well with a "defrosted ice queen"
>Is it wrong that I know where they're coming from based on my own personality, and that I actually desire someone with that kind of personality?
None of these traits are sociopathic. The word sociopath is made of socio (society) and pathos (illness) and refers to the extreme antisocial behavior of a deranged person that actively hurts society. Being communicative, direct and brutally honest is not being a sociopath. You can find all of these qualities in a perfectly normal and sane person. I think what you want is fine and I hope you find someone that matches your preferences.
I don't think that sociopathic behaviour at all....
Can we please stop this retarded obsession with sociopaths Jesus Christ fucking teeny boopers these days
>break up with ex of three years, two whole freaking years ago
>I was the one who was a mess and handled it like a pathetic beta
>she seemingly moved on just fine
>there's this great girl in my life now, but hung up on the fact that she's much less attractive than my ex
>still feel like I have something to prove and want to show ex I found much better than her, but this girl's looks are holding me back
It's stupid, I know. Advice?
Just stop that bullshit. If you choose a girl by looks you are gonna fail that relationship. If she is a great girl otherwise and you are attracted to her sexually then go for it and forget about some shitty ex. Life goes on, live your life for you, not some ex who doesn't give a fuck about who you are dating.
>>17206704
That's the thing, this current girl has an amazing personality, but I just don't find her physically/sexually attractive. And pretty as it is, I even want to avoid my ex thinking for 1 second "hah, look at the chick she's dating now" before forgetting forever
>>17206708
Then you have to dump the girl. Don't settle. You should also stop caring about what other people think.
So... My ex gf is now dating someone. Weve been together since december 14th and broke up a few weeks ago.
How can she do that to me... Its only been a few weeks...
Im very depressed because of that... I had only manage my feelings after the breakup.. Now im destroyed.
I dont drink because of my health condition but right now i just want to die...
Why she did that to me...
If she really did that she's just an attention whore. How do you know for sure she is dating someone ?
Omg dude, it was like four fucking months. Let it go. It is not that serious. Holy hell. Are you 15?
>>17206668
I posted a troll comment on 9chat (which is a social app) saying i'm dating a jewish girl.
She stalked on me and assumed I was really dating a jewish girl when in reality, no jewish girl would be dating me because of obvious reasons ! It was a simple troll.
I did that to get her attention so she could text me because i knew she was stalking on me.
But instead of talking to me, she decided to go out with someone based on that 9chat troll i posted.
So right now, i only have my tears.
Is this really a thing?
>>17206141
I don't think so
Nah, my husband is an inch shorter than me.
>>17206141
>Is this really a thing?
for some women yes. Most, no
>dating new girl
>been about a month
>finally have sex
>she wants to blow me
>k
>I'm about 6 and a half inches, fairly thick
>she says "wow my last boyfriend was huge, so this'll be really easy"
>look of horror on her face
>got soft quicker than I ever have
So that was last night. She spent the night with me, but we really didn't have sex, because she kind of slaughtered the mood. She went home this morning, and has been trying to call me since, but I don't even know what to say. Who the fuck says something like that the first time they are going to fuck their new bf/gf?
Like what the hell. What do I do at this point? Kind of sucks hearing that her ex is apparently so much bigger than me.
>>17205715
She's a cunt, drop her.
Is she cool and nice otherwise? Be honest here. People make mistakes and slip up but that's pretty messed up. Thad like saying my last girlfriend has plump perky tits but yours are saggy. Not cool.
>>17205720
This. Six and a half inches isn't a bad length, and if she's willing to say shit like that the first time you're together, I would avoid further exposure. I mean, bringing up her ex's dick unsolicited is a pretty big red flag, but if you want to take the risk, we can't stop you.
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. This is something that cannot be explained. You either have learned to intuit this or you have not. If you have not, the only way to learn is experience--there are no shortcuts. So it comes back to: Just ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online. Don't complain that this isn't helpful; stupid questions deserve answers like this.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't fucking know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>Brandon, that one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
Guys: Suppose you're walking through a park or something and meet a girl who says she has two kids, one of them a boy. What are the odds that the other one is also a boy?
>>17205565
50%.
>not sure if tricking, stupid or trolling
Girls and guys
Why do people say girls and guys can't be actual friends?
I'm friends with a girl. Yes.. Before you all say it, I do like her. BUT, I understand and accept I'll never ever be in a relationship with her. We are close friends and I support her with what she does. She just told me she met some guy today that she really likes, and guess what? I'm being supportive. I want her to be happy, and this guy makes her feel happy. So I completely support her!
So why do people say this isn't possible?
How can I shave, so it stops itching after I'm done shaving? I've shaved around 8 times around my dick, and it always itches for like a week. What's your secret, anons?
Trim, don't shave.
>>17204704
use clippers/trimmers instead of a razor.
>>17204720
>>17204725
Will it stop the itching or will it itch less?
Tell us your story, anon.
>>17203866
Dear OP,
Why are you always a faggot?
Love,
Anon.
I think I made the wrong choice to break up with my gf
I recently caught myself becoming more and more dumb with every year. Somehow concepts that were easy to understand now seem to be difficult and impossible, however, they have the same exact level of complexity, it didn't change. I struggle with remembering, lost an ability to write in my native tongue, now I'm making mistakes and can't see any logic in my own thoughts. Feels like fog in my head. Everything I've been learning is forgotten, I do remember the fact, but can't remember anything behind it.
//// What can I say to best show deep appreciation to my father figure / mentor?
I want to write a very nice letter for him near father's day. Looking for things that will mean a lot to him and make him feel good.
Thanks
Just say you care for him and thank him for making you who you are today. It doesn't have to be perfect to be heartfelt. It is coming from you, that should mean a lot to him.
>>17202305
Thanks, I appreciate the reply. I like the first sentence a lot.
I want to capture how I feel well and make sure he feels loved, in a way that makes sense for a father figure -- adult son relationship.
I wouldn't want to be told.
Best way to fend off a dog?
My mom almost got attacked by a dog a few days ago and now she's terrified of going outside. What do? Also, is it optimal to wrestle a dog onto its back, keep the dog in a loose headlock to maintain its head, using the other arm to restrain its legs/body?
I fucking love dogs but I just want to take care of the situation as safely as possible
>>17208305
How do you know she didn't start in with the dog first?
>>17208318
This.
We didn't get to hear he dogs side of the story.
Dog whistle. Air horn maybe.
![9TRgyBjyc[3].png](https://i.imgur.com/SquD1ED.png "9TRgyBjyc[3]")
