Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 578. page
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Need some serious help getting money together. Basically, I've been looking for a job for the past two months to no avail, college is getting closer and closer now and I feel like everywhere that would have hired, has hired. I'm still searching for a job but was wondering if any anons had any experience in any (legal) ways to earn money. In a serious rut here as I will need to put down a deposit for a room in a month and a half..
Where have you applied?
>>17220306
Mostly stores and restaurants/cafes.
I have very little in the way of experience as I've been fucked over on the 'no experience no job' merry-go-round for a long time..
>>17220312
Have you tried fast food? They're always desperate for staff
I am super ducked up /adv/. I am 26 and sexually and emotionally stunted.
I just can't seem to attract a woman. I am missing something. I don't have that masculine spark that women swoon over. What the fuck am I missing.
I see other dudes some how manage to get women to talk to them and I can't replicate it. What the fuck am I missing??!
Like what attracts women? As a result of all this shit, I have zero confidence. Crumbling ego. Help!
I just don't get how attraction works. I am sexually frustrates too. I am like ready to pounce on any girl wiling to give me the time of day... Fuck..
>>17220261
That "masculine spark" is just confidence. Read "How To Win Friends And Influence People", it will massively change your thinking. Besides that, just work on improving yourself. Stop watching porn (if you do), eat healthy and work out, work on interacting with people, get some hobbies, etc.
>>17220273
I can't not watch porn. It's the only thing keeping be sane. It's what I look forward to. I guess I could stop if something else could fill the spot.
I also don't understand how it's possible for me to be this age and not have had a romantic experience.. I was even avoiding it. It just never happened.
I have a very strong ADHD.
Is it possible for me to study?
I wish I could join college, but I can't spend 5 minutes reading a biology book without day dreaming for half a hour.
Profissional help is out of question, I don't have any money or anyone that could lend a hand.
>>17220248
It's possible to go to college and be successful with extreme executive dysfunction: i'm doing it right now (long story, involving narcolepsy, depression, adhd, anxiety, and lots of medication).
But if you don't have any money then you can't afford it. Even in a country with free tuition.
>>17220410
How exactly did you cope with your problems?
I live in a country with free and good colleges, so paying for the college itself is not an issue.
>>17220703
>How exactly did you cope with your problems?
Being smart, tons of pills, writing everything down, and generally working like a maniac (all day and all night). No free time, ever, and no breaks, no vidya, no nothing. Just work.
Most people also rely massively on others (though i don't, i don't have anyone to ask for help and simply rely on myself: been doing this since i was a little kid so im used to it).
>paying for the college itself is not an issue.
If you can't pay for basic necessities like medical care, where are you going to live? What are you going to eat? How are you going to buy textbooks? etc?
I'm honestly not sure if this is the place, but I need to get some other perspectives. This is gonna be messy but whatever, I'm a mess so it fits with the theme.
I turned thirty two months ago, and the past two months have been beyond depressing.
I have no degree, no friends, and a completely unreliable family of normies.
I'm a big guy, barrel chested strong-man type and I'm about 50 pounds overweight. I've been told many times if I lost all the fat I'd be pretty damn hot. I'm pretty damn smart with an IQ of 137 last I checked. I'm super fucking charming, very funny, and people seem to like me automatically.
Even now, girls are attracted to me, and I mean fuckin' hot girls. They literally approach me, get all flirty, and then I scare them away or ignore them, or I just straight up run away. Fuck. I turn into a mess of gibberish so even when neither party runs away I just fuck it all up and get unbelievably nervous.
>>17220241
Problem is this
Since I was 14 allI have done is smoke pot,play videogames, and jerk off to porn. From 14-28 that was all I did. I wasn't employed, I had zero friends, and, ready for it? I lived in my mothers unfinished basement. I also had no father figure growing up.
Two years ago I got a decent job making 15 bucks an hour and finally got a place of my own. I lost over 100 pounds, made friends, was literally the alpha of the group. Yeah, this loser right here was the popular kid of the popular kids. I eventually started hating them all, not sure why, and pushed everyone away. I don't even make eye contact with these people at work anymore I just walk on by.
I hate them. Or I just hate myself so fucking much I only think I hate them. Which is probably more accurate.
So I've spent the past year spiraling into severe depression. The past two months have been almost unbearable. I want to cry all the time, I sleep all the time, and I genuinely want to get off this ride a la blowing my brains out. I'm not sure if the super depression is since I just hit 30 and I'm a fucking loser or becasue I also recently stopped wankingto porn, smoking pot, and playing vidya. I can't deal with this too much longer. I'm back in my mom's and I can see the dissapointement in her eyes.
I don't know what to do. I mean, I want to end it, but it would destroy my family. I won't kill myself for that reason, really I won't, but holy fucking shit I want to die.
Halp.
/crazyrant
Oh, also a virgin.
So, yeah.
How do you have iq of 137 in an age of 30 and still ask strangers on the internet about your life?
>seriously, dude, do you put your brain in use at work, a smart guy with no degree
>you have 10 out of 10 for self-esteem tho
Idk, try not to get so worked up about social interactions, imagine something calm.
>From the US
>Meets guy in UK after exchange
>I think relocation to UK is possible in my future
>He cannot afford flying to the states and has never been outside of Europe
>>17220232
LDR = high risk, lots of effort, low reward.
How many years until you can move together?
Hint: even 1 year is VERY long time to consider.
>>17220269
I can relocate for grad school, but I am currently a sophomore at college
Can it be like this? Tell him to stay platonic, and if none of us found someone else by then, move to the UK?
>>17220278
Moving countries is a big decision to make
>24 year old permavirgin, never been in a relationship, forever alone, all that shit
>meet girl from reddit (not IRL, online)
>she's sort of big but has very pretty face and just my type
>talk throughout the day on kik (smartphone messaging app) and have done this for a few months, a lot of dirty stuff to start
>have talked to her three times on skype overnight, twice the calls were 4 hours long (including last night), a second time for 1.5 hours, some dirty stuff but mostly just bullshitting around like we're in bed together
>she actually likes how weird i am, how i'm a little mean and tease her a lot but then say the occasional nice thing, even my weird looking face
>we just talk shit to each other all the time and it's great
>she says how much she likes me all the time
>think i'm falling in love with her, likely just because I've never had experience with girls like this before
Can you guys offer advice? Is this a bad hole I've gotten myself into here? I know if I keep talking to her as much as I do, I'm going to fall in love with her, and I can't do that to someone online.
>can't do that to someone online
Why the hell not?? It seems like both of you love each other a whole lot!
>>17220221
>>17220234
Love is a strong word for this situation...
>>17220221
This is not a good idea unless you two are able to meet in real world (aka in person).
She will see you most likely as some nice daily distraction and this will end terribly for you in the long run.
Either ensure contact in person, or cut off the "love" part. Otherwise you will end up in LDR (long distance relationship) and it will inevitably fail horribly.
Hey /adv/, I seem to have some abandonment issues.
When I was a child my father left for awhile to work in another city. My mother was neglectful, and when I was around 9 my parents divorced.
After some time I was taken away from my father and sent to live with an uncle on my mother's side. My uncle was as neglectful as my mother, he didn't seem to even want me living with him.
I started to isolate myself from society.
After some more time I was sent away to a group home where I was heavily supervised, and went through some sort of psychological conditioning.
They had a system to "correct" certain behaviors. After a few years they let me go live with my father.
I dropped out of high school, and I've been neet for a few years.
I feel like I lost something, I feel lonely and numb all the time.
bump
>>17220214
I live in the same city as my immediate family, Parents have been happily married for 40+ years and my brothers went to the same schools as me. I feel like I don't really know my family either. I have nothing in common with any of my brothers, we never really played together growing up, Talking to all but one of them is always awkward. I've had issues with my identity most of my life plus annoying personality traits that I can trace back to a singular event in the second grade My parents didn't even know what religion I was until last month. They assume they know me, but it's not from having watched my actions or having spoken to me all my life. I see them all once a fortnight or so, so it's not like we never see one another.
Point I'm trying to make is that having family around you while growing up isn't a guarantee that your life wouldn't be just as fucked up as it is now. Maybe you'd be even more fucked up if they were around. You might even be dead.
So yeah.. make the most of what you have now and use it to make a better future for yourself.
>>17220279
Hey thanks for the reply,
Yes things could definitely be worse. I've learned to accept my situation, but I'm really concerned with the behaviors that I've developed as a result of my past. I had to heavily change my behavior. I compulsively put other's needs and desires ahead of my own. I feel like I'm neet because I can't break free from the programming I received at the group home.
"What is Your Dream?" People usually ask me this, and my answer is "To learn as much as I can".
Some laugh at this, and ony a few ones respect it. Am I a black sheep or something?
Anon, I can relate to having similar motive, maybe people expect a dream to be something achievable and concrete.
A huge task that you can check off.
That's a lot more noble of a goal than what most people have. Ask yourself though
>why is that my goal
>what will I do with this goal/use it for
>>17220165
I wish I really knew my dream. I'm insecure even of my college carrer choice. When did you get to know this was your dream?
>Punch a snake to death at work
>I think I'm going to get in trouble for it
Fucking come on
I hate trying to be a normie
>>17220118
Shut up aspie
>>17220118
Well why the fuck are you working at the zoo then? Whats next? Shooting gorillas?
>>17220135
>This actually sounds more fun than my job right now
Guys how do I get a job shooting gorillas
>>17220124
no u
Also what's the fastest and most efficient way to do so? I'm thinking of pursuing Hindi as well. Any advice on how I could go about accomplishing this on my off time will be greatly appreciated. (I have about eight hours a day to dedicate to my studies).
Thanks in advance!
Question is, how do you have 8 hours a day to dedicate to learning chong. Do you not do anything?
>>17220399
He might have just broke up for summer or something. I'm breaking up soon and have 11 weeks of and would love to at east try to learn a language
I started a few weeks ago with HSK 1 over memrise and a phrasebook.
It's going well
How do I become contempt with being alone?
First step is learning the difference between contempt and content
>>17220057
Here you go bruh, dont worry you are never alone.
>>17220068
Yeah, I realized what I did after posting and felt retarded
Is somebody a real friend if they never contact you to go out and you always contact them.
I have a few good friends who are pretty nice to me in real life and seem to like hanging out with me, but they never initiate going out, it's always me. Some weekends when I don't contact them they don't contact me either.
When I look at the people who contact me first, there's only like one or two people who actually do. Is this a problem?
these are the same people who will complain eventually when you stop contacting them.
>>17220039
Some people are afraid to talk first because they don't want to appear too needy or clingy. I've had this problem myself. It's not always the case, but it's a possibility. If they're really a good friend, ask them about it.
Ideally, there would be incentive to hang out on both ends, but in reality, this isn't always the case.
For whatever reason, people like to,"Tolerate" others to an extent and feign friendship for the sake of convenience.
I'd say if anybody doesn't express interest in hanging out with you of their own volition, then they probably can't be counted among your friends, but rather your acquaintances.
I want to abandon everything.
I want to just fly over to another country(any country) and try to live my life there.
I have no real savings to speak of. I intend to get on a plane, and let the chips fall where they may.
Is this at all feasible? Can anyone give me some tips?
Sure, you can do it if you want to, but your chances of ending up with something good are probably slim (depending on your expectations), in my opinion.
What is it that you want to abandon?
>>17219953
I have no delusions about "making it" abroad. I'm fine with working a manual labour job and just making enough to feed myself.
I'm 25 and I have never done a single thing worth mentioning. My entire life has been spent behind a computer screen and I am dying inside.
>>17219940
Brandon?
Went on a date with a girl. We had a romantic picknick with 3 bottles of wine with the last girl, got drunk, kissed her, held her hands, etc.
Next day I ask her if it was good, she says it was very good, i ask her if she's into next time, she says she can't imagine life with me, so no. Okay, fine, shit happens, asked her what should I improve in me, she says she don't know, she really had a good time with me, just can't imagine future with me.
Almost the same for another date, 3 meetings, last time kiss, next day writes she can't imagine future with me.
What the fk am I doing wrong? (Kissing is out of the picture, every girl liked how I kiss)
There is no logical explanation.
Seek another until desired results.
the problem is that you only kissed them and didn't fuck them. she cant imagine life with a pussy that doesnt fuck
>>17219795
Were you too sappy, reveal too much?
I really like this one guy. I think i don't love him. I just wanna be friends with him because he is awesome and fuck him sensless. He's not intrested in me i think. How do get to him as a friend with benefits? Should i just try to calm my tits?
FWB leads to one of you catching the feels. Almost always. If you want him as a friend because he's awsome, keep your panties on and be his friend. If you see potential for a relationship, get to know him better and seduce him.
Bring it up with him.
That is the fastest way to find out if he is interested.
>>17219801
Thank you for advice. I'm slightly afraid of relationships because i'm afraid he won't want treesomes and i can't just be with only men. I need some pussy to lick too.
![skype[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/mT7tPm7.png "skype[1]")
![maxresdefault[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/WQr2dTD.jpg "maxresdefault[1]")
