Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 549. page
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How do you date someone who you love but is pregnant to someone else
Backstory pls. I might be able to offer adv. Had a baby on my own 5 years ago and am about to marry a guy that's not the dad in autumn
>>17229992
You choose to date her and you knew she was pregnant. So either man up abd accept it or leave.
>Attempting to Justify Cuckolding: The Thread
How can I be more grateful for the things I have, /adv/? Why is it that the things I have accomplished feel like something that's already past me, something that needs not be remembered or thought about, while the things I want are always on my mind and I constantly dwell on them?
It's not something that you can "just do" either. I've tried consciously thinking about the stuff I'm grateful for, and I can come up with a few things.. but, it's more like something I realize that makes my life better, or something that life would suck without....
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assuming you are healthy, are you grateful for that? you could get in an accident tomorrow and lose both your legs. you will learn to be grateful once you lose something you value.
also how can you logically conclude that you are living the good times now if you are not happy
>>17230011
Yes, I realize that, and being healthy is something I should be grateful for. But I'm still not any happier from this realization, it's not a feeling, I don't get that warmth in my chest from thinking this.
Maybe I will be grateful once I lose something, but I think I've already lost some things that I only realized were important to me after they were no more. However, this only makes me want to go back to the time I had those things, rather than appreciate what I got instead of them -...
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>>17230048
being grateful is just a gentle reminder that things could be worse and you shouldn't take what you have for granted because you could lose it at any point. try to visualize your life after losing something you really value. your life from just a moment ago will seem nostalgic and better to you. realize that your life could turn to shit at any moment and be grateful that it hasn't
>Met this local girl while travelling Asia
>Took her out just looking for a fun night and a hook up
>Everything went as planned
>She told me the first day she had a boyfriend
>I was like well if you're okay with this not my problem
>Met her a few more times, started doing stuff daytime too
>Turns out she's an amazing girl
>We...
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The best thing would be to become more casual about it, that will happen naturally after you take a bit of a break. You will get on with your life and probably be happy to have another friend. It'll be fine and you should be able to accept her living like she normally lives (along with her friends), they are happy a lot of the time. Removing her from all her friends would be for the worst.
On the other hand you could probably get a job, buy a house for yourself and give her family ~8k a year, go through a ton of complications etc. Really not recommended. There's...
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I think it's fair to assume that older guys taking care of younger women in Asia don't care if they got other lovers. Just don't expect to get ahead of him, he's got the money.
I fucking hate Thailand.
>>17229920
Sounds like you didn't even have sex with her.
Why do I care so much about my parents' opinion of me? I've been wanting to make some friends, for example. But I feel like my parents would think I'm weird for suddenly talking to people. I believe my parents eavesdrop on me and talk behind my back. Essentially I'm afraid of their judgements. Is this a kind of social anxiety developed in childhood? I feel like I have to meet their expectations of my usual self (being introverted, sad, etc.), otherwise it feels incredibly awkward. Whenever I try to be more talkative, my father stares at me like I'm drunk...
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>I feel like I have to meet their expectations of my usual self (being introverted, sad, etc.)
>I believe my parents eavesdrop on me and talk behind my back.
>Why do I care so much about my parents' opinion of me?
I had thought that too. Turned out, they do. They still say to me that everything will be alright, they smile, however, I happen to hear their judgemental utterances in my side, blaming me for being retarded, making false assumptions and wrong decisions when...
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Your parents are inhibiting your growth as a person. This is fairly normal, but also extremely unhealthy. For your growth as a human being, I strongly encourage you to find a way to move out of your parents' house. The good thing about new situations is that you get a chance to reinvent yourself. The new you that you find is no less valid than the old one. But here's the thing: people HATE when you change. Especially people who are invested in the old you. They will question you for it and slow you down. Don't let them. Distance yourself so you have some room...
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>>17229948
>you are subconsciously trying to avoid their disapproval
How can I stop doing that? It seems impossible from my current point of view.
How can i become more quick witted? You know come up with clever responses and comebacks?
Watch The Office, or Scrubs
>>17229921
Can watching tv shows really help with that?
>>17229931
No, people who quote TV shows are "tolerated".
I broke up with my gf but realised the next day how much i love her and asked her to forgive me and be together again.She refused and said she cant play games which is true since i acted like a fucking child over stupid shit. I broke up with her because i couldnt handle her not talking all the time with me and basically because i was an insecure faggot. I was 5 years single and forgot how it is to be in a relationship.
Now i hate myself but i love her. The only good thing is that she still kinda sweetalks with me calling me baby and all that. What do i do? Give her time?...
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>>17229902
Grow a pair of testicles and stop being a gigantic needy vagina.
You'll be lucky if she takes you back, desu. I wouldn't take back someone who insisted on me spending all my time with them. IMO it's the least attractive personality trait.
Yes give her space, but more importantly, focus on improving yourself so you don't rely on other people's company.
>>17229906
I didnt want to spend all the time with her but i did want to talk with her more than three times a day but she bacame a bit distant.
She had some issues concerning her sex drive.I said i wanted to help her but i was a selfish asshole and only though about myself.
There's something that happens a lot in relationships, where in a girl winds up with a guy when he has good prospects, a nice social group, and a promising future. The girl can look up to him and trust his leadership.
Then the guy loses some of those friends and his social standing goes down. His future becomes less bright as he compromises his ambitions and takes the easy ("logical") road. Then he becomes more and more needy, investing more and more of his attention on his girlfriend. He's no longer leading her. He no longer impresses her and paves a...
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I feel like there are girls that are intimidated by me, but the thing is I'm more shy to talk to most of them. I always have feelings either some are trying to avoid me, make fun, of me, or I just don't know how to respond to them. It's not every girl, just usually the ones around my age. I've had a long conversation with one girl, but it felt so hard to hold a conversation and bore/creep her away , I was relieved she had class to get to right after. How can I stop feeling this way around them and how can get more positive interactions with girls?
>>17229899
>How can I stop feeling this way around them and how can get more positive interactions with girls?
Practice, generally.
I know that's not a very exciting answer, but in your situation it's what you need.
You're shit with girls for the same reason you're shit with an instrument you just picked up for the first time.
More practice and you'll get better at both the technical (executing plans, physical speaking part of the conversation) and creative...
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>>17229923
>You're shit with girls for the same reason you're shit with an instrument you just picked up for the first time.
But I do have experiences with women, but Im still shit with it. The only reason a person haven't been good playing an instrument is either they have shit hands or haven't tried. I felt like Im the one with shit hands. Most of time, just talking to them about stuff doesn't feel good enough if Im trying to make a friend/girlfriend it goes unrequited .
>>17229899
become relatable
I am a girl from a well-off family. How to tell whether guy is into me just for the cash?
>>17229892
I actually like it that we've gotten rid of that long-ass shit OP, some editing was long overdue.
>>17229907
>How to tell whether guy is into me just for the cash?
Making the first move eliminates a lot of the gold diggers.
This also gives you the chance to observe the guy and figure out if he's a shallow, materialistic fuck before he's aware of your interest (or aware of you at all).
Girls: do you want a male best friend? Can guys and girls be best friends?
Lets say you're waiting at a train station, and a really pretty girl walks by. You're probably never going to see her again, but she makes your heart flutter. There's also a possibility that she's also interested in you. What do you do?
I know going up and saying hi is the first step, but what do you do to keep it from getting awkward?
Hey, Im anon! Ur really pretty /u seem like a nice person/ some generic lane and i would like to take u to have a coffee/dinner may i have ur DMN DIGITS
"Hi... I noticed (something about her that isn't a physical feature - like clothing, book she's reading etc.). You seem really cool. My name is (Anon) by the way - would you like to go for a coffee some time?"
Something along these lines. You could compliment her hair or eyes or tattoos or something, but imo that's too unoriginal unless you're actually saying something interesting beyond "I like your ____"
>>17230094
Basically, you need to come up with a convincing pretext for why you approached her that isn't 'You're hot and I'd like to fuck you.' Even better if the pretext is flattering, interesting or unconventional.
Of course, if you're a guy with supermodel looks you could just babble nonsense in her general direction and that would probably work fine
Hey there, have a need to ask ramdom people for advise.
So I am living with my future wife, we are engaged. Planing the future. Etc. Both 29y. Together for 8 years.
My girl has small breasts, A size. I am somehow into it. It looks good to me. But at the same time I feel that she has a complex because of that.
She never understood that she is pretty. Especially for me. (She is a 11/10 for me)
I have saved enought money for a surgery. In a few days she will be at her first consultation.
Now the questions is: how can this change everything? What should I expect after...
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>>17229802
Bump
>>17229808
Bump
>>17229810
Bump take 3>>17229802
What's the best thing you can do with a computer science degree?
>>17229797
Cry about how much money you spent on it when Amit from Goa takes your job. Seriously, get a mech eng or EE or something if you can do math. Computer science degrees aren't worth shit.
1. Make the next facebook
2. Work in the military creating autonomous weapon platforms that will erase cunts from the face of the earth
pick one
>>17229797
Getting above average salary for something you enjoy doing.
>my life
So I just went to the loo...anyone experienced this before?
I'm not in any pain and had all my tests done last month and I'm 100% healthy (apparently).
Did you eat something out of the ordinary?
>>17229761
I've been drinking Lots a lemon juice but that's about it.
Have you eaten anything with beets in it? It colors your urine red
I first thought honesty would be best, so I told my last girlfriend. But after that I think she always saw me differently. She pitied me, especially around sex. I've never really liked sex that much, so I guess it has probably effected me, but I can fake it so its not a huge issue.
Things might be happening with a new girl. I'm not sure... I want her to tell me everything'll be okay and all that pussy shit... But people don't always understand this shit...
(I'm male btw, if not clear)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBjAEpwbIac
>>17229724
No, you should not. You will taint the relationship if you unload that kind of burden on your woman. Women gossip, talk about their emotional issues and sympathize with other women, if you join in she will subconsciously see you as "one of the girls." In a healthy traditional relationship emotions flow one way; off of the women and onto the man. She unloads her emotional baggage onto you, and in exchange she lets you put your dick inside her. If you have any pent up emotions, you get to "unload"...
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>>17229740
This is clearly coming from someone without any successful relationships under their belt.
Just be honest. Always. The more secrets you keep the less likely you are to keep any woman.
Thats not to say you should burst into tears and tell her every dark thing that you have ever thought in your life, just parcel out the damaged parts of you when you feel it is appropriate.
Anyone who can't handle you when knowing that is not worth being with.
>>17229740
wow you have a sad attitude about women
yeah you should tell her. my bf told me he was raped before we started dating, and im glad he did. it helped me understand him better, be kinder, and more sensitive (not touching his butt unexpectedly)
she will probably kiss you on the forehead and give snuggli
The last time i came here i asked for help with my crush, it has been one year since then.
She is now my girlfriend, and maybe we are going to have a baby, we are 19 yo.
We talked about it and we would love to have it.
But her parents are just crazy and overprotective, i dont know how are they going to react and im scared as fuck.
I need help on how to tell them, pls im lost.
if you wait too long with telling them, they will be pissed so better do it in the first 2-3 month.
Also you are now the man in her life, her parents will only be interested in knowing: will you provide for her, will you marry her and will you be a good father for their grandkid.
Everything else is between your GF and them. Show them that you are capable of those things and you wont have a problem. if they become overbearing get a bit of distance its your baby after all
>>17229712
You're a kid. You shouldn't have kids.
Do you both have a stable job that pays well? A house? Savings? Is your relationship stable?
>>17229712
LMAO wew lad
A baby shouldn't be a symbol for your love to your SO as it probably is since you're just a dumb kid. Seriously, a kid at 19? Bruh.
I know starting a family with your girlfriend sounds great and all but having to raise a non-fucked up kid takes a lot of time, responsibility, and most importantly money. Don't waste the your probably limited resources and the best years of your life trying to raise a child.
I feel like this is going to be a stupid question and a stupid thread, so apologies in advance.
I work at an airport, and yesterday, as I was dropping off luggage to the bag carousel, a girl walked by; we briefly made eye contact and she gave me a kind of sly smile, then kind of looked away and back. It was a bit disarming, but I smiled back and she kept going to wherever she was headed and I got back to working. Today, as I was driving one of the carts, I saw her again coming the opposite direction, and I feel like she was making eye contact as we were passing each...
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sounds like a good encounter ask her about herself more and find out what she is doing there and what she is doing aside from work etc.
>>17229717
>sounds like a good encounter
Yeah, but I'm not sure that's how it actually happened. Maybe I'm remembering it wrong.
I have, against better judgement, decided to try talking to her again. I'm bad at talking to most human beings, so talking to a girl I may(?) be interested in is extra scary. Is it wrong to see if she wants to hang out/etc next time I see her, to invite her out for a drink or coffee or something?
>>17229708
>I'd be sure the girl seems interested, but it's me, and I happen to not be a desirable dude
Well it's pretty obvious someone desires you. Shed that mindset asap
