Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 305. page
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So I work in a pretty sketchy neighborhood and take the bus home alone late at night because i'm poor and my job sucks. Everyday crazy crackheads say and yell stuff at me but i'm a guy so i've never been worried however today one of them got super aggressive
this crackhead was yelling across the street at me but I ignored him, it was pretty usual for this to happen but then he approached me and started to get angrier so I got up and left but then he ran and swung his arm at me while threatening to get a knife and slit my throat, I than ran to a nearby store and held the door shut as he pounded on it while the cashier called the police.
By the time they got there he had left though and I could only give them a pretty shitty description of your average crackhead.
Basically i'm terrified of this guy murdering me and don't know what to do, I will always be taking the late bus home due to the nature of my job and I will always be at the bus stop for at least 5 minutes
I can't afford to lose this job and I can't afford a car. Obviously I will look for a better job but what do I do in the meantime?
>>17297732
is it within your budget to pay for a taxi to and from work? or an uber?
What is your body type and his body type?
Did you actually ever see a knife on him?
Do you know any basic self-defense moves to get someone to the ground?
>>17297739
I make minimum wage and work 2 hours away from home so no
>>17297749
I didn't see a knife and I don't know self defense but I have about 70 pounds on him and half a foot in height. still doesn't mean i'm not scared of him, he could have a weapon, crack headbuddies and you never know what the hell a crackhead will do, he could bite me and give me hiv
I had successfully redone nofap for a month. It felt amazing. However, one night I was really horny and alas I went back to porn/fapping. And I have a problem with edging, so I fapped until like 12 AM.
This continued for almost a week or so. I would start fapping to porn at night and stay up really late. As such, I wasn't getting enough sleep and porn was fucking my brain up. I started to become really depressed as a result.
It got worse, as all the girls that I talk to began to cut contact with me all at the same time. This, along with the fact that many of these girls are transferring unis, made me tear up. I will never see or talk to some of these girls again.
Now, I'm stuck with a porn addiction and no girls to distract me from my porn urges. To make this short, how can I end this porn addiction when I don't have anything to divert my urges to? I think that since porn was what caused all this, cutting porn out would most likely solve the entire problem.
>>17297716
>depressed because of porn
Summer really is here
replace your hobby
>>17297724
Nah depression caused by no bitches caused by another depression which in turn was caused by lack of sleep and this lack of sleep was caused by porn.
And porn actually does lead to depression bro:
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/porn-making-my-social-anxietyconfidencedepressionocd-worse
I live in a dorm and i have difficulties sleeping. It's incredibly freezing in my dorm room but as soon as i lay my head down on my pillow it heats up. It gets so hot thay it becomes unbearable and i need to move to a different side of my pillow but then the same shit happens. Should i get a new pillow or does anyone have an idea on what it could be
>>17297661
Why don't you get an ice pack and put it inside your pillow case?
>>17297668
It would probably melt and water would get all over the place so not gonna work
>>17297668
Good idea.. But doesn't ice melt?
Can anyone explain to me why I get so looked down upon for having a good job by people around me that are around my age?
I mean, I'm fucking 29 years old. Yes, I make good money. I worked hard to be here, and I still like the people around me. But every time I get asked what I do or talk about it a little more in depth, I get the "okay, bigshot" kind of attitude.
Hiding that I've worked hard for what I do is annoying. How do I clean that up with people who are bartenders or service people?
Stop giving so many details dumb ass.
>>17297658
not much you can do. make a choice about hwat is more important. i have a similar issue. but it goes in different directions so no matter how i present it im fucked.
sometimes i just lie and say i sell paper at dunder mifflin. only one person realized the reference.
>>17297667
Or rather, stop giving so many details without being asked. Tell them what your job is, and be done with it.
Title says it all. I've been wanting to get a gaming pc since last year, when i got gifted a desktop and couldnt play most games. Also debating on a permit so i can drive when i want to. any advice on this?
>>17297657
Driver's permit takes priority. You can get your shitty budget gaming PC after.
>>17297657
Where I live, a permit costs literally $2, so I'm very confused as to why you even have a problem, but: I agree with the above anon. Being able to drive is more important in the long run, and an even better PC can be bought later.
>>17297657
Where the fuck do you live that a permit costs the same as a PC
I carry a lot of bitterness and resentment in my life /adv/. I will admit, I am particularly inept when it comes to things like relationships. I just can't articulate feelings and shit in a timely fashion. Basically, I spend too much time with women and get friend zoned. Not really salty about the friend zoning, I am more upset that I can't manage my personality enough to make it so that doesn't happen.
I also resent how small and ant like women make me feel. Women have all these options in relationships, I struggle just to have even one.
One of my friends was telling me that in the dating realm, women have all the power. Not much you can do to change it either. If you try to match a average woman and a average male together, the woman has more power to influence the relationship.
Its funny because I think about one particular woman like at least every day. many times. I bet she doesn't think about me one time. It feels like this for most women I interact with.
How is it that women can make men feel so ant like? It troubles my mind to know that I feel such feelings and they do not.
What can I do on the path moving forward? Do women really hold all the power in dating and relationships?
>>17297651
I'm still in love sith my ex after 4 months. She had a new boyfriend the day after we broke up...and this is s girl I was with for two years.
I honestly have no fucking clue. Women do nothing but make me feel shitty. I've been drinking a lot more heavily than usual but I think I should stop that.
I'll be monitoring your thread to see if anyone has anything useful to say.
>>17297651
About 4 months ago, my friends did something that really pissed me off.
I'm clinically depressed and it really got in the way of my studies in college. I was failing a physics class and was planning to drop it.
Before I did, a kid from my class walked in on me talking to my friends, then proceeds to call me a lazy piece of shit in front of all of them.
My friends, being the fucking betas that they are, all rally behind the true alpha that just entered the conversation. They told me all about how irresponsible I was, even the really close friends I that knew I was depressed.
At one point I finally managed to stand up for myself with "Hey you guys are right, part of it is laziness, but most of it is personal", and someone whispers under their breath that there's nothing personal about it.
I got guilted into staying in the class. I barely passed it and ended up failing a class that was really important to my major, something I feel like wouldn't have happened if I wasn't in my physics class and those assholes hadn't put me into such a low state of depression.
To add insult to injury, one of my friends, one of the ones who knew I was depressed, proceeded to keep scolding me the next day until I told him off. He then proceeded to fail his calc class at the end of the quarter.
Another of these friends also failed that calc class and I got a higher grade in physics than the guy who started this whole situation, after he said the class was easy and that I was a pussy.
The worst part about all this is that none of them apologized. Whenever I brought it up weeks later, they all just stared at the ground for about 15 minutes until they changed the subject to something else.
TL;DR bump
>>17297651
>I carry a lot of bitterness and resentment in my life
Well you will fit in perfectly. Don't forget to hate everything and one!
Love your gram?
>old sloot whore bitch
Your black mail carrier is nice
>lynch him
Your cousin is gay
>wish her a solid raping
Welcome to an uncomfortable, unhappy world of hate.
Please let go of your hang ups and bitterness and just be fucking happy.
im 18 and im not sure if i have a receding hairline. im scared honestly. plz help.
>>17297633
Yeh. Sorry bro
>24years old
>still a plethora of mental problems
what do? everyone told me I will grow out of it
>>17297630
You go to a fucking psychiatrist, because some psychological issues don't just go away on their own.
Schizophrenia, OCD, bipolar, etc. Lots of things you don't just "grow out of".
What problems are you having, specifically?
>>17297673
I dont want to go to a psychiatrist or a psychologist. The whole idea od proffesional help for me is disgusting from an ethical point of view.
>>17297685
Then suck it up.
You know, I just can't figure this shit out. The whole social interaction thing. It's bugging me to no end, and no advice I got ended up particularly useful.
First of all, some background. I'm twenty six. Because of a variety of circumstances, including severe health issues in my youth, I never socialized much as a kid - or a teen, although at that point it was equally a matter of the issues, already present lack of social skills, and being a stupid teen and deluding myself into thinking I don't actually want to socialize, because dumb reasoning.
Current situation: No fucking social life. At all. No friends. No social hobbies. No reason to even leave my apartment beyond studies and shopping. The problem is, for the past two years it bothers me. I've been trying to fix this. But I just can't seem to.
I can't handle people. I can't seem to relate in the least, having the empathy of a fucking rock. I can't seem to, I don't know, care as much as I should. Every non-essential interaction I have with them involves either myself getting nervous (particularly in groups), them being off-put by my behaviour (thankfully incredibly rare due to self-moderation - and we're not talking being unbearably autistic as much as the 'no empathy' part, as it's hard for me to fake concern) or some other ineptitude-related reason. It's happened over and over, for the past two years' worth of attempts. It gets better, sure, but at this pace it will take me until 30+ to actually function. Not particularly appealing.
All the advice I got amounts to keeping on with this sink or swim method. But I'm tired of sinking. So very, very tired. Making up for such a lack in social ability at an age when people expect you to not be inept about just seems impossible.
>>17297626
Do you have a job?
>>17297640
No. I don't particularly need one, as the benefits I get on account of the lingering health issues are just enough to live on - not particularly well, mind, but I don't have much in the way of wants.
The more important reason, however, is that I live in the same city I study in - and there are three different higher education institutions there, which makes for a lot of people who need part-time jobs. They get swiped extremely fast, and those which remain... well, they're almost always terrible, or require prior experience in a given area.
My only option would be tutoring beyond the city itself - also swiped up fast, but always in demand. The problem, of course, is that one-on-one teaching means some degree of social interaction. Also, I hate kids, fuck that.
Read the book "How to win friends and influence people". I found it to be very helpful in all aspects of social interaction.
I don't think it will change your life in one night but it will give you a better understanding as to what goes into comunicating.
>19 y.o. college junior, M
Girl I've been talking to for a few months yet invited me over to her apartment this coming weekend, her roommate isn't in town and she wants me to spend the night... Kinda nervous, she said she'll have alcohol (she's 21) too.
Already went and bought condoms just in case... anything else I should prepare myself with? Virgin here and this is my first relationship since middle school, not sure what to do. Any tips to help a brother out?
Bump... should I get flowers? Chocolates, anything? She's not one of the really girly, into-gifts type, but I don't want to show up empty handed...
>>17298675
Bring more alcohol. Or sweets. Not chocolate or flowers though. Avoid these boring cliches.
>>17298675
no faggot, if anything bring more alcohol
I was sentenced to probation for misdemeanor shoplifting a while back. I did two months in the county and got probation and was sentenced to 10 months suspended(probation) to attend alcohol dependence classes. I didn't have a car at the time so I couldn't get to the classes which were 3 fuckng days a week, so I violated my probation. My probation revocation hearing is tomorrow. What should I expect my dudes? I have no children or job currently so if I have to do time I'm not that worried about it. But I'd obviously prefer to avoid it as county jail is mind numbingly tedious and boring. Anyone been in a situation similar to this? I have no lawy
Typically they just add community service.
It's expensive to put people in jail.
>>17297618
It's not prison?
Explain to the judge your situation and the effort you made to try to get to the classes and how they have mercy on you.
you are sociopath, i hope i never meet people like you in real life
I need advice/help with getting something removed from Facebook.
A page which I was a customer of wasn't happy with our transaction or lack there of because of their delayed shipping and decided to post my pic and slander me on their page to 34k people. Okay, fine that's their prerogative normally I would just brush it off. But the issue is they included pics from my photos that are normally hidde , I guess they must have really done some digging, that had me with my kid! My kid is only 9 and now is on this person's page which is aggressively attacking me.
Some important info. The page is not an English page and the post is not in English. I have reported the post with 3 accounts but the problem is that Facebook doesn't let you give a reason when you report, you can only select their own arbitrary report functions. I used the one that said this shows myself or my family in a bad light or something like that.
Some hours later I got a seemingly automated reply from fb saying they didn't think the post violated the community guidelines. At this point you can rate the service they gave you and send a reply so this was the first time I could explain tthe situation and what actually happened and why I want the post or just the pic of my kid removed. Have yet to receive a response from fb that was over 24 hours ago.
What can I do? After a lot of googling I found that maybe emailling abuse@facebook would work but I haven't got a reply from them.
I'm really lost at what to do. My country has shit laws for this kind of stuff so we can't use the law to make them take the pictures down. I feel like fb would take my side if they actually knew the situation but I can't find a way to speak to someone from there.
Please help.
I'm gonna kill sambadeeeee
>>17297617
That's weird that a business would do that. What kind of industry is it? Did you do anything to them other than cancelling the order?
I would continue to reach out to FB. In the mean time, message the business owner and (politely) request he remove the photo of your son. If they don't, are you in driving distance of the business?
I am not sure if I really understand this situation, to be honest..
>>17297617
What did or didn't you purchase, OP?
Seems like you're freaking out over nothing. Just run of the mill internet stupidity that will be forgotten in a month
There's a girl from work who likes me, but she has awful taste in television.
Should I go for it?
She's also a little chubby, but whatever - I can teach her good eating habits.
I dunno my ex gf who I miss very much had bad taste in television but she was worth it.
>>17297606
If having bad taste in television is your biggest concern with someone as a romantic partner then you're nuts not to go for them. My gf watches reality tv and shitty shows like survivor on a regular basis. I don't lambaste her with insults. I jokingly criticize her and she laughs it off - then I watch it with her and we joke about it.
Stop taking everything so seriously. There's more to life than tv you fucking chubby chaser.
The tv thing is whatever. Tbh I'd see it as a positive as I have some hobbies and my last girlfriend wanted my attention and complained if I spent too much time working on them.
Don't get into a relationship planning to change someone though. That's womanly shit. You have to be ok with her being that chubby. If you're not, don't date her.
Women are terrible at losing weight anyway. They follow meme diets, yoyo about, complain it's not working, ask you for guidance, you give it to them, they ignore it, you ask them if they want to go for a bikeride and they brush it off.
Basically, you have to be ok with her as she is now, sexually. If you think she'd be better with exercise/surgery/a change in style you're a manipulative and/or settling cunt.
Find someone else if she's too fat for you.
>on-and-off live with mom in condo for a year or 2
>she leaves, lets me live in it alone
>starting to notice a fuckton of bugs/spiders around both inside and out
When she and I lived here, I only remember 1 big instance of bugs and that was when she left our honey open and ants infested our food. After living alone, I've had 2 huge outbreaks of ants, though never near the kitchen; I asked her, and she said it's common that ants sneak in after rain en masse. I often see spiders and earwigs crawling around inside, and the occasional lone ant.
There's a small swamp in our backyard and I live in Michigan so naturally bugs are around. Should I be worried about my living habits if I'm regularly seeing like 4-5 spiders making webs inside, and a fuckton outside? Or is this normal? How should I handle lowering the bug count?
>>17297590
Use an ant killer (I use ortho) around the exterior where you see ants coming into your home.
The easiest way to keep your home bug free is to keep it very clean and uncluttered and don't keep food out. Buy a vacuum cleaner.
>>17297596
I haven't seen ants lately, moreso spiders and earwigs. Sometimes I do have a habit of leaving small leftovers on my desk for a day or 2, is that enough to draw bugs do you think? Or perhaps leaving fruits out as a centerpiece?
>>17297613
Leaving food out is a bad idea. If you're getting earwigs in your home, make sure the perimeter is dry (why do you have a "small swamp" in your backyard?). You can also spray around the outside to discourage bugs from coming in through cracks around the foundation. I usually spray every five or six months and it keeps most ground bugs out.
I threw a birthday for my friend, got him an expensive turtle beach headset, and a $60 gift card to best buy. Yesterday for my birthday he gave me a hand shake saying happy birthday mate. Should I be fucking furious thats all I got.
If you bought that shit just so he'd buy you shit on your birthday, then you're not a very good friend. The point of giving gifts is not expecting anything in return.
>>17297583
No, unless you think the only reason to buy people gifts is to pressure them into upping the ante for your birthday. If you're not giving gifts as a way to show people how important they are to you, then you shouldn't bother. It's a gift, not a needlessly complicated IOU.
Assuming im a bad friend for doing all that expecting shit in return. Does that change that fact it was dick move. Maybe I shouldnt have expected anything and it was my fault.
