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She says its because she wants to see if I can "actually keep a promise to her"
While I suppose the reasoning is well deserved is this one of those situations where I should put my foot down and say "this is bullshit. I'm not doing it."
Guess you don't love her enough.
filthy stoner
It sounds like the real issue isn't weed-smoking, the problem is that you lie and sneak around, tell her what she wants to hear then do shit behind her back. That's pussy behavior and nobody likes that. Don't make promises you don't intend to keep, just because it'll get you out of an argument faster.
If you want to smoke weed, tell her that you enjoy it and you don't plan to stop. If she doesn't want to be with a drug user, she might leave you. Stop trying to have it both ways
Need opinions, semi-complex backstory so I'll try and shorten it best I can
>Meet girl at work couple weeks back
>Walk her home after work, we hit it off, exchange deets, get a hug
>Go for coffee couple days later, goes really well, get another hug
>Ask her out on a proper date, solid full night, have lots of fun, lots of flirting, she asks me if I've told anyone about her yet, we're both really connecting
>She ends up asking me if I wanna go and stay at hers
>I oblige, we go back and watch a movie, then we start kissing, end up getting undressed and kissing in bed
>It was so late, we were both exhausted, and we kept laughing at bumping into each other, we decided to call it a night and try again another night so we didnt have sex
>Downside: She was going home the next day for the xmas holidays, and I was staying in our uni city for the next couple weeks for work
>She said on the night that we can talk over phone, and seemed really keen on the idea of me coming to visit her when I do come home (We live relatively near each other in our home cities)
>Next day, text her that I had a great time the night before, she texts me back that so did she, but she's sorry but she's not ready for anything emotional, its just too soon
>I say thats cool, I understand, hope we can still hang and stuff
>She says of course
>Over next week text her every couple days, as the week goes on text each other back more and more
Now we are here. Im going home on xmas eve. I was thinking about asking to come visit her in between xmas and new year, I just really wanna see her in person again.
She wont be coming back to our uni city until early january and that'll be for exams. I just really, really wanna chance to see her again.
Do I do it? Or do I just keep texting her and playing it chill?
I still dont know how she's feeling. If she still wants to date me again but just keep it slow, or what.
Sounds like she just wants to fuck
>>16587822
she's not ready for anything emotional because it's too soon...... sooo you can either convince her to change her mind or watch her change her mind on her own (or of course she doesnt, but if she does) this ends in a couple months with her breaking her heart because if she wasn't emotionally ready now and then decides she is in a couple weeks or months, she isn't and hasn't had the years it takes to sort though that issue
>>16587873
her breaking *your* heart
>work as a waiter on a wedding
>see this hot ass girl
>have long eye contact and she smiles at me
>don't want to ask her for her number because she is with her parents
>next day her fat bff pokes me on facebook
>the hot chick is with her on most of the pics but I cant find her on facebook.
>only way that get in touch with her is the ugly bff
>what do?
pls help
halp
>>16587817
explain you thought you felt a personal connection with her friend and ask for her contact info or facebook
>>16587878
I am afraid she will be pissed because her friend got my attention and not herself. I dont think she would help me to get in contact with her friend
So I got in an argument with my parents (they were being dicks so I called them out but anyway) and my dad somehow managed to prevent my phone from accessing the house wifi, even though he never touch my phone (as far as I know) how do I reverse this?
He might've reset the router and/or changed the password. Are you sure it was deliberate?
>>16587792
you wait two years until you're 19 and move out.
being that they pay your phone bill im sure its possible. Now go to sleep
Is it "normal" for the average 18 yr old guy to get horny just cause his 5 year old touched his hand while he was helping her play , or he gets hard when she sits on his lap? I've never asked my friends this, it would be too akward. I understand its weird , but there are some things that everyone secretly knows everyone does, but is still considered weird , like talking to yourself.
What the fuck is wrong with you man
>>16587786
i don't talk to myself but who cares if you say something out loud instead of in your head. of course, i talk to myself in my head. these are thoughts.
no, it's not normal for the average 18 year old, or any guy to get horny cause his 5 year old touched his hand or sat on his lap or did anything at all. you have to remind yourself of just how fucked up this is until that realization sinks in and it goes away
>>16587800
I don't know.....
I've dated this guy for a couple weeks and recently found out he's slept with a lot of people. More than 100, he couldn't tell an exact number.
He even slept with someone this weekend (we're not officially dating or anything, just interested in eachother). We haven't slept yet (I'm not holding back or anything, just hasn't come to it).
I want to try and see past his sexual history but it still makes me feel kind of disgusted. I don't judge him personally or anything it's just that I don't want to be with someone who has slept with that many people, and are actively still doing it.
My own number is around 10 people. I'm 20 years old and he's 27 to put it in perspective.
What would you guys do? Is it worth seeing past, assuming he's clean from STIs, or is he forever tainted by the sexual activities in his past (and present)?
Unless your time is super valuable or you're a gullible idiot, I would wait and see how it plays out. If he starts with the wandering eyes or the lack of appreciation for you I'm sure you'd notice.
That's fucking gross.
I mean, 10 people at 20 is also pretty gross, but god damn.
I mean, it's obvious that he's never going to be 100% monogamous with anyone. So you either have to accept that and be comfortable with it, or accept that nothing serious will ever really work out between you two. It's not a "right" or "wrong" thing, it just sounds like you and him have completely different attitudes about sex and love.
Do you have courage and bravery /adv/?
If so, where do you draw it from?
In spades.
It's called a soul.
>>16587732
I guess. I don't really know what courage is. Btw courage and bravery are absolutely synonymous.
I don't know how "courage" is relevant to a person's everyday life. For example, you could say asking a girl out is courage, but really it's just common sense.
Or asking your boss for a raise is courage. In reality, it's just a risk assessment, etc.
it depends on the context, really
but I work in a shelter that deals with a lot of PDDs (potentially dangerous dogs) who have a history of aggression. some mild, some that have ripped children's faces off or mauled people or killed livestock
I'm usually the one that handles them because Im just not that bothered by it. I've been severely bitten twice, a husky ripped my arm open and I almost needed surgery, the second was a German shepherd that put me on crutches for almost a week. But even still, I don't get too nervous handling them.
plus I'm not afraid to confront people bigger than me, but that probably comes from doing BJJ and kickboxing since I was a kid
i need some gay relationship /adv/ice m8s I could post on /lgbt/ but i dont feel like checking my privilege
Long story short I met this guy on grindr (pls no bully) while doing an exchange program in mexico for my university. I was using tinder too, but this guy seemed like he was the most into me and I was also interested in him. We've been dating for 9 months and I came back to work in Mexico as a teacher. I'm younger than he is and above his rating in the looks department, but he's really chill to be around and I'm like a negative 5 on the personality scale.
He told me that he and his ex broke up and they were on this weird on again off again roller coaster right until he met me. But then when his ex's birthday rolled around 6 months ago, my bf had already started dating me and decided not to go to the birthday party. Naturally the jealous ex (my bf was the one who broke up with him mostly) blocked him on facebook and stopped talking to him.
According to my boyfriend, his ex still "means a lot to him" and he thinks it doesn't make sense to just burn a bridge, nonetheless he chose to let his ex just be a cranky bitch for 6 months and didn't ask why his ex blocked him. Fast forward to now, he finally messaged his ex and they reconciled. He told me they were going to be reconciling, but almost in an "FYI" kind of way like oh by the way I'm seeing my ex hope youre okay with that, he'll be over at my place in 30 minutes XD. I told him that he can do what he wants but I wasn't very happy about it at all. Now every time he mentions his ex it just makes me rage.
Also I caught him using grindr once, and I told him that it really pissed me off but I wouldn't force him to stop using it. He doesn't really have a lot of friends and he used to save a shit load of pictures off grindr so I kind of think that's a form of porn for him not so much an "I'm going to leave you and cheat on you with these people" kind of thing.
Tl;dr boyfriend talks to ex, am i getting cuckd
>>16587692
Sort of cucked. You really need to learn to tl;dr:
>OP an fag
>OP's bf is seeing his ex bf while cucking OP
>is OP a cuck
>gay threads are confusing because everyone is a "bf", harder to keep track of
Go with your gut. He's obviously not in this thing 100%. Enjoy it while it lasts, but you shouldn't be thinking too seriously or planning a future with this guy, if he's already behaving like this.
>>16587765
lel, sorry. Yeah I feel sort of cucked
>>16587774
True I guess I'm not planning our entire future together or anything, I just want to know that if it starts to get really serious that he would be interested in having it be really serious. Basically if I didn't plan on going back to the US to do a master's I would already want it to be more serious and I would ask him to stop doing all of those things. I just feel like it's unfair to ask for him to stop talking to his ex if I possibly might not be living here for another two years...if that makes any sense at all
So lately I have been having sexual feelings towards a very long time female friend of mine. How do I approach this? I do care for her a lot...I think our friendship has grown to something more than just best friends though...Aside from parents and family she is the only person I can think that I love and truly care about.
>>16587687
More info m8
>>16587696
like what
>>16587698
Does she fancy you? What do you want to achieve? How close you two are? She single?
What the hell do I say in a first message on a dating site? Fuck I'm absolutely lost as to how to start conversations with girls over the Internet
This isn't me. I'm not actually a cop....I mean I AM a cop. I AM A MOTHA FUCKIN COP.
>>16587572
How do you start conversations with women offline?
> Inb4 you don't.
dont kiss her ass or act over excited. Just try to go for a nothing to lose attitude and try to show genuine interest but don't over do it.
Hi...I was diagnosed with bipolar but some things I have add up with schyzophrenia...I never thought this before my friend pointed it out about some symptoms I described. These symptoms are not ones that I have ever discussed with my doctor. I've only told my doctor about my mood swing patterns and how they affect my behaviour also how feeling is so intense I can barely handle it sometimes. So...I've always thought people can read my mind; I would walk down streets having full conversations with people from mind to mind telling them to get out that I know they are spies and want to hurt me. I would run home everyday because I thought people were out to get me, they'll take my phone and then not even want to rape me because I'm ugly so to be safe they'll just kill me. People are following me. Now my main delusion...well everyone says its a delusion but I can't not believe it is spirits. I'm scared all the time, I can't live my life I'm scared the spirits want to hurt me. I see things, it's like everything I look at moves up down right left and then into place. Nothing ever looks real...I see dragons then eventually after looking at it for 3 minutes it will be a bush again. People everywhere but they always end up being objects. Always feel like I'm being followed, I'm terrified of being alone in my house I know someone is there. I used to run from room to room checking again and again and again terrified. I do have this voice in my head there's one that is me talking but the other is actually always talking to me telling me what to do...I guess it's helpful in the kitchen because it seems to know just how to spice stuff but sometimes it insults me too. Sometimes it's like there's someone stuck inside of me...the other week they spoke to me and said ' I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. You're an awful person. I hate you. I hate being stuck inside of you. I hate being stuck with you. ' it's like they're trying to get out. I also have extreme highs and extreme lows
>>16587477
Sometimes I'm in a room and the room suddenly gets completely brighter but actually it's the same lighting then it feels like an angel entered my body and I feel complete euphoria. This is all without drugs. What the fuck is wrong with me? I can't tell if it's real it feels real to me but everyone tells me not...the other day I saw a huge shadow man he towered over me then sat beneath me trying to read my mind I had to sit there for 10 minutes while he stayed repeating you can't read me you can't read me you can't read me until the demon was gone. I'm scared. Please help. I still have a boyfriend and a job but being inside my head is so exhausting I don't want to leave my house to go to work. Being inside my head is already a big job. I feel like I'm normal but then I look back and realise maybe not but I don't think I need help but all the time I'm crying desperate and hurting so maybe I do. Can you give your advice on if you think there might be more to it than the bipolar?
Bump. Can just one person maybe give me an idea of what's wrong
You need to tell your doctor and seek help.
So I've been going out with this girl for about half a year now, things are going really well and it feels like we're an amazingly good match.
However, she recently mentioned she had a fuck buddy, and if it were ok with me, she'd like to keep that relationship alongside ours.
I don't really know how I feel. I want to say sex aint nothing but sex, yet there's still a feeling of anxiety when I think about her also fucking someone else. Like our relationship suddenly isn't as important, or that I'm slightly less important to her. I can't quite place the feeling, but it is a little uncomfortable. Moreover, she had a fuck buddy which is available to her, but I don't, which feels sort of unfair.
Anyone know how to feel about these feels? Does anyone have experience with sexually open relationships? I'd appreciate any thoughts you have on the matter.
Man just dump her now, because if she's that kind of person the relationship isn't going to last.
>>16587440
what the fuck, this has to be bait, don't be a damn cuck OP
>>16587458
>>16587454
Thought I'd be getting replies like this. You guys seem very insecure about sex and that is fine, but come on, try to give better advice than just gut reactions.
Lots of people have open relationships. People I know have had them. Some have worked, some not. Just like regular relationships. Not gonna dump her because I feel a little uneasy about this when we have so much of worth in our relationship.
>21female
>I'm not overweight but I'm certainly not skinny,
>My friends would probably rate me a 6.5 at best
>Ive tried all the generic stuff like going out to bars, online dating
>the most I seem to get is maybe a conversation and then after 10 minutes they seem to get bored or I run out of things to say or worse talk to my friends
>I really don't know what to do should I just give up now: unnatractive and no redeeming personality to help with it :(
>>16587264
>lose weight
>stop being boring
Improve your body, and leave your comfort zone to develop new interests. There is no real magic trick to all of this.
It's not like you need to be an 8+ with a genius intellect to find a partner, but just improvement in any direction will help you out.
>>16587264
Find some activities to do with people. As many different activities as you are comfortable with, considering your temperament. Yoga, guided meditation, dancing, languages, sports and so on.
Learn what you like and dislike and learn how to express it. If you are too inhibited to handle change on your own, consider therapy that helps with that. I know Gestalt does that, as well as group therapy.
Anyone else losing their trust in women when it comes to dating?
I think I might be at the end of my rope on this one. Something always happens, something always backfires, in ways that are exclusive to the people you date; and I do mean that they happen in ways the can *only* occur with those people.
There's also the constant problem with communications. They either never say what they mean, or put very little connotation behind their words, that it leaves you constantly guessing, wondering, whether you should take anything they're saying at face value, or worry that there's more to it they're not letting on (expecting you to somehow figure it out). There's also when they stop responding or grow more quiet, always claiming it's nothing for you to worry about, yet leaves you with having to one day find out that it was just the opposite; and the consequences, or shitflinging between you, just gets worse as a result. This leaves you, once more, invariably second guessing yourself and everything they do and say. Because now, when they're slow to respond or (for example) forget to reply a text message or something, you can't fucking tell if it's just them or something is up to cause more drama in your life.
Because of bullshit like this, you find yourself being extra careful around women, and cannot help but to mentally list out all the possible meanings and scenarios of potential happenings just for something as small as a girl say "hi" to you. I never have this problem with anyone BUT women. I still don't understand how an entire gender can have so many complications just for stuff as small as communication; and I don't understand the amount of back firings and consequences which also comes from those small things. This makes it very difficult to trust even just one woman.
My guess:
It's not about them. You are a control freak. You need to control every little thing they do, know about everything they're doing.
Control freaks always feel betrayed because they suffocate the people they're in relationships with and the other person invariably reacts by either leaving or starting to lie and cover up to escape the prison
The common denominator in all of your problems is you.
>>16587262
>dat projection
seriously it doesn't even sound like you're replying to the same post. when you have people regularly acting out over small things like trying to talk to one-another, it's going to make hard to take what everyone else is saying without trying to analyse them.
My cats have fleas and I can't afford to get them to the vet for a week or two. They seem to be especially irritated my one cat and he's constantly scratching and the bites are getting irritated and worse. Are there any home remedies that will at least help them to feel better/scratch less until I get them treated? I put a little proxide on the bites. I don't want to put any cream on them because they'll just lick it off and get sick and it'll fuck up their fur. Is there a safe ratio of benadryl I can give them? If so how can I get them to eat it? They only eat dry food so it would be difficult to mix in
Pic related.
Sell your possessions.
If you can't afford 50$ flea meds, rehome your cats.
Aww, poor cats. Taking them to the vet? wouldn't just buying some product like frontline be enough?
You could try killing some of the fleas one by one, I used to do that with one of my cats (but, she was white)
>>16587245
Contact shelter in your area. Maybe they can help and let you pay later
