Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1967. page
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How do you stop wanting to be another race?
It's begun to really interfere with my life in the form of depression and self harm. Sad thing is, to the exclusion of this idiotic problem, my life should be great, everything is going how I want it to.
>inb4 therapist
I couldn't look another person in the eyes and tell them I feel this way.
Do you wish you were another race because you feel that that particular race is who you are inside, or do you hate what your current race represents to you, or both?
>>16620491
Both, plus finding my race almost uniformly unattractive.
>>16620504
Out of curiosity, what is your race, and what race do you wish to be?
Should I risk going to a university and getting in debt for $30,000 of debt. Or go to a Community College and not get the real college experience. I don't get financial aid, but don't want to be left out of a true college experience what should I do. I would be interested in hearing any experiences.
>>16620430
>risk
What's there to risk? It's not like getting an education is like winning the lottery or anything
>I don't get financial aid
???
>>16620458
The risk is being in debt $30,000 that's money I'll have to pay back. That in and of its own is a risk.
>girl I don't know sits with me at a bar and starts talking to me
>make boring conversation hoping she goes away
>she does
I'm 19 and I don't care about women at all. They're annoying.
At what age should this become worrisome
>>16620293
You're gay, son
Not age, but the point it changes from disinterest and mild annoyance to irritation and judgement.
>>16620313
Very gay.
If you could move to any state in the country, which would it be and why?
>pic unrelated
>>16620289
Do you have more from this set?
>>16620292
theres a dick right
anyway
Estonia because its amazing
>>16620292
It's grace from /soc/ unfortunately there's not much else I can post here lol.
I'll try to make this short.
>friday night
>my older brother completely flips out and accuses me and several other members of my family of molesting him in his sleep and trying to poison him
>he runs out of the house screaming for someone to call 911
>parents call the police and have him commited
>he gets diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia
The past few days have been really hard. We all keep crying and crying. He came home from the hospital today and the rest of the family had been kind to him but I haven't spoken a word to him.
Can someone please tell me what to do?
rape him. no one will believe him.
>>16620279
Usually I find dark humor really funny.
But considering recent events that actually hurt pretty bad man.Ow.
>>16620270
theres nothing to really do at this point but try and live life the best you can and make accomodations for your brother wherever possible. dont let him control your life. there will likely come a time where your parents expect you to give up large parts of your life to stay home and take care of your brother. something like missing out on love or a career or school or what have you.
you'll feel guilty but you have to do whats best for you, not for him.
Hello /adv/ I'm in a bit of a pickle
>2014ish meet girl and become close friends talk almost regularly for the past 2 years or so
>girl eventually tells me she has feelings for me and she would like to be in a relationship
>beta in me is afraid of being in a relationship and i say i'm not ready because i have depression and anxiety and i was fat as fuck.
>she had similar issues.
>end up talking a bit less after my 'rejection' of her
>i was actually trying to improve myself so i could be presentable and be in a relationship
>ffw 2015 february
>I've lost weight, read health and mental help books, signed up for college, job seeking.
>find out she's in a relationship with some guy
>we rarely talked because i didn't have internet or a phone line
>feel like i've really missed out
>feel like she's moved on but i haven't
>talk to her and she says she's happy with him and that he's amazing
>regress into anxiety/depression a bit.
>ffw 2015 june/july
>she tells me she's living with her boyfriend until she moves to another city
>she wants to hang out one last time before she leaves
>we never do
>she leaves
>ffw 2015 august
>she's in a new city
>i'm getting my life together
>she tells me she hated living in my city
>she says her mom kicked her out and she was forced to move in with her now ex
>she says she's really happy where she is now
>we start talking over the next few months
>get close again
>I end up telling her that i never stopped thinking about her
>she says she didn't know but that she feels the same, that we always had something
>we talk about how we feel/felt about each other
>have good positive conversations
>start falling in love
>I tell her i love her
>she tells me she loves me
>says she doesn't want a long distance relationship
>says she doesn't want anyone else
>says she's coming to visit family for the holidays
>says she wants to see me
>(cont)
>>16620246
>ffw 2015 December/now
>she finally gets back into town to see her family
>she's staying until after new year
>We meet up
>go out a few times around town
>end up making out/love a couple times
>she's my first
>I'm her second
>ends up telling me her ex was not who she wanted to be with
>says he was really wrong for her
>says she never loved him
>says she loves me
>i believe her
>says she stayed with him more out of necessity for a place to live than anything
>she tells me about how he once forced himself onto her and basically raped her and how she said nothing to anyone
>feel really bad
>feel regret
>realize there was nothing i could have done
>we both agree that things happened the way they should have and it's okay
>a few days ago i drive over to her place and she tells me she wants to go yell at her ex because of something she found out
>Beta me drives her over and stays in car at her request
>sit in car
>she knocks on his door
>I expect yelling
>they end up talking pretty casually
>i think i see him lean in for a kiss
>I think i see them hug atleast
>she laughs multiple times
>I wait and watch in the car for about 30 minutes
>she comes back
>i'm visibly upset
>drive her back to her place
>tells me to talk to her
>i don't say anything
>I tell her i'm stupid and it was a mistake that i ever came over
>she starts crying
>i start crying
>we cry in each other's arms for about an hour
>she tells me she loves me and doesn't want to lose me
>i tell her i don't want to lose her either
>She tells me she loves me
>I tell her i love her
>(cont)
>>16620269
and now the meat of the question
>been thinking more and more about her ex
>realize he was her first
>remember she wasn't his first
>feel sick at the thought of them having sex
>feel sick at the thought of them having sex for the 5 months she lived with him
>i message her and tell her i'm uncomfortable that she has that experience and i don't
>She and I haven't had much sex as we both don't have a place of our own
>she gets upset
>thinks all i want is sex
>I don't
>I'm just bothered that she has that experience and i don't
>she says sex with her ex is way different than what we have
>says there's a difference between making love and fucking
>feel sick
>I tell her i don't know the difference, she's the only one i've been with and i love her
>Tells me I can fuck whoever i want
>tell her i don't want to
>we kind of brush it under the rug and forget about it
>we talk about having a future
>sounds very realistic
>motivated to make it happen
>still feel a sort of resentment towards her and her past
>feel resentment towards myself for letting it happen
>not sure how to deal with it
I feel inadequate atleast sexually when i'm with her
Always wondering how much better her ex is than me at sex
Always thinking about all the things they've done together
How do i deal with it?
How do i deal with knowing she's had someone more experienced and probably prefers him sexually?
Is this all young foolish insecurity? I'm 20 and she's 18
I know she loves me and that I love her and that's all that should matter but why doesn't it to me?
Is this just stupid guy bullshit?
What do i do?
I've known this friend for about 5 years and he's always had my back.
His girlfriend broke up with him 2 months ago because he would break things and hold her down when he was angry. He's still heartbroken.
I invited him to go to a bar last night, but he was hanging out with a woman that he's not really interested in and told me some other time.
I went to the bar and saw his ex girlfriend for the first time since they broke up and we had a fun night and we wound up having sex. I initiated it.
I don't know what to do now. I feel horrible. It would destroy him if he knew. And he probably would want to beat the shit out of me.
Please help.
>>16620183
Put a dime in the jukebox pal.
This songs called 'What he don't know won't hurt him.'
Baitthread/10
Shit cunt friend/10
You fell for her bait
ok, advice is needed, so i got a tinder match
start texting, she wants to meet, she suggests coffee, before meeting she says
"but i have a boyfriend"
i come up with a witty comment but nevertheless i go into wtf mode, still proceed to say "whatever im still going" thinking it was a test
she says ok, we meet, we talk, she is a perfect 10/10 she does have a 3 month old boyfriend
my question is ....what is she thinking ? i didnt ask her what were her intentions, but having a boyfriend and been on tinder, and going out with another guy is kinda shifty
so what is your opinion on the subject ?
>>16620145
fuck her, send pics to bf to spare him further cuckoldry
I have been in the same situation.
And yes, this bitch is only looking for a friend. This is reallity answer.
But there is another point of view in this situation.
She fucking hates her bf and wants to jump the fence if you know what I mean. This is rare, she probally just wants a friend or whatever.
>>16620168
she did text me yesterday, casual chatting "thanking me for the date"
but i have no intentions to be friends with hot girls, but if she wants to be friends should I just leave all the cards on the table, either we have sex or might as well stop this
It makes me sad that everything in life revolves around money. All companies strive to maximise their profits despite what their missions and visions are, even charities strive to get as much money as possible, and everyone cares about money. Money seems to be the priority for everything.
Yep, pretty shitty existence. And chasing money doesn't make you happy.
Life is really just about acquiring skills and being useful.
>>16620187
This
>>16620144
No, but that's just what life is like. Money does matter.
Anyone know how to get bleach out of a baby's eyes?
>>16620011
try using amonia, makes it easier to scrub it out
>>16620011
How did you get bleach INTO a baby's eyes?
spray that bitch with a hose
Aight, so, my girlfriend's parents hate my guts. They've never seen me, they've never talked to me, and they refuse to. Her dad said the only thing he wants to say to me is to stay the fuck away from their daughter.
I believe they hate me because I'm a foreigner and because I'm a trans guy (professionally diagnosed, currently mid-transition, no Tumblr bullshit). I was accidentally outed to them earlier and they were mad as fuck. Her mom was upset, kept saying "why couldn't her daughter date someone normal" and that she "broke her heart". That kinda shit.
Her mom and dad both keep calling me a girl and flip the fuck out when she tries to correct them. They also make fun of my name (perfectly normal and common where I come from, but apparently with a certain pronunciation it sounds like a synonym for shit in their language).
I recently bought plane tickets to visit her in summer, I'm going to attend her graduation. She said it's important to her and she'd love for me to be there, but her parents unsurprisingly got really fucking mad about that. Said that they don't want me "ruining a family affair".
I don't need them to like me. I just wish they'd treat me like a human being. I already have shitty self-esteem and I hate to admit that this is making some serious dents on it. I'm really worried about what I'm gonna have to deal with in June when I have to meet them in person. I'd really like some advice on what to do with the situation and how to cope with their bullshit.
I'm 22 and she's 20, in case it makes any difference.
wow that's all kinds of gross. your pretend relationship is not going to work out, give up.
Forget what other people think... If this woman genuinely wants to be with you find a way to make it work. Nothing else really matters.
> Her mom was upset, kept saying "why couldn't her daughter date someone normal"
Well, she does have a point...
My parents got divorced when I was about 8. Since then, my father got a new wife and got a new home and kids. My mother though, which I spent the last nine years with before heading off to college, never got around to a new relationship. Those nine years, I have always celebrated New Year's Eve with her. I'd spend the evening with her until about 0:30, and then I would go to friends and she would go to bed.
However, I went to college in a different region of the Netherlands, and it is about four hours away by train. I already have made plans with friends, but they all live where I go to college. Meaning I either can't spend time with my friends or I can't spent time with my mother.
She's a single parent, and does not really have any friends. I just can't cope with the thought that she will be alone with NYE if I don't spend the evening with her. But if I would do that I won't be able to spend time with my friends which I really want to.
I hate to tell her that I am going to spend NYE with friends this year as it sounds like I love my friends more than her. How do I deel with this? I think I won't be able to enjoy the party guilt-free for leaving my mother alone on NYE.
Am I overreacting?
>>16619973
No, man. Spend time with your mother, it is a privilege to have such a kind mom. My mom is not nice to me, or the rest of my true family, (my dads side). She is consistently rude to me and never truly means what she says.
Cherish the fact that you have a very kind, gracious mother that you like spending time with and make sure that you spend every moment you can spare with her.
This is easily the best advice I've ever given.
>>16619973
spend it with your mom. you see your friends most of the time anyway, and there will be dozens of parties to go to throughout the year. your mom just wants the holidays.
>>16619973
Let her begin her life by giving her some space.
Does romance still exist? I just turned 19 today and I can't get this out of my head. I never had a girlfriend nor have kissed any girl, not even in the cheeks (except mother and grandmother ofc). I'm pretty average body except I'm 6'3. When i was in school teachers would always call me mastemind and ambitious with lifegoals. Im very introverted.
That being said, the thing is I just want to live a romance with a girl. I feel I'd be the happiest if that were to happen. Cuddle, look each other in the eyes for hours in bed and so on. I'm not talking about the "romantic dinner" romance but the pure one. Do girls who like this still exist? If yes where can I find them and how to spot them from a crowd? I have been thinking about just asking girls in publix something like "Hi I know this is out of the blue but do you want to live a dream love with me?". I'm really tired of being alone. I want to have a partner to love. Please please help me. Thanks
>how to spot them from a crowd?
You don't.
Just because you feel like a child would make your life better doesn't mean you should just have one.
You have to be prepared to become a father.
In this case, it's the same. Love as a couple can't be complete unless you're both individuals who share their life. You need to have your own interests as a person. Have something to share.
Love can't be lived to the fullest unless you're living your life to your fullest. And when you do that, you don't have time to be thinking of how good it would be to have a girlfriend or a partner, they simply come to your life.
>>16619830
Honestly, at your age, I was the same - you need to detach from that a bit. It's not impossible, but seeking out romantic love from just *anyone* is gonna lead to a bad time.
It happens a little bit more organically than that. I guess my advice is to stop daydreaming so much about it, but easier said than done, I know.
Been diagnosed with depression for over a year things have not gotten better no pills helped even had suicidal episodes. I cant feel interest or happy doing anything. Will weed help?
>>16619787
No weed is terrible for depression and only enables it more. Get a new doctor if current one isn't helping. Diet is important too.
>>16619787
It doesn't help, makes it worse and usually adds anxiety. Been there, done that.
>>16619787
Don't listen to these faggots. Blaze that shit up.im up here at my dad's house and everyone fucking hates me,I can't wait to go back home and smoke dat weed up with my brother.
I have a problem with not lasting long while having sex with a woman. I'm 22 years male and I need advice on how to last longer in bed.
Its embarrassing to only last about 2-3 minutes every time I have sex with a woman.
So no answer?
Do you regularly masturbate? It should build your stamina.
>>16619947
Yes I do but even with that, I cum too quickly.
Am I doing something wrong? Should I change my technique?
