Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1646. page
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I turn 21 in April, male. I have a full time job in a financial field that doesn't pay too bad but sucks all life energy out of me. Because of that and a few other things I suffer from depression.
I wanna quit my job and focus on the things I love - digital art, graphic design, making music, maybe some web design and coding related to it.
How do I go about starting to make a living from the above things? What do I need to do, what path do I need to take?
I know that it's possible but I need yout advice, because I'm kinda lost and shut down...
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>>16783872
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhRXn2NRiWI
You can't live on doing shit everyone enjoys doing unless you're extraordinary good at it.
It's hard to make a living from digital jobs as there are a lot of people hanging around online who want to make money from mom's basement and don't mind low pay rates. Anything delivered electronically is also open to competition from outsourcers in low-income countries, where folk with PhDs labour for $3 per hour.
If you want out of the finance world and enjoy making things, consider leveraging your design skills into a craft that can't be picked up by anyone in Bangladesh with an internet connection - real, physical items. It sounds to me like carpentry...
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What do you believe to be the worst thing that's happened to you?
How did you recover (if you did)?
(Any more info/adv is welcome) x *kissy*
The worst thing to happen to me would have to be a period of existential ennui of feeling very directionless in life. However, I'm happy to be able to say that I am now a happy and fulfilled carpenter, and everything is coming up roses.
>>16783844
seeing my sister kill herself and bleed out as an 11 year old boy.
12 years later and im still depressed.
Pornography.
Not kidding.
Nothing has made warped my image of women, of men, of social relationships, and of God than watching porn since I was 10 years old. I'm just now, at age 23, getting to a place where I can control my desire to look at porn, and I'm beginning to make a ton of friends, feel more confident with girls, am able to live the life I feel God wants me to live, and I feel free from the bondage of porn... but it's still a struggle. I want to look once in a while. But I try not to.
I don't have a dramatic moment like some...
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How do I stop laughing uncontrollably when I have sex?
I don't get any pleasure from it and to be honest I'm resentful of my boyfriend who gets so much pleasure from it while I get nothing.
And it just looks so ridiculous it makes me laugh so much, which he hates
Advice?
that's what i think pornstars do when they have sex with an inexperienced guy with a normal size dick
>>16783814
Do you have a normal size dick
They KY intense
try NO gas
>/thread
Eurofag here, seeking advice on how to kill oneself. No guns, no high buildings. Would it be sufficient to stick a pair of scissors into a power outlet? (240V; 50Hz)
Knife works.
You don't reallt want to die. If you wanted to die you'd have done it by now, it's easy, there are a million different ways. This is a cry for help.
Go and see a therapist, or call a crisis number.
So my pc recently took some water damage from a leak in the roof. I took it apart and air dried it and overall it works fine. The worst of the water was on my gpu, a gtx 970, with some water collecting on my cpus heat sink. however there are some bugs. My computer runs Inquisition flawlessly but cannot handle running Fallout 4 anymore, it just crashes after two steps. There are some clipping and other small video glitches on my game Vermintide as well. Now i have an older gtx 570 that I threw in and it handles running Fallout 4 and everything else, so i thought it was my video...
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>>>/g/
But in the long run, the problem is that you need to fix the leak in your roof. Learn some basic carpentry skills and you can undertake all manner of home maintenance and improvements.
hey /adv/!
im just here to ask what makes you happy?
Carpentry!
Well then you came to the wrong place, because that has nothing to do with advice.
>>>/b/
>>16783762
HOLY CHRIST HAVE YOU LEARNED I EVEN MADE A FUCKING THREAD ABOUT THIS SHIT
Dropped out of school due bad friends and drugs use (mostly soft drugs), i'm clean for a while now and broke with the bad part of my friend group. Now i want to go back to school and finally get my diploma and afterwards my degree at a university or high school. The first 2 years i will try to get a diploma in science and math, now the problem is i cannot decide what i should want to follow in high school/university my doubts are between computer science/Fysics/math or bio technologie. Anyone idea's how to figure this out i'm interested in all of them and i just...
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You're looking at the traditional academic-based career paths that get pushed in high-schools because they're basically a lifelong continuation of what you've been doing as course work. Bear in mind that there are many other careers that you might find more fulfilling, with strong economic sectors, excellent working environments, good pay, and much better job security than anything you're looking at. Have a think about finishing your diploma and then learning a useful and fulfilling trade such as carpentry.
>>16783775
I'm looking for a lifelong skill that i can develop and i'm willing to read a lot of books and a lot of effort into it, i like working with my hands and building tesla coils and stuf
This might be the wrong place to ask this, but how does one into casual sex? I'm 21, still a virgin (no one is aware of this fact) I dress well, have plenty of friends, including some great female friends, go to lots of outings. I don't masturbate, work out alot. I do use Tinder, and get plenty of matches there thanks to my looks and have even gonna out on a couple of dates where nothing happened. Generally I feel like I come across as boring, or friendly to girls and seems like every other guy I know easily finds and hooks up with women. I'm confident, attractive,...
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You need to learn to build sexual tension. You probably are viewed by girls as friendly or too innocent so they don't even try to flirt because they think you might find it off-putting or slutty.
p. s. : You don't get a lot of sexual experience from a lot of girls. Ons are pretty much like masturbating into a meat condom. You get a lot of sexual experience from a girl who is willing to explore your sexuality with you like a girlfriend who you fuck twice a day then talk about it and try something new.
>>16783786
Where/How do you find one of those? How into sexual tension. I can get phone numbers, set up dates. But it's also pretty kosher.
>>16783746
Go to a bar, look for a very drunk skank, take home, stick penis in vagina.
You will be terrible but she will be too drunk to complain.
Just say "sorry im out of practice" then go for round 2.
Achievement unlocked, lost virginity
i used to be socially inept but after working out for a few years i gained a lot of confidence. started uni about 5 months ago, i have been pretty social and made lots of new friends. however, most people just talk shit about others and even the minority who are nice dont know anything because they dont read so i can't have decent conversations with them.
i wish i was socially inept again. what should i do?
>i wish i was socially inept again.
You probably still are.
>>16783733
>even nice people are dumb
great. so because someone is half a decibel less intelligent (or not as well read) than you, they aren't worthy of your friendship.
ergo, you are the least intelligent of all the smart people. being just intelligent enough to pass, but so dumb that anyone less well read than you is not worthy of your kinds time.
ironic, dont you think? rather elitist too. maybe focus on that, do a little growth, and try to expand your interests...
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>i wish i was socially inept again.
what difference would it make?
now atleast you have the choice to talk or refrain from talking with people
Just realised I've been lead on for weeks
After asking out grill for date, got friend zoned hard. Now feel like a piece of absolute beta shit.
Any advice on how to move forward, or alternatively 'escape' friend zone.
I'm painfully aware of how awful this term 'friend zone' is but have no better substitute.
>>16783711
>escape the friend zone
this is something specific to people, and people are diverse. thats like asking how to make someone fall in love with you. actually, its literally asking how to make someone fall in love with you. if you already pulled out all your stops, then there is nothing left to do. she made her choice. and nothing except for organic experiences could change that (but rarely ever do). there is also the psycopath approahc but you likely couldn't pull it off...
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>>16783732
OP here I think that's some solid advice b/ro but any advice on how to move on as I have to work with her for at least the remainder of the year.
>>16783711
Stop frogposting for starters
Then stop using the term "friendzone" so you stop sounding like a fucking robot
While we're at it, stop acting like she's leading you on. You showed interest, you asked her out, she rejected you. End of story.
Put her out of your head. Stop seeing her in a romantic light and stop acting like she's a romantic interest to you. Stop flirting. Don't refer to you asking her out or you being interested in her. Get it in your head that the two of you...
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I don't think I've ever been this upset with my wife before. Here's the rundown.
>Wife and I discussing pot with parents.
>She tells me five years ago she smoked a ton with one of her friends at a convention.
>Slapped across the face by this, had no clue. Visibly upset.
>Her father lost his job to pot, his family shortly after.
>Figured I'd never get to smoke pot again due to her being traumatized...
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>I "assumed"
Yes, that's absolutely where this problem stems. You chose interpretation over communication.
How was she supposed to be "decent" enough to tell you something you didn't communicate to her?
Dude, go smoke a joint. You'll feel much better.
>>16783705
>i assumed
jesus dude, how are you mad at her for your own assumption
how is she supposed to know you'd assume she had a lifelong ban on pot because of her family history? you literally could have asked. you are mad at her for not assuming you'd assume something based off of a story she told you about her life?
>WELL I TELL HER ABOUT MY DRINKING
yeah she probably thinks that weird
>>16783712
>>16783722
Well it was a legit traumatizing part of her life. Her father nearly killed their mother and possibly raped her younger sister. I figured anything that might've been associated with her dick of a father would rock the boat. I know that making assumptions is fucking stupid and all that but given the situation I'd like to think it was a fairly logical decision.
I just turned 20
I spent most of that time trying to meet (imaginary) expectations of everyone else, probably to defend myself from them. Trying to be inoffensive and accommodating to everything I lost chances to have experiences and real relationships, and most likely things I dont even know I lost out on.
So I am only just learning to think independently. I am not that bitter, plenty of people never realise. But now that I am "redpilled" how can I have an honest personality if I have spent so long deluding myself? I'm a dude btw
Now is the time to start a new life, on a path of your choosing. Don't let other people's expectations hold you back from doing the things you love. You don't have to have a suburban home, 2 cars in the garage, and 2.4 kids if that's not the lifestyle that appeals to you. If you have a fascination for the beauty of natural grain wood, take up a career in carpentry and don't look back.
>>16783696
The other problem is that socialist Scotland has no opportunities. Anything that isn't traditional, profitable, or "working class" is laughed out the door
The highest goal anyone has is just to get by
>>16783735
Leah?
So I took this girl out on a date yesterday, first date, and we ended up fucking in the backseat of my car. Problem is, I barely managed to get hard in the first place and then I ended up going soft on her after a few minutes. I'm 21, it was my first time. I'm pretty disappointed in myself.
I'm probably gonna see her at least once more, and in an actual bed to boot. What can I do to make sure I can get/keep it up while we bang? Would it be a good idea to throw down a shot or two beforehand?
Also, I didn't use protection, and since we fucked...
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It's nerves, bro - you're overthinking it. This is really normal, particularly in this weird modern world in which people spend all their time studying and working on computers, rather than engaging in proper outdoors activities and working with their hands. Try taking up a manual hobby such as carpentry to help yourself relax, and when you're with your girl, enjoy the moment and avoid worrying about stuff.
And use a condom.
>>16783688
This
>>16783688
Thanks, carpentry-bro. So it's really nothing to worry about? I just don't wanna be stuck with ED at 21.
Plus who knows, maybe a little woodworking beforehand would help me work up some wood of my own.
First time using board. SO there is this girl in my class who is pretty cute but I have no idea how to approach her. She stays absolutely silent and I have no idea what her interests are because she doesn't use any social media of the likes. I have never really liked the traditional "Hey" so any suggestions or am I just a pussy?
If she's not into social media, she must have some way of occupying her free time other than staring at a phone screen. Maybe you share her interest. Try and work out what she enjoys doing out of class, and there you can build shared ground. For instance, if she's crazy about carpentry, grab some tools and have a go yourself!
Maybe spark up a conversation about her interests. You can start by talking about yours. Do you enjoy working with your hands or anything? Most women love a man who is productive.
Look into carpentry and woodworking for some examples, maybe build something so you can show it off and impress her!
>>16783673
>>16783669
I haven't approached her even once. Should I really just go up and say hey?
Hi, /adv/. Here is my situation.
First, I know that probably no one here is a fucking professional psychiatrist, so I'll spare you my life story and tell you what the deal is. So, basically I've been seeing doctors all my life. After all these years I've been diagnosed with several mental health conditions, everything including ADD, severe depression, anxiety, social anxiety, and more recently, PTSD after seeing my father after he died in a household accident from CO poisoning (yes, we've already confirmed it wasn't a suicide).
The accident...
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So I guess what I'm asking is, what the fuck could possibly be wrong with me?
inb4 suicide prevention, talk to a doctor about it, etc. I'm just interested in getting anonymous feedback at this point.
Please help me. I just want another perspective.
Firstly, I hope you get better. It looks like you have quite a few problems. I would recommend trying things such as meditation and mindfulness. It may not solve your problems, but it can make you much more tolerant to suffering. You seem like a very deluded person and I think the first step to overcome your pain is to understand it - so sit and relax, breathe deeply for a few hours and think about what makes you unhappy. Only understanding your emotions can make you progress. I can't give you any more tips than this: so basically try to be as aware as possible of your...
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