Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 837. page
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Alright /adv/, I need help.
I need you to help convince me it's time to end my LDR.
I know for a fact she was seeing another guy behind my back, and even lied about it to me for a week.
I can't shake the feeling that she's seeing some other guy (no idea if it's the same guy, likely not) right now.
She's acting fucking weird, not responding to my texts, and opened a snap I sent her an hour ago and didn't respond.
Basically, I just don't fucking trust her after everything that happened, and I know that she's seen other guys while she had a boyfriend in the past.
Help me /adv/, this is tearing me apart and I just can't get over it. I'm just so afraid of losing her. I'm so afraid I'm going to burn something that could actually be good one day.
>>17131161
You need to be convinced to leave someone who you don't trust, is cheating and makes you feel like shit?
You're conflicted. Pick a side an run with it.
>>17131161
inb4 op doesn't listen to any advice and keeps doing the same shit anyways.
How do I talk to a stranger without seeming creepy? Consider a stranger someone you've only talked to a few times, or not at all.
>>17131139
By having something relevant or interesting to say.
I've always had a hard time just striking up conversations
and this stranger just happens to be the girl I like
I have browsed through google and couldn't find anything of relevance or close to it at all, I don't even know what you would call it.
This may seem like a dream or a fantasy, I know that but I wanted to check if there might be a job like this.
So I am looking to be hired by preferably a game making company or any company at that, which can benefit by having an extra person at hand. But through online communication and for free. You might call me a retard or an idiot for even thinking about this and posting it, but I want to find a future job with professional training in a place that I would like.
If that is too long: I want to find someone that can teach me their art or profession and work for them in return. Any advice on how I can find this?
Pic unrelated.
work for me anon, i'll teach you web development. only prerequ is you must be male and not female. no joke email me at [email protected]
I always wanted an apprentice.
that's called an internship when it's useless or an apprenticeship when you learn something and don't just do stupid shit for free.
btw anon, on 4chans /vg/ they have a ton of amateur game devs. You can offer yourself there.
I'm going over to my crush's house tomorrow to study for an AP exam we both have. Right before I'm about to leave I want to ask her out on a movie date. The problem is that it won't just be me and her studying, there is another girl too and I'm afraid that if I just ask my crush to talk in private it is going to seem weird. How should I go about asking her out? Should I just man up and do it in front of the other girl? Also any ideas on what exactly to say?
Btw I'm driving the second girl home so I can't just wait for her to leave and then do it.
Any help is appreciated
>>17131075
the worst case scenario is you hand the keys to the 'second girl' and say 'hey can i meet you in the car, theres something i forgot to ask anonnette' then you turn back around acting all goofy like it was a silly thing you forgot to ask her to see XX movie this weekend'.
to be honest if you find it hard or awkward to find a way to ask her out, chances are you arent close enough for her to say yes. otherwise you'd be able to find a way organically.
good luck eihter way, i say go for it.
>>17131075
See if your can get there early and do it. Also remember that it's not about how you do it but that you do it. Don't let yourself make excuses not to do it. Even if you have to do it in front of the other girl. Just make yourself vulnerable and be honest. "Hey crush I'm attracted to you, let's go on a date sometime." It doesn't have to be perfect, if you make a big deal of it, she will too.
>>17131093
I can't get there early. Do you think I should try and get the other girl in on it so she would purposefully fuck off?
I still have acne all over my body, but especially on my forehead. No medicine I've tried has been very successful. How do I get rid of it?
>>17131069
And here in darker lighting.
>>17131069
>>17131071
name the medicines you've tried. prescription stuff only please.
>>17131076
No prescription, only maximum strength over the counter stuff.
Gay 20 some year old here. Everyone is so sex/open relationships/poly positive in my social group and it makes me really uncomfortable. I don't feel like I'm a prude, but I only really have romantic or sexual feelings for one person at a time, and I get jealous and feel bad when someone I'm into has sex with other people as well. It seems to me to devalue sex and our relationship.
I like the people I hang out with, but none of them seem to understand where I'm coming from at all. The person I'm currently into said he doesn't understand jealousy, even.
Should I find new people to hang out with or what? Is there any hope for me as a homo seeking monogamy?
And to that end, what do you think about poly or open relationships? I hear they work for some, but personally, every instance of it I've witnessed stems from some insecurity or lie, and I know first hand it can really hurt.
>>17131054
All this open/poly shit is today's kids justifying being a slut.
yeah you just have to find new friends.
>>17131054
I know exactly where you're coming from OP. I don't think that I'd be able to handle a crush/SO having sex with other people. I'd feel jealous and betrayed too, and I think that's okay.
People argue that, because of the reliability of contraceptives and STI prevention/treatments, monogamy is a dated concept, and that we have to move forward as a culture by accepting that polygamy is the future. I guess there's probably some truth in that, but I just can't accept it either. I really like the idea of mating for life and sticking it out with somebody that I've got a real history with, so I think I'm going to hold onto it despite what others say.
I think another part of the conversation that's missing here is just that, most people who advocate for monogamy just don't bother preaching it, because it's still the norm by a huge margin. There are lots of really good reasons to be monogamous, even if lots of people paint it as an inevitable decision to become bitter toward your SO.
>GF saw some porn I was watching
>It was a MFF threesome
>She's intrigued but isn't into girls- She says that she wants to explore her interest in them but she isn't comfortable actually DOING anything with anyone yet for the same reason that you or I wouldn't be down with "experimenting" with a dude
>She claims to be straight but also admits that she's never even attempted to think of girls in that way before
>she went to Catholic school for her childhood so she never even really had the chance to explore her own sexuality, it took me forever to get her over her own guilt from masturbating which she still feels kind of uncomfortable over unelss I'm there
What would be the best way for me to test the waters for her attraction to women? I was thinking about watching some les porn together while getting down and dirty or chucking the o'l oculus rift on her head with one of those lesbian porn videos while I eat her out, is this a good way to go about it?
I want maximum chance of success with her being comfortable about it. I think she might be cool with it because of past experiences I've had with her but I'm not sure and neither is she
>>17131051
I'm not gonna lie, if my boyfriend wanted to watch PORN to TURN HIMSELF ON while DOING STUFF WITH ME I would be so insecure and uncomfortable. It doesn't matter if your intent is to "see if she likes gurlz" (which is stupid as fuck, porn is the most unrealistic portrayal or sexuality, and should not be a medium to help somebody explore ever).
I would be especially uneasy if it were two girls too.. Just the idea of my boyfriend having it on around me and expecting me to like it.
I watch FFM porn, have kissed/done stuff with women... But that would make myself and most women very insecure
Seems kind of weird way to explore that. Let her do it on her own, masturbate to lesbian porn or something.
>>17131068
nonono
porn for her bruh
not for me
I don't need to watch porn to be attracted to my girl
>>17131120
>masturbate to lesbian porn or something.
that's what I was suggesting
She's kinky and down to try most things, but catholic school did a number on her. She's willing, but feels shame and all that fun stuff. We're extremely close and she knows she can tell me anything (including if she's uncomfortable) and she wants to be able to do all kinds of kinky stuff, but the shame creeps up for stuff like masturbating because it's been nailed into her so hard that masturbating is the worst, dirtiest thing ever and that only aberrant do it
Okay /adv/. I'm really tired of spending my youth in isolation. At this rate I'll never experience things. My situation:
>19, female, live in rural California
>going off to a very small libarts college in the fall
>spend most of my days studying and reading in my house
>moderately anxious
What I want:
>To go to parties
>hang out with people
>enjoy my time and be outgoing
I'm also chubby but have a nice face and am a slightly thinner bustier white version of Ashley Graham
How do I go about achieving all of this? I wanna have the classic state school college kid experience.
Which state? Just curious.
>>17131055
California
From my experience, since you're going to college, there will be plenty of opportunities to be social/party/outgoing. It will depend on your class peeps, but I would recommend:
-holding/participating in study groups (or clubs); you can get to know people better, and be productive at the same time
-it may be slowgoing, but if you can make a few good friends, you can host your own house parties (they're pretty popular in Sacramento, and I imagine it would be more spacious in rural CA).
-Some classes give you more of an opportunity to be adventuresome (e.g. geology, field-oriented). It makes bonding easier when you're on your feet performing group tasks. If you need to fill some credits, do these!
Are there other guys out there who need to talk a lot? How do you deal with it?
I have the daily urge to talk, connect, and discuss ideas and feelings. I get really, really agitated and on edge when i can't talk with someone. It's like therapy to me.
But as a man, I get the overwhelming feedback no one wants to hear that shit, especially not women. My own girlfriend will start zoning my ass out because, "I talk more than most guys." When I speak less and act more "quiet type," I get infinitely more pussy even from my girlfriend.
I'm rapidly approaching the point where I'm just going to give the people what they want and stop talking. The flip side though is that I don't really need anybody else except to connect with and talk with... and I can't really stand hypocrisy. Because you know women.... running their mouths off about shit you don't care about all the time.
But I listen. Then they don't listen. It makes me upset to the point where I want to redpill and just fuck em without ever caring if they love me.
You sort of went on a rant towards the end there, but sure. I'm like that. I enjoy conversation about things that matter more often than not.
This is the only reason I'm on 4chan.
>>17131015
kinda but not to your extent. i love to talk but if i dont see anyone for a few days im fine. but hwen im with people i will non stop start yapping. when i date it becomes very clear that im a very talkative person and will ramble and jump from one topic to the next without warning. I've only ever dated one person who was caught zoning out a bit. the rest seemed to listen. not sure how much they REALLY cared, but the person im seeing now seems genuinely interested in most every thing i say. kidna new, hard to tell, but the first day we met i unloaded all of my 'weird' on them (i feel cringy saying that but its the best way to describe it) and they ended up coming back the next night.
but i date dudes. and when dudes actually hang out it tends to be because of a genuine interest in one anohter, regardless of orientation. if girls are being twats and saying you talk to much, you might talk to much. you just gotta find the right people to listen.
consider talking with friends. worse case scenario you go onlien and look for someone who likes to ramble as well and just call them once a day for 'therapy'.
i actually have that with anon, but it was more he calls me and tells me stories til i fall asleep, but since then (its been like 2 years) its been more of a monthly catch up
>>17131030
Apologies. I'm still raw from a fight with my girlfriend. it pisses me off to no end how women beg and plead for attention and then, when it's my turn and I need my women, they're off on some fuck shit.
>This is the only reason I'm on 4chan.
Yes. I've been coming back to advice for years. I don't give a shit about /b/ or any other board besides /fit, but I am forever on advice because it's one of the only places people can discuss how they truly fucking feel. The world can't handle honest conversation unless it's over an anonymous image board. pathetic.
>>17131034
>and when dudes actually hang out it tends to be because of a genuine interest in one anohter
Yes. Absolutely this. They either like you or they want to fuck you, one or the other, or else they wouldn't be there lol.
>you just gotta find the right people to listen.
Thank you for reminding me. It's as simple as spending less time with the people who can't roll with it.
The shitty thing is that people like my girlfriend literally beg me to stay... and then bitch at me after I stay and "talk too much" it's like bitch why the fuck did you beg me to stay then you fucking monkey.
I need to reexamine my relationship, practice patience by abstaining from as much talking, and find people who actually want to listen. it's so fucking perverse that people give me all sorts of compliments but then can't handle what caused them to give me compliments:
>You've changed me for the better. You've really helped me be a better person and see how to do that
Well how the fuck do you think that happened? By talking.
25yo, m, my girlfriend is 25yo too;
5 years in a relationship, which is the only serious relationship me and her ever had in our lives (we both never had other sexual partners too). We live together.
My girlfriend is a great person and I respect her; she's really into this relationship, very commited and loyal. I'm perfectly aware that her biological clock is ticking and she should have her first child in the next 2-3 years. For me that would mean getting married and, of course, starting a family. Recently I've noticed a lot of pressure on that comming from her parents (can't blame them to be honest), even though my gf tries to keep them away from our relationship. The only issue is - I don't think I'm ready for that.
I work for a big company and I'm good at what I'm doing. My career is going great and I want to keep it that way. But in order to do that, I need to focus on my job and constantly improve my skills. I doubt this is a good time for me to start a family.
On the other hand, having a family is my girlfriend's goal in life. She's this type of woman who likes to keep the house cozy and clean, she's caring and she will definitely be a great mother. A perfect future wife to be honest...
Recently things aren't that great between us, maybe because of the pressure she gets, maybe because I spend less time with her than I used to. I've been thinking - maybe this is a good moment to break up? My feelings towards her are not as strong as they used to be for some time now, and with my current goals in life, maybe I'm just wasting her time? Maybe we will both be more happy if we were with partners who share the same goals in life? On the other hand I know that I will want to start a family in the next couple of years, just not now...
This is an "one way or another" type of situation. Either I propose or break up, there's nothing in between. I don't expect anyone here to tell me what to do, I'd rather appreciate stories of anons who were in a similar situation.
>>17131014
In case you were wondering, yeah I've met someone else, there's a great chemistry between us (maybe even better than ever was between me and my current gf), but I don't get myself involved in any way. I just cannot be a douchebag and cheat on my gf.
I'm in the same boat anon.
Bump
>>17131028
>in case you were wondering
you say this like its not important.
>i cannot just be a douchebag and cheat on my gf
unless your plan was to cheat but never leave your gf, then its just as douchebaggy. you're leaving her for some one else. its douchey no matter when you end up sleeping with that person.
that being siad, i dont think its god awful. i think its a little unhealthy that you are codependent though. planning to jump right out of one relationship to another. as for your situation as a whole:
on the one hand, your "its one thing or another" soudns like bullshit. you are trying to force a certain outcome by saying there is no middle ground. you are saying
>she wants a family NOW
>i want a family in a few years
>ergo, i should break up with her, forcing her to wait at least a few years to start a family
its not like she can walk up to some guy on a street and have his babies just because you break up wtih her. no matter what she has to wait at least 'a few years'. so do you want it to be with you, or someone else?
on the other hand, you pretty much say you want it to be with someone else. you like someone else. this is the real motivation behind everything. you are pretending its an after thought but its really the motivation. and i cant blame oyu. its your first relationship and she wants to settle down. thats scary as fuck. you would never experience... life.
the only reason you are making this thread is cuz you DONT want to feel like a villain. but there is no 'right time' to break up with someone. id argue there isnt really a 'wrong time' either.
if you dont want to date her than dump her. you dont want to date her, so dump her.
Everyone I live with is incapable of work, and I myself had to use all of my last check for rent.
I've been doing some of those survey site things, but it takes a really long time to rack up enough points to cash out.
Is there a faster alternative?
Get some food stamps you cretin
>>17131006
We have food stamps friend, we're waiting for them to get re-certified.
>>17131001
Make those people who are truly incapable of work look around and check if they're not eligible for some help by the government. Even if not a full grant, maybe at least easing the strain of you having to support them.
I've been on adderall for a little over a year, I'm at 30mg a day split between two pills. It isn't as effective as it once was and I don't think I should go higher than this.
I seem to build up a tolerance very quickly and my regular dose barely feels like it does anything other than not make me want to nap, and if I take it regularly for straight days it starts to fuck with me - giving me intense anxiety, paranoia, sometimes even some mild hallucinations.
I'm considering switching, what are the other meds like ritalin like? How do they compare to adderall? What side effects have you noticed?
That could be a tolerance to the amp salt. Try dexmethylphenidate (Focalin) it's supposed to have less side effects compared to methylphenidate (Ritalin). Talk to your doctor not 4chan as medications don't effect everyone the same
Or pre-existing mental conditions like schizophrenia
I get nortrilen right now and Ritalin on Friday, but I know someone who already takes it: Side effects were losing weight, not giving a fuck / more confidence and not being able to sleep as long. I hope I get "only" the same side effects, and not all the bad ones. It's different for everybody, you have to take it to know it
And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when men revile you, and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be very glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in this manner they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Matthew 5:2-12 - The Beatitudes
Join Us in Prayer and Worship: https://www.youtube.com/user/IHOPkc/live
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John 14:12-14
12 Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greater works than these shall he do; because I go unto my Father.
13 And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.
14 If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it.
John 15:7, 16
7 If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.
16 Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.
John 16:23-24
23 And in that day ye shall ask me nothing. Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, he will give it you.
24 Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full.
Matthew 17:20 And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.
Matthew 21:21 Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done.
Mark 10:52 And Jesus said unto him, Go thy way; thy faith hath made thee whole. And immediately he received his sight, and followed Jesus in the way.
Luke 17:6 And the Lord said, If ye had faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye might say unto this sycamine tree, Be thou plucked up by the root, and be thou planted in the sea; and it should obey you.
Acts 6:8 And Stephen, full of faith and power, did great wonders and miracles among the people.
>>17130952
There's not enough room in heaven for all of us. For some of us, this life is all we will ever have.
>>17131261
Heaven is not a convention hall, there's room for anyone who sets to going there. Not everyone elects to do that, though.
As the title states, I'll be attending a local 4-year university this Autumn, and I will be majoring in Accounting. I am primarily interested in becoming a CPA (Certified Public Accountant), and one of the requirements my state has to become one is 150 hours in college.
Now, assuming I wouldn't take any summer courses and I would do 12 - 15 hours per semester, I would be looking at 5 - 6 years at my University. Now, if this were the case, should I just go for a Master's degree, and which one should I go for, between an MBA (Master of Business and Administration) and MS in Accounting -- both of which are offered by the University I will be attending.
Isn't CPA on the top ten list for being automated out of existence?
You might as well become a truck driver.
>>17130998
Well, in that case, what would a good career be for someone who's adept with numbers, besides the obvious mathematician field?
>>17131067
You sure give up on your dreams fast over what one anon says
Is 3 or 4 hours really that far away? My best friend of 15+ years is moving out of state. I kinda feel like I wont see him anymore. Even though he's already admitted to getting in a place with a guest room for me to visits. I ave social issues so I can't figure out if I'm freaking out just because it's change.
>>17130944
I live 3 hours away from my parentd and I tend to see them at least once a month and we speak once or twice a week. Don't know if that's the answer you're looking for.
>>17130944
A couple of my best friends moved to Japan and we still vid call a lot and visit each other 3-4 times a year. Sure money helps but you're only couple of hours away, a bus ticket is like $20? It just makes the weekends that you do hangout even more action packed.
>>17130978
>>17130983
Thanks that this is good to hear.
![jak_odzyskac_faceta[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/iuTyWif.jpg "jak odzyskac faceta[1]")
