Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 68. page
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How do I lose my humanity? I'm dead serious, I hate my normal life. I want to wake up as a tree. They seem peaceful. Tips?
> inb4 joke replies
you can't, that's now how it works
Are you fourteen or sixteen, first?
>>17354613
Why did you lie when you ticked the box?
>gf is 28 with a master's in comp sci + a job at a university that pays wells
>I'm 22 with a bs in biology and have a job that pays around 30k a year
>my gf is constantly harassing me to go back to school, despite the fact I graduated in may
>she keeps telling me to go write to some professors at universities in my area ( there's a lot) to do research for them
>keep telling her I can't work for free...
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Try something along the lines of "listen I love you and appreciate your concern for my future but I honestly have ZERO interest in doing that and I need you to respect my decision."
If my significant other ever tried to control me, what I enjoy, or my plans for the future I'd tell her to learn some fucking respect.
please tell me the program you found. I'm using my bachelors in biology to work at the post office. if my girlfriend told me to get a masters I'd set our apartment on fire
hey /adv/, time for the old "friend one or friend two" question.
my birthday is coming up on the 23rd of july. i'm going to bring some friends up to the cabin, and i can only bring 3 because my car will only hold 4 people. two of them are for sure going, but the problem is i don't know who to invite 3rd. i've narrowed it down to 2 friends.
FRIEND 1: we've been friends for about 2 years and i've wanted to bring him to the cabin for a while. however, recently he has not been a very good friend. it seems like he mooches off of me...
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You can't please everyone, OP. Friend numero dos for sure he sounds like a friend that will last, and as do memories, so choose wisely.
Well you gave a super long rant about #1 and the only "negative" thing you had to say about #2 was that you haven't been friends as long. It sounds like you should invite #2
>>17354540
not gonna bother reading their descriptions cuz it doesn't matter.
first and foremost, happy birthday. my birthday is july 24th but im celebrating the 23rd as well. not with a cabin in the woods, but yeah.
deep down you know who you want to bring, so just bring that person. he might not be able to go and you can invite the other without guilty anyway. but invite the person you want, nto the person that logic or culture dictates should go.
who do you want?
and if that doesnt ring...
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>Someone hit the scanner for the gate key at our apartment over the 4th of July weekend
>Just came home for work with a note on my door saying "Consider this a $2643 warning"
>Saw the same note on other apartment doors
Is this a bill for damages to the gate that I didn't do? Did my landlord came up with the bright idea of assuming that being a tenant is a valid enough reason to blame us for the damages.
Is that all the note said?
>>17354548
There was a lot of bitching about the tenants' guests, which I don't have any and letting people into the gate at 2:31 am (one gate uses a card scanner while the other the person dials a code that calls your cellphone number and you dial 9 to open the gate).
Keep the note, but I assume he is just being a dick. Maybe he plans to add $2643 dollars to everyones rent for a month? Regardless, he can't legally make all of you pay for it unless that's part of your lease/rental agreement, which would be odd.
Hey guys, lately I feel like I can't shut off the voice in my head and enjoy things, specifically my girlfriend. Her and I aren't close enough to visit each day, so the majority of our interactions are through phone. We recently started dating, and since we started its been hard for me to stop worrying about what impression I'm leaving on her. She tells me very often and with such genuinity how much she enjoys all of me and loves me; I'm convinced she has no walls built around herself towards me. I've said the same thing to her and I meant it too. But...
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>>17354483
What exactly are you overthinking ? Your own issues or things with her?
>>17354501
I guess it's both. I start to overthink things with her, and I catch myself doing it so I tell myself to stop doing it. When that happens it feels like my brain just stops.
Well...
I believe a man shouldn't have a woman in the center of his life. I don't mean we shouldn't love her, yes, we should and it's fucking awesome for both sides in many ways, but when we are talking about priorities, woman shouldn't be number one.
And I believe they don't want you to put them on number one. If you do so, you'll stop following your life and dream, stop growing, sacrificing it to be with her.
Bottom line, puting her first makes you and her sad and less atracted to each other or life. Therefore, you should...
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Is it considered okay for a boyfriend to talk about the women he finds hot? Am I supposed/its normal to get uncomfortable with that or am I just being too anal?
I would be uncomfortable with a girl who's uncomfortable with not being the only hot girl in existence.
>>17354489
I'm completely aware of that, but wouldn't it be respectful to not say certain things to your girlfriend?
You chose your partner for a reason. I do understand that "look at the menu, but don't buy" thought process.. But there's no reason to be talking to someone you consider a partner about this unless your gf is a closet dyke. Are you TRYING to make her jealous? This is manipulation.
Be respectful, save it for the dudebros. It just makes you look thirsty anyways.
Welp this is the second time in a week that I had constipation, what do?
Are you drinking enough water? Getting enough fiber (so certain fruits/vegetables/beans/oats/other good sources of fiber) in your diet? If yes to both of these, you should probably talk to your doctor.
>>17354469
try doing a few bodyweight squats per day or walking for 5-10 minutes.
>>17354750
pretty much anything on that list that looks easy and involves glutes or abdominal muscles. Sit-ups, crunches, leg raises, squats,
>Does mental retardation get better?
I did a lot of drugs and it fucked up my brain. I'm not sure how, if it was from oxygen deprivation or the drugs themselves, but I'm not the same. I've been sober from drugs for over 6 months, but the "cognitive improvements" are slow. Some days I'm pretty lucid, playing with 75% of a deck so to speak, but those days are sprinkled in between weeks of retardation.
I feel like my mind is slipping, as if my mental condition is getting worse and worse, and reality is creeping...
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>>17354450
was diagnosed with a 'mild' form of brain damage earlier this year, MdDS. no idea how i got it. docs claimed i could have just stressed myself hard enough to make it happen. total bullshit.
even now that I've mostly recovered i still have issues. namely my shitty memory and poor coordination.
ive definitely come back... 'different' and i kinda get you. i definitely feel like a different person than the guy who had this body in january. but i am who i am and theres no reason...
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>>17354464
I'm just feeling really blue about it man. I just wish I could concentrate on what I was doing instead of worrying about people thinking I'm retarded. Even when I'm not around people, I'm often ruminating about whatever stupid thing I did or said earlier.
I just want to be intelligent enough so I can socially cohere, or at least learn how not to be a total leper. I'm not asking to be an astronaut, I just want to live and function normally like everyone else.
It's so depressing man.
>>17354713
i feel ya. but hteres certainly a learning lesson in here, wouldn't you say? not to rub it in just... now you know better.
even now that im recovered i still get it. i am able to run my business but theres still aspects of my intelligence that seem... affected. if i bring it up casually to someone, especially potential romantic partners, they quickly lose interest.
lost a lot of friends over the whole ordeal.
There's a girl at my college who I have a crush on. We're friendly acquaintances and haven't spent a lot of time together outside of hanging out at one party. My college is getting close to breaking up for summer and I want to put my foot in the door and get a way to speak to/see her over the break.
Should I just be straightforward and ask her for her number?
>>17354442
Ehhh. If summertime is approaching and she's going back home for three months, now wouldn't be the optimal time. What do you think is gonna happen? You'll make such a big impression that she'll spend the whole summer texting you?
Better to wait until the new school year, or just forget it.
This is a sixth form college in England, we're all local.
>>17354460
Oh, well, in that case just ask for her number and hope you're able to act charming on instinct.
![i-draw-what-its-like-to-be-in-a-long-distance-relationship-8__880[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/SQWaP5U.jpg "i-draw-what-its-like-to-be-in-a-long-distance-relationship-8__880[1].jpg")
I'm in an ldr with someone a state away. I am a server, and have very little in savings. She keeps saying it makes more sense to move up to her and then find a better job. Would it be better to find a job near me and save up for a few years, then try to transfer/find another job, or to just move up to her and struggle with rent for a while while I look for new jobs?
>>17354404
Is she not paying her own rent? Or would you not be living together? I'm confused.
>>17354410
Yeah living together. Right now we both live with our parents. She has a cushy government job, great benefits, etc. and could easily afford rent. I, on the other hand, would have to struggle at the level I'm at now.
Shitty job and living with your parents vs Shitty job and living with your girlfriend.
You know what you have to do.
How do I make friends online? How do I get into a skype group or a community of like minded people?
That sort of thing used to happen so naturally when I was younger. Now I find myself struggling to even find a place online to call home.
>>17354402
what are your interest?
>>17354420
Horror novels, writing, mental illness and physical deformity, David Lynch, dreams, the Souls series of video games, music, isolation, being displeased with myself and people in general.
>>17354429
lmao
I don't know why I even try. I'm friendless myself.
I'd rather advice to learn how to be comfortable by your own.
Pic Unrelated
I met this girl in 2014. We immediately clicked. She was amazing. Beautiful, smart and was so easy to talk to. We became best friends. We said I love you to each other a lot , even when she was dating other dudes. I found out a lot about her. She's cheated, but at least on retards who give her constant shit so I didn't really pay much attention to it.
Soon Summer 2015 happens. She breaks up with shitty boyfriend, I comfort her. We get intimate. We soon, like a week or 2 after last bf start sexting. Kinda date, more sexual than anything but we...
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Another month of moping. Then I find out just how many people she sexted whilst dating me,cheated on all my friends and left them all.
Realize I loved a whore. Realized I wasted almost 2 years of my life on someone who only wanted me for quick sex.
I get angry and call her out. Make sure everyone knows shes a thot. She always denied that. And when I'd ask about it she'd get angry and tell me to fuck off.
But I call her out and she denies it. Loses more friends. Loses almost everyone. Still tells people I'm only salty because She wouldn't date...
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You know, this isn't a story but, when my ex told me she was bi it fucked things up. It made things weird and made me doubt her so much. Ahe had a friend thst she'd hang out with and they'd always play around, but up until that point it didn't bother me.
If you're bi just be open about it.
Your fault for falling for her trucks, but her fault for being a conniving whore in the first place.
GF of 5 years mother has been diagnosed with cancer. Survival rate less than 3% Her mother is young. I am usually pretty good with emotional/moral support etc but feel really out of my depth here.
Anyone been through a similar situation have any advice for me? Want to do all I can to help, but pretty worried about saying the wrong thing..
This is a really shit situation, I feel sorry for you guys
If you've been together for 5 years, I don't think you'd be in risk of saying the wrong thing. Just tell her you're there for her, and for her to feel free to talk to you anytime. Otherwise, don't bring it up.
It'll be tough, but you'll grow stronger together. Good luck
>>17354357
just be able/available to listen to her, don't say anything to comfort/console her unless she explicitly asks for it. she might become distant, let her have space if she needs, and take any hurtful/rude comments to heart
>>17354368
Thanks. Seems to be along the lines of the advice Ive found online. Just tricky to know the times she needs space vs when I need to be there. She's quite emotional at the best of times, and when she's emotional she can be prone to poking for arguments to blow off steam. There'll be a bit of eggshell walking/punchbag simulation coming up I think. Obviously nothing compared to what she's going through with such an ill mother but just something I thought of when trying to gauge the situation in general.
I...
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lets start by saying im slightly overweight. like 190lbs 6'1. but im currently on a diet and its going slow and steady.
i noticed that some days, especially when its hot outside. i barely have enough energy to do some activities.
for example if i workout, eat, and do bunch of other stuff my energy is almost depleted and i must sleep/rest.
this is not the same issue in the winter, but similar.
Drink more water. Get one of those liter bottles at a convenience store, fill it up before you go to work and drink the whole thing before your shift ends.
>>17354355
You're probably not eating enough food and you're not getting enough water. Whats your BMR, what kind of exercise are you engaging in, whats your actual daily caloric intake, and what do your macros look like?
>>17354372
i suspect that's the issue. i usually sweat more than usual and its constantly moist here
>>17354398
i don't have all the stats to update you on this. but generally i exercise 10 mins a day and eat about 2.5k calories
23 year old virgin here, might be losing it soon to a girl who is crazy about me.
Any tips/advice?
Going to some drinks where she'll be there and I will be able to make my move.
I'll make sure no spaghetti escapes along with conventional protection of course.
>>17354350
>girl who is crazy about me
I wish I knew this feel
Don't drink too much. Whisky dick is real.
Sex isn't that hard. Just make sure you know where the clitoris is.
Eat her out. To orgasm, if you can, because it lowers her threshold for orgasming on your dick by a lot. If you can't bring her to orgasm with your tongue (sometimes mood / pressure of the first time with a new person gets to them), it will at least make her hornier and more likely to orgasm when you put it in her.
Watch some videos that explain how best to do it. Remember that rhythm is more important than pressure - if she starts...
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>>17354350
If you death grip your dick when you jerk off stop that shit right now or you are never going to be able to cum and it'll be embarrassing as fuck.
