Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 71. page
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Hey /adv/. I've got a good one for you today.
Last night I was with a girl and going to town with her on the foreplay (she literally squirted on me) and by the time she said "I want you" I pulled out my condom, but after a bunch of time fiddling with it I could barely get it on, and when I did I couldn't get it up again and we stopped, much to my embarrassment.
This happened the first time I had sex too. I wasn't that hard when I put it in and then it got soft while we were fucking.
How can I go about fixing this? I'm really...
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Stop fapping to porn. Happened to me with 2 girls and then twice when I started dating my gf, all in a row.
Seriously, stop masturbating.
>>17353883
How long did it take you to be able to maintain erections after you stopped?
>>17353883
This dude's mostly right. Masturbating is fine, provided you're not overdoing it and also STOP FAPPING TO PORN.
If you can't masturbate to completion using only your imagination, your dick is broken and you need to stop playing with it for a while.
Whats happening to me /adv/?
>go out for a meal with my large family
>didn't talk to anyone, no one bothered talking to me
>don't care as I just can't wait to leave anyway
>for about 30 minutes all I could think about was how embarrassed and angry I was that I wore a similar dress code to the waiters/waitresses
>spent a further 30 minutes obsessing about a tiny stain on my top, again angry
>one of my family has a baby and everyone is doing that goofy cute shit with it (got your nose etc.) and I feel so uncomfortable at the idea of even saying hello to it (it's a fucking baby why should I even acknowledge it)
>remembered something embarrassing I did, had an urge to go in the toilet and trash it
Can someone tell me what I might be going through? Actually concerned for myself.
>>17353770
You sound like Patrick Bateman.
>>17353770
How intense does this shit get? Just cause you aren't 100% worried about others doesn't mean your sociopathic. If you ever purposfully throw someone under the bus for personal gain than you can worry. If you are super competetive and dont care whose feelings you hurt, or if you can cheat on your gf and not let it bother you.
That what happen from prolonged isolation from the outside world.
I'm trying to be engaging when talking to girls but I think I'm just boring. When I talk to dudes, or just plain strangers I can make them laugh without even trying.
you're being overtly hateful towards women in general right now, you might want to tone that down when you're trying to impress one.
>>17353768
I'm not sure how you're getting any of that
>>17353812
and yet I don't have any problems engaging women in conversation
So I just snuck out to go to a friends house and on my way home I got pulled over by the cops because I wasn't wearing a helmet on my bike. It was 3:50am and they called my parents but luckily no one answered. They didn't leave a message. They told me to just ride home as fast as I could. I'm 15 and live in South Australia. So my question is, will they follow this up and call my parents again tomorrow or will they just leave it?
I know this might be gay asf but I'd appreciate anything you guys can tell me.
>>17353740
I dont fucking know how shit rolls in shitpostlandia.
but cops getting all butthurt for a helmet are all insecure cucks
literally affects you and only you. You choose to be safe or not, noone else.
>>17353740
>15
Fuck off, kid.
>>17353751
forgot to tell u to >n-joy ban
underagefag
I was looking at a screenshot of a conversation on 4Chan and some of the posts had a (you) at the end of number at the top. Does that indicate that the person who took the screenshot was he one who posted that message or does it mean that the message was directed to the person who took the screenshot?
The newfaggotry is strong with this one. Lurk moar, fagit.
Hey /g/
I'm really confused right now. So I've been talking to this girl for a week and it's just amazing, we've got the same interests, hobbies, views on everything, even same birthday. We usually talk for 5-6 hours non stop.
I told her that I like her and she said she likes me as well.
But here's the catch, she used to be one of my best friend's Ex Girlfriend (He's dating multiple women and doesn't have a problem with us talking).
So, we planned on hanging out at my place for a movie and drinks as first date and she seemed...
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>>17353715
you're a rebound
>>17353715
if she skips out on you the second time then just forget it.
>>17353715
>We usually talk for 5-6 hours non stop
You're talking to her too much, lad. Too much attention always kills attraction
>told her that you like her
Did you tell her before she told you? Confessing your feelings like that is also not great.
She blew you off, but she apologised twice. She:
1) actually had something to do with family,
2) didn't want to hang out with you or
3) She is testing you
I'd recommend...
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How do I tell my girlfriend she's terrible at sex?
She has no initiative at all, and her overall skills are abysmal: keeps her lips stiff when kissing and won't open her mouth much because her jaw "will lock". When masturbating her, any fingers that go further than around the clit (i.e.: the top of labia majora) are absolutely denied, can't even ask her about fingering. And her concept of a handjob is squishing the dick like a rubber toy.
She only does three positions, missionary, sideways and on top; she will not move when on top either,...
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>>17353700
>the old lickaroo
Thanks, you dick. Now the servers are staring at me like I'm crazy, as I just burst out laughing in the kitchen.
I do have some advice, but it'll have to wait. I have some prep to do. I'll be back.
Suggest Watching Porn and act like its all new to you and be like "Aww , that could be fun" or use it to throw out questions about her technique to make it seem less out of the blue.
Or "50 shades of grey" the fuck outta her and just force new moves upon her!
>>17353717
I am a fan of the 50 shades of grey method
But maybe less aggressive
Pls help me /adv/. My best friend´s father has recently died, and i am not able to consoling people. What should i tell him?
>>17353697
Tell him how very sorry you are, that his dad was like a second father to you. But don't say that if you never met the dad, obviously. It's just fluff talk for his sake.
Also tell him you're there for him no matter what, and want to help however you can. Don't make suggestions as to what you want to do--just offer yourself up to help. He will ask you if he needs something.
Then give him space. Send him a message or call him every other day to check in and ask how he's doing...
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>>17353697
I'm very sorry for your loss. If I can help in any way, I hope you will tell me.
Then hug him and let him cry, if needed, or accept his awkward thanks and shuffle off.
don't tell him shit - just be around to chill - if you spend too much time wondering what the right thing to say is the time when he needed people to just be around will have past and he will be worse for it
Holy shit guys, i need help.
Im getting boners when hot girls in the gym bent over or do any other sexy pose. Its fucking embarrasing!
I was doing lateral rises today, and this girl with tight ass started to do a back exercise behind me, i had a mirror infront of me, and her big ass was looking at me when i was doing my exercise. I wasn't even looking at it, and i started to get a boner! I finished the set and got on the floor to do push ups so i could hide my boner.
How the fuck do i fix this??
>>17353676
Just tuck it in your waistband bruh, just make sure it doesn't peek out
>>17353676
>I finished the set and got on the floor to do push ups so i could hide my boner.
That's hilarious
How old are you? It's pretty normal if you're a teen and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. If you're in your 20s, make sure you're having enough sex
>>17353676
Own it. Accuse people of body shaming if someone points out.
![Dancing_baby[1].gif](https://i.imgur.com/s3QKVGz.gif "Dancing_baby[1].gif")
I'm about to have a kid I probably won't be able to support because I'm a piece of shit,
how I do kill myself?
>>17353663
cant you kill the kid instead?
>>17353677
no it's too late
>>17353679
never too late to abort
Happiness seems impossible. I'm 30, never been in a real relationship. In love with someone but we can't be together, been in love once before but it didn't work out. I hate a lot of people and the world depresses me. What I have going for me is a decent income and a few good friends.
Am I fucked? Have you ever felt like you'll never be happy? What can I do?
>In love with someone but we can't be together
Explain, por favor?
>>17353660
We've both been in serious relationships with people the other is close with.
>>17353670
Unless there's a strong familial connection here, why do you care what other people think, if you're in love?
What's a good excuse to explain to employers why I had long absence from employment?
What's the true reason?
>>17353610
Say that you've traveled the world or something.
>>17353610
world travel
taking care of a relative full time (They're better now, or maybe they died) etc.
I dont understand my brother, I just lock the door to masturbate and he always came and start hitting the shitty door. At the beggining I just stopped masturbating but then I just started to ignore him. The problem is that now he start to speak loud in the house about why I lock myself in my room. What I can do to solve this problem?
Brother is 21
>>17353602
How old are you?
>>17353604
>18
Move out.
If you impregnate a girl what do you do? Having the baby isn't an option, both parents absolutely cannot fucking know and you can't have an abortion in your country, except for specific cases that none apply to you?
You're an asshole.
Just grow up, tell your parents, and raise the child.
Or just punch her in the stomach until she miscarries you immature little fuck.
>>17353596
Asshole why you cunt? We both can't raise a baby, and I don't want to leave her, yet I'm an asshole fucking still? Help or get the fuck out
>>17353587
What country are you in? Is there a nearby country you could take her to to get the pregnancy terminated? If not, you can surely give the baby to some fucking nuns, assuming you live in a pope-addled shithole.
Wear condoms, dummy.
I'm sweating like a motherfucker. Especially now, if I step out a few minutes later I'm drenched. I've tried a good number of deodorant but all they do is make the smell of sweat mix with the deodorant, which is even worse. I'm not particularly obese either (around 85 kg with 180 cm). Anyone has any tips what can I do with this?
>>17353567
Always like this? Or just because it's summer and hot?
If you are prone to sweating year-round, you have some sort of gland problem. You need to visit a dermatologist to get some prescription strength deodorant.
>>17353572
Only when it's hot and/or humid, so very bad during the summer.
In colder weather it's only bad if I get on the subway/bus in warm clothing when the heat is on.
>>17353567
You're a little overweight but I don't know if that's just muscle mass or body fat. Could all just be genetics. Try wearing fast wicking fabrics like under armor and merino wool. Cotton is a no go. As far as deodorants go, try Dry Idea advance dry. Shit is odorless and it lasts two days. Really good stuff.
