Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 567. page
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>I am planning on confessing to a girl I have not seen in person for more than a year.
I have known this girl for more than 5 years. We used to meet, go out for drinks, go on bike tours regularly, before she moved a way to pursue her studies.
One year ago, I moved into a town close to her.
All this time, we never had a chance to meet in person, because we have vastly different schedules.
Recently I skyped with her for the first time in ages and I noticed I much I had missed her in my life. Our mundane talks, our biking tours...all that came back to me. Just listening to her talk, just put a huge smile on my face.
This was not the first time I had thought about my feelings for her, but never acted on it because I thought that we wouldn't go well together.
>My friends and her sister seem to think otherwise.
Although I never was 'head-over-heels in love', my feelings for her have been nagging at the back of my mind for a while. She always stood out to me.
I doubt it would be a good idea to start a relationship across cities and different schedules and universities.
For me this confession is more of a way to vent my feelings, rather than aiming for a potential relationship.
Now I am just worried that my casual confession would be impolite or make her uneasy.
>Is it acceptable to 'confess' to a girl, while not necessarily aiming for a relationship?
>'We have not met in a long time and I have really missed you...maybe we could be more than friends...whatever you say, it is just something I wanted to tell you, something i don't want to regret no having told you' (not these words, but along these lines)
Please share your experiences and opinions.
Thanks.
>>17224247
I suppose it would be fine, so long as you don't make it cringy, I guess.
Just.. make sure it's the same person. A lot can happen in 5 years.
>>17224254
Thanks for the input.
The last time we met was about a year ago (not 5).
I planned to just go out to dinner with her, after spending some time with her. And when the time is good, just casually tell her.
>The last thing i want is to seem needy.
>Whatever she says, I just want to have said it - regret is worse than telling her
What worries me, is whether it is acceptable to 'casually tell somebody that you like them'.
Vent your feelings to a neutral third party, or write a letter and burn it. This isn't appropriate conversation. If you want a relationship you go about it by flirting with her and building interest until you get what you want. If you don't want a relationship you don't say a word of it. The ONLY time it's appropriate to confess like this is when you're cutting her out of your life to move on.
It will make her uneasy and damage your friendship. Unless she happens to already be interested in you as well secretly, in which case she'll want a relationship and be upset at you when you decline which will then damage your friendship.
How do I stop wasting my life on 4chan? It literally consumes all my free time. I've tried to do without it before but I get anxiety about all the cool stuff I could be missing out on.
Replace 4chan with other activities. Get some new hobbies that involve spending time outside.
Maybe get a bicycle, or join a boxing gym, or start golfing.
>>17224238
>all the cool stuff
Get a job, a job that makes you interact with people
Why did I have to be born as Butters?
You weren't born that way. You are just busy indoctrinating yourself that you are, instead of being observant, practicing not to be, and being proud of what you achieved.
>>17224232
>be proud of what you achieved
Which is nothing. Go take your hippie liberal 'everything is ok' advice and peg your uncle with it you flaming faggot.
OP change yourself, struggle, let your rage and anger fuel you to greatness. Start by getting off 4chin, get a gym membership, and go outside 5 times a week. School/work doesn't count.
>>17224215
At least you weren't born as... oh no wait even Jimmy isn't as bad as Butters. Oh or Craig, that guy is a real retard too.
My gf dildo is bigger and thicker than me, she makes herself cum super hard with it, im only 6 inches hard and about 4.5 thick, not sure on girth but not that fat, also not a pencil
How can i make her appreciate my cock and use my tool more efficiently, i am very capable of making her cum by eating her out and face fucking her, throwing her around, being very agressive for the most part, shes a good girl, she loves it when i grab her by the back of the head and pull her to suck my cock while i relax on the couch, so, to say the least, the intimacy is definetely there, and i am very sexual, and she is very receptive to my manhandling, my problem is thst she makes hesrelf cum really hard with her dildo, i can tell its better for her than my cock, so someone please help me out, how can i use my tool more effectively, what are some good ways i can tease her with my cock, someway for me to fill her up better, i feel pathetic because its like im very good in bed, i just dont have a huge cock, she fucks herself with it and goes like all the way in and fucks herself hard until she cums, i cantell shes faking it with me after seeing her cum on the dildo, please someone just tell me you relate, give me some advice, i should mention ne and this girl are brand new, weve only had sex 4 times, and its been gettin better eachtime
My ex before this girl was a total ho, i used to fuck her 4 times a week, and i had this same issue, my talents go really far, but when it comes down to it my girth is lacking and i feel hopeless, but with my ex i was super kinky and into bdsm with her, so i made her cum alot, thats what im hoping for, someone in a similar situation to talk to
Thanks
>>17224183
Lol. You're too small for your girl. It's literally only a matter of time before she seeks some BBC on the side.
Your best bet is to find a girl with a smaller vagina. If you're insecure because a piece of plastic is cucking you, you're going to be on suicide watch when (not if) she cheats on you with a BBC Mandingo Warrior.
Or you could wait for the cucks, nu-males, and women to chime in and tell you 'don't worry about it' or 'just bee urself lul' and have a miserable life.
Your call bub.
>>17224183
Sometimes I wonder, if the shitposting on 4chan has created self-perpetuating bait threads. No human could be that sad and repeatedly post the same type of thread over and over again.
don't worry about it just bee urself lul
I need some advice on something that's really making me uncomfortable.
So, a friend and I hang out constantly at his place. He's a stay at home dad with a newborn baby, and he gets pretty bored and calls me over. I work night shifts and have nothing to do so I just go over. It's cool chilling at his place, but the problem is his 12 year old daughter. She's too flirty around me, and very touchy when my friend is out on the room doing something else or checking on the baby. Two weeks ago he ran out for a bit to run some errand, and his daughter jumped on me and sat on my lap. I gently pushed her off and explained to her that what she was doing was not okay and was really inappropriate and that it made me uncomfortable. At 12 I would've thought she'd understand, but I was wrong, she kept doing shit like this.
I talked to my friend about this and he gave her a talk, and that pretty much settled it. Now the problem is that she sent me a friend request and a chat request on facebook. I blocked her. Now I just try to avoid going over as much as possible, it's just so awkward and uncomfortable. But this is like the only friend I still have contact with and I don't want to fuck it up.
I would just keep him updated cause he is aware of the situation so you shouldn't have anything to worry about. You can even say it's uncomfortable for you but obviously don't want to insult his daughter so you are looking for him to help you out. Also, I imagine this is also uncomfortable and embarrassing for him to so don't feel like it's just you.
Sorry you are in this weird situation.
>>17224163
ha
I feel bad for guys who eventually have to go through this. Hopefully she wont resort to blackmail or anything.
Try to explain what could happen to you if she doesnt stop. Hopefully she wont use that against you.
>>17224205
Hopefully. This shit is kinda scary.
the 3 yr ex shitposter is back with anther update
>last night tells me shes done
>tell the boyfriend shes been fucking me the whole time they have been dating
>he wants to fight me and believes her
>fuck this bitch, im done
>texts me this morning "hey..."
>reply hours later and we start talking
>she says he believed me and "you ruined everything"
im feeling pretty good about myself now. i can only hope she comes crawling back to me.
at least he knows shes a slut and dumped her like she dumped me
Dude don't you have friends you can tell this shit?
Lmao this isn't even asking for advice
>>17224141
i have no friends what so ever
im just asking for peoples opinions as i dont have anyone i can tell this shit to irl
>>17224146
Dude why won't you try to be happy?
Even if you ex and her bf break up they'll get new relationships and move on and be happy, you will stuck where you are.
Move on or die never living life past where you are now
I am in a relationship with a girl I genuinely love. Yet I can't stop coveting other women.
It is especially difficult when there are women that express interest in me. There's part of me that somehow can completely turn off most moral bearings.
When I was younger, I lacked the confidence and skillset to charm women, but somehow I do now, being in my late twenties.
It gets bad sometimes, as I fantasize about other women.
I've never done anything. Sometimes, I make lame jokes to my girlfriend about oral sex and lately she's been telling me that if I have that need, that I should satisfy it elsewhere. At first, I didn't give it any second thought. Lately, she's been repeating it more and more.
It's almost as if she realizes this. Her libido is very low and I don't mind, oddly.
I love her and cheating is out of the question. It's making me feel incredibly conflicted, trying to deny something I simply am.
I realize this makes me another human male, like any other. Sometimes, I'm not so sure, as I can't help but absolutely wanting to glamouring the pants off of an attractive women.
How do other people cope with this? Are my urges larger than anyone else's?
>>17224078
You're completely normal and if your girl refuses to give you oral sex (???), then you should simply talk about other women with her. Especially if she doesn't give you something, it shouldn't hurt her too much since it's not like she's just too bad at it or something.
And if you don't cheat and cheating is out of the question, then you're not able to turn off moral bearings. You have no idea how bad that gets.
I'm somewhat similar. I've tried a lot of things to get my gf into oral and she isn't a real fan (cunnilingus not felatio). Every time I talk to her about it I get no where and it ends up at "I just don't like it," and it kills me a little each time hearing it.
So I cheated and feelprettybad desu but I'll probably keep doing it until she finds out and I kill myself :^)
>>17224107
Thanks for the response. It's not that I'm frustrated about not getting any blowjobs or whoopee from her.
The silly thing is I'm not all that crazy about receiving. I rally like giving oral, but that's not up her alley (pun intended) either.
It's that I more than often find myself being enticed and entranced by a woman I might meet. To the point where I want to be with her, intimately.
Casual blowjobs, get on, get in get off type deals do not interest me.
An old school friend who turned into a gorgeous woman has expressed interested and has been flirting with me and that made me feel the heat rising from my body. I've been avoiding ever since and that makes me feel extra guilty.
Hello /adv/. When my son was 2 his bitch mother (shared opinion) took him half-way across the US and got a restraining order saying that I have to stay 500ft away from her at all times. It was only approved because I had a few assault charges on me when I was 17 for some stupid shit and the police didn't want to take the chance she was telling the truth and that I was beating on her. I wasn't. She recently passed away and my son (16 now) and I have been living together since. From what I understand, he never really made any friends and he was basically a hermit who never left his room from age 10-15. That's why he's fat. He can barely socialize with anyone but me and he can't step outside of our apartment without having these huge fucking panic spikes. I don't want him to be the tendies guy, I want him to live a normal life. I enrolled him at a local high-school and got him a SIN but he was too late for driving lessons this year which he felt really bad about because he wanted to learn to drive so he didn't have to take the bus and be afraid of being mugged/stabbed. DESU he is a pretty easy target because he's weak as shit. He's fat and emaciated all at the same time and he couldn't talk his way out of these situations because he's so fucking socially inept. I know he knows these fears are irrational and I really want to help him be a normal, functioning person. Please help me /adv/, you're my only hope.
Pic unrelated
>>17224063
Go to the gym together. Should make him healthier and possibly more social interaction.
>>17224473
Seconding this. Well, shared activity, at least, with chance of social interaction.
Ya, get him to work out also tell or teach him a few ways to talk to people and convince him to not be shy or something lol gl,hope he'll have a nice life.
How do I stop feeling so bad about a job I quit 3 goddamn years ago?
It sounds pathetic (and it is) but to this day I still have intense anxiety and panic attacks about a job I had for a week as a waiter. The guy I worked for was a prick who would always yell at me and the other staff and even his wife when she was over (several times, all in front of customers when I'm serving them which made things incredibly awkward). I work fucking hard and I'm great at my job but I felt this guy was really disrespectful to me.
When I was dealing with customers he'd keep ringing the bell incessantly until I came to pick up the food. When I was busting my ass working I'd have to step past him as he was playing with his daughter. One time I was there there was a plumbing issue in the kitchen. Me and the other guy working there just had to pile up the plates on the station outside while he did nothing to help us and just ended up having a smoking break for half an hour.
I think the big reason I feel so anxious about it is because when I quit he asked me desperately to stay and work in the weekend (I quit on a Thursday or Friday) but at that point I felt I couldn't turn back and I told him several times I wouldn't. He must have asked me 3 or 4 times but I just told him I couldn't. He was just a bastard to me and I didn't want to continue.
I'm thinking about doing some therapy for this, I think I have some issues with standing up for myself and being a man. I'm such a fucking pussy sometimes.
How can I move past this?
Cheeky bump
Anybody?
one last one
I just want to lay down and die. I have no friends, nobody to care about me. I'm about to become homeless. I don't know what's stopping me from changing my life, but I keep being miserable.
Anybody have an answer to this?
if ur at emergency point with homelessness u could contact a parent or relative to stay with them or you could start camming on chaturbate (they accept all genders) to earn money, some popular models make £50k a month on those sites
>>17224033
This is going to sound ridiculous, but I think you should try looking at the bright side of things. Life is tough, it always will be, but it's never permanent. It'll blow over, unless you simply decide to give up on yourself!
So.. what would a bright side be? Personally, I've always wanted to travel around, living out of a backpack, but I've been too afraid of leaving the comfort of my home. If I were on the brink of becoming homeless, then what would I have to lose? I'm already where I would otherwise end up, so I might as well pack a bag, take whatever money I had left, and go out to explore. I'd have to beg on the streets, I might even have to steal, but I'd already have hit rock bottom, so maybe that wouldn't be so bad, as long as I got to travel, at least for a little while.
Isn't there something you've always wanted to do, but been too afraid to?
>>17224087
I will become homeless in a month or two. I have no money right now. I could get a job to save some money to go travel, but I don't know why I'm not doing it. My brain keeps me in place. I know I'll be miserable without money, probably have to beg, but I hate myself so I don't care. I keep procrastinating instead of getting a job.
How would you react if you ex told you she still loved you after a long time? Need preferred male opinions on this.
>we go out for 2 months
>i take his virginity
>in the first 2 weeks he really likes me and worships my looks etc, is a genuinely nice and sweet dorky guy, not a fuckboy/douchebag
>suddenly makes it clear hes less fond of me
>i ask him if he wants to end it
>hes like yeah. sorry
>apparently he broke up with me because i was rude and teased him about being slim, bad vision and was clingy even though i dont remember it this way
>been in love with him for 2 years
>we met up once a year ago and i told him i was sincerely sorry about my behaviour. he said it was okay and asked to meet up again but never replied when i said i wanted to
thats really all there is to it. I'm thinking about telling him. A few questions for y'all:
Would you still wanna be friends?
Would you be sympathetic/understanding?
Does a girl have more significance if she took your virginity?
How would you respond?
Thanks.
A girl who popped my cherry also cheated on me later so it's hard to relate.
He was the one who wanted to end this right? I am too proud to try something again in such case, even if I were begged to, but I'm a guy and I'm stubborn. Imagine that he probably boosted his confidence once he lost his virginity and wanted to level up, get fuck around and get some prettier girl. Maybe he failed at this job and comes back with his tail down.
You really want to be plan B and emergency goods he takes because found nothing better?
>>17224027
> Would you still wanna be friends?
Normally I would, but the guy didn't reply, even though he said he wanted to meet up. He lied to you and let you down.
> Would you be sympathetic/understanding?
I'm always understanding, but that doesn't mean that I'm forgiving.
> Does a girl have more significance if she took your virginity?
It depends on the situation. I don't personally care, but that's likely because so many things went wrong between us.
> How would you respond?
I'd simply let it go. Even if you do care about him, it might not be worth the hurt you'll be going through. - It's fully up to you, how you respond.
If you have any other questions, don't hesitate to ask. I'll hang around for a while, in case you need it.
>>17224049
woah there . a girl who is more attractive than me??? your wit, sir, is legendary!
im just joshin ya but i did won prom queen. im very much out of his league. not to sound up myself or anything. i appreciate ur honesty though dude.
Oh god please help
About two weeks ago, I had both smoked and consumed marijuana. It was fun at first, but it got really bad really quickly. My heart started pumping really fast and the worst feeling came over me. I felt like I was dying. I called one of my family members and I had one of the worst panic attacks of my life. I was screaming in agony and they thought I was dying too. Every time my heart began to race and I began to panic a little bit, this loud buzzing/ringing sound started in my ears which made me freak out even more. Eventually, it calmed down, but there was this weird feeling in my body like it was tingling or something. I couldn't sit down for more than a minute before that horrible feeling came back and I jolted up. The only relief I had was pacing, riding in the car, going outside, or standing in the shower. Whenever I tried to lay down and sleep, that feeling got extremely intense; especially when I was getting close to actually falling asleep so I naturally jolted back up and started controlling my breathing and jumped in the shower to stop this feeling. This lasted about 30 hours before I finally slept. Then, the next day, it continued but not as intensely. I was able to be on my computer if it was outside, so it wasn't total hell. I was eventually able to sleep that night, and the next day it had mostly gone away and I felt ok.
But now, 2-3 weeks later, I have the same feeling happening again, just not to the same horrible degree. I woke up this morning to the same jolting feeling and had to calm myself down and jump in the shower and it happened a second time when I tried to take a nap. There's this constant pressure in my chest, and if I think about it too much it starts to act up again.
I have used other drugs in the past, so here's my drug use history: Alcohol for the past 3 years. I used to drink once a week for a few months, then I stopped and only drank every month and now only every few months. Tobacco off and on quitting
Cont.
>>17223995
OP
Then I started marijuana but not for long. Maybe only 3 weeks until that happened. Within those 3 weeks, I had also taken 1 hit (150 micrograms) of pure LSD. If I remember correctly, I had smoked once after with no horrible effect, but the next time I had an edible and smoked it had that effect. Oh the edible had about .3 of a gram and I smoked maybe .05 of a gram. I had never taken an edible before.
The past 3 days, I had been using chewing tobacco, and then the fucked up feeling happened again today, so I'm never using it again.
My mental illness/physical disorder history:
During early childhood I had panic attacks
I probably have schizophrenia
If not schizo then bipolarism
I had depression stemmed from anxiety
Childhood trauma so maybe ptsd
social anxiety but thats improving a lot
Hip injury from working/going to gym/martial arts
Knee injury from lifting (bursitis)
I've had tendonitis in my hands
I was in an electrical explosion but only mild burns on my arms
I can't think of anything else, but what do I do and what could be wrong with me? I'm about to travel to several countries and don't want this to happen in those places.
>>17223995
Are you sure that was actual bud and not spice (synthetic)
17224028▶
I would say it's unlikely since this dealer had quite the reputation around here. How would I be able to tell if it was synthetic? It looked exactly like bud too.
Am I going bald? No one believes me and they say it's just the way my hair is but I'm convinced I am and I'm scared to get my hair cut because of it
>>17223987
It's possible, but I don't think so.
It would be an improvement.
People I've asked said im just being paranoid. I have to like move my hair to get that PIC
Yay, yet more of this annoying things!
So there's this girl I like (no shit), and I managed to get her number. Issues are: She's leaving the country, don't know when; and the three conversations I've had with her texting have gotten exponentially shorter, like how did I fuck this up so badly kinda short.
I do want to be with her, but I also want to keep being her friend and know how she does when she leaves. So yeah...
Also according to my wonderfull facebook stalking skills her birthday was tomorrow (which I managed to forget!), so any help would be appreciated.
Pic unrelated, I just saw a beautiful dawn today and felt inspired.
Move one you have like 35% with her and you're already mildly irrevelant after speaking less infrequently. Don't you know humans have short attention spans?
>>17223948
*move on
>>17223938
Well, we have no way of knowing what transpired in your texts.
Also, dismiss this "I want to be with her" stuff. She's leaving the country. Even if you two were together, she's going to fuck other dudes.
Admission to a long term relationship is how she gets you to keep giving her attention when there are no dudes around to fuck.
So now that we've put that aside, why do you even want to be her friend? Seriously, think about it. She doesn't even care enough to text you properly. Clearly you don't have that much in common. She's not going to tell you to go away because she likes the attention.
Just drop her and move on to someone who matters - unless she starts offering you spontaneous sex before she leaves.
Nursing relationships thread.
All nurses invited, tell us about you nursing stories and toxic nursing issues.
Me:
>bipolar girl with rape trauma and abortion
>her mother has cancer
>girl spent some time in mental clinic
>her father is cheating on her mother
>she has panic attacks and bipolar changes
>me with her
>braking up many times but I always come back because of pity, care and fear that she might just kill herself
>she even sometimes blackmails me about that
Finally I discovered that she also had a time to cheat on me despite of it all, so I left her for good I hope.
Even now I still care and pity her which make me feel like a cuck. I just want her to get things straight and be finally happy, but I also want to break free. Holy shit.
Don't tell me I'm the only guy in here.
Are you a psych nurse, anon?
>>17223936
>braking up many times but I always come back because of pity, care and fear that she might just kill herself
>braking up
Clearly they didn't teach you proper spelling or grammar in nursing school. It's sad that I'm dependent on the likes of you to keep me alive.
