Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 472. page
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Unemployed at 26 no health insurance and my hands and fingers are tingling with my stomach burning and pinching all day
Pretty sure this could be gastric cancer due to eating processed and salty foods
Anyways I feel like shit since my parents have been good to me and I couldn't do anything nice for them in the end. How can I shake these mind crushing thoughts?
Drink water and eat real food go to a walk in
>>17255158
apply for welfare
> couldnt do anything nice for them in the end
M8 you about to kill them or something? You still got youre entire life ahead of you and your parents can prob last at least 25 years so just fix your health and start making small plays
I'm in a polyamory relationship with my gf of 3yrs. She has been dating another girl for a year and I am cool with her too (Lesbian, so no chance). Pic related...
However, even before we decided to become poly, we set some rules for each other. No more than one more person per and don't talk about the intimate times. Of course, me being male, my success rate of finding someone else has been pretty much unsuccessful.(Open relationship status seems to make girls think he's cheating or just looking for threesomes) Any way, my gf's gf is coming to visit in august and recently she has been describing their intimate times to me more and more. I have asked her time and time again to stop because Jealousy and general sexual frustration. The last thing I asked her was "What am I supposed to feel when she tells me these things?" and she got upset. Am I in the wrong? Is there something I'm supposed to feel that I haven't understood yet? What should I do oh mighty users of /adv/
>>17255104
It sounds like a poly relationship isn't for you.
Thats really just it.
>>17255104
Real talk now mate. It's only an "open relationship" if both of you have other partners. You've managed to land yourself in a position where you're getting cucked - by another woman - in such a way that if you complain about it, your mrs (I use that term in it's loosest sense) can spin it like you're the one who's in the wrong and if you push it too far she'll kick you out and replace you with her femme-bull.
I'm 19.
I want to make games. Something in Unreal Engine, Unity, GameMaker, or my own engine.
I also understand that knowing how to code makes game development easier.
Well, not necessarily easier, but it's definitely worth it to know computer languages such as C.C++.C#, etc., so I can control the in's and out's of my game.
So, I want to learn how to programming/coding. I know nothing about it.
Where do I start?
How hard does it get?
What language is the easiest/hardest?
How long will it take me to know a good amount of a language?
Any other tips and sites provided would be much appreciated, thank you.
>>17255098
Start by learning C, then get SDL. There's tutorials and shit for free, google is your friend. Branch out after that, learning other languages once you've learned the first one will be easier. It's (mostly) all the same concepts, just tailored to different tasks. First language will probably take 2-6 months to really master, but you can start making stuff long before that.
>How hard does it get?
No upper limit, DESU. Most of it comes from attempting ambitious complex shit rather than intrinsic difficulty in programming. Be especially wary of getting obsessed with writing "clever" code that runs slightly faster but is impossible to make sense of when you read it a week later. They say you shouldn't write code that's as smart as you can be, because you'll need to be smarter to fix it when it breaks.
>>17255098
>mfw just right when I was about to beging learning to code at Codecademy my laptop struck by lightning
>>17255133
I'm super extremely dumb at math and programming codes looks exactly like them. Should I relearn math? Until what subject of math I should learn to enchance my logic enough to learn programming?
Thank you for answering this question asked by a worthless person.
>>17255143
OP here. You think Codecademy could be worth my time?
I want to take the matters into one’s own hands and change my broing lfiestyle (work - home and repeat). I feel bored, tired every fucking day. Time to change it. Post your life hacks to improve lifestyle (to be more organized, to feel better, more energized etc). Maybe some apps on Android? Post every idea!
Just be youCOFFEEr self
>>17255086
Will coffee help make OP's life more interesting
>>17255415
I am drinking some right now and I am interesting. I'm a loser but that's still interesting.
hi guys and girls, i have a few problems i hope you can helb me with. a bit of back story, im p much a massive loser but ive started going to social events with that 'meetup' website in the past few months, meeting new people and getting out etc. which is good, however theres a few issues you might be able to give me some ideas for
1. dance moves? oftentimes these things end up in a club or somewhere where there is dancing for whatever reason, standard club gyrating and hand waving stuff. i dont really have any special moves apart from making the girl twirl, so you guys know any good ones? im aiming for fairly tasteful stuff that is still sexual (as any dancing is) but nothing particularly gropey or aggressive (i have no problem talking to and making contact with girls, i just dont feel being so unsubtle is appropriate)
2. theres a girl i like in the group but im concerned that making a move on her will bomb said group. im not worried about getting rejected as im used to it now, but i dont really want to cause a rift in the group, get a rep as 'that guy', make her not want to come anymore or stop getting invited because i rocked the boat. so basically, is it a good idea to ask girls in a friendship group out, or should you go for peripheral people, like friends of said girls or randoms or whatever?
>>17255055
1. Pretend you're a wet fish. It's still sexual and not "gropey" since fish don't have hands. Make sure you're wet, I can't stress that enough. I once banged a girl with this magic technique.
2. Just go to her and randomly ask her out. If she rejects you you're a loser and you must leave the group. It's just how human tribes are supposed to work.
>>17255084
could you expand on that please?
problem is i dont want to get kicked out the group because i need it to meet more people
>>17255103
Just take her aside and ask her out out of the blue without knowing each other first. Make sure to do it anxiously and not maintaining eye contact. If she rejects you, you're automatically banished from the group. You must feel defeated and go to r9k and complain about the unfairness of life.
I am concerned about my sister. She responded to someone who said they didn't have any respect for martyrs with this rant.
My sister took me to my first concert, Rage Against the Machine, in 1997. I was 11. She showed me George Carlin and Bill Hicks.
Religion was never a big thing in our house. Our parents taught us to question authority, not blindly believe in any ideology, and that organized religion had a tendency towards corruption over time.
This has really only started in the last year or two. I am concerned, as my sister has three young children. She's pulled them out of school and is teaching them this. I am concerned for them. What should I do? Should I even do anything?
Make sure she's not insane. How insane is your sister, bro?
>>17255018
She never used to be, but now I wonder. Sadly, I live a few states away from her now.
>>17255032
You must go back
Hey, I really need help staying awake even when I'm so sleepy my body is falling over.
But... but... but... why?
>>17254979
that's life, I do what I must until death comes.
>>17254984
Why don't you sleep properly, you fucking sack of shit?
Im so depressed and full of anxiety i cant even eat. I just end up throwing up.
What can i do?
Why the anxiety? You can't pay rent, your dog is about to die? Your girl is cheating on you? Please tell me right now you piece of shit.
>>17254980
My job.
>>17254986
get a new job
Has ANYONE been helped by Tony Robbins' stuff?
No. The self help industry is a bunch of pseudo-philosophy and pop psychology that usually offers nothing of value to people who really need help. See a professional rather than wasting time/money going to these kinds of seminars.
Jack Black
>>17254997
I'm not necessarily asking about the seminars. You can easily watch his shit on Youtube or read his articles.
Hello /adv/, this is my first post here and I need help. Please don't make fun of me, the last days have been the worst in my life and I self-loathe myself enough already.
I am completely serious about anything in this post.
To understand my problem, I have to talk a little bit about myself. I'm 18 years old and frequently visit the boards /r9k/ and /u/. Until a few days ago, I was quite content with
my life. It makes me really happy seeing cute 2d lesbians, and I wish I could be one too. I'm not a tranny (I think they look disgusting), so my only hope in that regard was to die and turn into a cute lesbian in the afterlife. I also share most of the political and social views of /r9k/, I would never date a girl who has lost her virginity (at this point I don't give a fuck about real women at all), fucking normies reeee, etc. So far so good.
I have a few friends (all male of course), and even though I consider myself straight for the most point (I like to fap to traps), I've tried numerous times in my life to initiate sexual contact with some of them. When I was 12 or 13, me and friend A fapped next to each other. I don't consider that actual sexual contact.
So last friday my best friend B invited me over to his house for a sleepover (we have these a lot, though usually at my house, his parents weren't at home this time). We played LoL together and did the drinking game, at the end we both were pretty drunk, it wasn't too bad. During that time I already hugged him several times, he didn't mind. When we went to sleep we shared the full-size bed of his sister, and I went pretty homo at him soon. Long story short, I rubbed and sucked his dick, and he rubbed mine for a short time. After he passed out again (he was more drunk than me I think) I started to feel guilt and shame on an incredible level. The main reasons for this: ...cont.
>>17254891
-I sucked my best friend's dick. I see this guy everyday, and I can't even look into his eyes anymore. Our year long friendship has been ruined forever by me. He doesn't seem phased by it at all and doesn't bring it up either, but I just know it will never be the same. He may be cheerful as usual, but I can't be on an equal level with him anymore now that I fucking sucked his dick and he only rubbed mine. I'm fucking ashamed, I even revealed disgusting fantasies to him like me sucking his dick while he played LoL (of course he declined, who in their right mind would do something like that? What the fuck is my problem jesus christ the internet ruined me for good.)
-I didn't really enjoy it. Sure, I was pretty fucking excited when I touched his dick, but in the end it ruined my life. I also think that my friend is pretty ugly and I only like traps. I think the reason why I did it is because if I can't get into a cute girlxgirl relationship I go for the next best thing. Or something like that.
-I pretty muched forced him. All the time he just went along with whatever I did. He didn't really resist, but he also didn't care about anything in that moment. I feel fucking shitty for when I touched his dick when he passed out for a short time. I'm fucking disgusting.
-I had sexual contact, which makes me a non virgin in my opinion. I feel like I don't belong on /r9k/ or wizardchan anymore, and it makes me feel like I have nowhere else to go. I used to laugh about stacies being total whores, now I'm one of them and I just want to die. No one on this planet can relate to what I'm going through. I don't want anyone, 3D or 2D, to bother about a straight guy that sucked dick.
cont...
>>17254895
Yuri, and moe in general, makes me feel like human garbage. Everytime I see a picture I would normally consider cute, I have to think of what I did that night, and that I'm a fucking worthless faggot that doesn't deserve looking at this stuff. I also feel like even if I would die that god wouldn't turn me into a cute lesbian anymore (I'm completely fucked in the head, yes.).
-I don't think there is any kind of solution to my problem. The damage is done, I can't un-suck my best friend's dick, I can't become a virgin again. My carefree happy days as a guy who enjoys anime a lot are gone forever and I will never get them back.
My parents know that something is wrong with me, I'm almost constantly crying like an autistic little piece of shit, but I can't tell them what happened. And when I say to them that they can't help me, I see the sadness in their eyes. Tomorrow I'm going to an event where you can talk to a psychologist for an hour for free and I'm gonna vent about everything there as well.
Pic related is what used to be one of my favorite pictures. When I look at it now I only feel regret, shame and the desire to end it all. Please help me.
Lol fag
I have 2 bosses one likes me and the other dislikes me. The one that dislikes me finds little things to take "revenge" and shit like that but never says anything about disliking me. I also dislike her; her personality is obnoxious, she is loud and needs to constantly reaffirm herself and brags about stuff, she is insecure and tries too hard to seem strong.
"The loudest person in the room is always the weakest" applies very well. I have a particular hate for this kind of personality.
The reason i have this job is because when i was home all day i got sucked in my own sadness and suicidal thoughts; it was good at first but then the whole animosity began and now it sucks. This is making my mind go to places again.
Should i quit and wait for college or endure?
People rarely like their bosses, stop being a whiny bitch
>>17254874
It's not about that.
I'm fucked in the head right now and i have to choose between a double edge sword. I want to know from an outsider's perspective which one sounds better.
ENDURE
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Need help figuring out what I want and if I'm being unreasonable or not.
Short story:
-with wife for 6 years, married for 1
-rocky relationship: few shared interests, constant fights about domestic responsibilities, resentment over one thinking the other contributes less to the relationship
- still a really good team if we try to be, but it has been getting harder
- she supported me through grad school, so there is a feeling of "owing" her
- she has been approaching me over the last few months saying that we need to fix things or accept that it won't work, I was in denial, didn't want to consider divorce despite my misgivings about us
Within the last month:
- connected with long-time friend who is, in terms of interests and personality, nearly a twin
- unexpectedly developed feelings for each other, fell in love
- saw my marriage as rotten, was planning to end it but started to get cold feet when I saw how painful the idea of it was to my wife, my family (but no kids yet)
- her husband found her texts, freaked out, but he said he wanted to work it out
- was determined to tell my wife it was over, but chickened out because I went to family for advice and they told me I had to fix my marriage, and I was scared of leaving my marriage if she was going to stay in hers (I know, I should leave a bad marriage regardless)
Now:
- agonizing about not choosing my friend
- still talk to her everyday, she's bitter I didn't pick her, but we still love each other
- convinced I should do counseling with my wife to end it "peacefully"
- friend thinks I'm lying to myself and that the option I've chosen above is really choosing to try to fix my marriage
- agonize about what I should do hourly, love my friend more than I've ever loved anyone, but hate the idea of hurting my wife more, because I still care about her
What the fuck? I either, a) know what I want but I'm not pulling the trigger, or b) I can't figure myself out, or c) no idea.
In essence, I want to choose her, so what's stopping me?
You are in a bad marriage with someone you don't love. Regardless of what's going on with your friend, you will ruin your life (and your wife's life, and any future children you might have) if you keep this going. You need to end it. You already know that.
>>17254956
So how do I accept that and say it? How do I commit to that path?
Hey.
I am suffering from depression, it kicked in about 3 weeks ago when my only friend started ignoring me for no reason. Ive talked to him about it and he says it just happened but he dtill considers me his friend.
My mother was mentally abusing me until i moved out and I had severe depression while living with her, having the support of a friend helped greatly.
Now I have no friends, no family and when I try talking to my friend he just says "Why do you have to be so boring?" He completely ignored the fact that I have depression and is hanging out with the people he "hated" before.
I dont know what to do and I usually play games when I feel bad, I want to give up on getting him back but he was a great friend who has helped me through a lot.
If possible please keep the thread alive, I am currently on my phone with 1% battery but I am 10 minutes away from home.
How did your friend help you?
>>17255031
He often came to my house and talked with my mom since she wouldnt listen to me. Sometimes when things got out of hand he helped me get out of the house.
So last night my downstairs neighbor called the cops on us citing us smoking weed. The Cops came and we didn't let them in but they asked a few questions outside (in a bored manner, like why the fuck am I here) then left. They obviously didn't see or smell anything. Apparently this isn't the first time they have been called but it's the first time the police confronted us.
Now a bit of background. We're 9 months into our lease in a 1 year lease. They are in maybe the 2nd month of theirs. A couple weeks back the guy came to our door saying a "cigarette butt: fell through the cracks and hit their daughter on the head. I answered the door and apologized and said it wouldn't happen again. The roommate of mine who does smoke offered to sweep any cigarette butt that may have fallen through off their porch the next day then gave him his number just in case they had any other concerns. Then 2 weeks later or so they call the police on us, without calling us or voicing their concerns to us.
Now we do in fact smoke pot outside, but we are on the top floor and we don't make loud rackets or bother anyone. We now keep the porch clean and we smoke bowls and no joints. We decided to start smoking in the bathroom instead of going outside.
Now they apparently leave their door open and are hell bent on catching us. We never complain when they are being loud or their kids are loud but they don't appear to want to offer the same courtesy to us with us smoking a little weed.
What can we further do about the situation? The cops aren't going to keep coming out here for a weed smell and we are not in any way trafficking as we don't have people coming and going.
It may be past us just talking since they are so quick to call the cops. What do?
Make a "dick" or "sploof"
>get plastic bottle
>get dryer sheets
>put 4 large holes in the bottom of the bottle
>stuff said bottle with dryer sheets
>exhale marjuana smoke thru said bottle
Much like my mother when I was in high school, they wont suspect a thing.
>>17254890
Hey that's cool. Why is it called a dick?
>>17254835
as the other anon said, a sploof is a good option. another option is to say fuck them, bad neighbors are part of life. the cops can't legally do anything unless you open the door and they see a bong or something.
I have a question about the age old advice of he yourself
How do you know who you are ?
If it's the things you like , the what if the things you like are negative ? (Ie being negative all the time )
>>17254790
>How to be yourself
The real trick is in understanding that you first have to BUILD yourself. We're born with half a psyche at best. Freud called it the id, while Jung called it the shadow, but whole Jung was less moralistic about things, they referred to the same concept: the self as the sum of one's impulses, the "lizard brain".
Over top of this, the theory goes, we are to build the free-willed individual who, while subject to these impulses, is not a slave to them: Freud's ego, Jung's persona. Only once you've fleshed one of these out can the concept of "being yourself" really apply.
The main problem with the way we present "be yourself" as advice in this day and age is that we present it to kids too young: before the self has fully developed, and thus before they can really understand the advice. Some take it to mean "never change", but the concept of building a self is all ABOUT change, and so they come to reject selfcraft as inauthentic. Others take it to mean "never alter your behavior for the sake of others", but this robs them of the ability to make accommodations for others in their lives: something we all need to do.
But I digress. The point is that before you can be yourself, you must build something to be.
>>17254816
What should I build to be ?
>>17254820
A firetruck maintenance. It's best job out there for depress
