Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2258. page
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Is smoking as addictive as people make it out to be? I've been smoking when I feel like it for three or four months now and I've never had a feeling of addiction, it doesn't bother me to go a day or a week without a smoke
It isn't as addictive as people make out, people are just weak willed as fuck. I have smoked for a long period of time, whenever I feel like stopping I just stop. Sometimes I get a headache the day after I stop but that doesn't make me want to grab a pack. Currently I've not smoked for a week.
>>16436409
It's probably a lot worse when you use it as a crutch to deal with stress.
>>16436561
Yeah but the catch is that people can fall into that without realizing and you know just some regular stress blows up and suddenly you're addicted.
Yeah it's pretty addictive, people can actually go through withdrawals and while it surely can be avoided for a while it can sneak up on you.
I've been rejected a lot in my past. I've matured a lot more now though, I'm able to socialize well and I'm better than average looking. However now that the tables have turned, I keep getting thoughts of getting revenge against all the people who wronged me. I want to beat the shit out of a lot of people and then when it comes to women, I feel the need to just rub it in their face because they were such bitches to me in the past for no reason..
I guess all I can say is, how do I just let go of the past? I'm filled constantly with thoughts of just making those people who made me feel like shit in the past, now feel like shit, but I know this is eating me alive a bit and making me into a bitter person. How can I just let go of the past?
It's just one of the marks of maturity to stop obsessing over showing people how fucking wrong they were/are. It's no surprise you have such a drive. It's the hallmark of your entire childhood that you were constantly called out for making mistakes. Home, school, wherever. Childhood is about learning and you can't learn from mistakes unless they're called out.
Except you're not a child anymore, nor are all of those people from your past. You aren't their father anyway. Just because you endured decades of "mistakes being called out...
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>>16436369
thanks, you hit the nail on the head. I guess I'm just still bitter at what they did. It's hard to get over because I have this problem still where I value people more than myself.
>>16436536
what did they do?
If I want to break up with my gf, do I go to her place and chill and break up when I leave, or do I go there and do it immediately?
It's best to meet on neutral semi-public grounds. What I mean by the latter is that you're around other people, but with sufficient privacy to speak quietly. An example would be a bench a little bit off the walking path at a park.
You make plans to meet there and do it immediately. Then leave.
>go there
>tell her why
>discuss if you or her need to
>don't be a dick about it, just explain what needs to be explained
>leave
>>16436313
>do I go to her place and chill and break up when I leave
Do you not understand how fucked up that is?
>Girl I didn't know starts talking to me every day
>Decide to ask her out, she says she's busy but would love to.
>Says she wants time for herself after coming out of long relationship
>Wait a month and ask again, she says maybe and leaves it at that
>I say fuck it and just ignore her, since she would not stop talking about some other guy that's known her way longer than me, and she was seeking attention
>Me ignoring her has made her more incomfortable and has triggered her to walk up to me and talk more, she also looks at me a lot more now
What the fuck do I do? She was leading me on previously, and before I couldn't stop thinking about her. Do I keep ignoring her and rarely talking to her, or do I try again?
Ignore and find someone new.
>>16436238
What do I do about her constantly looking at me and talking to me? What is she trying to do?
Try again. When she refuses, go back to ignoring her.
If it becomes a problem, tell her to stop leading you on.
Why are all my friends becoming feminists? I used to have a lot of friends, but slowly I am being pushed out, thrown to the side for being... well me? am I being passed up by something? did I miss something? My friends don't invite me to places as much and when they do it always ends in me having to defend myself in someway to their bullying... what do I do?
Their motivation doesn't really matter. Even if you understood it, you couldn't change it.
What you do is just make new friends.
>>16436203
This is what tumblr does to people. It corrupts them into SJW fags. I've lost a few friends to that shit. It's absolutely disgusting.
>>16436210
yeah but we've been friends for so long, and because I don't want to join them they treat me like I am garbage... it all seems so ridiculous though... they became the kind of people me and my other friends would laugh about, people you didn't think really existed but my friends have become them. I still have a couple of guy friends, but I liked being in a group of girls... I never was fully accepted being I was so different from them from the beginning, but they've gone completely off the deep end now.
Before I get to my question, some back-story: I'm a 23 year old male virgin living with my parents. I have no friends to speak of, no dreams, no passions, no college degree or qualifications and no chance of finding love because I'm socially retarded and physical human contact makes me feel very uncomfortable. I'm not a NEET but the job I have is a low paying one, only allowing me to get by if I live at home, so moving out is completely out of the question.
So what I want advice on is, what the hell am I to do with my life? It's obvious that I'm not meant to live a normal life with friends or a girlfriend, a career or marriage and children later on. But what else is there? Sure, I can continue to be as I am, but working a dead end job and distracting myself with mindless entertainment can only get me so far.
I've been slipping in and out of depression, anxiety and alcoholism for years now, so it's important that I find something meaningful to do with myself before my mental health suffers even more.
>>16436074
You sound almost like me OP.
I try to get by day by day. Always have a goal in mind. We all get shitty days or phases. Time is essential but dont stress over it too much because even the healthiest people can die from a freak heart attack.
It sounds like you are living in a good condition. Use this time to develop something. Almost every artist had to work and work like dirt to produce something meaningful.
Stand on your own feet anon, and imagine you have the best idea you want to invest...
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>>16436082
>Use this time to develop something.
That's the thing, I really don't know what to do.
>I hope you've been saving at least some money in a savings account.
I don't have enough disposable income for that.
Guess no one else is gonna reply.
How the fuck can i know if a girl is just being nice or is down to something else?
Ask her?
>>16436043
wouldnt it be weird?
>>16436042
hope for the best, and prepare for the worst.
as in, explore whats happening but don't open yourself to being hurt by it.
Why the hell would a girl completely go silent on me out of nowhere? Was seeing and sleeping with this girl the last month or so, having a good time. We got along well and were really compatible.
Last saw her on Sunday, kissed goodbye and exchanged a light text that night. After that, silence. I've messaged her a couple things, nothing needy, just conversation and can't get a reply.
What the fuck. Did she fall down a well or something? Has anyone dealt with this before?
She's cheating and/or it's over
Under 25: she's mad because of random reasons which she will never explain.
25 or over: a man with higher value is already fucking her, she doesn't need you anymore.*
*may also apply to under 25
I had the same, she had more prospects
why does it seem like everyone smokes weed? obviously i know not everyone but it seems like all entertainers, musicians etc are daily smokers and consider it absolutely vital to their whole lifestyle and mindset.
i hate the dependency aspect of it all, that without smoking some plant you can't feel good or enjoy things or be creative or think deeply. how can people be so comfortable being so reliant on something so transient, so impermanent, disappearing as soon as it begins?
i know so many people who rely on weed to handle everything in their lives, the concept of solving a personal issue soberly solely by thinking is totally alien to them, they need to drug themselves into a stoned stupor to feel better.
rather than making me embrace it, it really turns me off and induces a deep sense of disillusionment towards it. i don't want to be dependent on weed, i don't want to be creative or whatever if i can't be like that without it. i'd be plagued by doubts: is it me or the weed? if i can't do this sober, what does that mean? if i can only accomplish something high, or "be" a certain way because i'm high, then it's not a personal attainment, it's entirely dependent on the drug.
does ANYONE here agree with me and this way of thinking? i'd honestly rather be bored, depressed, devoid of pleasure than getting my kicks from inhaling smoke and thereby becoming dependent on it. all my stoner friends are veritable buddhas when they're stoned but ill tempered bastards the minute they come down and run out. then they desperately call their contacts looking for more.
to me, it seems like an unwise lifestyle choice in the longterm view. shouldn't we be developing coping mechanisms that rely on nothing but our own thinking rather than an external thing like drugs? if anxiety or depression is caused due to a problem in my lifestyle, then drugging myself will only mask the symptoms, not solve the fundamental problem. how can people be so deceived by this?
It's a cheap way to avoid emotional issues. Also, it makes things funny as fuck
I unregularly smoke it and I feel like a degenerate when I do. It does feel good but it's not worth the risk here in England to smoke it.
>>16435706
What advice are you asking for? This board is to ask for advice. If you don't like weed, don't smoke it. Are you actually high right now? Your post is garbage
>Being single for 2 years
>Match cute girl on Tinder
>Girl starts to talk to me
>I reply to her and start to have a good conversation
>Everything is going great
>We share a lot of interests
>Only 2 days of knowing each other
>We decide to meet up
>wtf.png
>She...
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>I agree only because I don't want to be rude
Are you by chance retarded?
>>16435731
Not at all, I mean, she was kind of typsy and since it was the first time ever we met , I didn't want to look rude
the first time meeting is the BEST TIME to be rude. Get your point across that you're only looking for friends, at least with her.
You dined and dashed, with the reason being retarded. Of course she's gonna follow up. Tell her the truth, that you only like men and were under the effects of hallucinogenics.
If I can't find work is there any reason why I shouldn't kill myself? Even people who fucked around in HS and got GEDs can get their lives together but I can't.
I was a NEET for six years after high school and a hikikomori for two-three of those. I have a job now. If you can't find a job you've either not put yourself out there enough/gotten your lucky break yet or are approaching job hunting wrong (bad resume, etc.). Shit takes work,
time, luck, and sometimes connections. Be patient and willing to reevaluate what you're doing.
You've applied for literally every job?
McDonalds?
Janitor work?
My mother is a human resource manager and she says that the acceptance to even get an interview is like one in every 1000 resumes submitted. that might be off but you get the idea.
I remember it took me like a YEAR to get my first real job.
my recent job only took me like two weeks, but im managing an office for a psychic so yeah.
point is that you just gotta keep applying. everyone CAN get a job, it just takes time and some compromise sometimes.
How come when I smoke dank weed, I only get a body high? Vaping literally does nothing for me until I smoke the ABV to get that left over body-high CBD. I took a 2 month tolerance break and it didn't make a single difference.
Do I just have a permanent THC tolerance?
bumpa-doodle
>>16435434
try different kinds of 420
look for sativa vs indica
either that or you're doing it wrong
>>16435518
I'm not doing it wrong. I've been smoking for a year and for the most of it I was getting wicked lit regardless of strain.
Hello Internet, I'm not okay
>>16435381
what's the matter?
I'm not entirely sure, it's sort of everything and nothing. I think I'm depressed but I don't tick all the boxes and the boxes I do tick I'm not sure if I've just convinced myself that it's true or if my actual problem is I'm constantly convincing myself that I'm not okay, that makes sense right?
My mind is as though it's all tangled, but I feel like if people know it's tangled it will be okay and everyone will understand me
I grew up in a smaller town where it's wasn't considered okay to be gay. I think I internalized a lot of the disgust that people had with homosexuality and it comes out in my sex life. I'm single because dating hasn't really worked out and so I look to random encounters.
I recognize that I have a lot of problems. However, my most immediate problem is what I'm attracted to. A lot of people get confused by this so I'll try to be clear as possible. I'm attracted to getting ripped off by good looking men who then laugh at me for paying them...
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You can probably give me some money, first.
>>16435287
If I knew you were an attractive straight guy, I probably would.
you might be the one instance where I'd say internalized homophobia is the cause.
seriously though, stop hating yourself man.
Live in the UK and have a really boring personality. pls help anons
watch/listen to comedy and comedians all the time.. theres gotta be a shitload of radioshows and podcasts out there. i bet after a few months of this influence you'll be a lot funnier
>>16435239
any recs?
>>16435240
Not him but if you haven't heard the Ricky Gervais xfm shows you should give those a go, they're are pretty good banter for beginners
