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::Life Plan Thread::
A thread to see /adv/'s aspirations
What I plan to do in life
>Learn french during my final year of highschool
>Go on a Tour De France (probably by myself)
>Apply for ADFA (Aus Defence Force Academy) and hope I get in
>Study for whatever for a year or two
>If like it i'll stay, if not they pay me about $40K p.a :D
>Move to France and use money to study something at low tuition fees
>Find a qt 3.14
qt 3.14, fall in love... do whatever from that point on
As a stoic, I can't really see much else to do
I have no idea what my life plan is
>20
>Have been single my entire life because apparently I just cant get into a relationship
>Studying something at Uni I only have a passing interest in
>No real idea what I want to do later on in life
To be honest
All I really want out of life is a nice girl to settled down with
And the freedom to explore some shit. Go to some different countries and stuff
Thats it. Other than that Im just taking it day by day although Im really struggling to see the point of life at the moment
>>14988318
I'm you but 7 years older.
>>14985815
i need to continue this thread from before as my paranoia has not abated.
i have recently been accused of child molestation by my niece when she was staying with us over 10 years ago.
i have realized that there has been much unrest regarding their family and mine which has nothing to do with the accusations at hand but still may yet relate to spites related to our families.
in middle school my elder cousin stayed with us in lieu of attending rehabilitation for drug abuse, the result of which was physical abuse of myself at the hands of said cousin.
during my high school years from 2001 to 2004 elder cousin's sister's daughter and son stayed with my family. as of now i am being accused of this niece who is serving in the military and seeing a psychiatrist that i sexually molested her during that time.
i was involved in heavy arguments over the internet with the cousins' mother via email over allegations of misunderstanding and familial disrespect. it is known that she is incredibly sensititve and harbors a hatred towards the "tainted blood" in my mothers family as my father who is korean having tainted the famliy blood, thus leading to her hatred of him, myself and my younger brother.
i hold an incredible anger in the fact that i never pressed charges against my cousin for his physical assault on me when i was in middle school, and now the fact that i am being accused of molestation of his niece when such events have never occurred. at the same time i am incredibly paranoid that this could develop further into allegations that could potentially slander my reputation and may even land me in jail.
i have moved out from my parents place, happliy married and am on the cusp of landing a career position that will change my life for the better. srsly how can i move on from this?
pic semi-unrelated it's when i used to work at game crazy around the troubled times.
>srsly how can i move on from this?
You can't, not until it's resolved.
Do you know anything specifically about the allegations? Do you have any idea why she would accuse you of molestation?
>>14991737
my best guess is that my door must have been open while i was jerking it during my high school days and it must have traumatized her in some way.
i never fucking did anything to the poor girl. yet her psychiatrist must have fixated on some perverted version of these events to place the blame on me.
srsly i dont deserve to have my name defamed and my life ruined over this shit. i try my best to avoid any kinda family drama, and this is the worst kinda shit i can get thrown on me. i feel incredibly betrayed, not to mention i feel paranoid as shit about what i should or shouldn't say. i want to confront my family and defend myself, but lawyers and anons have advised that the best thing i can do is isolate myself.
i just feel like that makes me more guilty.
>>14991726
Honestly you need to move on and stop stressing about this shit. It doesn't help you with anything. You're just stressing yourself out over some words that have probably been twisted. Just listen to your lawyer and do what he says. You trying to figure shit out isn't your job its his.
Get your life back on track. Keep going forward, looking back does nothing.
aunt called mom this morning. mom called me asking if i molested my niece while she was staying with us 10 years ago while i was in high school. worst case scenario, she accidentally saw me jerking it while going to use the restroom late at night. what do i do?
>10 years ago
tell your mom you were jerking it in the bathroom and she may have saw
OP here
minor additional details: niece is currently seeing a psychiatrist.
>>14985824
that's pretty much what i told my mom. about to land a prestigious job, happily married and now i might possibly go to jail? srsly dont need this shit right now.
Why is it so hard to actually have a relationship with a girl?
20, never had one. Only ever been on dates and occasionally kissed girls on nights out.
I just cant make anything stick and I dont know why
And its a self perpetuating cycle because I feel like I'm missing out on a core part of life experience by never having had a special... anyone.
And that makes me really want someone
And that makes me come off desperate, which isnt attractive at all
If you have your own place and stable income for expenses, it's easy. Imagine your best friend. Now imagine the qualities you like about your best friend with a nice set of tits and a vagina. This best friend will have sex and do naughty things if you tell her she's pretty, she'll cook for you if you tell her that her cooking skills are the best, and you'll always have her warm, soft, slightly squishy body to cuddle with and keep you warm at night. Her hair will smell like strawberries and sweet pea, her hair is silky soft, and her waist will seem like the perfect fit for wrapping your arm around while you cuddle.
You'll play vidya together, you'll argue about stupid things, you'll discuss religion and past lovers, she'll complain about her periods and be a nervous wreck until she gets her next period. She'll want chocolates and flowers on Valentine's day, as well as the occasional back rub. But for all the things she asks for, she'll repay them ten-fold if she loves you
Pic unrelated, the MX5 is delighted by the snow
>>14988493
God you're a bastard. Luckily I have this, but if I were already upset about not having a gf, this could make me fucking cry myself to sleep.
>>14988493
You're just describing the perfect relationship to me.
Doesn't really help me when my problem is I cant seem to get a girl to even consider me as boyfriend material
Calling femanons, preferably
/adv/
I broke up with my girlfriend a couple nights ago. It's a very long story, but we do still love each other, and it was really hard for me to do.
After a lot of her begging, pleading, and crying -- all three of which I am just not good with -- she finally said, "I love you, and I'm going to let you go."
Finally, I thought... if only because that's what I really wanted to hear.
But then she begged a single favor: that when I have taken time for myself, may it take months, or even years, that I reach out to her so that she can have one more chance with me. Given that I we had only told each other moments prior that we were "always" going to love each other (I think we meant different things by that, though), I lazily and hesitantly said, "Okay."
Her spirits lifted, we parted ways almost kind of happily, because she was essentially telling herself that this breakup was more of "pause", and that everything was going to be okay for us. I reminded her that this was nevertheless a breakup, and that I couldn't promise her anything. Whether or not she understood that, I have no idea.
/adv/, should I feel bad for her possibly having this impression that we may someday be back in each other's arms? Is this a normal thought process for a female being broken up with? Will this sense of hope fade? I'm not saying that our having a future is impossible, per se, but it's definitely the last thing I'm thinking about right now, since I'm all geared up and set to take care of myself as a single man.
Your thoughts and input are much obliged, /adv/. Thank you.
FIRE-FIST ACE!
>>14974490
Haha... I can dig it.
bump, my kind fellows
Hey /b/ros.
So, the wife and I have been married for 12 years, and over the last 5 or so, we've been having some marriage issues that have been getting worse and worse. We've both done some things that have caused the other to lose trust... neither of us have actually cheated, but we are not nearly as close, and since we've lost that closeness, we've both done some stupid things.
What I do that is dumb is that I will read her messages, hack the password to her laptop, so on and so forth, because I feel that she is hiding things from me. I know that this stems from my low self esteem, my moderate to severe bouts of depression, and my moderate to severe paranoia. 95% of the time, i don't find anything, and then, around the time I start to feel like I can back off, I find something where she says hurtful things about me, or does something that makes me feel insecure again.
I am trying to stop searching through her stuff, unfortunately, in the moment, I don't have the willpower I need to stop myself. I always feel bad about it afterwards, but that doesn't change the fact that I do it. I asked her what she would like me to do when I get the urge to start digging, and she said she would have to think about it, and that it was a fair question.
That was last Friday that I asked her, and I haven't gotten an answer yet. I've been feeling the temptation to dig again, as it's been a while since I've dug. I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to hold out, and I don't want to damage our relationship anymore with my weaknesses.
What do you recommend, anons and femanons?
Also, it would be shiny if this board had an auto refresh feature. -_-
And yes, this was copied from /b/... I tend to try there first (higher traffic and all, and I've gotten some surprisingly good advice from there).
>>14967334
Just leave her alone. Stop searching through her stuff. Spend that time on you. Go to a gym, read a book, do anything you like or might be useful for you.
Also, try talking with her more often. Bonus points for having sex.
>Have large goal
>Can't become motivated to do the grind to reach it
>Using and training self-discipline is the only other option
>Already using loads of discipline and willpower just being a normalfag due to terrible past
How can i stop feeling like a victim
It's all in your head. The only one stopping you from doing what you want is yourself.
Do you want to change? Then change. Your lack of motivation comes from yourself.
If something is important to you, you'll find a way; otherwise you'll find an excuse.
You're not gonna make it brah.
If you need willpower to be something you're not you're better off putting that willpower elsewhere.
Old thread: >>379136
Companion Planting - Raised Beds - Vertical Gardening - Square Foot Gardening - Polyculture - Composting - Mulching - Vermiculture - Espalier - Fungiculture - Aquaponics - Greenhouses - Cold Frames - Hot Boxes - Polytunnels - Forest Gardening - Aquaculture
Resources:
Murray's DVDs on Aquaponics, (sample: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYR9s6chrI0 )
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/5357600/Aquaponics_Made_Easy
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/6263904/Aquaponics.The.First.12.Months.And.Aquaponics.DIY.DOCU.DVDRip.Xv
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/5699014/Aquaponics_Secrets
Backyard Aquaponics Mag,
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/7670763/BYAP_-_Backyard_Aquaponics_Magazine_15_Editions
Backyard Aquaponics System.
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/8071079/Backyard_Liberty_Aquaponics_System
400+ PDF BOOKS ON GARDENING
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/5247926/400__PDF_BOOKS_ON_GARDENING
Youtube channel Growingyourgreens, tons of videos on almost every single gardening subject,
https://www.youtube.com/user/growingyourgreens
Ollas clay pot watering system,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkNxACJ9vPI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvKq5geEM-A
USA Time of Year Planting Guide,
http://www.motherearthnews.com/organic-gardening/what-to-plant-now-zl0z0903zalt.aspx
Food preservation,
http://nchfp.uga.edu/
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/6835572/Canning_and_Preserving_All-in-One_For_Dummies_2011_-Mantesh
http://fantes.com/manuals/all-american-pressure-cooker-manual.pdf
Mushrooms, (culinary and psychoactive):
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/4970660/Mushroom_Growing_Literature_Video_Collection
Mother Earth News' Vegetable Garden Planner program, (full version requires yearly subscription $fee)
http://www.motherearthnews.com/garden-planner/vegetable-garden-planner.aspx
Tons of Gardening/Farming PDFs
http://www.fastonline.org/?page_id=35
Aquaponics
http://www.fastonline.org/?page_id=32
US Farm Income and Taxes,
http://www.hobbyfarms.com/farm-marketing-and-management/farm-income-taxes-14991.aspx
US Grants and Loans for Small Farms,
http://www.usda.gov/wps/portal/usda/usdahome?navid=GRANTS_LOANS
http://afsic.nal.usda.gov/farms-and-community/grants-and-loans-farmers
http://www.nal.usda.gov/afsic/pubs/funding.shtml
Managing Risks on Your Small Farm,
http://agmarketing.extension.psu.edu/begfrmrs/MangRiskSmllFrm.pdf
Chicken info and forum,
http://www.backyardchickens.com
Rabbit guide
http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/7884798/Rabbit_Production_Manual
A public access seedbank for many types of rare or endangered plants; both edible and ornamental,
http://www.jlhudsonseeds.net/index.htm
Organic and heirloom selections:
http://sustainableseedco.com/
http://www.seedsofchange.com/
Potato, Sweet Potato, and Tubers seed bank (free, but requies filling out forms and waiting in line):
http://www.cipotato.org/
Awesome interactive plant/gardening maps for USA, Canada, France, UK, BC, (frost dates, temp zones, etc):
http://www.plantmaps.com/index.php
Sprout seeds and info:
sproutpeople.org
Insect Habitats for attracting polinating bees, predatory/parasitic wasps, hibernating ladybugs, butterflies, etc.
http://www.inspirationgreen.com/insect-habitats.html
Toad and Hedgehog Habitats,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JetkWtw7Jc
http://familycrafts.about.com/od/frogcrafts/a/How_To_Make_A_Toad_Village.htm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/breathingplaces/hedgehog_home/
http://www.britishhedgehogs.org.uk/leaflets/L5-Hedgehog-Homes.pdf
Chili Peppers!
http://www.fatalii.net/
More on Aquaponics & Aquaculture,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=26xpMCXP9bw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=_WgfaJjvfxA
Planted some of these bad boys today, hopefully they germinate well in the container I've got them in. If not I've got ~1990 seeds left, I should be alright.
>>400932
Seeds from the year 1990 or 1,990 seed count?
This girl and I have been texting for about 3 weeks now and we started subcommunicating to the point where she had basically asked me "Is there someone you like?". At that point I said I'll tell her how I really feel, and said that I can picture us being together at some point, but just not now. The following dialogue then took place.
>>14928534
you failed the shit test m8
>>14928534
She's not interested in being more than friends. It's up to you whether or not you want to stick around
is it wrong to sleep with a girl who is in a ldr but wants to break up with her bf anyway?
>>14884253
Make her break up with her boyfriend.
Fuck her.
i dont feel really guilty, but my gut tells me to not do it.
>>14884256
how so
I met a nice guy and we started seeing each other on a regulary basis (2x a week). We had a wonderful time until my sister asked if we are exclusive after 2 months. I told her i don't really know, that i don't see other guys and that he said he isn't seeing other girls but we are not in a relationship. Ahe said this is realy weird and i need to find out. I brushed it off and went home. I kept thinking about her words and apparently started to get a bit too clingy. After a week he started to back off and act strange. I waited a couple if days (could have been just bad mood) and them asked what was wrong. After a long conversation we finaly found out that he felt pressured by my clingyness and that things went to fast. So we decided to take a step back. We were back to out former selfe and it went very well. Then maby 3 weeks later it started to bug me that he acted distant and cold again. I was a bit emotional anyways and told him that we should just stop "us" if he does not feel it. I told him we could be fwb because i like him as a friend and the sex is great. He did not want that. So we decided to give us some space and not see each other for one and a half week. 4 days in he asked i he could come over. I was really horny so i said yes. It was weird, because he suddenly was very loveydovey. The lack of intimacy outside of the bed was what upset me in the first place. So where did that come from so suddenly? Well, 3 days later he asks me out for dinner. I say ok because i am curious what's the matter for his new strange behaviour. We have a wonderful evening and then he INSISTS on paying for everythig. Until that day we always split bills. We went for a walk and ended up sleeping together at my place.
I am really confused /adv/. Whats up with us? Are we fwb now? Why is he so cuddly suddenly? I tought i habe drove him away too far with my dumb shit and pressuring him...
Your sister played you like a damn fiddle.
And I guess your guy just realised that he actually had a sweet girl that wanted him. Now he appreciates you.
>>14875889
I see that now. And i made a point to not act on somebody elses shit anymore. I did not feel like pressuring him or taking things to the next level. She just got me thinking and that was a real pitty. I just tought the damage was to big. He ha a bad breakup not ver long ago (5 months). And he has a hard time trusting/opening up again. He just needs time and i can respect that. Don't know how i could have been so dumb. Now i just try to keep the damage as small as possible.
>>14875889
This. I can totally relate to that guy.
Just be careful not to pressure him emotionally and everything should be fine.
ITT: Best advice you've ever gotten.
Don't pick someone you can live with. Pick someone you can't live without.
best advice I've ever gotten:
Don't pick someone you can live with. Pick someone you can't live without.
literally just got it like 3 seconds ago
More like quotes that somehow got into my head
>Pleasure unearned consumed itself
>Muscles aching to work, minds aching to create – this is man
Also, something I realized by myself: take life seriously, but people not so much.
Anons I need your help. BADLY
There's this girl I'm crushing on that met Monday in my one of my college classes. We ate together and spoke to each other but still don't know each other too well. Only had a short lunch twice with her. Once Monday and once today. I've made her laugh and giggle really hard but I keep getting mixed signals from her and literally don't know how to ask her out.
I asked out and dated girls before but not since high school. And I've only really liked one. (Not to mention all of the asking out was done through texting so I'm kind of screwed here) I'm a Junior in college now and tired of doing this beta shit. I genuinely like her and don't know what to say. I keep "planning out" these scenarios on how to do it about it but forget what to do or say when I do.
I'm also VERY BAD at reading signals. One of my ex's tried flirting with me for 3 months before we started dating. How do you tell if she's into you?
How do you guys usually ask girls out? What should I do? She went home for the weekend to see her family and I see her again in class on Monday. Was thinking of making a move then.
Her personality/ Appearance: She's very down to Earth, likes anime and manga, and hanging around her "girlfriends". She's funny and curses a lot. (FUCK THIS, FUCK THAT, FUCK YOU, etc.) Can't confirm this for sure but from speaking to her, it sounds like she's never had a boyfriend before. She's one of those people that are huge fan of Superheroes but doesn't really read the comics or watch movies (I offered her some Wonder Woman books to borrow and she got really excited and giddy about it, she reading them right now) She says she has ADHD and spends a lot of time on tumblr.
She looks something like the picture but maybe a little heavier. She has these gorgeous blue eyes, short red hair, and piercing on her eyebrow (Her friend did it for her, fucked it up, and now she has a bruise) Her eyes are really beautiful and intimidating, and I freeze up every time I see them.
Ask her to go out with you for coffee or something and try flirting withe her to see if she responds favorably. Best case scenario is you get a date, worst case is you lose a friend.
>>14757375
What specifically have you said when asking a girl out anon? I think I need big help there. If I could get a reenactment of what you do that would help me out a lot. I'm really shy when it comes to that shit and its killing me from the inside
[spoiler]It also doesn't help that she's the only thing close to a friend I think I have on campus. I just transferred here[/spoiler]
Hey, I've recently turned 19 and have been to a few small house parties. During a couple of these parties, guys would bring girls over and try to fuck them. At one party, the girl declined and literally everyone treated her (and her friend that she brought with her, and who must've been brought there to have sex with one of the guys at the party) like shit for declining. It was the weirdest thing and I'm still a little emotionally scared by it (I'm a 19 kissless virigin and I couldn't rape another human being)
At another party, a couple was making out and someone else forcibly began to finger the girl until she started to cry.
Then at another party the same guy from above raped his girlfriends best friend while she was passed out.
All of this is so completely confusing to me, I have no idea what I should do when I bring a girl back to my place for a couple of drinks. Should I force myself upon her? Wait for the signals? Does this sort of thing happen often?
>>14706041
What kind of fucking people do you hang out with?
>>14706045
There is a 100% chance this is bait.
>>14706047
>>14706045
This isn't bait, should I drop contact with all of these people? could you two answer a couple of my questions as they're serious.
why is it wrong for a girl (who is in a relationship) to be friend with a guy who said he has romantic feelings for her?
It's not as long as you put him in his place.
>>14666798
for the same reason it is wrong for a man to be friends with a girl who said has romantic feelings for him. This isn't a gender issue and if you alone don't see what's wrong with it I don't think anyone on this board will be able to make you see why it is.
>>14666798
It's not. You might make your partner feel uncomfortable, though. If you don't care about that or you can make him say he doesn't mind, even though he does (I mean, in case he mentioned it once, then he probably does). Then it's okay. It can lead to a bunch of problems though, depending on the guy.
