Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2261. page
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You know the drill
I love you so much and all i want is to make you proud. I'm so happy with our relationship. Hope you never leave me.
>>16381930
ALRIGHT, I'VE GIVEN UP! I'M GOING BACK TO BEING A REAL MAN! GOING BACK TO BEING A REAL PLAYER! THIS SHIT WAS ABSURD, WOMAN. Forgive me.
>>16381938
initials?
![male-and-female-relationship-sign[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/UdQf7wv.jpg "male-and-female-relationship-sign[1]")
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking
>Brandon or Female Brandon
Piss off.
Girls
Why do you tell a guy you want to go on a date with him, then proceed to not text or call him back when he tries to set things up? So evil!
>>16372916
Probably because it's easier than saying no
>>16372916
Because I didn't expect him to take no for an answer, and I couldn't begin cold shouldering him until I ended that conversation.
Old one hit the bump limit
Being a fat, lazy girl helplessly in love with your friend with whom you're not talking anymore because you fucked up truly is an endless suffering
and I suffer a lot now, I just want you to know /adv/
>>16359877
I love myself
>>16359897
Emily?
Would you or wouldn't you and why? Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
>>16320596
Straight female here, but my answer would be the same regardless of sex or orientation: No.
Would I forgive them as a person and not hold hate against them? Yes.
Would I give them another chance? Absolutely not.
I definitely believe in "once a cheater, always a cheater".
>got drunk and kissed someone else?
maybe
>sucked my best friends dick in the middle of my birthday party
probably not
probably not, because that cheating will haunt the rest of the relationship
everytime something I don't like happens I will remember the cheating and create an "enemy image" of the person
I'm convinced that the drives to survive and reproduce are the most basic form of genetic programming in life, and every other more complex behaviour in life derides from these drives in some form.
After all these are the core of what Freud, and Nietzsche said, and are the crux of entire fields of study in psychology and biology.
Anyway, yesterday I had a debate with some monkeys before being censored and shut up by a PR mod, and they countered by stating asexuality as a sexual orientation.
I disagreed, stating that all sexual orientations (homo/hetero/bi), still function on those basic needs for human interaction and physical intimacy. Asexuality, is literally the opposite of that. And I asked them what could lead a biologically sexual being to reject the need for sexuality. Concluding that in the end it must either be a form of mental illness (in the form depression), or some physiological or genetic deficiency that prevents the basic drive from manifesting. I even accepted that for people that CHOOSE to be asexual, that sex drive is still manifesting in some higher for of CREATIVITY, see inventora, writers, poets, etc... one way or another, the human being has a NEED to leave information behind, be it as ideas or genes.
Ofc, this pissed everohe off, and I got banned. So this morning I did some reading on the matter, and OF COURSE, there is a "special snowflake" social justice movement here too. I read some articles claiming that asexuality was an orientation, but they were just polls with no actual studies being done, and funny enough, the asexual community claims that asexuality is different from celibacy... which, would make it an illness or deficiency 100% of the time according to them.
So, for the sake of hearing different opinions, was I wrong in anything I said? And if so, how?
If you want to win debates like that, you have to cite some sources. Find some studies on asexuality and memorize the authors and year of publication.
>>16321456
See, that's the thing. Everyone has to be so goddamned sensitive. I'm a pedo, I'm perfectly aware that it's atypical, and probably due to a genetic mutation or something that I can't control. But I'm not afraid to admit that. I don't need to delude myself that I'm totally normal and that I just HAVE to fit in, because the truth is I'm just different due to factors way out of my control. I can only imagine how pissed this must make other people with genuine mental disorders who have no choice but to face the realities of their problems every day.
Granted, I don't go about showing my disorder to everyone, lest I be locked away for being a "potential threat". But at least these people can go to therapists and psychologists without the fear of bring arrested for trying to get help.
>>16321456
>I asked them what could lead a biologically sexual being to reject the need for sexuality.
Just a proposal: when a population grows a sexual drive stops to be a signifucant one. I am not sure really.
Do girls like quiet guys?
>>16334664
No.
Not if you're not good looking.
Hang on, I'll ask all 3.5 billion of them. Give me a second.
I mean think about it /adv/... DUDES HAVE SHOT AND KILLED PEOPLE IN A SPREE SHOOTING FASHION because they couldn't get girlfriends. How could not having a girlfriend be so detrimental to society? Its crazy to think that one kiss or hug could have STOPPED so many spree shootings.
I am a male and have never had a girlfriend and I am 25. I feel terrible like all the time. Primarily because it feels like the world is shit and most people in it are shit and the women in it don't understand anything deep or meaningful. That obviously probably isn't true but its how my mind feels. I just really REALLY dislike how most women don't understand remotely what its like to be a male in todays society.
An average male in todays society is considered shit. Just imagine if you are a BELOW average male or if you lack something all the other males have? Like for example, a car. You can't be a man in todays society without some fucking wheels. Its a terrible world we live in. All these fucking sunk costs. Help me...
What's your actual question? If you just want to bitch, >>>/r9k/
>>16308954
CAN YOU NOT FUCKING READ!?
>DUDES HAVE SHOT AND KILLED PEOPLE IN A SPREE SHOOTING FASHION because they couldn't get girlfriends. How could not having a girlfriend be so detrimental to society?
>>16308960
What advice would you like?
>fem, 19
So a little while ago I was with this group of friends, and there was this one guy I sort of fancied.
>a bit of a lumberjack but in a good way.
Well, a few months into knowing him, I see him with this girl from the group on his lap, and they're hugging.
I was all, "Oh, okay. He has a girlfriend. Well at least I know now. sweet!" and I get on with my life.
A few days in they're still like that. I sit next to them reading a book. (I got used to the rather innocent PDA.) the girl was sitting on his lap as usual so her back was facing me; her arms still around his neck.
We're all having a good time talking when I feel something warm on my hand. It's the guy's finger gently stroking my hand from under the table. I glance from my book up to him; he's looking at me with a rather coy expression. I was quickly filled with disgust.
>How can you have the audacity to flirt with me when your girlfriend is literally right on top of you?!
Instead of making a scene, however, I simply kept reading my book, calmly took hold of his finger, and bent it back as far as it'll go without breaking it. He quietly grunted and slunk his hand away. that got the message across for sure.
But here's the twist. the next day I was talking with some other friends from the group, who knew the guy much longer than did, when I mentioned those two as a couple. they clarified that they weren't actually dating and that they're just very touchy-feely sometimes.... Oh you've got to be kidding...
I feel like such an asshole.... but at the same time... Augh! I'm just so confused.
I need help processing this.
You acted properly in that situation, no need to feel yourself like an asshole. If the guy didn't expect this reaction from a decent girl, he's a proper autist. If he wants something from you, he should have been straightforward.
>>16329228
Never go near him, he's a fucking douche and he'll prolly be wid some1 else if u get together with him
he sounds like the asshole
hey i'm a girl and I don't get why there is a problem with abortion
like I don't want a kid right now I'm not going have a kid into poverty I don't want. cus that how criminals become, from broken familys
Like I don't have to save every fucking sperm cell, every time a guy jizzes.
like the seed fell into the ground, It doesn't have to grow if its a poison tree
Whats the REAL reason why religions people are so angry about your fucking unborn collection of cells
What the big deal, I should be able to do it safely by state, not have conservatives try to make me wait months with these new laws. I'll just punch myself in the stomach. But again I shouldn't have to hurt myself to get something done like that because some weirdos have problems
Because religions thrive on the religious. You need people to sustain the community through the generations. They simply don't want to lose potential converts.
This is also why murder is forbidden but warfare is readily encouraged. The subtext is that it's okay to kill everyone else. Just don't kill people from your tribe.
>>16322875
I really don't know why other girls get tricked so easily by religion, whats the problem
why are they so willing to ruin their lives
>>16322875
>hey i'm a girl
So......no one cares about your opinions on your own body.
>I get horny when I'm drunk
>I drink
>>16306739
>>16306786
You guys sound fun.
>>16306793
>needing to poison your body to have fun
You seem intelligent.
I live alone with my older brother. I love him a lot, we're really close. We've lived alone together since I was 16, I had problems with our mom so I moved in with him. We've been nothing but happy since.
He has been seeing this girl for about a year now. She hates me guts, why? No idea but from the day we've met she's hated my guts even though I've been nothing but polite to her. I don't think my brother realizes it though. She's always being condescending and sassy towards me. She glares at me all the time. She hates it when my brother does anything with me. To put it simply, she's a C-word.
She's been staying over here a lot more often. Since my big brother works, I'm the one that cooks and cleans in the house. Whether it's cooking or cleaning, she'll try to find some way to one up me or undermine what I'm doing. For example I wake up at 5AM everyday to make breakfast for my brother so he can eat something nice before going to work. My brother wakes up at 6 so the breakfast will be ready and fresh for him by the time he wakes up. She'll wake up at 4AM just to one up me. It's not like I'm controlling about it, she could tell me she wants to cook but she purposely doesn't just to make me wake up and see that she has "beat" me to the punch. Whenever I make dinner she always has to have a comment like "I could make this so much better."
If I'm vacuuming the floor and she'll start criticizing for every little speck of dust I miss. If I'm folding the laundry she'll say I don't fold it right. If I make the bed she'll say I don't do it right. She finds any reason to put me down. I really dislike her. The worst part is whenever my brother wants to do anything alone with me she always finds a reason to get upset at him. She hates when he gives me attention even though she's already nabbing most of it.
I feel so sad. I've been trying my best to get along with her for my brother's sake but it's impossible. Why does she hate me so much? What do I do?
She is insecuire
Have you tried sitting down with her and asking her what her deal is? Have you talked to your brother about it?
>>16308675
"if you're so damn good why don't you do it then?"
Me and him met late last year and we hit it off pretty much right away. He was funny, smart, attractive and we got along great. We started off as friends but soon began seeing each other. He was always there for me throughout my self harm, depression and other personal/family problems I was facing.
In May of this year though I went out with some guy who I used to know and we got drunk. I basically ended up sleeping with him although I was really drunk.. it's not an excuse I know but I would not have done it if I was drunk. Anyways I kept this from him but he found out a month later after going through my messages.
He cut me off after finding out but I got back in touch with him a week later and after we talked about it for a while and I told him how sorry I was and he decided to forgive me and we gave our relationship another go. However I didn't feel like it'd work so I broke up with him two weeks or so later. He reluctantly agreed to remain friends.
I think shortly after this he began to drink more and more. I'd still call him every single day and we'd hang out sometimes.. although sometimes when we'd drink together he'd breakdown and/or get emotional about me and him. I know he really loved me but I guess I still love my other ex (my first bf who used to be abusive and cheated on me).
During the time we weren't together we were more or less fwb on and off. Idk if this messed with his head or gave him false hope. I definitely didn't always treat him well and I regret that.
Last night we hanged out and he ended up getting really drunk and yelled and shit at me. He was really drunk but it's happened a few times so I told him I don't want anything more to do with him but that I'd text/call him occasionally to see how he's doing. I also told him I started speaking to my ex again which was one of the things he accused me of doing.
He's now not answering my calls or is phone is switched off. He's not online either. I don't know what to do.. advice? :/
Kill yourself whore.
Kill yourself slut.
Kill yourself whore.
Write a letter to someone who you secretly wished would read it.
dear *insert girls name*
I wanted to get into your pants but you wouldn't let me, therefore i still think about you.
sincerely *insert guys name*
>>16311663
to m from k
what the heck are you playing it, you pillock? Don't you get it that I miss you? Do I really have to apologise and growel on my knees and maybe even offer apologetic blowjob so you'll be friends with me again? Bollocks
Dear J
Just tell me no already. Or yes. Fuck, just friendzone me and have it over with. Its obvious that you're not interested, but this needs to end one way or another on your terms, or else I'm just going to keep going forever. Shit's killing me
-J
![male-and-female-relationship-sign[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/YPX5ehc.jpg "male-and-female-relationship-sign[1]")
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking
>Brandon or Female Brandon
Piss off.
>Frog
Also piss off.
Reposting from the last thread: Guys
Guy A and B are both in relationships. B asks A if he ever gets bored being in a relationship. Is this a sign that B is bored and is thinking about breaking up? For what it's worth, they're both 23
Also reposting from last thread
Going to a club with my old roommates for my first time in a few years, and my second time ever. Leaving in around 45 minutes. Any advice guys? I just came back from a 7 hour workshop.
>>16308343
>>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
>Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know
Maybe B is bored is wants to spice the relationship up. Maybe B is concerned about A because he heard something from someone. We don't know enough to tell.
>>16308349
Drink. Dance.
Didn't see one
Sometimes I want to post a thread about my relationship issues but I don't because its done a lot I think and that I probably wouldnt like the advice I'd get anyways.
:/
I wish I had a road dog
oh man here it goes
i think my problems date back to two events in my childhood
one) when i was stripped away from my aunt who had raised me from todler to kindergardener and sent to my parents. i think the change was too much since both my parents had their own issues and frankly werent ready to raise a kid. my dad had a temper problem coupled with drinking and smoking issue that led him to be some what abusive on me and my mum. my mother , i still cant figure out, maybe she flat out wasnt ready or didnt know how to raise a kid. so i got beat a lot in contrast to living with my aunt where there were few consequences and at the end of the day i just got to chill with my cousins and learn from them. now im just alone and an only child. I know this is a major problem for me because i grew fearful of my parents and people noticed
two) in 1st grade there was a girl, ill call her "a", kids would always make fun of her i forget the details maybe she was autistic or something but she also had bad hygiene most noticable was yellow teeth. i would feel bad for her inside but ouside i mostly just followed with the other kids. one day for her mom came with her for some kind of back to school event. everything was different all the kids were acting nice like she was one of us and she and her mother were just oblivious to what was going on. even when i almost blew it before i caught on to what was hapening. this event in its self isnt what affected me but later i was also bullied. only reason i remember is how my mother always dressed me with tucked in button up shirts (im spic). one day it went pretty shitty and i ended up crying in the lunch line (i was still just a kid but by now i had stopped wearing button-ups). eventually things got better.
