Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1708. page
Images are sometimes not shown due to bandwidth/network limitations. Refreshing the page usually helps.
I have a slight anger problem, it's nothing extreme and I can control myself in most cases, but recently I blew my best friendship because I snapped at one point. I'll spare you the details, nothing physical happened though.
I really want to try to make sure this never happens again, once is one to many.
I'm considering getting a tattoo as a permanent reminder to myself to stay calm, and remember what anger brings with it.
I'd prefer a small tattoo as I don't want to spend a crapload of money on it.
I have no idea what I'd get and...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>16770403
>Any suggestions as to where and what I could get?
If you feel the need to solicit suggestions on location and design, then you shouldn't be getting a tattoo in the first place. Neither should many of the people who ARE sure of these things, of course, but getting one you aren't completely sure of is always a bad idea.
>>16770403
Any place that can be covered up with a shirt. As for what to get, draw some stuff out, show an artist ask for his opinion. Ultimately the choice will be yours but if it's going to be small don't fret over it too much.
Don't get kanji, get something original. For ex a friend of mine is heavily into the occult, he made a custom sigil he had associated with peace, (calm) and drew it out and had the artist place it on the back of his shoulder, a sigil must be wrought in blood (or semen/squid...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>16770429
That's why I ask for suggestions, maybe someone will give me an idea I didn't think of, it's not like I'll pick a suggestion I like and instantly roll with it. I do have some ideas myself but I don't know.
My friend really liked the fifth element, and so do I, getting that would be kinda cool. Would serve as a good reminder. Problem is my friend has that tattoo as well, then you enter on possible creepy territory.
>>16770443
That's...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
How do I look "good weird" instead of "bad weird"?
Don't fall into the trap of overcompensating with "weird" fashion sense. This works for some, but I think largely it's more unflattering.
Keep yourself well groomed. Most of the sexiest and most confident girls are some of the weirdest looking I think.
Hygiene. Make sure you don't smell bad, wear clean clothes, brush your teeth, clean your ears, go to the dermatologist if your skin is fucked, etc. Shit seems like common sense but I see tons of whiney neckbeards who definitely look awkward but if they just used some fucking dandruff shampoo they'd have a chance with at least some women.
It's about confidence. Find out what works for you. I've been bad weird my whole life and only suddenly I've started to learn how to do better weird.
The grooming thing can to a certain extent be an issue if you have visible problems like dandruff and acne, but more importantly they are only an issue if they take a toll on your confidence. I've gone a month without washing my hair, showering scarcely, wearing dark, ragged clothes. My hair matted and I looked like a stray, but I didn't care because I'm in college and I don't care about...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
My neighbor is out to get us. Literally, I live next to a lunatic. She's called the cops on my family for no reason, accusing us of stalking her and other illegal things. Every time the police respond, they investigate and conclude that in fact she is crazy but she hasn't done anything illegal. today i was taking out the garbage, she came out front to the sidewalk & put her fingers to her neck (a threat, las if she was saying "'m gonna cut you") as she filmed me with a camera. It was definitely her trying to provoke me and film a reaction. I told...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
It's been going on for years. What do I do?
is your neighbor effectsofmaledominance
>>16770394
Collect evidence/make notes of times and dates that she behaves erratically/dangerously. Present this to the police and request that mental health professionals get involved and hold her on a mandatory psyche hold.
If she is threatening you and behaving in an unsafe manner the police are legally obligated to report this to your local psychiatric unit, and remind them that not doing so is illegal, so don't stop calling them until they send a cop who is willing to do their job because nine times out...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
I think I'm ready. I'm don't feel scared anymore, but I don't want to go out drenched in my own blood.
What medications can I take in excess to put me down? I have some perscription pain pills, but my gf hid them somewhere. I'm willing to go out and buy something more effective, too.
If not, do you guys think its likely I'd pass out before I bled to death instead? I just don't want it to be excessively gory looking, I don't want to leave a messy cleanup, and I think that seeing blood everywhere might be a bit scarring. An...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
Don't kill yourself. It's so hard to OD on OTCs anyway. You'll end up in the hospital psych ward, maybe with some internal damage.
Just don't do it.
Hey man. You got a girlfriend. So your already doing better then me. You only get one life. And once its over, theres no telling where we go. Don't waste it. Live it to the fullest and be happy knowing your always doing better then someone else.
Why not just see a psychiatrist? It's not like you have anything to lose.
You're literally saying "yes, I could have a life full of happiness and important, worthwhile things, but instead I could kill myself and that's the more reasonable and attractive option."
I wish I could communicate this in some way that didn't make me sound like a detached piece of shit but unfortunately that is what I am at the moment.
>>16770265
Ending up in the psych ward is a good thing for a lot...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
I have pretty bad anxiety. It's been this way for years. Generally I'm just anxious about everything but specific things trigger it and make it worse. It's what I hate the most about myself.
I'm 19, currently dating this girl that's super amazing. Like a 10/10 to me. She's super smart and beautiful and I'm deeply in love with her. She loves me too. We have had a pretty solid relationship so far. No real big issues. Only a few little fights here and there. But I am struggling lately with my anxiety and I'm scared it's going...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>16770192
It's an anxiety that every single guy in the world has to deal with, and it's around that age at the end of your teens when you're worrying about that shit the most.
When you get a bit older you will realise you just have to come to terms with that worry. And use your judgement to decide one way or the other whether to trust a person. Your judgement is all you have at the end of the day - all you can do is make the best decisions you can.
If you really want to eliminate those worries...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>16770221
Thank you so much. That's actually better advice than I was expecting to receive on this site. Thanks anon.
>>16770281
Become more alpha" is literally the most retarded advice anyone could possibly give, ever.
There are actual ways to deal with, cope with and treat anxiety. Perhaps use one of those. Or see a psychiatrist who can see if you have an anxiety disorder (and, if you do, find ways to manage it.).
Seriously, impressing other people isn't going to help you because that isn't how the brain goddamn works.
>be last april
>dad tells me to move in with him (i was struggling on my own) and he'll help me with finishing college
>past few months have been a nightmare
>I contribute a small portion of rent because im poor
>rent is 1500, i pay 300, dad pays rest
>dad makes a little over 5000 a month, we're middle class, nothing special
>since about November,...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
>>16770146
Tell him he needs to sell his motorbike. it'll by you some time.
>>16770227
I don't know if he will, but can he do that if it's being financed? He put his paycheck as a down payment, now makes monthly payments on it.
He doesn't get paid until next thursday. I don't get paid until next wednesday, and the deadline to pay before eviction is the 8th.
>>16770240
Take up a small loan?
I have an almost full time job, and I start really early in the morning. Usually about 7-9 a.m. I work about 5 days a week. I get about 8-9 hours of sleep a night but I go to bed tired and then I wake up tired. Its getting really exhausting and I don't know what to do. My job is also very hard on my body and my muscles hurt all the time which makes it hard to fall asleep. I don't know what to do, does anybody have any advice how I could feel less tired?
If you have trouble falling asleep, have you tried melatonin? I've found it really helpful for that. It doesn't keep you asleep, but it can help put you there.
In the US and many other countries it is sold over the counter as a 'dietary supplement' but it has absolutely no dietary use and is really only used as a sleep aid.
Might be your diet, not getting all the protein and vitamins you need on a daily basis. Exactly how is your job hard on your body?
>>16770141
Honestly, there's no real advice for you other than getting a better job, or at least a place that pays better so you don't have to work so many days.
It doesn't really get any better apart from becoming numb to the stresses of work until you hurt yourself.
I'm $82,000 in school debt.
I have a job only pays 40,000. Sounds okay, but with $800 rent and utilities, cable, car payment, insurance, phone, food etc, it's not enough to pay my loan. I feel like I'm in a hole and there's no way out.
What should I do?
>>16770121
Go back in time and get a degree in something useful.
Get a cheaper apartment. If that doesn't cut it, ditch the cable and start taking public transportation. You easily make enough to get by on that.
>>16770175
Do this
QUICK I NEED ADVICE QUICK
There is this girl I want to ask out. But! I only see her once or twice a week, and neither of those times are good times. Was wondering if I should I friend her on facebook and ask her if she is free after class anytime. We are friends but don't know each other toooooo well but I think thats better for me so I'm not friendzoned. The next time I might possibly see her is Tuesday and I don't feel like waiting!
Good idea y/n n/y? Please thanks have a nice
day
Not "anytime." Pick a specific day. And tell her why you want to see her, like to meet for lunch or whatever.
you don't need this advice quick, why did you make me worry like that?
>>16769854
whoa that was quick
>>16769860
Well tomorrow is friday so I was hoping to be like "hey do you have a class tomorrow so I can show up and ask you out?"
It sounds smoother in my head.
>>16769862
It has to be done tonight!
Sorry to make you worry anon i know you have a weak heart
Break-up, or not?
I know that i should just sit and think about it, but it's too much for me. I've been thinking about it for a week now, and she wants to hear answer.
I'm with woman for 3,5 years now. She's greatest one when it comes to mentality, dreamed future wife- taking care of everything about you, cooking, giving head. The thing is that I'm young, and we are with each other since teenage years. My feelings burned out after maybe 3 years, I don't know if i can call it love or I'm just attached to her that much. I'm afraid...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
bump, help
>I've been thinking about it for a week now, and she wants to hear answer.
You broke up with her already?
>>16769974
Not really. We are in middle of the way.
I'm a bit depressed overall, I've got that feeling when I wanna cut myself atm
I've been feeling absolutely lifeless the past few months. Nothing brings me happiness anymore and while I go through the motions (college, shit job, etc), none of it brings me any satisfaction. I've been planning on hurting myself and others and I get to start therapy again soon but I am worried. Before I went for VA Disability, the only therapists I could see were civilian therapists. I had been to 7 but none of them made me feel any better and they gave me 7 different answers to the problem. Through the VA I get to see a therapist again soon but I'm worried,...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
Patient/Doctor privilege won't allow your therapist to reveal any information you tell them to anyone, unless you directly state you want to harm said person, in which case the therapist is entitled (but not required ) to tell only that person.
>>16769712
What if, in that case, it was not directed at any one particular person?
>>16769684
>I've been planning on hurting myself and others
You have to be honest about your thoughts. Look at it this way: better to spend a little time, if necessary, getting treatment in a hospital, then having your thoughts overwhelm you and cause harm to others, thereby ensuring a long jail sentence with no likelihood of therapeutic help.
How do I get someone from bothering me?
I befriended someone with many physical defects, medical problems, and special needs. She has a learning disability, a speech impediment, and metal in her spine. We got closer because we both work at the same place. After hanging out with her once, and assessing the situation, I confirmed she just made me uncomfortable and I didn't want to be friends anymore.
She tends to go full throttle, keeps pressing and prying with similar questions even after I've answered them to the best of my abilities. I can't really place it. Just makes me uncomfortable. The thing is, I am honest and quickly told her that I don't want to be friends anymore. When pressed about the matter I stated that she made me uncomfortable. When pressed even more I went into specifics.
Ignoring her isn't seeming to work, she just keeps messaging me. Help?
P.S: the best way I can express my discomfort is how animals can sense another member of their species is defective and avoid them. The same way animals are cast out or shunned from their peers.
I am shallow but that's besides the point. I just want to be separated from this autistic person.
>>16769627
Call her the fuck out. Easiest way to do it. You'll gain a hater, but from what you wrote it looks like you don't care. Easiest, most efficient way but requires alot of spine.
>>16769672
I actually did. It didn't work :( I wasn't that hard on her because I didn't want to hurt her. But she doesn't seem to get the point
My boyfriend is so messy. He leaves plastic bags full of trash next to our bed on his side. Even though he could just go to the kitchen and throw it out. He peed in like 10 bottles and hid them under the bed. They stink really bad so I know they've been there a while.
I've told him before to not be so messy and not leave pee bottles around.
What do now?
Threaten to take his tendies away if he doesn't shape up.
>>16769553
Was he abused as child?
Abused children do strange stuff with their piss and poo as either for attention or prevention.
Tell him to stop or you will leave him?
i got this female friend (not usually the type i would be friends with but she's my sister's bf's sister... yeah, complicated) who's very slutty.
she would actually be a really nice girl. she's beautiful and has a big hearth. but she got HUGE selfesteem issues which make her drive any guy away that shows even the slightest bit of interest beyond fucking her. she is obsessed with (cringe incoming) the chippendales. she is a hardcore "groupie" and has slept with a few of them. it's really embarassing. she only slept with them becase they...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
You can't just go and make other people into what you'd want them to be. While you can try to encourage someone to do something or support them, the basic ideas need to come from them. If you deeply disagree with someone's life choices, you'll have no other recourse but to deal with it or just not confront yourself with that person anymore.
>>16769604
i mean, i like her just the same. i just can see how she's slowly killing all her emotions and it makes me sad cause i know that's not what she wants. she just has no idea what's going on. but i guess it's really none of my business.
>>16769614
You really can't force her. Just be there for her and try to be supportive and constructive.
Ok guys it's been a long time here but I haven't asked for advice like now. Due to some horrible luck I ranbout of cash when I'm supposed to be going on a trip with my gf. I have tried to get loans anywhere now but my credit is screwed thanks to college still. How should I go about this or an I doing something wrong? I can't miss this with her or she'll prolly never forgive me. She's been in Russia for a year now. I don't wanna make a liar out of myself die to horrible luck.. Advice? Also I don't care about the outrageous interest atm...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
Bumping for desperation
Related
>>16770503
>inverted nipples
>corset
LEWD
save money before you start wasting it on emotional garbage
