Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1607. page
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What do I do if my mom is bipolar and has random moods where she just looks for any reason to piss me off? She has random nice moods where I can use her car to go to a store and shit. Other days I ask to use the car just down to the road and she just refuses for no reason. When she drinks she just randomly yells at me and says mean shit to me. I never know when she's going to be in one of her shit moods and it's like 75% of the time
That's not bipolar, idiot.
Gain financial independence, leave, never talk to her again.
It would be one thing if she was acting this way at 20, which would still be unacceptable, but maybe she could turn around, but the fact that she still acts this way to her own children, who are old enough to post on 4chan says to me that she is a lost cause and will probably never turn around.
My mom is the same way. Any disagreement with her, even about the slightest thing ends with her threatening to kick me out. There is absolutely no room for dialogue with her. There is no combination of words in the english language that can make her even consider anything I have ever proposed.
I met my girlfriend through mutual friends. The first time I met her she walks around topless around my friend’s house while 5-6 dudes ogled her and her more unattractive obese friend orbited her sphere of influence. Around a year and a half later after she’d been having fairly consistent hook ups with that group of friends and, according to her, vast amounts of casual sex. Then we went home together one night in February.
She works hard, she’s funny, has a great body and she’s confident as hell and that rubbed off on me in a really good way. I felt kind of “fixed” by her presence like I’d received a second wind for life.
We got together after a night out one occasion, got drunk, she cried about how hurt and sick of casual sex she was and the next morning we were boyfriend and girlfriend. Immediately we were out with her family seeing a film with her niece.
Her family liked me, her friends really liked me, and she loved me. It was quick but every major milestone in the relationship was undertaken under the influence of alcohol.
But when we speak it’s always about sex and “I love you and I miss you.” I feel like a passenger in the relationship sometimes. She always talked about “showing me off” to her friends, she keeps subtly bringing up children in a joking manner and she has planned for us to get a mortgage after our 3 years of university are up. Live together, do up a house, get married…
I feel suffocated. At the beginning I got uncomfortable about constantly running into ex-boyfriends. She had slept with every immediate friend I spent time with more or less, and in her own group of friends she has two ex-boyfriends and one unsightly fellow who she kissed out of pity one time. In fact she’s moving in with one of those ex-boyfriends in March with two others. I don't really know where I am. I'm happy with her but are my doubts silly?
>>16791074
You want to marry someone who's slept with your friends and moves in with her ex-boyfriend?
Dude...don't put the pussy on the pedestal. She's the town bicycle, not marriage material.
shittiest bait in a while.
>>16791074
>Dating the town bike
Lol
/ call me a pussy or what not, just need to know the next step. /
- 19 y.o
- Feelings for friend of 6 years.
- Fucked a couple of times.
- She lives roughly 200 kilometres away, not sure in miles, 130 miles roughly.
- Stays with her.
- Confesses feelings.
- Shit gets deep.
Here's the part I need advice for.
She tells me :
- She could very easily grow feelings for me.
- I'm not open enough, not full on enough, she wants someone to be "full on". (I don't understand)
Okay, so I'm more open with her than ANYONE. I tell her everything I believe is worth speaking.
I don't understand what she meant by full on, maybe super serious relationship?
She doesn't reply fast, I try not to send multiple messages because I don't want to seem desperate.
Being 2 hours drive away, and being close to homeless me, I can't be there every second day.
She has family where I live, we attended school together etc.
What is my next move Chan?
I'm stumped, confused and getting anxious over it all.
She wants you to be open and honest with her. Tell her your feelings when you're feeling them (don't bottle them up then explode).
In my experience, I had that bottling problem when I met my bf. He would get upset if I didn't tell him every little thing that bothered me. After awhile of wanting to please him, I changed, I started telling him everything all the time. This eventually led him to get an annoyed look, like "oh no, here comes the complaining." So now Ive resorted to pretending I'm happy about things when I'm really not to avoid that look.
My advice is don't over share because you might be seen as weak. Tell her important things.
You could be open right now by asking her to give you examples of what she means by "full on".
Read this bitch
So basically I'm studying this year in the UK, and so far it's been difficult to understand what a british girl is thinking when she's sober (obviously it's too easy when they're drunk), I would like to date/have fun with a british girl but I'm under the impression that they're not really open for that and most of them seem cold as fuck
Any tips would be welcome
>>16791056
Get bad teeth. The british love bad teeth.
>>16791067
Funny enough most girls I've seen here have good teeth, although mature women have some awful teeth
I always have phone sex with my LDR boyfriend, usually once every two days. Suddenly today I felt pretty grossed out half way. Why is this?
because thats not all natural and its your body telling you to stop
>>16791033
bc its phone sex, you dirty slut!
>>16791033
Because you weren't horny anymore. You realized who it was and got bored, the boredom killed your sex drive, and you became ashamed of yourself
That's just my guess though
Serious question - Is there a mail-order groom industry, similar to a mail-order bride industry but with the other sex?
>inb4 none
If not, you should start one.
Yes. Google it.
>>16791012
Not really. If you've got money and a pussy, some guy will certainly come and live with you while he has access to both, then leave when one or both isn't accessible anymore (or when he gets his green card).
So i have this new job i completed 3 weeks yesterday and since day one i saw this girl and she became a crush to me very quickly no a super model but really cute and somehow i cant get her out of my mind
So today i manage to get her full name and i try to get her facebook and i found it, first thing i noticed is that she used to be below average a few years back that was interesting and things get fuckd when i scroll to see her relationship status expecting to see a boyfriend and SHES MARRIED.
My mind is like "Okay shes married there's no fucking way you can have any chance with her so forget it" at the same time i'm like "who the fuck gets married at the age of 22" i look at her husband and the guy such a fucking below average fatty dude i just cant believe shes with such ugly piece of shit and started to have mixed feelings of happiness, frustration and sadness
Feeling happy because i have a reason to get her out of my mind but at the same time frustration that i CANT do anything to get her shes fucking married plus i get to see her every fucking day now knowing that i cant have that lady with me no matter what.
Help /adv/ what the fuck i do to go back to normal levels of stable happiness this sucks so fucking much, my life already sucks cock hardcore and this is killing me to the point my brain cant even thing of a right emotion for this situation.
firstly, grow a fucking pair you pussy, shes just a girl, talk to her
2. girls put married on fb all the time, even with friends, doesnt really mean shit
>>16791006
There's pictures of the wedding
I keep doubting myself - and it's not, "ohhh I'm so insecure". It's things that are obvious.
I'm just so damn immature compared to the ones in my life.
I keep telling myself I have a youthful heart, but really, I'm just a kid. People tell me not to do something, but I go play with fire, cry that I got burnt. I'm so naïve, I probably laugh too much, I'm the female equivalent of a man child when it comes with where I'm at in life (full time neet), I get caught up with the trivial things in life, I think I know everything when I barely have an life experience at all. I still have that 13 year old edgy angst... and I'm practically almost 21 years old.
It just astounds me that people have the patience to deal with my shit, when I don't have much going for me. At the same time, I also know I do have positive traits, but there's far less good than there is bad; I don't understand why people are so willing to help me, or want my company, when I'm just a fool, the village idiot.
I'm not asking for advice, I'm asking that if any of you anons do have pals that have the emotional maturity of a teenager, what makes you stick around? Where do you find the compassion to? I need to know, because it makes no sense.
>inb4 count your blessings
This is an advice board, after all, I think I'm entitled to being melodramatic.
>>16790987
Whether you think you're immature or not, your friends must simply enjoy being around you to put up with your bs. You must have more going for you than you're giving yourself credit for.
It sounds to me like you're having trouble growing and maturing in life because you have unrealistic expectations for adulthood. Two key points: don't try to have all the answers, and dedicate yourself to a career in which you find fulfilment and can see the real-life contributions you're making. If you sit in an office shuffling papers all day or work in a soulless environment such as sales or call centers, you're going to find it hard to take yourself and others seriously. Make things. Do things. Find a field where your achievements are real.
I know not many women are going into the field of carpentry these days, but I think you should give it some serious consideration.
>>16790993
Why carpeting?
If you buy an item on eBay, pay fast, don't create any problems and leave positive feedback to the seller when the item is delivered, what are the chances of you receiving positive feedback in return?
If its a professional seller close to 100% I'd say.
Some of them already give you good feedback before you write your review.
>>16790952
Basically what the other guy said. Unless a product is defective or the buyer took an unusually long amount of time to pay both will get a 100% rating
How the fuck do you approach the situation of I think my mates been texting my girlfriend?
I saw him browsing his phone and saw something that looked like her whatsapp picture and being rather suspicious with his phone around me and it's fucking annoying. I just don't know how to approach the situation.
Advice?
Check their profiles, see if they are friends or some shit on facebook or whatever they use.
If it's just through whatsapp then try to sneak a peek at your girls phone. If you can't achieve this, then often make comments about your girlfriend/friend to your friend/girlfriend. Offhanded things. To your friend "I'm gonna go see my girlfriend later" Then go fuck off and watch your girlfriend reaction when she returns if your friend is talking to her he will tell her what you said and she would be confused as shit.
I guess that's just to find out really.
If you are bothered that they talk, or want to know what they are talking about, you'l have to cross bigger lines than how fucked up what i just said was.
I'd say ask your girlfriend about it, like "Are you friends with __? " if she says yes then fine, if she says no then ask your friend if he's good friends with __
Update me OP if my advice worked, I'm interested
>>16790928
Beat his ass. If he fight back he is talking to yo grill, if he dont punch back, it means he a bitch ass and he is not texting her
I'm afraid of physical intimacy
I'm 24. I've been told I'm decently attractive. I have a good job. But the thing is that I've never been in a relationship and the first time I ever kissed a girl was 6 months ago.
I like women. I get sexual urges. But I get antsy on dates because I'm worried that if things get serious we will have to be physically intimate. I think I'm ultimately afraid of my own inexperience. It sounds stupid but I think that at 24 I'm expected to have this stuff down but if it comes down to it, the girl will know I'm an awful kisser etc.
What do I do about this? Is there anything I can do? And don't say hooker.
Hey /adv/, I need some help deciding where to go to college. I've currently got a few options, and I'm wondering what you all think is the best idea:
1. Go to a top 40 public college in state for around $10k/year
2. Go to a top 150 public college out of state with a scholarship that waives all tuition and mandatory fees and pays me around $11k for housing and whatever else I need
3. Go to an easy meme school out of state for a currently undetermined amount (<$10k/year, though) which a friend attends
4. Go to an international school with little to no expected expenses
5. Some other great idea I'm sure you'll have
Basically, I'm wondering how true the "a degree is a degree" meme is. If it matters, I'll be going into STEM.
>>16790907
>> I'll be going into STEM
And another one bites the dust.
>>16790912
Probably, but it's the only subject area which I can even tolerate. I'd definitely kill myself if I tried to do anything else.
>>16790920
You seem set on college, but with no idea beyond that - suggesting that attending university is a matter of inertia for you as the "logical" thing to do after high school.
If you're not enthused by studying in any particular context, you're unlikely to find that field's work life any more appealing, so you're setting yourself up for a lifetime of unfulfilment punching the clock in a job you hate.
Try thinking about other career options. These days white collar workers face high stress, not great pay considering the hours worked, and the permanent threat of outsourcing. If you develop skills in a physical trade such as carpentry or woodwork, you'll probably end up making more money in a much less stressful and more congenial workplace environment, in a sector where employers are desperate to find workers and job security is sure to remain high for the whole of your career.
TLDR: My cousin is going to start dating a rapist soon and I'm the only one who knows.
The girl my cousin has been talking with recently revealed she's raped her ex's sister out of anger over their breakup. That implies shes a control freak with anger issues. Shes mentioned before that she has bad anger problems too. She wouldnt tell why her ex dumped her either.
Unfortunately shes near perfect. Aside from her 2 flaws mentioned above, Shes a qt, smart/creative and has 2 pretty good jobs and she would be his first gf so a part of me doesn't want to tell him to report her ass. He asked me for advice on the situation given what we know about her but I dont know what to say anymore.. Everyone that I know of that has been rape is emotionally destroyed. Id like to assume that the victim is ok but I'm not naive and pussy wiped.
I dont want to leave him hanging but I also dont want to be around when she goes rouge on him.
>>16790897
Forgot to ask
WHAT
DO
I'm sure the whole raping and anger issues are just her past and probably just a phase. Shes's over it already so don't be a dick.
:^)
>recently revealed she's raped her ex's sister out of anger over their breakup
This is a serious allegation. She actually told your cousin that she raped someone and he's asking you what to do? Report her.
>shes near perfect so a part of me doesn't want to tell him to report her ass
She's hot, so you're reluctant to deal with her rape allegation? Are you 15? You and your cousin sound like fucking idiots. She confessed to a revenge rape! Why would you want anything to do with her?
Why is this considered common in relationships? (included in my own) any advice on how to put an end to this without breaking up?
>>16798632
You can't.
Dump her. Find someone more like you. Fuck. Marry. Breed. Divorce. Bankruptcy. Die.
>>16798632
If a girl has lots of guy friends and no girl friends, it means she's not girlfriend material.
There's a serious problem if the only people who want to talk to you are people who also want to fuck you. It means her personality is shit and she enjoys the attention and will likely cheat.
If she's hounding you over this, just dump her ass already.
>>16798632
There is no way to reasonably discuss this issue with a woman. She wants you secured while she has backups in case the relationship goes sour. Either you keep your female friends on the low or you break up with her and find someone who is willing to let you have those friends.
So i just had my partner of 8 years propose to me, I love him but he hasn't had a job basically the whole 8 years we have been together. I know i must sound stupid i mean if i love him i should stay with him right ? I just feel like im going to be supporting him financially for the rest of my life. What should i do ?
>>16790896
Talk to him about it.
Why the fuck hasn't he worked for eight years? What has he been doing?
>>16790896
If your partner is a lazy ass it is up to you. Support him financially or dump him.
he has been looking for work apparently but i feel like hes always applying for jobs he knows he can't get and when i try to suggest a job he should apply for he says im treating him like a baby and that he looks for enough jobs as it. i mean i think hes kinda depressed from getting rejections from jobs at the same time.
