Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1527. page
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I am obsessed and I mean obsessed with Norse Mythology, and also dragons, I would like to name my son to be something that exemplifies both of those things so I'm seriously considering naming my son Nidhogg. I know it's an unusual name but it is name nonetheless used in Germany and I just wanted to get /adv/'s feedback on it or if /adv/ has any better names that shout Norse/Germanic mythology and dragons?
Name him Norse Dragon
>>16837693
puff the magic dragon
>>16837703
"Norse" is actually a cool chadly name
"Nidhogg" is the name of somebody who's going to have to bang a hooker or a fatty to lose his virginity.
Summoning everyone from the last thread, this thread will be more focused on specific methods of getting girls' attention and playing on their natural emotions rather than questioning why they think the way they do to begin with.
Continuing from here:
"Have you tried joining some clubs?
I am a part of several clubs on campus and I actually met my last boyfriend in ukulele club.
Identify some things that you're interested in, and sign up for the clubs related to them when there are club fairs.
Meeting girls in clubs is usually pretty easy because you both already have something in common, and you can ask questions about the activity without coming on too strong because it seems like genuine interest+passion for the activity.
My last BF approached me by complimenting my ukulele and asking me some questions about how long I'd been playing and which songs I knew and stuff. Then he suggested we play a song together, and it sounded so good that we almost instantly fell for eachother.
Say you like video games- join the video game club and challenge some chick to a match. Chat her up about what kinds of games she's into, and if you guys seem to be jelling well, as a time to meet up again and hang out (I.E.: hey, me and some buddies get together to play smash every Thursday. Wanna join in? We could always use another player) then you can ask for her phone number of five you her's and tell her to text you so that you can let her know when/where to meet up with the gang.
It's usually a good idea to try to hang out in groups with girls at first/if you're inviting them to something.
A lot of girls have a kind of knee-jerk reaction to shy away from direct advances. I know that even if I think a guy is cute, I try to create space between us if I feel that he's being too foreword.
Once you gain her friendship as someone who she trusts, she'll be more comfortable hanging out with you alone, and if she finds you physically attractive, she'll develop a crush on you."
I need more tips on getting girls' phone number to begin with, I had read material that said that you needed to be as direct as possible because it would show a lack of neediness which would make them more attracted, but from my own experiences this never worked.
Also when is a good time to ask a girl that you've selected out of a group to finally go out with you just the two of you? And what's a good way to do it?
>>16841558
Hi, I'm that one girl from the other thread.
Honestly I don't like boys who approach things very boldly. I don't see that as real confidence- I see that as a "fake it till you make it" or PUA tactic. I like getting to know a boy as friends and then learning his character by observing his actions.
I think that "be bold" advice is more intended to help guys so that they don't waste time following after a girl who isn't interested in them sexually, since a lot of people can tell right away whether or not they're attracted to the other person.
But I've never gone out with someone who's just approached me out of the blue. It makes me uncomfortable. It's one thing if they chat me up for a while and I get to know them (like in the club example) but if a guy just thinks I'm pretty and wants to meet up later, that's kind of a red flag for me because he doesn't know ME, he's just seen my body/face and likes it.
Make a move after you've had some casual 1 on 1 hangouts with her. The way people act when they're alone with you is a lot different than they act in a group.
If the solo interaction is awkward, it's not gonna work. Even when the two of you are alone you should be able to bounce off of eachother and have funny conversations. You'll know when you "click" with someone.
A lot of guys are terrified of the friend zone, but the friend zone is basically just "I think you're awesome and I love everything about you except you don't arouse me sexually."
But you can't "mess up" by being friends with someone first. If they reject you once you're friends, they sure as hell would have rejected you before you were friends.
And a lot of girls (like me) will only date guys who we've been friends with first.
I usually do a big group hangout, an small group hangout, and then an individual hangout. I know by then if I feel comfortable enough/attracted to the person enough to date them.
(C)
>>16841600
(C)
Things also don't normally progress that formulaically. Like sometimes you'll kiss someone before you technically date them, and that leads to you dating then.
Watching a movie in your dorm room at night is a good way to get a feel for whether or not there is attraction. Pull the movie up on a laptop and sit right next to her with some pillows to lay back on and a blanket. See how close she gets to you during the movie. Is she leaning up on you? Does she "fall asleep" and rest her head on your shoulder? Those are signs that she's attracted to you. PROTIP: IF SHE FALLS ASLEEP DO NOT TOUCH HER BOOBS AND VAGINA that is creepy and will ruin your chances.
To get to the 1 on 1 hangout- do something super casual like text her "hey wanna get lunch? Im done with class!" Or bring up naturally in conversation something like "have you tried the new _____ restaurant? It's so good!" And if she says "no I haven't yet!" Be like "OMG you need to try it! We should go some day after classes so you can try their _____. I promise you're gonna love it!" ^ similar things can be done with movies "you haven't seen dead pool yet? Omg you have to let me take you! It was the best movie I've seen all year!"
For this initial hangout you dot want her to classify it as a "date" so while you CAN pay for her food/movie, you don't necessarily have to offer.
Hey /adv/, I'm currently living with my long term boyfriend of 4 years and things, asides from a few arguments, are generally good.
The problem is that I'm in my late 20s and I want kids. More specifically, I want white kids. I've realized as I've become older that I'm not really comfortable with having mixed children. I'd prefer to have white children, and I've seen too many mixed kids who identify primarily with their non-white father to the point they grow up to dislike white people.
What's a good way to deal with this situation? What should I tell him? He's Asian.
girls are seriously the fucking worst
just tell him what you told me, a total stranger on the internet
now go be a faggot somewhere else
>>16842187
Your kids will look white.
This woman, for example, is half Asian.
As the mother, they will look more like you.
Talk about it. You might break up over this, but there's a chance you won't and he'll be okay with donated sperm. That's really the only way.
How do I stop developing a crush on every single guy who expresses the slightest amount of care or concern about me?
this is a legit problem.
date one of them and learn from it
This is almost identical to the line that Jim Carrey says in Eternal Sunshine.
Are you pulling a fast one on me?
I'm a single father and I have a 6 year old son. I've been dating this girl for 2 years. She's had little involvement with my son, on purpose. I didn't want to shoehorn her into my son's life until I thought something serious was there. About a month ago I started letting her come over to my house and in turn allowed her to be around my son because I thought she seemed suitable enough to be around him.
Last weekend she was over at my house and everything was fine. Unfortunately I had gotten a call from work that some shit was happening and I needed to come down. I didn't have time to book a babysitter or anything so I asked my girlfriend if she would look after my son for 2-3 hours while I dealt with this. I have never asked her to look after my kid before but I trusted her enough to look after him for a couple hours.
I did what I had to do and came home and my son comes up to me in tears and he tells me that my girlfriend hurt him. I talked to her and asked her what happened.
My son is a hyper kid, he's a little boy so he's rough. That comes with the territory. My girlfriend told me he was misbehaving and not listening to her at all and making a mess so she beat him with a belt.
I was extremely angry and upset. Whether you believe in that sort of discipline or not, I didn't give her permission to discipline my child. I sure as hell didn't give her permission to hit him. She didn't call me or anything, she took matters in her hands.
I yelled at her and told her that was unacceptable and she overstepped her boundaries by a fucking mile. She started crying and saying she was sorry but she didn't know what else to do and I told her to get out and not call me anymore.
She's obviously been trying to call me and she wants a second chance and she promises she won't do it again. I admit maybe I let the anger get the best of me but I feel like she went too far, unforgivably so.
Am I just being too overprotective or am I right in feeling she stepped too far?
The issue isn't if you can forgive her, but can your son forgive her.
Please don't underestimate the psychological impact it could have on your son. Notice how she's sorry because you got angry, not because she believes she did something wrong. She didn't tell you, your son did. She's not sorry to your son.
Please don't make him stay or spend time with someone who he is afraid of and who is willing to physically hurt him.
Incredibly fair. It's probably even damaging to your child to have her around now. As harsh as that seems. A child has to be able to feel safe in their own home. How can they do that if they have violence like that. It will probably harm the trust of future women too. But the best thing I see is to convince your child that he comes first, always. It's possible to leave it up to your son if she should stay or not. But I don't know if that's such a good idea. Depends on how your son is. Personally I suspect my daughter would prefer to have me chose the choice she prefers for her. But I don't know your son. It could be he prefers to be active in 'solving' the situation.
It's a choice between your son and her the way I see it. You will often find that people in studies turn out ALOT worse after child abuse. I don't know specifically what the cause is, was the damage done right now? But I wouldn't risk my daughter like that either way. It would absolutely ruin trust to keep someone violent against her around. Sorry.
girls: what non-malicious, pathetic action by a boyfriend would make you dump him immediately?
Being on they goddamned cell phone while they at a bar. Truly pathetic.
>>16836566
Showing any emotion whatsoever that wasn't anger or jealousy or happiness.
>>16836566
My ex-boyfriend has a weird relationship with his best friend.
hey /adv/ got another relationshit thread
my friend and i are into each other but we're not a couple. that being said, we both have terrible depression, to the point of being unable to function at times. Has anyone dealt with this scenario or a similar scenario?
I'm wondering how I can best help her when she's having a really terrible period.
it's like this with my gf and i of 11 months but i'm way worse than her
sometimes she makes me feel better but sometimes i wear her out
>>16834221
hmm what do you two do for each other?
my friend is beginning to wear me out right now, and i dont know how long i can put up with her stubbornness and refusal to change, but i also realize that a big part of that is depression. we're also in a point where she's been consistenly not very good for almost two months, whereas i've been pretty okay.
sadly, when i have a shitty time she isn't of much use, even telling me things like "i can't offer you any comfort right now" which i understand is because she feels like shit, but idk
she is very far away at the moment, and i realize the distance does make it difficult
>>16834218
you two said you cannot function. ergo you cannot date. it doesnt matter if its intermittent.
you two have decided that this modern life is somehow so soul crushing that its not worth being real human beings. i say the same thing about 13 years olds. they shouldnt date. they arent ready. they act like a break up is the end of the world. now you two are going into this like you're already in that horribly depressed break up phase. you dont care enough about yourselves to take care of yourselves, one wrong rubbing of the way and you will hurt one another, all because you are too self absorbed to truly care about each other.
TL;DR depressed people cannot date.
I am a white guy working retail. The store hired a couple new employees last week, one of which was a black girl. I was assigned to train the other new hire. During the second day of this process, we were setting up the store before it opened. A shelf broke and we didn't currently have the parts necessary to fix it. I explained to her that sometimes you would have to ghetto rig stuff to make things work until a better fix was available, as I showed her where the tools were and made a makeshift pin to hold the shelf in place using a paperclip.
The other new hire overheard this. She didn't say anything to me at the time, but later the manager on duty approached me and said that she'd told him that I said "ghetto rig" and she thought that was racist. I got the impression he didn't think it was as big of a deal as she was making it out to be, and we both seemed to be in a hurry to get our work done before the store opened.
Comment too long and here's a picture of a creepy thing because why not.
>>16840421
There wasn't an official write-up or anything over it, but I didn't want to offend anybody and it obviously meant a lot to this girl if she reported it to the manager. It seemed strange to me, because a couple of the other employees then and the day before were black, one of whom is a friend and drinking buddy of mine, and she had seen all of us joking around and having a good time together. Still, the next time I came across her, I apologized. I told her I'd heard she was upset by what I said, that I honestly didn't consider the fact that the term could be offensive, but now that I knew I was sorry and wouldn't say it again. She barely acknowledged that I was speaking to her and walked off, and remained cold and dismissive of me from then on.
Yesterday she quit, and told the store manager (above the manager she had reported me to) that she was leaving because there were too many racists in the store. She named me and the manager she had reported me to as two racists, but refused to elaborate on what we had said or done to make her feel that way. He asked me if I had made any racist comments or jokes, and I explained all of the above to him, including exactly what I said and my apology. He wrote some things down, said something about needing to send something about this to the regional manager, and that he might want to talk to me, that there might be some racial sensitivity training or some other consequences, he wasn't sure but he'd know by the next time I worked, which will be tomorrow.
What the fuck.
>>16840430
Girl sounds like a mess, hiding behind "muh racism"
You did nothing wrong, literally.
1) used a term that you had no idea was racist, given your black co-workers regularly use it and you use it with them
2) following her upset, apologised and promised to be more sensitive
She's got a huge rod up her ass.
Here's a secret for you:
A lot of black people are incredibly sensitive about racial issues, and look for racism where there is literally none.
I've been called racist for not shaking hands with a black guy who had leprosy and holes in his clothing (a fucking bum).
Don't stress about it.
Am I paranoid to automatically worry about a male friend being interested in me, or stupid to not expect it?
I've never had male friends and I don't know how to function around men who aren't planning to have sex with me.
>male friend
>thinks he isn't planning sex eventually
>>16839901
You have to consider the fact that I am kind of ugly and he's not.
>>16839904
>self esteem issues
>thinking the hot guy isn't going to use you
Am I racist against black people if I share this on Facebook?
What's your intention on sharing it to begin with?
>>16838109
>newnation.org
Yeah lol
>>16838109
>dangers of interracial dating.
By posting that you imply that you believe people shouldn't date across the races and if they do the black men will murder the white women.
If that is the point you want to make the go for it.
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't. Our answers are not going to help you.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking
>Brandon and frog posters
Fuck off
Old Thread: >>16833512
This gon seem weird, but like I got a job in animal research.
Is that super creepy to say? I mean, how long can you avoid saying what job you have?
Would a woman consider dating a guy whose been single for more than 3 years?
is being 6 feet and 170 lbs to fat?
So I've been hanging out with this guy for a little over a month.
When we were together on Thursday I saw three different girls text/snapchat him. Before I left, I asked him if he was talking to any other girls besides me and told him I wouldn't be mad if he was since we aren't dating. Of course he said he wasn't.
Since then we've barely talked. Did I fuck everything up?
Tell me your problems and I will tell you the solutions.
>>16830291
I need help, I can't see the taste of cinnamon toast crunch
Low selfesteem?
>>16830298
Easy. You need a cereal without flavor like the healthy cheerios and a microscope. Comparing the cheerios and the cinnamon toast crunch will allow you to see the taste of cinnamon toast crunch.
>>16830301
Easy. Make a goal with lots of intermediate steps and stay disciplined. Avoid something that can be broken by outside influences like sleep schedules. I recommend going for a run every day of a certain distance or doing pushups. As time goes on and you stick to your goal, your self esteem will go up.
I'm no 9/10 chad thundercock with a chiseled face and a 6 pack, but I'm not the male equivalent of these sad fucks that seem to be the only ones that are responsive to me either.
I think I'm a 7/10 and with an even better haircut, and losing even more weight and putting on muscle I could reach 8/10 easy
But yet the only girls who seem to be receptive are 5/10s and below
I don't like this, either they are super pretty or they are like a trainwreck to look at dichotomy, where are all the "pretty good" girls?
well for one thing, you rank people and assign them a number so you're already a shallow douche.
girls can afford to be picky, so your looks aren't going to seal the deal
you gotta be a person people want to hang out with
>>16828650
No some of these girls are literally difficult to look at.
>>16828652
It's easy to feel that way when talking to girls in person like I've done a lot, and when talking to them over facebook, but the best way to test to see how they interpret you on a purely physical level is to get on tinder (which I don't even use anymore)
Literally all of my matches were always the 5/10s and below
Never got anything higher
And when I talk to girls on facebook, the ones who are receptive kinda fall into that range, and the ones that are higher, even when I know they are single and they are laughing and seeming to like me, when I ask to go to X place with them sometime soon and they back out
It's weird, I don't know what's going on
Me and my gf want to get an apartment and we want to get something with a roommate for cheap. The problem is I don't want a guy roommate and she doesn't want a girl roommate.
I told her guys are way worse but she won't believe me. Guys are the most likely to get drunk or something and harass a women for sex or God forbid a rape or something. It's just too sketchy. I told her we could just find a fat ugly girl or something like girls don't even really try to fuck guys that badly the most they do is just give you a look across a room but a guy will literally try putting his hands down a girls pants and shit like that
How about you aim for someone that's nice? I don't buy that view of guys. I also don't buy the idea that girls are much better.
>>16838983
You're making all men sound like rapists. Chill bro. We understand the reasons, guys are the initiators in chancing things, you don't want a guy flatmate for that reason, but your girlfriend feels the exact same way in terms of a girl trying to seduce you. If you both don't want a third party in the middle of your relationship, you're going to have to either not move out, or move out together with no one else, because this sort of debate doesn't end well for either party, and moving into a house already feeling at unease at such things is going to put a massive strain on your relationship.
>>16838983
Believe it or not, man, not everybody is that desperate to fuck your girlfriend. No matter how hot she is. If you can find someone with basic intelligence and social skills, he will understand that it's not a great idea to sign a lease on an apartment and then start trying to fuck his female roommate who is attached to his male roommate.
Don't you have any friends? Why does it have to be a total stranger/potential rapist? And why the fuck are BOTH of you so irrationally jealous of hypothetical roommates that don't even exist yet? If cheating is such a huge concern it might not be a great idea to move in together just yet
You,
Please keep your head up. Everything will be fine. I promise.
Much love,
- Me
L,
Please stop running in my head
H
i'm sorry, i know I'm just gonna fuck us up in the long term anyway so i dont know why you bother. i'm way too much of a mess cause of you, if you knew what was best for you you'd message me now saying 'we shouldnt be friends'. or maybe this is me sabotaging myself. i get moody for seemingly no reason, but its cause i care about you too much. too much for my own good. everything is my fault. i hope you dont feel bad
I've taken to hitting myself in the legs, it's better than punching a hole in the wall. But now I have bruises.
