Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 999. page
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Why do I turn into a fuckin' retard every time I am near a girl I consider cute? I am all but a smooth talker but I have no problem holding a piece of conversation with
>men
>girls I consider ugly/average/insanely hot
but holy fuck every time I have to talk to a really, truly cute girl, I immediately turn into a spastic 10yo with autism.
I long ago accepted the fact that I would never had another relationship, so why in the fuck should I be scared of talking to a cute girl?
Pls help
>>17010726
Because your subconscious suddenly says
>OH SHIT it's a potential mate
>don't you dare fuck this up anon!
>Don't fucking do X! OR Y! OR Z!
Kind of like when you're trying to write a letter with someone staring over your shoulder, or when you're fapping at your desk and suddenly the boss walks in
>>17010726
>I long ago accepted the fact that I would never had another relationship, so why in the fuck should I be scared of talking to a cute girl?
It doesn't matter if the rational part of your brain has accepted it if the rest hasn't.
Of course, your next question might be "How do i get my subconscious to accept that i don't deserve a girlfriend (or friends) and should die alone?": you're better off not knowing the answer to that. Trust me on this one.
>>17011057
Everyone dies alone anon. Your mate will not die with you.
Going out on a green field camp for a weekend soon with Cadets any advice on what equipment and extras should I should I take with me ?
>>17010700
Bandaids for the inevitable blisters
Thank will do any thing else I might need ?
Toilet paper, or some kind of wet wipes that are large enough to wipe your ass.
I got myself in the middle of something and I'm not sure what to do, or what I can do. It's a long story to explain but for more than 2 years I've been with a Schizophrenic girl. I love her very much and she loves me. She used to live in a psych ward and all that but has been better, she takes antipsychotics and antidepressants and although she has her bad moments, or her oddities, she can function in society most of the time. I've gotten a lot of shit for being with her over the years, being told I'm a sick fuck for taking advantage of the mentally ill but brushed it off since I never forced myself on her and she was pretty stable, I thought of myself as the reason she was doing well mentally. But recently things have gone south. She's been having a lot more psychotic episodes, her delusions are stronger, and she could have died in a suicide attempt about 2 months back. I'm now feeling like I failed her, and am having second guesses if I'm helping at this point. I would never cheat but she's the jealous, obsessive kind, and she is constantly worrying about our relationship and her self worth. I'm wondering if our relationship is dragging her down and if she might be more stable if she didn't have to worry about it, so I was thinking of breaking up...then I quickly realized that would make things simply worse. I'm not sure what to do, what I can do, or if I actually am taking advantage of a mentally ill girl for love. What do I do in these hard times for her?
>>17010684
leave immediately.
not worth it, she will always be that way. I have family like this and I can't get away. You have choice so fucking run
>>17010690
I fear if I leave she'll kill herself, or at least be emotionally crushed. Also I do love her I'm just wondering what will be best for HER in the long run. I've been thinking if I broke up with her, that maybe after a while she might get over it and the stress of not being in a relationship may be good for her, but maybe her being alone will hurt even more. I don't know, I'm so confused on what to do and don't want to hurt anyone
>>17010704
People in her state have manic depression.
This is basically one of many emotions in a mood swing. They will say and do things they don't mean.
Even if she did kill herself it wouldn't be your fault, her conditions would've made that outcome more than likely for her.
Think of yourself man. If you give years or even your life to this woman you will end up resenting her in the long run for the times she tear away at your emotional spirit.
A person like this will not just say harsh things, but will also do harsh things. She's not even beyond committing crimes or cheating on you.
Look out for numero uno my friend
Ahhh I need help from normal people. I just wantto have some1 to talk to, even online chat is fine but thing is im so retarded that i can't even get conversation going on websites like omegle...help me how do u guys start convos there?what other websites/apps do u recommend?
so, what do you hope to gain out of online conversations?
>>17010644
>normal people
>>17010655
As I said, just talking to a human being is fine for now..
How do you guys deal with all your regrets in life? God they keep me up every night, I seem to wrestle with more and more every day and I'm only in my late twenties. Girls and opportunities I passed up for the stupidest, most awkward reasons, never joining the military, never applying myself towards anything past graduating high school, never sticking with or really learning anything. I feel like it's too late to change, like I'm caring less every day about changing it. How do you all do it? I'm running out of strength, I can't cope forever knowing how many great things I've never done, but could have.
it's quite simple... I just let it go.
It requires practice.
>>17010647
I've always been great at letting wrongs against me, or things out of my control go. It's when I know how little direction I ever had, how much better I could have done, how much harder I could have tried, that really eats me.
>>17010658
You can't be sure that if you had done those things something wouldn't have gone terribly wrong. You may have ended up better off by not doing them.
What would it look like? I'm curious, anon!
Mine would look a bit like this:
>take our time to get to know each other
>have loads in common, especially shared values
>have a lot of sexual tension
>same humour
>go traveling together a lot and have the same kind of "traveling style"
>miss each the other a lot when not together but can also go without contact/seeing each other for a while (lets say about 24h of no contact, 2-3 weeks without meeting) with no problems and drama
>down to show (appropriate) PDA
>have honest and open communication, down to show vulnerability
>same life goals
>emotionally available
>no exes lurking around
There's a lot more, but now lets hear yours!
>have things in common
>understand each other
>no lying, judging, cheating, scheming, etc
that's it, that's already way off into the realm of fantasy
Pretty much the same as yours, to be honest. Though wouldn't care about the life-goals thing, I'm pretty flexible when it comes to that stuff. Also wouldn't care about the sexual tension since I'm somewhat asexual, so I'd rather have her be sorta asexual too.
>see gf every 2-3 days
>only for sex
>No communication that exceeds 2 sentences.
>Sleeps over after said sex and leaves in the morning unless told otherwise.
>Occasional "going out to X" date followed by sex at my place to show that she is appreciated
Pretty much what I have now. Casual and cool all my needs are satisfied and no overthinking shit.
Anybody have a weapon or tool by their bed at night? I'm talking strictly for self defence purposes here.
Am I paranoid for wanting a self defence weapon by the bed?
I have pic related on my bedstand. It's actually my outdoor knive, but it can't hurt (me) to keep it near.
>>17010613
>Am I paranoid for wanting a self defence weapon by the bed?
Probably. But I don't know where you live--is there a significant home invasion problem in your neighborhood?
Personally can't understand people who feel the need to carry weapons at all, and I live in a reasonably high-crime area. Weapons are frequently turned on those who bear them, and self-defense doesn't guarantee immunity from prosecution if you go overboard and kill or seriously injure someone. But people's mileage clearly varies.
In most of the Western world the odds of someone breaking into your home while you are in it is fairly low.
There are more than enough houses with gaping security flaws and minimal risk that someone isn't going to kick your door down at 3 am to try and steal your playstation in the hopes you'll be so paralyzed with fear that you won't call the police.
Keeping a weapon beside your bed is especially paranoid and dangerous if you live with other people. I get wanting a weapon to feel safe, but you can easily keep a bat near your bedroom.
You don't need anything more than a bat either. A knife is just stupid. If you're not trained in knife combat and unless you have a lot of balls (plunging a knife into someone isn't a simple task) you're not going to be able to defend yourself with.
Anyone can swing a bat though.
To anyone seriously considering buying a weapon for home defense, you do have to ask whether they've bothered to put in basic security measures like a good lock, contact with their neighbors, leaving valuables out of sight and out of easy reach, and perhaps an outside light.
I'm a pretty kinky guy, and a furry at that. sometimes I really resent it. Most people I know from those scenes don't seem to relate to this resentment at all; they feel like since what they're into doesn't harm anyone, they have no reason to abstain. I've heard of sociological theories that purport that living in a way contrary to the norm makes you depressed. Maybe there's some truth to that. I wonder if I should behave in a more "normal" way, then, even if it's not how I feel I am or what I want to do.
In short, is "degeneracy" a real thing, and should it be avoided?
Or broader, should you be who you are or who you wish you were?
Degeneracy is restrain and is made up. Be yourself and don't be afraid.
bump again
Let your freak flag fly desu.
It might be challenging to find people to assist you with that, but they are certainly out there, and in surprisingly great numbers.
/adv/ I need help. Not a virgin but i'd like to learn how to eat pussy properly. My girl (who I've yet to have sex with but we're talking about doing it tomorrow) says that I "shouldn't feel bad if I can't make her cum" because its been difficult for her in the past. I see this as a challenge to give her the best orgasm she's ever had.
Apparently its the best way to not only turn a girl on, but to make her cum as well. And I want all your tips. Videos, websites, anything that can help me. I'm gonna study this shit. Pic unrelated
>>17010497
I don't think it's really about tips and tricks. You should learn to listen to the suggestions her body gives you, and that gets exponentially easier if you actually care about her satisfaction. So if you already do, you should not have any issues. Be patient, enjoy the reactions you'll get, take your time.
>>17010497
Focus on the clit. Try various approaches (side to side, up and down, circular) and speeds/rhythms to see what works best. Rhythm is most important - once you've found what works keep it up at the same speed.
Advanced students only - try sucking on it.
>>17010583
>>17010577
Almost forgot about the rhythm! Then again, if you listen and observe, she'll typically start moving in sync with you when you hit the right frequency.
I want to get a BA in audio production.
>My older brothers friend dropped out for whatever reason, took the same course
>My brothers friend said the employment rate after is like 15%
>Expensive af
Coming from a highschool student who literally just talked with a representative of the college and was convinced that this is where I should go because he was so nice, and that it shouldn't be about the money
>>17010435
Why do you need to go to an art school to become my barista at the end of the day?
>>17010456
I won't i'll become famous af yo
all jokes aside, it'd be a great way to show off.
just kidding, i just don't want to be in debt for the rest of my life so i want to goto an art school where it actually counts
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><Random insecurity>
Some do, some don't. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out. This is something we cannot explain to you. You either have learned to intuit this or you have not. If you have not, the only way to learn is experience--there are no shortcuts. So it comes back to: Just ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships.
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking.
>Brandon
Fuck off
Old Thread: >>17004423
Guy here: Am I obsolete to the society if I despise casual sex, one night stands and hookup culture? Is love just a meme?
Girls, why are you so delicious? Why do you make me so horny?
>>17010346
I would also like to know the answer to this
I need to change my outlook, but how?
I have noticed that I am uninterested and emotionally disconnected with all women regarding thoughts of perusing life long partnership/marriage. Almost all of them annoy me in fact. I am not bisexual and have plenty of attraction towards them, but no interest in their person. its gets as bad me sometimes viewing them as if they were just objects.
I do hope to one day have a successful relationship with one that could end in partnership/marriage but I can't seem to get emotionally connected to any of them. Anything I might be able to do /adv/?
>>17010331
you are an heteropatriarchal paraethnic ableist panromantic male, you'llbe fine
You're a faggot. "Girls are icky" grow the fuck up and stop hanging around stupid bitches.
>>17010405
I see your point but I don't know if it were as simple as "girls are icky". A while back I had a gf. We were very engaged with one another but I never was able to care all to muchand we broke up after a short while. I guess I just find my mentality odd.
How can I acquire a clingy, needy, insecure qt girlfriend who is obsessed with me?
I think these types of girls who need to be reassured are so cute.
>tfw no clingy qt gf that will cuddle me for hours after a stressful day
>tfw no clingy qt gf that will kiss me with such passion
>tfw no clingy qt gf that will fall asleep in my arms
>tfw no clingy qt gf to reassure that I love her every day
Would also like to know too. Sick of basic sluts that leave as soon as the going gets tough, or straight out cheating while lying about everything.
>>17010369
>>17010330
Take it from me you dont want an insecure clingy girl because they want all your time and will go to great lengths to get it. I mean they dont really want you just you are willing to feed their ego. After they dont get 110% of it they will look around and they'll try to blame you for it
Her dad was out of her life by middle school or before.
Long sleeves to hide self harm scars. Says things like "I don't want people to think I'm a slut"
Howdy /adv?, how are we all? Got a weird one kinda. So here we go:
>Girlfriend of 2 1/2 years
>Both in our 30's
>She is still a virgin(Saving it for marriage type)
>Not super interested in sexy things
>Kinda fine with that but still feel I need more
>She has been away for about 2 weeks( Vacation)
>Think of kinky things but realize they will most likely never happen.
>Wonder to myself "Is this normal?"
>>17010316
No, not really.
You should cheat on her or just outright break up with her.
>>17010316
>Wonder to myself "Is this normal?"
Did you know that this is was how it was going down when you first started seeing each other?
>>17010316
>away on 2 weeks for vacation
Sorry OP, you're being cucked.
Welp. Just found out girl is 16. I'm 18, graduated highschool last year. This means she's a junior. Does anybody have any experience with dating at different parts of life like this? I know it's all relative to the person youre dating, how mature they are and whatnot. But any general advice? Should I pursue this chick and take her out on a date?
>>17010285
You probably have the same maturity level, so it should be fine.
>>17010285
She is definitely into you
>>17010285
you are a pedo
reported to fbi
