Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 771. page
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/Adv/,
>chose a hard uni to learn to hard work and reach potential
>dropped out because of one subject, because external stress, stopped caring about my life, let alone uni (spoiled edgy kid)
>managed to get in there again
>finals are coming
Can you please, write me reasons why shit gpa is better than dropping out, because i have those perfectionistic breakdowns every single time.
It must be my childish mentality that fucks up everything everytime, like i constantly need ego trips not to feel like a failure.
Bump
How do you stop being afraid of screwing up?
>>17150133
no joke. see a shrink. If it's a big problem for you.
most of the time your problem isn't stress. But something causing it.
Those guys try and get it out you.
>>17150243
That may be a long term solution, thanks.
I have to do something right now.
I recently got put on zoloft and it was going great until I tried to masturbate..
I feel like my orgasm has been delayed and it's incredibly frustrating, does it ever go back to normal?
>>17150028
Inb4 the only thing zoloft does is ruin Mastrubation, fixing your life this way.
Seriously op you should be glad to have gotten rid op the curse of porn addiction
>>17150128
No it's a curse, if I was to have sex it would take me like 3 hours to cum
>>17150149
How is this a bad thing? Unless your only pleasure is cumming, bitches will be Hella impressed
Here we go
>Be me 19 years old Belgian
>Living in Belfast, Northern Ireland
>Live in a shared house
>5 males (including me)
>1 female
>Spanish woman in her 40's
>Still looking good af
>Tight ass
>Wearing leggings all day every day
>I'd like to get closer to here
Few problems
>Her Engrish is verrry Baddd
>I don't know if she likes younger guys
>I don't know how I can handle this
I know one thing and she is a nurse
Please give me advise
If succesfull i'll try it today
Find out if she's with someone first. No one on the house knows Spanish and can help you?
>>17150012
She doesn't have a boyfriend neither married
Never has visitors
and not really, I'm belgian, theres another danish, two english and a polish
>>17150020
The language barrier is the major problem. Abort mission. Language is important to catch the subtitles in how they pronounce certain words.
All this is lust and nothing else. You can find cougars at your local bar if you are desperate enough.
I was out at a restaurant by myself and got talking to an older lady. I'm 25. She would be 35 at the most. Probably younger. Anyway we found we are in the same growing industry so we traded details. Turns out she started her own business. We got texting and eventually met up for a date in the late afternoon. We met and she was neat, proper and prim. She wore a nice dress and lots of make up. I on the other hand looked very casual, almost unkempt. She drove me around, paid for everything (I offered but she refused),and we had fun. I don't know what point it was on the date but it was clear through her actions that she was loaded beyond my wildest imagination.
Even though I had fun with her, its fucked up that I like her more now because she has a lot of money. I never thought I’d be a gold digger but it seems like I am. What's even weirder is that I offer her nothing yet she seems really interested in me.
a) Is my greater interest motivated by her money socially acceptable or do I look pathetic? I feel like it makes me a lesser man.
b) What the hell could she see in a younger man like me? I am average looking and have an average job. The only plus sides is that I am kind of independent because I live by myself and have a variety of interests so I appear a little more interesting.
From what I gathered she has only a few close friends because she spent many years overseas and has been solely focused on her business.
You offered to pay as well
That doesn't make you a gold digger
She just want you both to have a great time
The answer is yes.
Could be as easy as
>you are a nice and pleasant young man
Her having money means that you won't need to try and impress her. She's sorted in that area, and you managed not to get intimidated by the fact. Like the other anon said, you did offer - just don't make it into a habit never to offer her anything.
How you proceed depends on your game in general, but I would eat that pussy out asap.
1/2 (Yup 1 of 2. This is going to be long.)
I'm mostly written this to clear my head a bit. But also looking for some input.
So of course like many stories on this forum ... there's this girl..
For months shes flirted with me. Shown all the signs she was into me. And a few times has basically has said so, that is she would say under her breath "You should take me out". But at the time I played it off jokingly and didn't pursue because she was in a relationship at the time. And I have this stupid rule where I don't get in between/interfere with love. --- Even though I always liked her.
So months pass by and her relationship gets rocky and they split. And with this I wait a few weeks before I approach her because she just broke up and that can be draining on a person.
When I asked her out I did it in person. Not over the internet or phone or any of that stuff. And got signals that I don't know how to interpret even though they were red lights. But giving the situation I'm not sure... as odd as that may be.
Now before I go any further on what she said when I asked her out I'll like to point out, not trying to boast, but I'm a good looking guy. I get eye fucked and flirted by women all the time. I have had girls come up and ask me for my number. Not many guys can say that they are the ones to have giving their number out. And I been told once I look like a Calvin Kline model and ending up dating the girl who said it. Now I do I have my doubts at times if I'm good looking or not but with the evidence giving to me I have to strongly assume I am a good looking guy.
Anyway, when I asked her out she was physically taken back as she smiled and fluttered her eyes and shook her head a bit. --- Her reply was 'Wait, wha, I didn't think you thought of me in that way.".
>>17149975
2/2
But then a red light word popped up. She said "I'm flattered". Now usually when a girl says that its a kind way to put a guy down gently because shes not interested. But I figure I'm a good looking guy so she must really mean shes indeed flattered and I ran that red light and said "Yeah I would like to take you out on a date".(No PUA lines here.) And asked for her number.
She gave me her number. But then said.. "I just got out a relationship so I cant make you any promises". --- And that threw me off a bit because who accepts a date proposal like that? Stating no promises?. But then went on to tell me how she was heart broken and all over her break up.
So with her expressing heartbreak I decided against my gut feeling to wait to text her. And I played it real strong and waited a whole week because she laid the whole heartbreak no promises thing on me so I felt no need to push that envelope. But at the same me waiting a week could of been a slight mistake.
So I went about texting her. And she obviously replied with "Whos this?". --- Knowing she would say that I already had a funny yet flirty line to follow up describing myself as she would know it was me.
2 hours go by. No reply. I know she knows its me. I reply with 'So how you doing?'.
She replys with "who is this though seriously I need a name".
Well I'm not buying into this game because I know she knows its me. So I tell her "lol nah, I think you know who it is."
She texts me my name.
With that I say "So now that you know who it is you going to answer my question?" referring to me asking her "How you doing?"
And it just dropped off. Nothing back at all. No reply even though I know she read it.
Is she playing super hard to get? Were those red lights I didn't pay much mind to really red lights? Or... with me being thinking self centered here, did she not reply at all to look separate herself from other potential girls?
>>17149975
>>17149981
Closing:
I don't know. And like I said I'm written this just to clear my head a bit. But any feed back or perspective from anyone who is willing to stomach through this wall-o-text of bullshit I wrote is welcomed.
She isn't into you.
It really is that simple. Put it this way, if a girl really likes a guy do you think she would play this dumb games? Even hard to get girls know that ignoring someone like this and acting like a bitch isn't the way to get a guy.
She probably has feelings for her ex and isn't into that kind of way. I think you know this and are in denial.
About a year ago I met a girl online and to make a long story short it developed into a long-distance relationship, largely over messages but with skype calls when we could get the privacy.
Over the course of the year she was dealing with a lot of family issues and her own emotional problems, which I was pretty much useless at helping with. This would lead to her breaking contact with me for a few days, or at the worst times a week or two, and coming back around when things settled down. During this time I never had an issue trusting her.
This went on until about a month and a half ago, when she cut contact with me overnight - just gone, didn't tell me anything, not answering or even reading my messages. I tried to check up on her after a week or so, no response. At that point I decided she'd either come back when she was done with whatever was the issue, or that our relationship was over (or, at times, that she had killed herself which I forced myself not to think about it)
Then this morning I wake up and check one of my messaging apps and notice that she's changed her username and picture. Still hasn't read the last message I sent her on that app, but she's definitely using it. So now I don't know if I should confront her just to get her to tell me what happened, or just ignore it and forget about her - or what I should do if she does start talking to me again in the future.
My instincts tell me that I need to forget about this and move on, but I don't want to rule out the idea that there was something serious happening on her end that she needed to deal with (her family are crazy and may have taken her phone/computer away, for instance)
Move on. Your instincts are right.
She is using you like a tissue anon and will only spring up when things are convenient. She knows your options are limited to her and so you will await her like a loyal dog. Have dignity and cut this off for good.
Just send a simple message asking what is going on..
Then forget her..
What is important here.. By what I see.. is your conscious.. So.. This is what I would do..
>>17149903
See now I feel even less like that's the right answer because you're trying to dictate to me the thought process of someone you've never met.
That and the fact that she previously would break contact with me specifically when she had to deal with her own problems, which goes against the whole "using me for support" angle
I'm back for my half-yearly petting on my back or punch in the face, whatever you think is suited. I'm officially the biggest dumb-ass ever, my decisions have made me a lonely person with barely any friends and no girls chasing me.
I threw the only person, who truly loved me and was loyal to the bone, out of my life without ever communicating to her we needed a time-out. She moved to a different city and I simply quit talking, texting, responding - to an extent she thought I had died. There was a reason for it, but it doesn't justify this action.
Now she is in a new relationship and I want her back so badly. I've made the 180 degrees, stopped rolling my eyes and finally see what I really need in my life - someone who loves me. I thought I'd miss out on something if I stayed with her. It turned out to be the opposite way.
I feel so stupid and dumb for having been so blind and stubborn. I'll have to live with this for the rest of my life. Why do I do such shit to myself? Why am I so narcissistic? Why did I take her for granted?
What the fuck do I do?
We're talking to each other again and I am so surprised she doesn't block me out of her life now. I'll be forever grateful for that and I've told her how I try to think rationally now without whining too much about what pain I caused her, what I got myself into and that I was longing for just one chance to make things right again, to show her that I can really be her dream guy.
But - for now? - I have to accept she's gone. She's gone, and it's my own fucking fault. I should have told her we needed a time-out and it would have been ok. But I never did. I never said anything. I just removed myself from her life. I thought it was necessary for the two of us to get along with ourselves first before we engage into a deeper relationship. And it was true, it really was needed, just not in the way I did it. Worst decision of my life. And I thought I had learned from earlier lessons.
I'm 33. What the fuck is wrong with me?
Oh for the love of god stop bitching and complaining. You sound pathetic. Jesus man you need to understand that life is tough and that some times you badly fuck up. Instead of bashing yourself all the time and feeling like shit, you need to accept your problems and understand that you won't be ever doing that again.
Now continue to talking to her but realize it is over. She is happy now and you are nothing more than at best an acquaintance she will chat with once in a while. You need to mentally move yourself to find another girl and that starts by accepting the proposition that if you could find a girl as amazing as she was before then what is stopping you from finding a girl who is as good if not better? It is all about how you see the prospective of your situation.
>>17149889
I pretty much agree with this. Moping about the mistakes you made isn't helpful. Learn the lesson, be mindful of what is actually valuable to you, and get on with life.
You can also watch this relevant video until you feel better.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h0IpjnByfs
>>17149889
>>17149939
Of course I sound pathetic man, I just hit rock bottom. I also know you're right about pretty much everything, except for the acquaintance part, she says herself she never had something like this before. We chat much more than we probably should. But she also states she is happy and can't risk her current relationship. Trust me, when I talk to her, I sound rational, not like the whining one here on /adv/. I'm using /adv/ to cry my heart out exactly because I can't/don't want to do this in front of her.
The reason I bash myself up like this right now is because what I did was absolutely stupid and I thought I had learned from the past.
It just sucks to realize that sometimes you can't think straight for months and when you wake up, it's too late, realizing you've done the same mistake you did before when you had already sworn it'll never happen again. Well, why does it happen again? It's so important to be nice/kind and honest with everything all the time. It's the only way things stay CLEAN. This here wasn't clean at all.
So guys, it's a fresh situation and of course I'm moping for as long as I think I need to in order to find the positive essence in it that helps me become a better human. It will be okay one day.
>It is all about how you see the prospective of your situation.
I know this and absolutely understand. The "right" (helpful) perspective will come with time. Right now I'm dead. We'll see what tomorrow brings. Until then, I'll embrace every second I get with her.
Maybe the only good thing about this is that I learned a lot about myself. I'm re-inventing myself. That can only be good.
I'm just wondering if it's normal to do the same mistakes over and over...
I have a stoner-friend who's getting a little on my nerves. He's not a bad guy per se, but he's constantly messaging me and rambling about shit I don't care about. Like edgy teen-tier stuff, about how corporations are after us, and that capitalism will be the end of society and whatever. I don't necessarily disagree with everything he says, but the way he talks about it just makes him sound like a schizophrenic maniac. We've had interesting discussions in the past, but he has no sense of appropriateness and comes off intense as shit. My energy level is way low in comparison. At this point I feel like I'm enabling this type of rambling in him by responding to it with courtesy. This is a problem, because he's being obnoxious as fuck.
So I guess the problem is I don't want to alienate him by not replying, because he's been a good friend to me in the past. How do I tell him to calm the fuck down without coming off too blunt?
>>17149807
Just be honest. Say you don't necessarily disagree but he is on overkill and sounding crazy. Also tell him about the Marijuana legalization conspiracy and how the govt wants us to be doped up so we're too lazy to fight back.
>>17149812
I believe he knows that he is sounding crazy. He even joked about this a little, and I told him that it's somewhat true. The problem is it doesn't stop there. If it's not paranoid conspiracies, he just rambles on about himself. For instance, how he can taste and visualize sounds or something in that vein. How he's special and different from other people. It's plain narcissism. I could be blunt about that, but I feel like he wouldn't be able to handle it if I'm being honest.
>>17149807
bump
Okay, so I'm chillin with that 19 year old virgin life, or at least so I was. A week ago, I got drunk and so did my neighbor. I blacked out, but came to a couple times, and I was making out with her. I remember that, blacked out, came too again and she put my dick inside of her, but I was so drunk I couldn't really get hard, nor could I even feel her hand on my dick or me inside of her, and when I tried to push it in further, it pretty much just made an upside down U shape. Then we stopped I think and I woke up in my bed the next morning.
so, would you guys say I lost my virginity? I mean, I feel like I technically did cause I was inside her, but I feel like in reality I didn't because I was in her for like five seconds, couldn't feel anything, and didn't get anything more than my head in there cause I was so soft. And I still feel like a virgin, cause really, I've still never fucked a girl, just had the head of my dick in there for like 6 seconds and couldn't feel anything.
>>17149803
Your mother must be so proud.
>>17149803
Congrats, you're not a loser virgin. Just a loser.
>>17149803
>it pretty much just made an upside down U shape
So... Like a lower case "n"?
So me and my friend are pretty regular weed smokers. We recently found a guy who sell dabs and we were thinking of smoking dabs exclusively.
Is this viable? Buddy says it's about $50 a gram. How long would a gram of dabs last 2 people? (We usually only smoke at night before bed).
>>17149785
probably 4-5 years
For me, dabs is too "man-made". I prefer weed cuz it's all natural and the weed culture is also a big part of why I smoke. That being said, I've never tried a dab so I could not advise fairly. Whatever your preference I suppose (especially if it's cheaper).
>>17149785
Weed is easier to manage because it is less potent
You will gain mad tolerance if you start smoking dabs, and the first weeks will be very very hazy
to drink a prostitutes urine?
>>17149742
No it is not cuz if she has the clap it'll get contaminated.
>>17149976
>No it is not cuz if she has the clap it'll get contaminated.
Not quite true, assuming you think hooker pee can give OP the clap. It can't. You can test for gonorrhea via urine, but not transmit it.
You CAN catch bilharzia (a parasitic infestation coming from freshwater snails, mostly found in Africa and South America), typhoid, and certain cytomegaloviruses (cousins to herpes, mostly non-symptomatic) from whizz. And if she does have nasty STIs, the pee could be especially disgusting (cloudy, full of mucus or pus), but it's not a vector for disease (ie, it won't get you sick).
The old chestnut that pee is sterile isn't true, but it is true that it doesn't really carry transmissable disease.
>>17150049
>. It can't. You can test for gonorrhea via urine, but not transmit it.
Nice!
I woke up this morning and my room was overrun by ants. It's a fucking ocupation.
What do?
>>17149725
Get some insecticide. Follow the ant trail backward to find out where they're coming in. Spray. Not a bad idea to spray the whole trail.
Now go outside to where they're coming in. Spray there too, back to wherever they're coming from. Spray the perimeter of the area.
And if they're coming in for food, don't leave food or dirty dishes out. That's how you get ants.
>>17149725
Try to speak to the ants and find out where their leader is. Once you have this information, try to negotiate a peace deal with the leader. Even if you reach a deal, gather your arms and prepare for war.
If you need me to help you (ex-soldier) - I know a wizard who can provide potions and other magic to destroy the ants. The only thing you need to do is give me your sisters phone number.
Let me know...
>>17149729
It is done.
Funny story, when i took my pants to go outside I didn't realize they where full of ants. It felt kinda good tho.
How do I give a blowjob so fucking good it will ruin his life ? Picture not related.
blowjob? u gay or somethin op?
Does it matter whether I'm gay or not ? Smh
Right at the climax clamp your teeth down sideways at the base of the shaft.
My brother is a fucking asshole. He's a dick to everyone around him, and is manipulative as fuck. I've hated him forever (I'm two years older). I've always expressed my dislike for him, and ever since we were young, people have said
>Why don't you like him anon? He's the only brother you'll ever have!
>You to should love each other! You're brothers!
Is it wrong to hate a family member even though they're family?
>>17149704
No my brother is a sack of shit- last time I saw him was 5 years ago and I knocked him out. Just because you share some blood, doesn't make them family.
There is nothing wrong to hate a family member even if you are family. There is no law that even says parents must love their children and vice versa. Once you provide the basics of familial duties (physical, financial and emotional support in difficult times, shared care of other family members), there's no fucking reason why you have to pretend your brother's farts smell like Chanel.
If anything, more strife and conflict arise from the fact that we are socially required to hide this shit and pretend.
But it comes into the other aspect of things. Yes, you are allowed to hate your brother. No, it's inefficient and stupid to expend energy on letting other people know how much you detest your brother to the point they are commenting on it. The two are entirely separate things that you need to learn to distinguish.
>>17149704
>Is it wrong to hate a family member even though they're family?
No. You can hate abusive, toxic family members and cut them out of your life.
>>17149710
>Yes, you are allowed to hate your brother. No, it's inefficient and stupid to expend energy on letting other people know how much you detest your brother to the point they are commenting on it.
This though.
Honestly, without you describing some of the things he's "done", who knows if YOU'RE not the asshole in this situation?
hi to all
i'm the owner of a private club, i have some problems with an older woman that lives nearby, she screams to the people who stands out of the club smoking and talking
at a reasonable volume, she menace to call the police; the police come a found no problem, then she calls the environemental protection because the law about the laws about anthropic sound are very restrictive here...
Then she calls the newspaper to mke an article against the club; the she make a petition with some older womens like her to stop the
nighttime noises.
So i get very bored and stressed about this woman i want to fix this thing, until now i can't even think to do something more "muscular" because the street and in general the town where i am with my club is ful of suveillance cameras, moving is not an option, i have put to o much effort to open this place i can't move now.
Sorry for my poor english, i'm not native speaker.
>>17149613
Stop breaking noise law?
>>17149613
Invest in a smoking cabin
Get the bouncers to tell people to not make noise
Try to ignore the woman and take up a discussion with her. Document her screaming. Let yourself be interviewed with local tv and papers and explain yourself and be reasonable
>>17149613
Night clubs are often considered to be a huge nuisance by neighbors. They bring noise, public drunkenness, and all sorts of criminal behavior. Even if you don't have the latter two, you certainly have the first and it sounds like you'd have the criminal behavior except you're afraid of showing up on video.
Keep your customers inside where they won't disturb others.
Unless you are very well connected politically, getting into a fight with your neighbors is going to be a losing proposition.
