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How do I know if I am a sociopath or just a generic autistic guy?
>>17189895
If you're asking this, you're probably autistic.
>>17189895
If you're thinking about it, you're just an autist
Based on what you asked you are just 13 years old and neither of these
I think I have a problem. I'm starting to feel very obsessive about someone who's precious to me. They're my only friend in the world, and the only thing I care about anymore. I've spent a lot of my life around the wrong people, getting backstabbed and betrayed far too often. It's gotten up to the point where I keep my pool of friends small and don't even bother meeting new people, or acting as friendly as I usually would when others approach me. And whenever I don't get to spend time with this person, I feel horrible. All kinds of negative thoughts flow through my mind, especially jealousy. Thinking that they're spending time with better people than me. But it's mostly depression/loneliness. And I don't know what to do anymore. I can't bring this up with them because they genuinely wouldn't understand. They have less emotional response than the average person, and I don't want to bother them because we've already been through so much. I need to have someone in my life to survive, I can't stand the thought of being alone. Isolation is death to me, and I bear many emotional scars from losing good friends due to negative and/or unfortunate circumstances. I honestly can't even begin to explain how it makes me feel. It's so awful that just the thought of being alone makes me want to curl up and cry. I'm insecure, I have no willpower and I'm not very perceptive. I used to be much different, much better than this. But I'm scared that I'm walking down a path of self-destruction by letting these feelings get to me, and if it doesn't stop something bad will happen. We share a very platonic relationship and they're really the only person I can trust at this point. I don't think this obsessive mindset is too extreme just yet, but going an entire day without getting to have a small chat or hearing them saying they don't want to hang out (either for a while or the whole day) is painful. When I shouldn't be feeling this miserable.
cont.
>>17189885
I can't figure out what to do, so here I am. If anyone thinks they can guide me in the right direction, I'd appreciate that. I apologize in advance for this massive wall of text, and there's probably more I'll need to talk about before anyone can help me. But I'm desperate to get this pain to stop so I can spend less time being a sad sack of shit, and more time doing anything else. And uh, I don't have any friends in real life. Never really had the chance to connect with anyone like that. So yeah, I'm just some troubled loser who only really talks to a few people on the internet these days...hope you folks are tolerant and considerate enough to understand. I just want solace in...anything, at this point. I don't even know anymore. I used to be a good example of positivity, but now I'm in the same pit I've dragged so many people out of.
I remember hating, breaking up with a clingy friend and getting jealously insane with another one (a bit romantic though).
Yeah, that, "if he didn't text me today, he must be laughing with the girl he recently added or his besties" and it was crazy. I thought 24/7 about that possibility, cut all contact, while numbing inside, because I am a hysterical bitch. That guy had a sort of "hate being alone" mindset, got upset, I regretted that heavily.
Well, I told you some unrelated shit, because I love being alone more than anything else. Talking from the opposite side of the problem.
Hate that psychology self-diagnosing, but the condition of yours is similar to dependent personality disorder. At least look at causes and treatment get some ideas, not consider it seriously. Met people who can't stand being on their own as you can read, and they all had self-loathing or self-esteem issues.
>I'm insecure, I have no willpower and I'm not very perceptive.
That must be the root of the problem. They were like that too.
Like you need another person to validate yourself. As meme as it sounds, learn to love yourself, feel like you're strong and worthy enough to exist. Focus on your victories, become the best friend you seek.
It is hard, but it should do the job.
The family could be the reason, childhood, it must be deep-seated.
Won't go away easily.
Please, don't put responsibility on solving your issue on your beloved friend, nobody would like such a pressure. And don't write that you can't breathe without him/her. It's your fight, and you should have the courage to fight it.
>>17189956
You bring up some good points. Thank you, I'll try my best. And I suppose childhood and family issues were some factors, when I reflect on why I'm like this. I'll tough it out and try to make myself a better person. I understand that it won't be easy and I can accept it. I'm probably still gonna cry like a bitch at night and suck at fighting anxiety, but it wouldn't feel right to just give up completely. Deep inside, I'm better than this and I know it. Even my few friends know it, and they like being around me when I'm...y'know. They just somehow see the me on the inside that I haven't accepted yet, or something. The me that I've always wanted to be but never thought was possible. But I'm still me no matter how much I go through. And if I conquer this thing, I can be happy with myself and become a more desirable person. Maybe then I wouldn't have to worry about being alone.
Thanks a bunch, I think I've got the energy to relax and get through another day.
what would I ask my barber for in order to get this haircut?
You could just take him the picture.
>>17189873
"Gay me the fuck up, senpai."
>>17189873
He is a fuckabee
I always feel sad in the background. No matter what I'm doing, even if it's fun, it kind of just stays there and whatever I'm feeling couples with being sad. I'm still doing stuff, I finished school just recently, but I don't really feel any sense of accomplishment. The sadness just kind of stays there in background.
I saw a therapist for a year, didn't help. I even went on meds but it simply wasn't worth it and brought up other problems.
What could be a reason for feeling this way, or what's some advice that could help?
Bump because I know other anons must feel the same
>>17189860
You are likely a deep thinker, like myself.
>>17189960
Iktf bro
Are long distance relationships possible?
I really love my girlfriend, we promised each other we wouldn't break each others trust while we both go to college (we're like 5 states away) and i really want to make this work. We talked about marriage but we both agreed to do that after we finish.
I trust her not to do anything because she's always been someone who would rather sleep at home or study than party (unless her sister or friend makes her go out with them). The only thing im afraid of is that shes almost overly-friendly with strangers. When we both were highschoolers and before we were officially together, there was a span of many boys who kept getting attached to her because she couldn't see they were into her and do something about it. Besides that, nothing else.
Ive never been a charismatic guy who flirts with everyone he meets, ive only ever focused on one girl and never have done anything to hurt them, also like my girlfriend; i dont really enjoy partying, so i trust my self not do anything stupid.
I love her and i hope she loves me back, and im ready to make this work. What do you guys think?
Op,
This issue concerns you now fresh out of high school. After four years of college you will not be the same person. She will not be the same person. Can a long distance relationship work? Yes. In the right circumstance, however, for two horny 18 year olds? No. It will not work. You will only hurt yourself, and your girlfriend if you pursue this. If youve both decided that college is more important than marriage, maybe that should be a good indicator that your love for her it not as intense as you think that it is.
>tl:dr youre young and horny. It wont work.
Why did you go to separate colleges?
>>17189894
Different interests and grades. obviously i wont disclose where im going , but its for astrophysics, and she wanted to do medical things.
I have never orgasmed, nor have I ever been horny. I have masturbated regularly since I was about 12, and had sex with several experienced/good men but to no avail. Why am I like this?
>>17189777
masturbating wrong is my guess. change it up. Some girls just can't cum though, so you may be one of those unfortunates.
>>17189777
Have you been in a relationship with these people. It doesnt matter how experienced you are, if you dont have time to know what a person likes and dislikes then its never going to be great.
>>17189783
People who know what they're doing can't get the job done either.
>>17189795
Only one, but that was for about 2 years so that should've been long enough.
How to get over feeling like an oddball, feel like you don't belong anywhere, everyone is out of your league? And that people talk with me only out of politeness?
How do you fix it?
I hate bothering people, and I feel like I do and I waste their time.
>>17189776
I know this FUCKING feel. OP of >>17186275 here.
One solution is to find someone that seems to appreciate you strangeness. Made some progress on that today, actually.
Another is to embrace it. Watch movies. See the freak characters that go around making everyone uncomfortable on purpose and enjoying it? Start doing that.
>>17189776
What specifically makes you feel like such an oddball?
a few things
>feeling like an oddball
its okay to be odd. it feels cringy to describe myself as odd, but there isnt a better word. but that being said,
>you dont belong anywhere
not true. society isn't homogenous in any way. were all different. a lot of people have one really weird thing but htey slowly introduce you to it so you dont think they are weird.
recently i met a girl off tinder, she came over to my place. in one night i let out ALL of my crazy due to a brain disorder i had that kinda made me unfiltered.
and to my surprise even after talking about flat earth theory, and dinosaurs and cartoons, she came back the very next night. and we've been seeing each other ever since. going over to hers tonight actually.
>everyone is out of your league
if you mean emotionally or interest wise, find people like you. if you mean looks wise, you cant be that bad. most people arent really attractive (Especially girls) they just put work into it.
especially me. if i put no effort into my appearance id look like an ugly ass mother. like the ugliest. but with all the hard work i put in im about a 6. maybe a 7 when i get fit, we will see.
worse case scenario if it really does bug you that much get plastic surgery. in my opinion as long as you did something like workout to make your body right, its okay to spend money (Especially money you earned) to fix the things you cant fix 'naturally'.
just remember that people are assholes regardless of whether or not you are a good person. and people are good regardless of whether or not you are an asshole.
just be the best you that you can be, do what makes you happy, and dont worry about what people think in their own brains.
Hello /Adv/. I would appreciate any advice on where to find decent women. The culture in my city has made it really difficult to find half decent women, in regards to personality. More or less all the women i speak to dont do anything but go shopping and clubbing, im aware that good women but exist in my city but i have no idea where to find them. The women in my city look good but i cant stand talking to them.
Is one who only sees shitty people around them also shitty themselves?
>>17189773
not really. thats like saying Nietzsche was a shitty person because he critiqued Europe.
How old are you? And where do you usually talk to women? There must be some in gyms, universities, libraries. Try foreign language courses. Yoga. Or any kind of self-improving courses, which aren't a scam or sect.
Don't friends or relatives know good chicks?
Hi guys,
Sad story bla bla. So, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me almost 3 months ago and so far, it's going okay. I guess it will still be a while before I really forget her or she keeps popping up in my head.
I was just wondering how you experienced heartbreak and what you did to recover from it? Has it changed you in anything positive? Perhaps negative?
Just wanna hear some stories, honestly.
Pic related: it's how I feel like doing sometimes.
>>17189691
heart break is the single most common thing in the human experience with the exception of breathing and death.
everyone gets it. everyone survives. those who dont are pretty fucking edgy trash who watched a few too many disney films.
all relationships end in one way or another. and thats not me being edgy dark. like vision said 'something isn't beautiful because it lasts'.
or if you want something a little less avengersy, here is a line from the sonnet of fidelity:
>I'll be able to say to myself of the love (I had):
>Be not immortal, since it is flame
>But be infinite while it lasts.
im not sure why the idea of 'eternal' love has become so popular. from an evolutionary stand point it doesn't make much sense. but its something we all yearn for at a young age and most of us let go of as we get older. especially in this day and age where you go from one romance to another.
just remember that back in the 'good ole days' the relationships only lasted 'forever' on a technical level. honeymoons end. true colors show. people change. dynamics change. at some point your wife feels more like a sister.
>>17189716
Hey, thanks for your reply.
You're definitely right. In the sense that everything is finite. Every moment is finite, because you'll never get the exact same moment back. I was not referring to the thing of 'eternal love', but maybe more of coping with loss.
>especially in this day and age where you go from one romance to the other
Maybe it's me being old-fashioned, but that's not really how I would like to imagine my relationship life.
You're right in the sense that things change, because they always do. Perhaps that's the good thing, as well as the tough thing.
Thanks for your view on this.
>>17189724
>thats not really how id like to imagine my relationship life
and maybe it wont be. but its best not to think of getting the girls as the climax to your movie if you catch my drift. shes never there in the sequel.
also if you wanna get REALLY old fasioned, humans arent really designed to live beyond thirty anyways, so assuming your wife didnt die in child birth you'd be together for like 15 years max.
/Adv/, do normie guys like skeptical or reserved girls? Do guys in general even like them?
I don't know, my personality is all about being aloof, trying to form opinions myself and be as stoic as possible. Was emotionally unavailable in childhood and teenage years, but I'm slowly getting better.
Losing hope here.
When talking to guys, I either act indistinguishable from one or try to fake being a normal girl. That, if a guy falls for me , he is confused, when I slip into deadpan snarker mood.
I feel screwed, anons. Yeah, you can get a relationship with zero personality compatibility, simply being nice to each other, but it doesn't sound like a long-term solution.
Looks don't go less than 5/10, ironically naive childish face, pretty ok body.
Pic unrelated.
>>17189680
just do you. don't put on the act to get a relationship. The act works for sex but not for anything long term.
Like, how would you feel if you dated a guy who seemed really nice, and wealthy, and found out six months later that he's actually an asshole and took out a loan to try to impress women with no better plan?
It's a bait and switch.
>>17189687
Yeah, anon, I'll try, thanks.
Kind of got burned with this one.
Still have insecurities and shit, you see.
>>17189687
It's hard to believe that a guy would like a girl, who is the opposite of cheerful, wearing her heart on her sleeve and comforting. Every guy I liked, found an open, even clingy girl, and yeah. It's kind of real.
There is number one rule, that you should never damage a guy's self-esteem and it's a bit tricky.
About "bait and switch" thing, when I liked a guy, it felt so rude to start ranting and upsetting him, so I got more and more cheerful, it even started changing me. My emotions still felt abandoned, it isn't the right way.
I'm going to be direct, I'm a male virgin extremely hormonal ever since I masturbated for the very first time last year, for the past year and a half i became addicted to masturbation to the point of doing it 3 times a day even though each session just leaves me frustrated and depressed that I had to resort to masturbation for release.
I extremely want to have sex, but sadly I have no experience on how to do this and unfortunately losing my virginity to a hooker doesn't sound like it would help. I feel if I did it that way it would just make me too used to paying for it and crave sex with someone who WANTS to do it for free thus my problem wouldn't go away it would just evolve.
Plus I recently learned from the closest experience I had to getting laid I don't stay aroused unless I'm fully sexually attracted to a girl otherwise I will go limp extremely fast before its time to get down to business.
Now that the prologue is out of the way, most of my friends in addition to poking fun of my situation just casually suggest I see a therapist and I'm unsure of how likely that is to help me, even a sexual therapist doesn't sound like they'd help. Plus I'm extremely hesitant to spend money on something I'm not sure will provide be with results.
So for those who's been to either of them how were they and did they actually help?
I get laid at least twice a week and I masterbate one or two times daily.
As for the limp thing, that's probably because you're nervous as hell and is also normal.
>>17189673
Wouldn't mind masturbating as much as I do so long as I knew what the better alternative was like. I think the mystery of the unknown is what makes me feel angry and depressed at myself for masturbating.
The limp happened twice with the same girl on different days which was the reason why I went to the doctor to check myself and after stating their opinion that it was most likely a matter of attraction they suggested masturbation and when I did it for the first time thats when the addiction started and the urge grew stronger.
>>17189658
it works as far as I know, but it is usually something one goes to with their partner.
![Ballad_Cable_Hogue_VCL05021007[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/TbzAsDm.jpg "Ballad Cable Hogue VCL05021007[1]")
I'm 25 and want to move out from my mom's house with my older brother still living there. I wish I could stay and save money and attend college, but i'd rather move out considering the conditions of my brothers dickishness and my moms clingyness. I tried enough and need to do things for myself instead of staying with my mom and bro.
I make about 8k a year+ benefits, what can I expect when I decide to move out
Who has moved out and been completely independant? do you remember your first time?
>>17189621
expect to share a room at the very least.
>>17189635
I thought the same and have 1 friend who is a possibility and he wants to move near me. I havnt brought it up with him cause hes a friend and want to make sure he isnt going to be a mess. He couldnt be worse than my family though.
>>17189621
I know that you are probably decided already, but try to cope with mom and bro. At the end of the day, they are your family anyway. Getting that thick skin mindset and saving up the money is imo better than having to deal with landlord/roomies and pay for A LOT of shit you wouldnt have to otherwize
I can't be flirtatious with girls, because I have a deep seated fear of saying something wrong, and not necessarily being rejected, but being attacked for 'sexual harassment' or being 'rapey'. I'm not talking shit like 'hey girl nice tits', but a 'hey, why don't we go back to my/your place for some wine?' at the end of a tinder date for example.
I went to a liberal private high school, where everything got around and getting rejected literally meant social suicide in a circle of >100 kids. I'm a decent looking dude with a healthy sex drive so naturally I tried to ask girls out with very limited success.
I enter college, and apparently it's completely normal among the rest of the population to just flirt hard with each other. Compared to my upbringing the shit I heard guys and girls say to each other was a fucking Brazzers script. I'd see guys that would literally pull an 'ey bb u want sum fuk' and girls would be down.
Apparently I'm physically attractive, because girls come up to me at parties and say so. Girls will show me attention, and some will even make the first move in fucking me. But I have never, ever in my life 'gamed' a girl into bed/a relationship etc. I'm just haunted by my younger days where if i were to say 'hey, maybe we should enjoy this wine at my place? ;)' just meant literal public shaming from SJW's.
Now I'm out of college and working, and I haven't shaken this hangup. With all this rape-culture hysteria and the gender-equality movement picking up steam, I just have a paranoia that if I try to make a move I'll just get an SJW fist to the face or something. Even if the girl is obviously flirting on me, unless she jumps on top of me (literally) i'll be really hesitant to make a move. What if she tells her friends I raped her? What if she tells her friends I'm a misogynist for xyz reasons?
tl;dr I'm piss scared feminists are going to ruin my life so I have trouble flirting and initiating sexual encounter what do
>>17189572
>social suicide in a circle of less than 100 kids.
fixed
Quit believing internet horror stories about "feminists" and "SJWs", what are you getting this from Breitbart? Your expectations are clearly false based on what you have observed other guys doing.
Drink more to loosen your inhibitions.
The internet is full of pickup advice, it is literally one of the most talked about topics next to videogames and porn, avail yourself of it.
>>17189611
This.
How do I get over the fact that I'll never have a cute girlfriend?
I'm probably a 4/10 on a good day. I'm also quite short at 5'4", so. All the girls I've dated I've only been attracted to somewhat. The best looking one might've been like a 5, and broke up with me because her friends teased her.
I know this sounds like some high schooler post. But whenever I see a really cute girl it kills me because I'll never have a chance. I don't know how to accept it...
Try nofap to make you so horny that you're attracted to girls in your league.
>>17189542
>work out
>have a good job
>take extra care of yourself (styling your hair right can go a long way)
and if your face is not salvageable as is, consider plastic surgery. but you'd be surprised what options there are out there.
it may be 'gay' but getting some of the lighter skin procedures can make your face go from awful to 'cute'.
just sayian.
>>17189586
I only fap like twice a week
>>17189596
I don't make much money but I really enjoy what I do
Just a mix of bad bone structure, really bad hairline (not balding, just bad hairline), unsymmetrical face, etc. I don't think surgery could do much desu lol
And I'd feel pathetic doing so anyway
What is the best method to kill yourself?
I'm at home, it would be best if it could be simply done by using household supplies.
I'm considering several methods, like cutting my throat or hanging, but am a bit confused about what the safest way is.
Best would be some kind of med that lets you sleep in, and kills you painlessly in your sleep. Anybody have some advice on how to successfully off myself?
Cutting, hanging, and especially pills are extremely unreliable and you're more likely to just injure yourself but survive.
The only effective ways are guns and jumping from extreme heights.
Talk to me anon, I'm in the midst of a painful bout of depression currently as well. I care and hope you don't kill yourself.
>>17189532
>safest way to kill yourself
your killing yourself. safety is not an issue!
im kidding i know you mean like, for other people who have to deal with the mess or for not ending up accidentally alive but suffering.
my advice? jump off a roof. if you argue
>UGH ITS TOO FAR
or
>UGH I HEARD ABOUT ONE GUY WHO JUMPED OFF A BUILDING AND IN A COMA NAD I DONT WANT THAT
then you dont actually want to kill yourself and will find an excuse for anything.
going to the nearest major city and jumping off the room of a tall building works great. it works really great. it has almost a 100% success rate after ten stories tall. and if you say 'there arent any bigb uildings near me'
its the last day of your life, just go take a road trip! or a plane trip. you may then argue
>BUT I DONT WANT TO SPEND MONEY THAT I COULD LEAVE TO MY FAMILY
that also doesnt matter. it wont cost you THAT much to get there so they arent going to notice the difference, plus you'll just end up spending it on yourself if you live.
also
>jumping off a roof is more fun
its like a roller coaster of death.
