Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 454. page
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Relationships don't work for me but I still feel really lonely
Is a waifu a good alternative? And if so , any tips on making a waifu type relationship more functional?
Why do you say relationships don't work for you?
>>17260171
Why not ?
I just want something that won't make me feel lonely is all
I dunno , it's not possible for me to get a gf or get laid , I'm sorta hoping I can ride this waifu thing out for awhile then getting a relationship when I'm older . Girls then will basically take anyone with a stable job at that point
>>17260174
Can't get them . Probably ugly and boring
No sex ever...
If you don't want to read the whole story... TL;DR: I can't have sex, I have no desire for sex, all of society is about sex, wat do?
---
Anyone have some advice on how to cope/function in society being unable to ever have sex?
Because of medical related stuff my dick doesn't work. And even with testosterone replacement I have no libido, not that it would matter if I had it.
So not only can I never have sex, I have no desire for sex. I have accepted it and it doesn't bother me... But society in general.........
Everyone...
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People who have sex are still miserable
>>17260116
But its not the lack of sex that makes me miserable, its having to talk about it with everyone everywhere at any given time and the subject being completely foreign and irrelevant to me.
Gee, I wish I were you. I hate it when I'm bored and the thought always comes around of jacking off and then after that, I feel unmotivated to do anything. You should turn this around into a good thing because now arousal can't distract you. Plus just because you can't have sex doesn't mean you can't have a girlfriend/get married. There are some girls like you who claim to be asexual. Just let life be. People are gonna talk about sex for a long time in their young years but it will phase out with time. Stop worrying about it like it's the end of the world.
>I only like you as a friend, I don't know if it will stay that way forever, but at the moment that's how it is
Damn why does it hurt that much?
>>17260104
>Damn why does it hurt that much?
Two reasons. The first is that when she says those words, what you actually hear is "You're not good enough. You didn't make the cut". Then there's the dissapointment. Don't know if it's the same for most guys, but I've never asked a girl out unless I was reasonably confident she'd say yes. Particularly when you're younger it's easy to get over invested in it. By the time you're asking her...
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Attachment is the enemy.
>>17260140
That's actually true, I've really thought about us being together and came to the conclusion that she's one of the few people who actually matches with me.
Doesn't help that we've known each other for a year now.
SO my ex has been posted a worrisome photo of himself. Yes i lurked... whatever. Basically it said he had a bad night, and posted a photo of him covered in words like faggot and other negative words. I want to know what I should do? I'm insanely worried, and if he's cutting himself, or idk. I'm just worried. he complained he can't cope because he just makes everyone mad. Is this a good time to step in? It's been about three months since we last talked and I don't know how to go about this. I'm also worried that his depression medication may...
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He's your ex and also, he sounds like an edgyelord and attentionwhore. Move on and let him wallow in his "misery"
If you're concerned about him, I'm sure it's fine to reach out and let him know you support him. The key, defining trait of people who commit suicide is social isolation. When people have friends, they do better. The vast majority of people who commit suicide are socially isolated.
Sounds just like a huge faggot indeed, don't try to help him.
Since /adv/ is also into psychological stuff ...
How traumatic is groping by schoolmates for girls of age 9-13? I'm not even at what age it usually starts?
Anyway I want to write a short story about this (I have some outlines but I want to do research) and I'd appreciate any impressions/info on this.
Thanks
>>17260087
no idea about at that age but in general, women's reactions to sexual assault depend on the individual. some have trauma, some don't, some people's trauma manifests differently than others'.
I can remember that there was one guy who would touch girls asses when walking by their chairs. It was annoying, but not traumatic. We just told him to fuck off. The other guys where too shy to actually grope girls. There was some fondling, sure. But more in a "pretend fight" and "mutual flirty" way. It's not traumatic at all if you feel like you are still in controle. I could imagine that very shy girls might feel harassed if a guy thought it would be fun to do that whole "play fight/flirty"- stuff they do with the bolder girls, with them....
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OP here.
There's a pic in my mind from age 11 or 12 (i'm a guy btw, was very introvert at the time, a "coward") but I remember this girl from a messed up family we had in our class. During break between classes, three or four guys would pin her in a corner and grope her crotch and breasts. She would go insane. Purple red, screaming, but it was like they were feeding on this. Teachers never payed any attentions.
Also we had cases when teachers would escort girls to bus station because schoolmates would be throwing snowballs at them. Well it...
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>live in Buttfuck, Nowhere
>want a real relationship
>all girls around me are slutty, really religious, or slutty for Jesus
>tried tinder but only found more like above
I plan on moving to a large city after college and i am very social its just everyone around me only associates within wealthy cliques.
What should I do because I made some money and can afford to not be alone
>>17260068
make friends with people online
not through 4chan, of course, unless you're careful. i've found social media to be helpful in that respect, if you follow interesting people in your city of choice>>17260068
make friends with people online
not through 4chan, of course, unless you're careful. i've found social media to be helpful in that respect, if you follow interesting people in your city of choice
>>17260098
i hate this godforsaken website
>>17260098
Any way to accomplish without social media. I don't really use twitter and that stuff because I don't find it interesting and it is kinda antisocial sitting on social media all day
![Dollarphotoclub_76286710-e1423206683651[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/4FQkyS6.jpg "Dollarphotoclub_76286710-e1423206683651[1].jpg")
been dating this really cute chick for 3 months, shes 21, we've done everything else but oral and sex. She's a virgin and doesn't want to lose her virginity just to anybody. She wants to be apart of a comfortable relationship before losing it, she said:
"i want security to know that even if it doesn't work out between us, that losing it to you was s smart choice," "I want to be at a stage where im comfortable with your friends your family and the same way with my people"
problem is that this can take a while, probably a year plus because this is a long distance relationship, she doesn't know when her self but knows it will be awhile. I'm not gonna lie, im extremely frustrated and mad and don't even know wtf to do. I don't know if ill come across a dime like her again, shes sweet and an angel and we're get a long real well but at the same time I'm losing all interest. We sexted a lot but i told her it has to stop since its getting my hopes up and pretty much that its torture to myself.
>>17259998
OP the girl wants to wait and you want to nut. Find a girl that wants to fuck. Problem solved
>>17259998
losing interest from no sex means u dont like her, stop lying to your self, you just thpught she was easy
>>17259998
boy, I much prefer a girl that doesn't fuck right away cause I know she probably doesn't just fuck right away any set of balls and dick
For two years ive had an extremely bad panic disorder. I would go whole days feeling like i was dying. It got to the point where i had to stop working. I havent had a job since december. Im on meds now and im feeling a lot better, but im still dealing with anxiety on a daily basis and ill have a bad panic attack once every week or two. Im not open to trying other meds or increasing my dosage, and dont ask why, its a whole other story. Im not open to it though.
So my question is, what are proven ways to reduce anxiety? And im not talking about techniques to calm down in...
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>>17259964
>>17259964
>For two years ive had an extremely bad panic disorder.
>Im not open to trying other meds or increasing my dosage
So you have a disorder that causes severe chemical imbalances in your brain and you aren't open to changing or increasing any medication that fixes the chemical imbalances in your brain?
Nice.
Definitely be a shrink but like, also, don't...
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>>17259976
sometimes there's only one thing out of dozens & dozens that even begins to work. there are perfectly rational reasons to not want to change one's dosage
>>17259976
what did i say, dipfuck? dont ask about it. i have my reasons, now go suck a cock kid. thanks for your useless input.
How to ask for a fade cut? Pic sorta related
Is there something wrong with the concept of taking a photo of what you want done or something?
>>17259965
I guess. It's just I always ask for a trim and don't know what to do for something more.
Say you wanna look like one of those hipster kids from williamsburg, they'll know what you mean
we're both adults, i'm 25 and they're... in their 40s? what did they say, that college was 20 years ago for them? would it be weird to date them? they're my partner's old roommate (my partner's like 30). like i'm a poly queer but i'm usually leery about age gaps like this, even if i'm fully an adult and they don't have a position of power over me. like earlier i said that the only creepy thing about amber heard & johnny depp's relationship was the large power difference between them, but after hearing of his abuse i'm...
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i'm pretty high & would appreciate advice so i don't do anything i might regret
in the meantime i'll distract myself with other threads on here i guess?
>>17259949
Do they treat you right?
Do you treat them right?
If so, then who gives a fuck about age gaps.
>>17259992
i mean, i care about people judging me or them for it. i don't want to deal with stigma from people i respect. i suppose i should ask about their exact age, huh
To those people who have adhd, what is it like in an average day for you? I have adhd and I cannot imagine what it must be like. Normal people focus right?
Also, how do you decide what you want in your life? I have a million things I all want equally so I find it hard to work towards any given thing and I usually don't end up getting into anything enough to make enough progress, usually I just do a base amount of researching before I go "hm, I really want a better laptop, which needs money, so I better figure out ways to make more money!" and I'm...
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>>17259940
>look at me guys, I'm such a special snowflake, I can't even comprehend being normal!
>what's it like without ADHD
You know that feeling when you take the medication?
>>17260022
It only helps me focus some, so I have 10 things I want to do, instead of 50. So still don't really know what its like to only have one or two things to focus on.
>>17259955
Easy there cap'n
>>17259955
>>17259955
I think my fiance is a lesbian.
I know she dislikes having sex with me. She thinks I don't know that she's forcing herself every time - she acts super enthusiastic but there's always a bit of hesitation each time I put it in, and she always cleans up quickly after the deed. She'll never refuse to go down on me (she pretty much never refuses to do anything), but she always has that bit of hesitation before she touches anything or lets anything go in or out.
I just chalked it up to her not being very sexual, but according to my router's outbound...
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Well if your relationship is relatively healthy other than the few sexual quirks, then you should absolutely tell her. If you're correct then she will likely feel deeply relieved to know that you're okay with her sleeping with women if that's what she wants, and if you're wrong it should be something you can both laugh off and remember as a good funny story. Or something else that's entirely unpredictable could happen.
>>17259935
I guess I'm just sort of afraid she might leave me or call off the wedding. Our relationship is great, but if she 'comes out of the closet' that might mean not getting married.
Or am I being selfish wanting her to marry me even though she may not want to marry a guy?
>>17259953
You better sort this out before getting tied to anything m8.
Can you change your personality?
Is it possible to go from normal guy into fun guy?
From tense and anxious to relaxed and radiating "good vibes"?
>>17259880
>From tense and anxious to relaxed and radiating "good vibes"?
With drugs and/or alcohol, you can.
>>17259880
You can be whatever you want.
I think your question is really more along the lines of "how can I become a fun guy?"
>>17259896
I've been slowly trying to give less of a fuck and to be more relaxed in public, which was my main problem.
Hopefully it turns into automatic behavior with time.
So I was at party and fell asleep because too drunk in a bed. I woke up by an ugly chick starting to stroke and suck on my cock, I said nope no thansks and left.
Can I possibly report this to the police as rape/molestation and possibly getting some money for it? I kinda need some atm and in my country (Sweden YES) they take equality very seriously.
I know who it is so for the police to find her will be easy.
report it because it's rape, not because you might profit, you asshat.
>>17259875
Don't know if I wanna do a bunch of police stuff and not getting anything back for it.
>>17259884
Haha this is some Always Sunny in Philadelphia shit
Hopefully someone can answer this for me; I'm over 18, and I really have no where to go
So
Do I just try and live on the street somehow? Or is there such a thing as public housing for single young adults?
I don't have a job currently I've been trying but I have some issues; mental illness and some personal problems that have been impeding me.
Help?
>>17259865
Not sure if in US or not, but I know if my city we have a few hostels that will exchange work for housing.
I had a friend who would work 20 hours a week at the bar next door the hostel's owner co-owned, and in return was allowed to stay until alternative housing options arose.
>>17259865
Im so sorry OP. My hope the best for you. Can you enlist? As long as you're relatively fit (not fat), and have no major medical history you can get in.
>>17259932
I can't; I have a mental illness
>>17259908
I live in a suburb of Los Angeles I'll look for something like that
