Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 333. page
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So today I was with my friend, then later on unexpectedly, 2 of his friends show up at his house and they're really nice, but they talk about things I know nothing about and don't really talk much because I don't know what to say when they're talking about their own thing (they all 3 go to a different school than me). How do I make myself more social and get out there more during these situations with big groups?
Is there anything the three of you share in common? Maybe you could start up a conversation about that. Or perhaps you could ask them more about what they like/experiences they have shared.
>>17291021
>Is there anything the three of you share in common?
Well when something come's up where I can relate, I do get into the conversations and they go well, but it's just making the conversation that's hard.
>perhaps you could ask them more about what they like/experiences they have shared.
I never thought about that anon, thanks
>>17290992
Its tough 3 to 1 with any major connections in the group of 3
Maybe jump in and ask about what happened, or say "what did they look like" - try to get them to take a sentence or two to get you involved
Or if you really want to fit in, look up the stuff they talk about, so you can at least follow along better
>Get gf
>Praise the heavens, she's perfect
>Lose virginity
>Assume the sex will be rare
>I was wrong
>She's hornier than me
>Feelsgoodman
>A month and a half later, we have a pregnancy scare
>Sex decreases because we're both scared
>She gets her period
>Sex drive returns for me
>Not her
>Goddammit.jpg
>Three weeks later, she goes to the hospital
>Can't have sex
>Not allowed to see her everyday
>She becomes horny as fuck again
>Sex returns to normal
>Until April
>Literally the morning of, I could tell she wanted it
>Then we went to her doctor to discover that we fucked up on the birth control thing, plus her meds got changed
>Another pregnancy scare
>It's been over two months
>She still only wants it once a week
>Two weeks ago, however, since he hadn't been having sex for three weeks due to circumstances, she's horny again
>Told me she she wants it every morning
>Have sex on the 14th
>Tore her vagina (entered at the wrong angle)
>Injury=no sex
>Heals by Wednesday of this week
>Sex drive still hasn't returned
How do I fix this situation? It seems kinda sticky.
Wear a condom?
Or have a kid?
Even condoms don't stop pregnancies my child.
Maybe educate yourself on sex before sticking your dick in something that creates life.
>>17290958
I did when she restarted her birth control and earlier in our relationship during her periods.
I probably should, though.
That hard to figure out, eh?
I should probably talk to a professional about this.
Surely someone knows how to return our lives back to normal.
Everything is perfect now...except for this one thing.
Maybe I should accept it, be grateful that she's still willing to get me off during other days of the week, and not take any actual action unless her sex drive reduces...further.
Been talking to long-term crush for few months. I'm really fed up with this relationship. It is a come and go. We talk, we go out, but beyond that, nothing.
Should I be direct with her? Completely tell her that I want to be with her and stuff or I should fade away completely and just loose all contact?
Why I'm not accepting this as a 100% rejection is that she always posts some rejection type photos when we aren't talking and if I respond to her signs, she contacts me, now she left me with an unresponded text mesaage.
I want to finish this, I'm getting way too attracted to her and I hate that
Tell her your feelings and if she says no, you can cut off contact if you choose to do so.
>>17290956
How do I do that? Text or taking her out? Never been in this situation before
Also, of course I'll cut contact after that, I'm not going more beta than thos
You have two choices - get the answer or torture yourself
Give it a shot - you dont have her now, if you fade away you wont have her - so it looks like the only other way to POSSIBLY make her yours is to let it out
Remember you might get crushed, or you might get what you want - be ready for either result
I got sent to friendzone Auschwitz by the girl of my dreams. Do I keep contact or just break it off with her? Of course I have deep feelings for her and Im the jealous type who will snap in half if she gets a boyfriend. What shoyld I do advice?
>>17290938
Should* excuse autism
If you really like her that much, just keep talking to her and become closer with her, over time she might come to like you
>>17290938
You won't hurt her if she sees someone else, right? Cause if so, you should probably stay away for awhile. For her sake & yours. Don't want the cops coming to your place for physical assault.
Also, this is a good video for talking about the friendzone. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MexiC6Vz58
I'm really into this girl that I'm dating. Thing is, I don't feel physical attraction. And I'm thinking of asking her to be my gf, but I'm worried that I should be liking her face & body more than I do. I feel more attracted to random women I see everyday than her.
We've only had 3 dates though, have talked a lot on the phone, and messaged on Skype, so maybe this is normal. Anybody have any similar experiences? Should I just be friends with her?
>>17290937
if you say you are "really into her" then go for it
if you just want to go for looks, thats a different thing
>>17290981
I do genuinely like her, I'm just confused. At 20 years old, she's my first girlfriend and everyone I know has always told me that it's important to be both emotionally & physically attracted to someone (when you're romantically involved). So I'm just confused.
>>17290995
Oops, didn't mean to say "I'm confused" twice.
For the past 3 days, it feels like i cant fill my lungs to their full capacity. You know that feeling you get when you take a deep breath or yawn? That feeling that your airways open up and you get that nice full breath? I cant get it to happen. I barely ever smoke. I was told by doctors i have minor asthma, but its not like ive ever had wheezing or trouble breathing (although sometimes when i take deep breaths i can hear wheezing if its really quiet in the room, but ive never had an attack). Its just a feeling of dissatisfaction when i take a deep breath or yawn. I used to get this once in a long while when i was a kid, but it never lasted more than a day. Its really frustrating. Has anyone else had this? Could it be asthma?
Are you physically active?
>>17290871
This.
Holy shit I know exactly what you're talking about. I have had that in the past and it's always gone away eventually. I think it's all in your mind.
But I kept yawning and yawning trying to get that full breath.
One of my friends is a solid 9/10 (as a guy judging another guy) and has tried helping hook me up with dates. Issue is, I'm hovering in the 2-4 range. It's to the point that he can't even wingman because there's no negotiating a girl down to me after they meet him.
He's a cool guy and really believe in the "bee urself" motto, but he could probably get 90% of women without much effort.
How do the genetically damned cope?
Lower standards.
or become a comedian.
>>17290844
Hang out with uglier dudes to make yourself hot by comparison
I was the lower guy too, and had my share of chubby drivers :(
>>17290844
Just bee yourself and start lifting bruh. Shits easy lol bro.
Ok so its a weird story, but I get really anxious and nervous about this kind of stuff.
So I popped a pimple that existed near the "danger triangle" of the face. That was my first mistake. But I quickly put some alcohol-based aftershave on it. Then about 30 minutes later I found isopropyl alcohol and I applied that to the pimple about 3 times today.
About 2 or 3 hours ago I then developed a headache that is currently sitting right in the middle of my forehead. It's dull, but persistent and stays about a 2/10 to a 3/10 in terms of pain.
I'm just super worried that I just fucking gave myself a CST infection. It's 1:40 am I guess if I had to I could jet to the hospital, but I know for sure I'm going to the doc tmro in the morning no matter what.
What are the chances I gave myself a FUCKING deadly disease? I'm terrified right now, and while it's mostly my brain overthinking, I just want some sort of justification.
Bump
Please help, I'm really scared at the moment
will bump because i get anxious about these things too and i know how you feel anon, you're probably fine though
chill out you're fine
t. doctor
How much talking/getting to know someone should take place before asking someone out?
I've known her maybe two weeks now, don't get to talk that often but when we do, things seem to go fairly well.
It doesn't really matter, two weeks is fine. Not like you stop getting to know each other on dates.
>>17290832
That image is triggering me.
Boyfriend recently cheated on me so now I can't trust him at all.
Is there a way I can access his browser history without him knowing?
Why would you want to see all the german cei hypno videos he watches in a chastity belt?
I think this is the only thread where "get a hobby" is a proper response.
What? Instead, why don't you just end the relationship?
>>17290829
Because I still love him. This thread isn't about what I should do about my relationship. I just want to see what he looks at.
Found him at work with a busted wing, put some birdfeed in a dog crate with bowl of water, in my garage, if i take him to an animal shelter since he's wildlife will they euthanize him or should i just release him into the wild?
Animal shelter would be nice.
Sorry he is prob dead either way
You should nurse it back to health
Maybe it will reincarnate into a pretty girl who will marry you for your good deed
I've been abused in various ways since I was born. Verbally, physically, sexually, psychologically...
I've been basically raped my whole life.
I look at pictures of people and desire some of them and want a relationship with someone to try and enjoy life but my mind is dwelling upon all the ways others have ruined my life. I feel like if I was to even kiss someone it would remind me of them.
Is it possible to not let memories of others bother you? I feel like I hate existence itself but then I see a desirable person and desire a relationship.
How do you not think about other? When I try talking to people, often they'll say a name or something that makes me think of people I don't want to think about and I feel miserable again.
I feel like I can't even have a conversation with someone. It's like, if you were tortured and raped by someone then others would say their name while smiling at you. You kind of lose interest in talking and then the person who said their name is associated with them in a way, so every time you see that person or think of them it triggers thoughts of them smiling and saying the name of the person who wrong you so you don't even want to think of them anymore.
If something like that happens to your mind all day everyday is there even a reason to exist anymore?
No matter how you want a partner is there any point when they'll eventually say or do something that makes the thought of them remind you of others you don't like?
GBY - hopefully with time the past will disappear, and start to fill with different people. If you are an adult, maybe try to move, different town city state whatever - maybe the change of scenery can create new memories
>>17290810
I tried to do that but the government actually refused to let me leave. I'm not a criminal or anything like that. A lot of us in Canada are being forced to be Canadian because the majority have no desirability and want to molest and use those who do. The Canadian government, inducing law enforcement, play a game of trying to rub their crotches on desirable people :-/
Seriously... That part of the Canadian sense of humour.
People are surprisingly resistant to this kind of shit. You'll deal with this, especially if you'll find the right one.
Hey guys i need some advice. I am a 22 KV i have no experience on dating or being in relationships since ive never had a gf.
I need help as my job has just hired a new employee that i am basically training until she can work on her own. Basically we got along quick since we are from the same nationality, and now we hangout just the two of us, like tonight we spent the whole night after work until 1am walking around at a park and local mall and eating dinner.
My question is we have been hanging out for a while just the two of us and i really fell for this girl. I just want to date her and hold her in my arms everyday. She told thay she recently came off a relationship and that her ex still talks to her since he still likes her. She feels bad for how they broke up but she is over him.
I just want to know how can i make sure that i can date her and not be lead on even though i get mixed signals from her... I know that i am probably obsessing over her as i havent been in a relationship.
make sure you wont lose your job since that might mean something, unless you dont care about that
get up some nerve one night walking around, and tell her you have never had a girlfriend, because you have never met a girl like you before, would you like to be my girl?
remember you might get your feelings hurt, or you might get a girlfriend - weigh the options out, and be prepared to flip the coin, 'cause it might land on either side
>>17290846
yeah, don't say that. Ask her out for coffee or lunch. You should get to know her a little better first probably
>>17290930
This. It is not that hard. Take her out somewhere and see if she likes you back. Never tell her about being KV and other stuff like that. Good luck anon!
I need help buying a suit or two, and how to get the best fit for my frame. Slim suits are in style, but I have a wider frame all around - my best comparison is probably Chris Pratt. (No, I'm not ripped like in Guardians of the Galaxy, but I'm also not fat Andy either)
I almost feel like the pic here looks like the suit is a little too tight. What's the best style for someone with this kind of frame? My weight fluctuates somewhat too, so I'm worried about getting something that's absolutely form fitting and then putting on a few lbs and looking like shit.
Go to a mens store and get sized, you fucking idiot. Best to get slip on shoes because you are likely too stupid to tie laces.
Chris Pratt is wearing a 'normal' men's cut in that frame. Nothing fancy, no frills. You're thinking of that slim European cut, which you will likely not be able to pull off, no matter who tries to sell it to you.
Personally, I think the slim/european cut looks ridiculous, as if you took a suit that was too small and made the shoulders fit and nothing else. You won't be able to pull off that look unless you are a ridiculously cut model, a homosexual, or both. If you have the same kind of frame as chris pratt (i.e, normal) then you should get that same style of suit. His suit fits perfectly, it just looks a bit tight because of the way he's posed - you don't generally sit there with your hands in your pockets. It's moving the hem of his jacket out and stretching the front of his pants so they look like his hips are too wide.
Save up ~$100 bucks or so and go to Macy's and get sized. Tell them you'd like a suit in a traditional men's cut, pants on your shoes and and sleeves no more than 3/4ths of an inch past your wrist. You should be able to cup the hem of the jacket with your fingers when your arms are hanging straight down. Get a decent pair of loafers or oxfords in a muted color without too much patterning, which draws attention to your shoes, not somewhere you want people to be looking. As a gentleman, you don't want your suit to be 'loud' either, so pick one in blue, black, or grey. Subtle pinstripes are okay, and may even be beneficial as they'll let you match socks/tie to more colors.
(con't)
>>17291084
Unless you're fluctuating 30 lbs or so and ~3 inches on your waist, the fit is not going to be much of a problem. Jackets are fitted to your arm length, shoulders, and chest, for the most part, so it won't get too tight unless you develop a huge gut, and it's almost impossible for it to become baggy unless you are seriously overweight and lose it or are still growing. Same goes for pant length. Waist size is the obvious problem as mentioned earlier with weight gain especially, and if your ass gets too big it won't fit properly across the front and the stretching will show off your fly and make it look weird across the front.
For ~100 dollars, you will be getting a suit off the rack. Occasionally they will try to sell you on some kind of glue-fitting. Do not buy into this, because it will disintegrate after 4 or 5 times at the dry-cleaners. Check the material of the jacket. You should be able to separate it a little bit by rubbing your finger and thumb in a circle while you have it pinched - this means that the layers are actually sewn together and not, as previously mentioned, glued. Not every part is going to fit perfectly, but that's fine. You're better off getting something with a little more material in it, because this will help with the next step. Afterwards you should take your suit and get it tailored. She'll draw in the sleeves and hem (make sure you give the same instructions as before, because she may want to bring them up extra to show off socks/sleeves unnecessarily like in a euro-cut) and fix the material across the hips and back/shoulder if necessary. You can probably find an asian lady in town who will do the whole thing for 20-30 bucks.
Source: Father owned a clothing store for 10 years, still does all my clothier/tailoring.
That should just about cover it.
Ive literally never been able to hold a gf for more than 6 weeks. I just cant seem to entertain them! Im good looking, get looks every day, have had dozens of cute chicks approach me, good at flirting, but i never connect with girls on a higher level. I dont conform either, i refuse to hangout with there friends if they dont like me or vice versa. Never met a qt who had my same imterests (cars, football, guns, retro games, dude stuff etc). im scrawny and dont act alpha because im not. I dont mind awkward silence that stretches 5-10 seconds, i mean really, do we HAVE to jib jab 24/7 to be considered "normal"? I do have BAD social anxiety but i dont get it around people that are on my level of social status (popular people, meat heads, and hot chicks cause the most stress/anxiety because they DO NOT ACT THEMSELVES around eachother and it pisses me off) I have a very dry, dark, cynical sense of humor which makes me one of the most misunderstood people on the planet (especially around girls my age, im 20 yrs old).
Help me obi-wan /adv/, your my only hope.
Dude you have the goods it seems - if youre getting the approaches and flirting, so you have to start giving a little
She wants you to hang out with her friends, you have to do it eventually. Split it up, one day her shit one day yours - make those deals straight up when she asks you to do her thing
If you want all dude stuff in a woman find another dude - sike maybe hit up match or tinder with all your wishes and maybe catch what you want
>>17290880
Thanks desu, i know i have the good traits. My friends never match the girls i meet so i typically just split days, mine being alone with her. The cow town im in sort of sucks so i come off as boring sometimes.
>>17290902
Dude bring her along with your friends - They will act all different and you will be the one with the girl. That will boast your status as being the top dog in your group, and she might like that
- or think they are dweebs and dump you? haha no but if you live where nothing is you don't have many options
