Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 330. page
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I have a wonderful girlfriend, but I can't get excited about the relationship. She's crazy about me, but even after a year and a half I'm not sure if I'm satisfied.
Our sex life is good, we have a lot in common, we communicate well, and we've stuck together through some tough times, but I'm always unsure of whether I want to stay with her.
I've struggled a lot with depression and anxiety, and I think that may be the heart of the issue. I also tend to feel repulsed when I feel someone is attached to me, and by that same token I'm...
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>>17292064
bump
>>17292064
Honestly, I went through something similar (minus the depression and anxiety). I stuck with her and I only ended up hurting her more, but that was because what was causing the disinterest for me was something completely different than what is going on with you. I think that if you really feel like things will be different when you get help and you honestly feel like she will help you through it, you should stay with her. Someone who is willing to go through so much just to help you and be able to continue dating...
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Sounds like you might have the mentality that the grass is greener on the other side. The only way to truly find out is to go and taste it.
So recently in a sort of relationship with this girl for about a week. Three nights out of this week we've ended up naked in bed together.
First night I didn't have any condoms and I just thought, oh dang, whatever... I'll buy some soon. So no intercourse.
Couple days later, I bought some, we ended up in bed together again. I tell her I have some condoms, she looks nervous then confesses she's never had sex before. I was a little surprised, but I told her no pressure, and only when she wants to. A bit of time passes and she tells me she wants to try. Sweet! I condom up and she laid back. I make sure she gets nice and wet, then try to go for it.
>ohfuck.jpg
She won't relax and it's impossible for me to get inside without just forcing it. Realizing she's really nervous I sit back, and finger her until she relaxes a bit. Problem is, during this time I start losing my erection. However, manage to slide in a bit for a while, but now I'm the one unable to keep it together, lose my erection and we decide to stop.
Last night we end up in bed together again. She gets really wet, and I get really hard. I ask her if she wants to try again... and the mood shifts, she tells me she's afraid to try and fail because she thinks I'll be disappointed if it doesn't work out. I give her lots of reassurance, but we spend the whole night together again, just naked, no sex.
I'm a bit frustrated because naturally I want to sex her, but I also want her to feel comfortable, safe, and not pressured. I don't think I can spend many more nights with her, where we strip down to nothing and there's no actual sex though.
On top of this problem, I am also not sure I want to continue the relationship with her for completely unrelated reasons, but fear if this isn't resolved she will think I am uninterested because of this reason and I don't want that plaguing her mind and cause her future problems with this.
Please feel free to weigh in, call me faggot, share your own sex problems, etc.
I don't know if this helps you decide the correct code of action, but let me put it this way:
She's a virgin. Even if you plow her first then break up with her she's STILL going to be fucked up because she'll STILL assume it's sex related. Either she'll think you're a fiendish make who only used her, or she'll think that her puss sticks so bad you must decided to run for the hills.
IMO your best bet is to have a sincere, serious conversation explaining that you don't want to lead her on and that she should look for...
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If you don't want to keep seeing this girl you probably shouldn't take her virginity dude.
She probably likes you enough to let you take it but I don't think she'll appreciate it if you dump her after, popping our cherries is a big deal for most of us girls and we want it to be with someone special, not someone who just wants to fuck us then leave us.
>humblebragging on /adv/
Git out.
Is a relationship between a saver who doesnt want to spend a lot of money in travelling and a person who spends all his savings in travelling posible? I understand the saver should slightly adapt and travel a bit more more I do not think it is fair that the non saver asks the saver to be with him in all the travels so the saver would eventually not save
I think spending money on travel is better than spending money on a lot of other things. Try to maybe find a middle ground and find good deals and inexpensive places to visit, you just gotta know where to look. Travel doesn't have to be super expensive.
>>17292076
thanks pal!
>>17292076
Agreed with this anon - there's not a reason you need to fly in first class, or stay in a perfect resort each time you travel... be keen on experiencing places in different ways.
I agree that spending money on travel is one of the best ways to use your money, especially when you're young.
My parents saved up a bunch of money to travel and to be safe in retirement, and now my mom is sick. She refuses to go anywhere because it's too taxing on her, which is halfway true, but also she...
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How do the cynicals of the world date or have relationships?
>>17292022
by dating or engaging in a relationship. im not sure what you're even asking here. cynics date all the fucking time how would it stop them?
everyone calls me cynical and pessimistic and i date fine
>>17292022
I was considering making a thread asking how to get rid of my bitterness, but this thread seems to work fine; dub confirm this is the thread to lurk.
>cynicals
>date
Hahaha that's funny.
How to get rid of self-defeating behaviour?
>>17292021
>>17292026
It's gotten to the point, I suspect my subconscious is implying it
why do you want to get rid of it ?
I am seeking something, I don't know what it is.
I met a foreign woman recently and we shared the most romantic week together while she passed through on a road trip. I have never felt this connection with another human, even the one that i married. I felt young, like i discovered a part of me that i lost.
I am divorced now - I dont know what im seeking, should i fly to her and travel with her for two weeks? should i just continue to work my job and be responsible and let the universe tell me what to do??
my father is dying, I almost lost my mother...
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>>17291985
Are you the guy with the Miata?
>>17291990
Okay then get a Miata.
It will give you confidence.
TL:DR What are the negatives of smoking dope once a night to help sleep?
Hello /adv/, I don't have much experience with pot, but I started vaping with a small Magic Flight Box about two months ago. The reason is because I finally started taking medication for my ADHD (won't go into all of it but basically I did fine in highschool but now being a junior in college I need an extra push for those strenuous days of work, internship, and school). Anyway, the only downside I find to taking my Vyvanse is it makes falling asleep a bitch. The first few days I didn't...
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>>17291900
As long as you don't combust you'll avoid almost all of the negative side effects, except for a little bit of fuzz around the edge of your short term memory. I'd reccomend upgrading your genetics to a heavy indica designed for facilitating sleep such as Midnight Kush, Big Buddha, Blueberry or a similar strain. Kush genetics are especially good in my opinion. The Magic Flight Box is a great vape but if you're serious about the medical aspects of cannabis get a desktop vape like the Arizer, Volcano,...
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you just wake up foggy if u go overboard but since u pop stims i think you're fine
inb4 conservatives try to make u quit by calling you degenerate
>>17291934
>inb4 conservatives try to make u quit by calling you degenerate
You know it's true.
How do you distract yourself from physical pain when painkillers aren't helping?
My ear has been aching like a motherfucker for several hours now. I took a few painkillers, going to get medication on monday because it's a national holiday right now and all the stores are closed (fucking folk hippie shit drowning over the summer solistice) and I just have to hold out until then.
The pain isn't the worst one I've ever experienced but it's inside my fucking cranium and there's no relief from it today. A part of me wants to throw up in hopes of relief but I know it's not happening.
I have found that leaning forward or turning my head upside-down increases the pain and having my ear canal full of water mildly reduces it, but other than that, there is nothing, and the pain intensifies.
>>17291885
>>17291929
>>17291979
>>17291979
>I have found that leaning forward or turning my head upside-down increases the pain
Well, probably stop doing that then. What kind of painkillers do you have?
How to handle epic failures, anons?
When your image of yourself doesn't match reality and won't ever.
just be yourself ;^)
>>17291896
How to want to be yourself then?
