I'm feeling pretty down right now. I turned 20 today and I feel empty.
I'm not going to college. I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. I have a part time job that pays okay, but I blow most of my money on Blu-rays and music downloads. I do donate a decent amount to various organisations I support, but I'm not really saving anything.
All of my friends are still in high school. I don't want to look like Matthew McConaughey in Dazed and Confused, but I have no friends my own age that I still see.
Like Morrissey says, I am a human and I need to be loved, but there's only one girl I can see a relationship with, but I feel like I'm so far from being worthy of her. I've been jerking off to teenage actresses and models for years. Now that I'm 20 it's probably time to grow out of that habit. I don't want to simply fap to only adults. I want to quit wasting my time and energy masturbating entirely. It's just so hard. I wish I had more self-control.
I spent most of my day in bed because yesterday was really long and tiresome. I usually get some food from one of my favorite restaurants on my birthday of course, but today my dad brought some KFC for lunch, but because was asleep until he came back, I wasn't hungry so I let my brother eat it. I had an apple later. I'm not bitter about this, it's just the first time I've had a birthday that doesn't feel like a birthday at all.
I've just been sitting here thinking about my life and it's bumming me out. I'm looking at Facebook and the 17 people who wished my happy birthday. The one highlight of today is the girl I'm in love with commented.
>Happy birthday buddy!!!!!
Right now, all my hopes and dreams are contained in those three words and five exclamation points.
Thoughts?
>>17294268
>Thoughts?
stop listening to Morrissey. quoting Morrissey pigeonholes you as a depressed who wants to be depressed.
>>17294288
Not a bad idea. I used to just like the music. It's only more recently I've started noticing I relate to the lyrics. You're right about how it probably pigeonholes me though.
>it's another "I'm 20 years old and my life is over" episode
So I'm stuck in a red state and don't make enough money with two jobs to get assistance for living. I barely make $600 every month and have to live with my parents because it's not enough to live off of. I even held a manager job and all they would pay me was $10/H.
I am sick of this shit and I'm I'd say a 6-7/10 in good clothes and make up, so I was considering extreme measures to raise some money. A friend of mine suggested I camwhore, but I feel awkward about that. Flat out prostitution I don't think I could do because I'm too vanilla. Someone else suggested I just make tease videos but I know nothing about this. I've heard horror stories, but I've also heard good things on the subject when you're a decent businessperson about what you do/do not do. Does anyone have any suggestions? I was actually offered a camera service by a friend if I would agree to make porn where I take guys' virginities (willing guys, as I've been a lot of 25+ year old's firsts but that was just because we're friends) and he said I'd keep any money made off of it.
I suppose if it's a friend and I care about them, I wouldn't mind so much and it's not really prostitution because we're friends so I would care for them and not just fuck/buck/and tuck away. He said that sort of stuff would sell well. Would it?
>>17294261
>I want to be a whore, help?
Fuck off. You diminish all women.
>>17294261
600 a month with two jobs?? are you working part time jobs like an idiot? full time minimum wage would make more than that in one week.
>>17294272
A lot of people can't get or aren't offered a full time job. The new reality of America. All the jobs are in China and Mexico.
Woke up this morning with this blister on my shin.
No idea where it might be from. Its not painful or anything. I skate everyday so it could be from tight socks? But ive never had this problrm before.
Hell could it be?
It looks like an insect bite. Probably a spider.
>>17294267
Oh fuck. Should i do something?
>>17294257
I can tell by the thick greasy hair you're poo in the loo.
Clean yourself and house/hut.
I have a girlfriend that used to "fuck around" alot, and now it's looks like as we are just friends. There's also the looming thought that I will move away and I won't be able to see her anymore. What do I do? gif not related
>>17294247
Did she say that she fucked around a lot?
>>17294381
we did sexual shit is what I meant
>>17294247
What do you want to do?
So I crushed hard on this girl back in highschool and eventually asked her out. I asked if she'd like to do something sometime after talking a little bit for the first time.
I probably came off as desperate and I probably was I guess. She told me no she has a boyfriend and I just fold her oh alright, bummer. Cya!
I'm thinking of asking out more women in the future. What do you guys think of what I said?
I don't normally do this so this is why I'm asking haha.
>>17294240
its hard dude, but actually offer a place to go
paint a picture. "go somewhere sometime" is nothing, fuckin blank space. say "I want to check out this.. ??? would you like to go with me"
>>17294240
You dun gud.
How did you meet her?
>>17294356
We were walking the same way.
So, today I celebrated my 11th anniversary. Small party, some neighbors and friends came over. My wife kept introducing me to people as "her boyfriend", which she's done on and off (but mostly on) for most of our marriage.
Should I be worried? Should I divorce her?
>>17294222
If you've been married for 11 years, can't you just ask her why she does it?
>>17294249
Whenever I do, she says something along the lines of
>Oh, I'm sorry, I just keep forgetting.
>>17294270
Does she have the dumbs?
When I first meet someone, I act like a complete normi. After a few weeks, my actual personality comes out, which is likable. How do I bypass first phase when I meet people...so I don't seem like just a shitbag normie. just takes a bit to get comfortable
>>17294220
Nah that's good.
Deception by any means. I fucking like it.
>>17294220
You're not doing anything wrong, pretty sure everyone does the same first-impression, face value stuff anyway
>>17294421
gets in the way of dating and making friends tho. Seem like boring quite fuck w/ no interest until like 4th time meeting
>Be wary of autism
I can't even try anymore. There's no point. I try to talk and people laugh because I apparently talk funny. I can't tell when people are being nice and when they're mocking me. I can't have fun around other people.
I wasn't meant for this town, country, world. I just keep to myself now, hope no one talks to me.
If I killed myself no one would remember me and I'd waste my only life. I need suggestions about what to do
Idk find other autists? Not everyone is meant to play the social game.
>>17294187
Learn how to fake emotions
>>17294187
Compensate by being fuckin' ripped.
Go lift some weights.
Hi all, need some help with a girls in general. Basically i'm a 20 y old virgin dude that never messaged a girl, or even had a relationship. Dunno why, i do not consider myself ugly and/or stupid (that required some work though, low self esteem problems). Lately things changed quite a bit and i was able to set a date with a girl tthat was older than me.......we both agreed it couldn't work. It all comes up to yesterday, when i sent a friiendship request on Facebook to another girl, which according to a friend of mine should be interested in me. The problem is that i'm fucking scared, and i don't know why. The very moment i sent her a message saying "hi" i felt like shit, thinking about "wtf you doing man she won't ever like you, get over it". What The hell is wrong with me, do i just need to step out of my comfort zone and grow some balls?
>>17294183
bump
>>17294183
>What The hell is wrong with me, do i just need to step out of my comfort zone and grow some balls?
yes
/thread
>>17294183
I'd say just incrementally do stuff like this that makes you uncomfortable. Really small steps. After 10 interactions, you'll probably realize that 6-7/10 of the times it's not that bad. And even when u fuck up, it isn't that bad.
How can I motivate myself to do self-improvement shit over the summer. I just wanna sit around all day and do nothing, but I know I should be exercising/reading/learning/writing/networking.
I know there's no simple answer.
Do you have a phone that lets you download apps? There are apps that can remind you to just go do something simple like "Go on a 30 minute walk" at a time you've picked or "Do the dishes".
>>17294172
yeah, I've tried writing lists and that kind of thing. It's just so easy for some fucks to put their noses to the grindstone. The thing that really gets me to do shit is when some scary authority figure yells at me, and I'm afraid of getting yelled at.
Everybody should be doing shit like that but nobody really knows how to go about it and only a small handful of people even bother. It boils down to how hard you want to force or trick yourself into doing it.
What's the point of being black if you have no real friends and shit at basketball?
> inb4 practice. I did that shit and only got slightly better
I'm anxious as fuck, which is in fitting for a black. I swear I hate being black. Living in Brooklyn was a fucking mistake. I'm 18 what do I do
What the hell kind of advice could anyone give you?
>>17294163
Yeah I'm totally stumped here I really try hard on this board but I'm like...
"uhh...be white?"
I would say be the whitest black guy you could. They have far better outcomes. If you're a white-ass black guy with a white girlfriend a lot of people will love you these days rather than hate you. Welcome to the family, son!
i didnt mean nothin by that son part i meant like son for real i swear
>>17294160
therapy.
I was doing my own thing, and a friend of mine met eye contact with me and just shook his head at me. I interpreted this as disapproval and I stopped talking feeling left out. This has happened multiple times with different people.
>>17294136
If he is a friend, ask him what he meant. Say "why you shake your head is my hair messed up or something" something like that, maybe you will get an answer
>>17294136
It means stop talking about what you're talking about because you're making someone uncomfortable, or everyone uncomfortable, and you don't pick up on the social cues that you are doing so.
talk less listen more.
All depends on who they are. Sometimes I shake my head at my friends as a joke. You gotta ask OP.
I used to drink green tea every single night last year in 2015. I haven't drank it in 5 months because I started lifting and drinking whey shakes instead. After June started, I stopped drinking whey shakes and started drinking green tea instead. It's been about a week since I've started drinking green tea and I'm having the WORST breakout of my entire life. Is green tea causing this awful breakout to happen? I used to always drink it. In fact, last Summer was when I was still drinking it and my skin was the clearest it had ever been. I haven't changed a thing except for adding in green tea to my diet.
>>17294119
Damn that poor guy in OP's pic.
I thought my face looked bad, but damn
>>17294123
Yes, friend. There are always people out there who have it worse than you.
>>17294119
It can be a lot of factors, but depending on the green tea, it isn't helping. Some green teas can contain lots of sugars and artificial flavorings.
Drink water mostly or all the time for a week and see if it clears up.
how do you stay not depressed
a few days ago I though I changed
I started doing yoga and meditation (im a very logical and cynical person, normally I wouldnt even consider yoga) , I made plans about what to do with the rest of the year (given that since I dropped out of college 3 moths ago im home 24/7 on my copmuter)
I stopped taking my meds and the "change" occurred when I started taking them again
they made me really sleepy and messed up my already messed up sleep "schedule" (I cant sleep until like 6 to 8 am, and im sleeping like 12 hours everyday. also I cant seem to fix it)
now a couple days later I feel dead, Im at the starting point or maybe even worse
my parents want me to move back with them and I dont know If I want
honestly I dont know If id care
I know that my depression cant be cured in my parent's tho
pic unrelated
also in the past 3 months I lost 10 kg
or 22 pounds
because although I feel hungry id rather not eat than cook or go out and buy something
>>17294104
also I dropped out like 2 weeks after college started
I was already depressed, I believe ive been mildy depressed since i was 13
it was mostly anxiety back then tho
>>17294104
Try to see the changes in your life as a potential path to something better for yourself.
Those meds sound fucked up though. What are they for?
>21 Spironolactone 25mg
>~20 Carvedilol 25mg
>14 Fluoxetine HCL 20mg (Prozac)
>30 Aripiprazole 5mg (Abilify)
>~350 Asprin 81mg
>11 Hydrochlorothiazide 25mg
>~30-40 Ibuprofen 200mg
>~15 Fluvoxamine 100mg
>~15 Lisinopril 40mg
Also, if survived, would said person be at risk of any serious brain damage?
No
Yes
pills is a cry for help, if you want to commit suicide you will find a place more than 5 stories up and fall off it. you will not survive.
>>17294100
>>17294120
This...if there really is no way of getting out of the way you feel and you feel like suicide is the only way
>>17294133
But reading stories about people that jumped but lived said they shouldn't have jumped half way through falling