Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2157. page
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Need major /adv/ice here.
I'm on my 2nd year in uni, studying psychology. I've yet to find out what suits me (had some mild thoughts of going for clinic) and I still struggle to explain my would-be job from a practical point of view... so lately I've been thinking of switching to medicine.
What happened to me? I had passion and I was rather happy of getting here. How come I'm starting to give up so easily, so soon?
>tl;dr OP is a faggot who can't decide between two universities.
I know this board moves kind of slowly and I'm nonchalantly asking for major life advice, but I could really use some help right now, so... bumping.
Last bump. Please anyone, have mercy on me.
both are absolute shit, you won't be happy in either job. guaranteed.
I thought I had finally gotten the break I've been waiting for. Started going out with a girl and it seemed to be going well. I thought hey, maybe this medication is working and I'm just exuding this air of confidence I seemed to be lacking.
This morning she said she'd rather just be good friends, and that I have a "super personality " but she started liking someone else. Old me would have seen it coming.
I've tried tinder and okc and all that bullshit and none of it has gotten me anywhere. I've been exposed to a number of "growing up ugly" memes and I identify with all of them. Not wanting to be a defeatist, however, I redownloaded tinder today. Spent all of my likes and matched with two bots. Went through my old messages from last time and found this treasure.
Feeling the depression I thought I was finally over coming back. I'm so sick of being alone. I'm so sick of feeling like I'm behind the curve. I've busted my ass trying to make my life better and nothing has worked out. What do I do?
When all else fails get money.
When you have money, everyhting else comes together.
>>16501427
I'm not one of those people who can ask their fathers for a small loan of a million dollars. I'm not doing bad for where I am in life and where I started but if we're talking lambo money that's a few decades off. And I don't know that I can wait a few decades for life to be enjoyable.
>>16501440
>I don't know that I can wait a few decades for life to be enjoyable.
You'll have to.
Welcome to male life.
You're either born rich or spend 20 years getting money and then fuck girls 20 years younger than you.
It's all about money.
If you have questions about what path to take, take the one that leads to riches.
Am I a bad person?
I am constantly afraid that deep down inside I am a bad person.
I have so many gut reactions and feelings and emotions that I know I shouldn't have and they always make me feel like I am terrible.
For example, I get extremely jealous when my girlfriend talks to other guys and shows any sort of fondness of them
I'm get jealous of friends who I feel are better than me and feel angry about it
I get insecure about stupid shit like my girlfriend wanting a tattoo or that she wants to be a plumber and it makes me feel insecure because I have no hands on skills.
I'm sometimes controlling without realizing I'm being controlling
I'm judgmental of other people and cyncial of everything.
I'm argumentative and hold grudges.
That all said, I'm aware of all of these things, I don't try to feel them its just what happens. And Whenever I feel these ways I hate myself for feeling like that. I never EVER let myself act on these feelings though. I always act in the way I know I should. I support my friends and my GF and bite my tongue when I feel jealous or grudges. I try my fucking hardest to live as what I see a good person. I'm just afraid to my very core that deep down im this sack of shit. Everyone else seems to naturally just non judgmental and easy going where as I have these bitter feelings rotting inside of me.
My therapist says that its not about how we feel its how we act and the fact that I'm aware and I don't let my feelings control me is proof that I am a good person and that if I work on it I won't feel that way anymore. Its just, how do you stop feelings that happen like reflex? That pop into your head even before thoughts form?
Eh, you aren't alone. Lots of people are constantly plagued by shitty thoughts and feelings. Your therapist is right though, actions are more important. It probably wouldn't hurt to find a partner you can share your thoughts and feelings with in a rational way. Jealously isn't as bad when you're honest and straight forward about it instead of hiding it away and hurting others in order to make them afraid to have independence.
>>16501378
>For example, I get extremely jealous when my girlfriend talks to other guys and shows any sort of fondness of them
insecure
>I'm get jealous of friends who I feel are better than me and feel angry about it
insecure
>I'm sometimes controlling without realizing I'm being controlling
normal
>I'm judgmental of other people and cyncial of everything.
assholeish
>I'm argumentative and hold grudges.
insecure
from what i can tell op, you're not a bad person, you're bad at being a person, and very insecure.
>>16501392
I share with her I'd say about 50% of the time, or whenever I've managed to work through my feelings on something. She's always been fantastic and supportive and thinks I beat myself up way to much over everything and that I've always been fantastic to her.
I just don't bring it up all the time because I'm afraid of bogging our relationship down with constantly telling her how fucked up I feel about certain things, or how insecure things make me, I'm also afraid she will see me as being a control freak or a bitter jealous person sometimes. She never does.
>>16501397
Well yes I could tell you that. But how do I become secure? I've been fucking trying for years and nothing seems to work. I started lifting years ago and god fit, I found decent work, I got an amazing girlfriend who loves me and wants to move in with me, I have fantastic friends.
And yet there's this deep dark insecurity that I just can not shake.
hey /adv/, gotta kill self, whats a good way to kill myself with my car thats painless?
do a backflip
>Step 1
Don't kill car
>Step 2
Don't kill self
Problem solved, you're welcome.
>>16501320
You don't "have to" kill yourself, it's your choice. And death is painful.
"Hey are you guys hiring?"
"Yeah! Do you need an application?"
"Yes."
"Here. Fill this out and come talk to the manager."
20 minutes later"I filled it out."
"Let me get the manager."
A. "Alright. So you're basically a clean slate I see. OK what are some of your feats?
"Nothing really. I have little to no exp and I need someone to give me a chance."
"If I gave you a job here, could I count on you to be here on time, dressed, cleaned up and ready to go? And you're over 18. That's good."
"Yes sir/ma'am"
"I'll give you a call. Is this a good number to reach you?"
"Anytime"
B. I'm sorry, but we are not hiring at this time, however we will keep your application on file for the time being for the next 6 months if something comes up."
"Thanks..."
later on ..."Yes. I was wondering about my interview and how I did if there was anything I didn't do right..."
"No, you did great, it's your lack of exp with jobs. We need someone that has already gained the exp to do what we want."
"Oh..."
"Sorry. Best of luck to you!"
OK so explain to me, how the hell I'm suppose to get fucking hired ANYWHERE if every god damn job is the same? If every god damn job wants B more than A? Why? WHY? I don't fucking get it."
>>16501303
You gotta get a shitty job first brah, like at a grocery store or some shit.
Just got a job at Panera. Never worked a day in my life
Volunteer work or do a course you stupid fuck. Is it really that hard?
not sure if this should go here but i want somewhere outside of /b/. so, my memory. i have very, and i mean very few memories of anything more than 10 years old. i remember a little more when i was in high school, but not much. i moved around a lot when i was young (foster care) and when i was in high school (back with mother dear at 15. did not turn out well.) i only really remember one friends name, and none of the friends i made in high school. i have a few more memories during the time in foster care but even those are sparse. i've had people add me on facebook that knew me but i straight up do not remember them and accept their request and try to remember. sometimes something clicks but more often than not it doesn't. i've been told i had a shitty life but most of it i do not remember. even my ex wife (divorced a year ago, separated 2 1/2ish) memories of the beginning of the relationship with her are fading more and more. that was 11 years ago, i'm 31 now. i've known about this problem since i was 20. it hasn't really had any effect on education.
is there anyone else like this? if not should i do something about it? should i do something about it any way?
I remember only a few things from my childhood up to 7, i started to wonder when i heard other people my age (21) always remembering so much more than me. I think the reason is simply that we moved at 7 and have never been back, so i were never reminded of anything except what i could remind myself of in my head. So if you moved alot, thats my theory. It seems more severe though
>>16501253
yeah, i moved a lot, different house every few months for a long time. but even my best memories are still hazy no matter the location or duration. i was with one family for over a year and don't even really remember that. but i guess that's a definite possibility.
>>16501269
What about situations it should be hard to forget? Emotional impacts and such ?
How do we tell our friend that his wife is a dirty scandalous slut?
>friends with group of 6 guys for last 15ish years
>one of my friends older brother(who we're not that close with) went to prison 6 months ago and will be in for another year or two
>since then his wife and mother of his two young children has attached herself to my friend and by extension, our group
>it was good at first because she brought some new girls around for us
>we find out from one of her friends she's trying to fuck around with some other guy she met on the internet
>that same night before we can confront her about it she goes off with my drunk friend to fuck him
>she breaks down crying the next day spewing endless excuses and tells us not to say anything to her husband because she needs to tell him herself
>since then it's been two months and she has tried to escalate things sexually with every single guy we hang out with regularly
>there's no evidence but we're 100% sure she's fooled around or even fucked 3 guys
>we're all conflicted but we can't exactly cut her loose and the pussy she brings around is a strong influence for the group as a whole
Do we tell him when he gets out or do we let him stew with it?
I'm at a loss for words with her
Tell him now. If he's weak willed then he will immediately confront her at which point she will break out the crocodile tears and make a hundred excuses. In person he might forgive her and give her another chance. Let him sit in prison and think about it for awhile and his anger will build up to the point that even seeing her cry and make shit up won't move him to forgive her. Also you guys are shit tier friends for continuing to hang out with her. Would not want to ever count you among my friends.
Let him know so if she visits she has enough time to break up with him and not die.
>>16501155
When does he get out?
I feel like a disappointment to this guy thats been crushing on me for a while (i like him too but ill explain) . See we are both 18-19 and i just want to focus on college and myself.
Hes always been really sweet to me, buying me gifts, saying nice things to me, making me feel special, but i told him on a date that i just wanted to stay friends and that i wasnt interested in having a boyfriend right now. Im pretty sure he thinks i just dont like him, but thats just not the case.
Was this a reasonable thing to do? he seemed very distraught and i feel really bad about it.
>>16501136
>hes always nice to me
>buys me gifts
>takes me on dates
>for some reason doesn't tell him no straight up
>wallows in gifts and money until you have a new interest
>then tell him no
You're a bitch who enjoys getting attention and presents along with money. Like most women.
>>16501136
>Was this a reasonable thing to do?
yes
>he seemed very distraught and i feel really bad about it.
he'll get over it quickly enough.
>>16501154
Becasue buying a present means she has to ride the D.
Running from all my problems...they're haunting me...
>only poison sets me free...
>>16501102
Oh so you dont need advice. This thread would be more suited to /r9k/
>>16501103
how so?
>>16501102
or you could get a job, save some money and stop being a dumb ass
I'm a short male human being. I'm not even that short, I'm 5'8 (1.73), but I really feel uncomfortable with my height. I get obsessed by anyone's height, I Google the height of every celebrity I see, I compare heights of all my friends (and the irony gave me two 6'4 guys as best friends) and the first thing I see when I meet someone is their height, and if they're taller I get over jealous. Once a girl refused me saying "you know you're really really cute but we're tall the same and since I love wearing hi heels when I go out it would be emberassing going on a date with you". Also I'm a basketball fan and this doesn't help with my self-esteem. Pic super related.
>>16500908
Get the fuck over yourself.
Shit, I'm smaller than you are and nobody besides 4chan gave two fucks about it.
>>16500908
When I lived in Texas, I saw a lot of tall guys. Every guy I dated there was well over 6 feet. When I moved to the west coast, tall guys are extremely rare. The only tall people I see on campus are the guys on the basketball team. Everyone else is somewhere between 5'8 to 6 feet tall. Does this mean people on the west coast are all forever alones? Absolutely not. None of my male friends have trouble getting women. So... like >>16500923
said, get over yourself. Normal people in the real world don't give nearly the amount of fucks you or 4chan does.
>>16500908
You're taller than Tom Cruise.
Hey /adv/ What obnoxious things can I do once I finally get a gf? I want to show people that their relationships are casuals. Money is not an issue in this equation.
>>16500880
Buy her an island & name it after her childhood pet dog that died.
>>16500890
Ok we're talking realistic here, not many islands are for sale.
>>16500892
Buy her a house.
>Coworkers found out I'm a virgin
>Are constantly giving me shit for it
the night shift guys are cool but I only work one night.
I'm ugly as fuck and broke so theres no chance of me fixing it that way.
Should I quit and get a new job?
>>16500846
Why don't you ask them to hook you up?
>>16500875
I am very ugly. It wont happen.
Even then I don't want to have sex outside of committed relationships.
Stab one of them
What do you have to lose?
I'm not sure what to do. I pretended to be a normie well enough to get invited to a party. The only thing is that I am socially inept and have terrible social anxiety but I don't want to sperg out. How do I pretend to be cool at a party?
The guy who invited me also said that there is some Stacy that he talked me up to and she wants to meet me. I'm 99% sure that she will be disappointed once she sees what I actually look like so how do I avoid the inevitable awkward situation? The more I think about it the more I just want to not show up. The only thing is that the guy who invited me is also my co worker so if I change my mind at the last minute he will forever hate me.
What should I do?!
>>16500793
Get drunk, act a fool, everyone will laugh, good times shall be had.
Or, that guy knows that you're some weirdo and has just invited you to the party so that Stacy can get you all worked up only to pull the rug out from under you at the last second and leave you sitting there holding your limp dick in your hands while everyone at the party laughs at you.
>>16500793
go there looking your best, expecting nothing
chads and staceys have better things to do than plot for days and use each other as bait just to laugh at a socially inept guy
>>16500793
Or, instead of being a pessimistic douche with a self fulfilling prophecy of failure, you go meet this girl and charm the pants off her.
So, I've been talking to a guy I met online for a while now, he tells me he loves me a lot and then after a while i fell in love too. I highly doubt he is a catfish or anything, I've seen and heard him on skype many many times, I know his full name and I know he is actually who he says he is. I believe what he says and his love is real, I hope.. What my problem is that he completely disappeared, he hasn't been replying to anything for over a week, he's offline everywhere. I have no idea what happened, he just suddenly disappeared. I love him and I'm very worried, I have a way of contacting a family member of his and asking for information but I don't wanna seem like a creep. I don't know what to do. It feels like he's been gone for so long and he's starting to seem like a stranger i once knew, but still i miss him a lot. Should I contact the family member or just keep waiting? I don't wanna ruin anything and seem like a creep but I really need to know what happened (I know he goes on 4chan so if this seems familiar to you, if you are him then get back to me and explain!)
>>16500782
Maybe he's on vacation and forgot to tell you. Probably not though.
You should set a limit of time after which you will ask somebody else where he is because you haven't heard of him for a long time. If she wants to ditch you then he should say so and not just disappear.
>>16500790
>>16500790
No he's definitely not on a vacation or anything. I don't believe he just ditched me but I guess anything could be possible. and i'm not sure what's a good amount of time until I ask someone else for info, that's pretty much what i'm asking advice for
How old is he, maybe he got grounded. Could be that he is just too immature. That's where my money is. Be ready to ditch this dude if there was not some good reason for going off the grid like getting busted or hit by a car or something that would validly keep him from even giving you a heads-up.
Refresh your PC is still happening, it's been more than a day, how long does it last? And was it worth ?
While taking drugs might seem fun, they feel so good you have no desire to do anything else or improve, and when you grow old you realize you have no skills or talent.
>>16500759
stay off drugs, kids, or this is the kind of posts you'll be making in the wrong threads all the time
>>16500787
Seems like you dechiphered the binarys of OP's cryptic message, care to share it with the normal people you nerdy you?
