Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2135. page
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Guys, say you are in this situation
>friends with a girl
>she says she's into you
>you say you're not interested but want to stay friends
>she distances herself with time
>you anchor her back
>she distances herself again
>you anchor her back once more
>it goes on in this cycle for a year now
Why would you do that? I mean, what's the point trying to keep friendship which is already tainted with other feels and why bother with a chick who clearly has enough of this emotional rollercoaster? Can someone explain that to me?
It's completely the girl's fault for not just removing herself from the situation
>>16514484
I agree. The girl is just as much in fault, if not more so, because she knows she can't have a normal friendship. She keeps going back, then expecting more or realizing that out won't work, leaving then repeating the cycle. She will never have a healthy relationship with anybody at this point. She needs to distance herself for real and quit the bullshit emo games.
>>16514484
Agreed, the girl is weak–willed, but what's up with the guy pushing so hard to keep in touch? Is it domination thing or being mean?
So my asshole bleeds.
For the past week, I have noticed that everytime I wipe my butt after taking a shit, there's a tiny little bit of blood on the toilet papet.
Yes, I'll go to a doctor soon, but for now:
Can anybody tell me what might it be?
I have noticed no other changes.
Thanks
'roids
Had that a lot in the past, I never bothered to have it checked. Still alive today, no bleeding asshole no more.
Possibly hemorrhoids?
my boyfriend stuffs his dick in my pussy and it hurts every time we have sex. the first time he had tied me up (he's into bdsm and stuff so i went along with it), i had not seen how big he was before i agreed to it. it hurt so bad but he forced it in me anyway and i was literally in tears from the actual pain of him fukcing me. he stopped a few times but he just jackhamered me at the end. hes not only got a fat dick but its also 8.3 inches long...last time we fucked was the third time that it hurt this bad and i'm wondering if i need to break up with him over this
do you like him? try talking to him about it
also, what was your reaction when you found out he was hung?
talk to him about it first, if he decides to pass the limits again then you will know if he's someone who respects you or not
>>16514332
1) TALK TO HIM! Tell him "your dick is too big and I need time to accomodate it. Go slow, and pile on the lube and foreplay."
2) Do a lot of thinking of whetther the guy is an idiot, or a sadist, or a plain old asshole. If he's an asshole, dump him. If he's a sadist, and you're not into pain, dump him. If he's an idiot, and you don't have patience for that, dump him. Otherwise, try to see this through.
3) TALK TO HIM SOME MORE.
4) Why did you agree to fuck him after the first time, if it hurt so bad?
NEET here moving into an apartment i bought using money mom gave me. What do i do? The apartment costs me $600 a month to have (with a loan) and each room can be rented out for ~$450-500/month. Should i rent out 1 or 2 rooms and if so which one should i live in myself? Apartment is ~1200 sq ft
rent out all three and live in a one bedroom by yourself.
>>16514006
>each room can be rented out for ~$450-500/month.
No one will pay $450 for a room when the whole place is $600.
Your best bet is to split it 50-50 with someone who is responsible.
>>16514032
>No one will pay $450 for a room when the whole place is $600.
OP owns the place. that people will pay that is the whole reason landlords exist.
so my life turned to shit pretty fast. I'm gonna green text since I'm not in a writing out my sob story mood right now....
>lost job, earlier this Nov, last day is december 3
>working on my exit in the meantime and that last paycheck will be needed.
>Friend saw my GF of 3 years with some other guy downtown and tells me
>confront her
>found out GF was seeing someone else these past 2 months
>Leave before I hit her, luckily we don't live together
>spent the earlier part of last week drunk, day and night, alone.
>Jim Bean kinda grows on you...
>sober up Wednesday morning
>talk with GF, she doesn't want me to leave from her life
>fuck that shit, will go nuclear in this restaurant if we keep talking
>confessed everything, what they've been doing, when they meet and plan to meet
>offered me the text logs, pics, everything...even other person's Instagram
>find about 10 of pics of them together
>this mofo doesn't know about me
>this mofo is super happy he got his first "girlfriend"
>she looks happy...
>literally haven't seen her that happy in a long time
>"Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Forever"
>3 week break, let me see if we can be friends
>Went home for Thanksgiving
>Dad starts telling me how I much of a failure I am
>Dad became sober 4 years ago, so all I had to chug down was cans of coke
>40 cans of that for the rest of the week.
>I can live with sugar crashes...
Part of me hopes that me being gone will make her miss me more than the other guy and she breaks it off with the other guy. No fucking idea how this happened, guessing it was because I was working all the time and didn't spend so much time with her. Boils down too I lost my job and my girl in the same month...my stomach and liver stayed strong not eating anything but alcohol for 3 days. Chugging water now to say sorry to my beaten body.
I understand that priority is finding a job to keep on living (Thanks Capitalism). Any comments or advice on my situation?
>>16513911
First off, cut the "im a victim fuck capitalsim" schtik.
Man the fuck up. Fuck your girlfriend, fuck that job. Take some fucking responsibility and go out and make yourself better.
Turn this shitty feeling into something positive.
Just Do It.
Make it happen anyway you can. You'll be happy this shit happened, you'll be kicking ass in 4 years
Ditch the girl. Fuck yourself for even considering getting back with her.
>Thanks capitalism
Don't even get me started. You couldn't make much more of a pleb statement if you tried.
Ditch her and sort your life out. Forget about her. If she ever pops up in your head don't follow the thought down some depressing road, just think fuck her, she cheated, her loss. Use it as motivation to do good things from here on out until you don't give a fuck about her anymore.
>comments or advice
don't be friends with your ex who cheated on you. She didn't even just cheat on you by sleeping with a stranger or something, that's full on affair shit. She would not be a good friend.
So you drank to much one week. Your job and relationship ended. does not sound like a big deal. are you an alcoholic or something? That you talk about alcohol so much when it does not seem at all important and that your dad is makes it seem pretty likely.
Just focus get a new job and stop talking to her, especially the details about what she did with him.
Which suicide method is the least likely to fail and cause permanent disability?
Set yourself on fire
jump off of a high place somewhere nobody will see or hear you.
Friend yourself to the chimpanzees at the zoo
Together 2.5 years, broke up like 2 months ago because of distance and her losing feelings. Broke my heart but was getting over it.
I messaged her a couple of times that week and she was cold, so i stopped. Last week she sends me a picture of her face saying hey... I say hey back but imagine its a mistake. A few days later she adds me back on skype where i deleted her, and messages me all like "you deleted me ;( i miss the good old times <3 we really need to talk things out cuz i feel we didnt end things properly..." Etc. so we talk again later that night but never ended up talking things out, but she ended saying "i need to sleep though, classes really early :)... So i think we should talk some other time. See you anon <3".
And that was the last time we spoke, a week ago now, and she hasnt logged on since as i expected. I dont even know if she will message again but i somewhat expect she will. SHE was the one who said we should talk again... So if she messages me, what do i do? Keep in mind i kind of want to win her back if i can, but if not its ok. She keeps asking if ive met someone or fucked someone. Should i tell her i did meet someone? Should i ignore her? Or should i keep talking and just be casual and funny like our last convo?
Cut yourself off, block her on everything, it's the only way.
>>16513762
I understand and expected that response. But what if i still genuinely care about her as a person? Keep in mind, we ended things relatively well, mostly because of distance, and she is a girl who has battled depression and has issues in her life. And i know, i guess she doesnt need me anymore. But at the same time i find it hard to just abandon her without any word... Should i ever message her asking if she wants to have that talk? And tell her if she doesnt think well work out and doesnt feel she needs my help, that i will ill need to say goodbye for good to her? I mean, before this last convo i just figured she didnt give a fuck and forgot about me... But clearly she is somewhat... Upset about it at least
>>16513756
>>16513762
This. OP, she just wants to keep you around as a last resort. Do not fall for this.
You said it yourself, she wanted to talk things out but didn't when she had the chance.
>i find it hard to just abandon her without any word
I know that feeling, yet it is the only way if you don't want to get hurt.
By all means, if you want to stay friends, then be friends. However I do not see you two being happy together in the future.
So I made a tinder profile with a female friend of mine to kill time and she had a fuckton of matches. 99% were retarded and boring, so we deleted her tinder profile.
It makes me wonder, however, is this like for every woman out there? Do all the idiots start off with a "hey" or "what's up" or "hey, where are you from?"? It's fucking annoying and boring.
Any male "models" that could chime in? I personally get maybe 5 matches per 100 likes (I'm picky, so no fat chicks and no uggos or niggers) and was wondering what it was like for others.
>>16513630
are you new to life?
im a social retard autist robot and even I know girls get 3287476482746238 times more attention than guys
a guy has a 1 in a 100 chance of a match and a girl has a 1 in a 100 chance she wont get a match
>>16513635
i didn't say i don't know that. i'm in fact very aware of it, just wondering what other anons had to say from experience, especially on the boring amount of people. hell, half of the matches didn't start a chat at all lol.
>>16513635
You're clearly young or just stupid.
Yes, women have the advantage when they are younger; however, men have the advantage when they are older.
Tinder is something that is anathema to most young men because women have more say; but, that comes with a lot of sexualisation and harassment as well.
Grow up or open your fucking mind.
The other day in class we were taking a test and the teacher is anal and wont let us leave the room. I really had to piss and I was trying to hold it through the test but I've always had a weak bladder. I couldn't make it and I pissed myself badly and visibly right before i finished. Worst part is the girl i like is in my class. I literally ran out of the classroom when it ended and burst into tears once nobody could see me, i was so fucking humiliated. I don't know how to play it off. What do?
Withdraw if its not to late to get a refund. If it is man up and piss before class.
>>16513460
I sometimes dont realize I have to piss until it's bad, in this case I didn't realize until the beginning of class and it was a double period
Im a fucking freak who still has pee accidents what the fuck should i do
I'm 19 years old, male and a virgin. I'm not too tall, not too academically excellent, nor socially, nor athletically. My entire life has been spent by me whining about how I should have not been born, or how everyone hates me, Crying about the most banal things I remember doing this even at 7, and even now: I haven't evolved past that point. Since, I'm so socially secluded that all the friendships, I do form I always end up getting super clingy, I have always wanted to feel special (recently drove away a girl who liked me because of this) I'm obsessed with the idea, and the only person who ever thought i meant something to him, I ignored him, I'm not intimidating and not authoritative. Ever since I was young being the naive kid that I was my strategy was to have others pity me, and use that to avoid confrontations fights and everything. I let people call me names, I have no friends, no job experience, and I don't know how to make friends or have conversations with people I don't know. I can't flirt, I can't be sexually attractive. I'm afraid of people, they scare me. frankly. But I'm tired of all of this, I'm tired of being pathetic, I legitimately want to change. I want to be attractive I want to be smart,I want to be social, I want to be athletic,I want to get good grades, but I don't know where to begin and I"m so afraid of change. I really want to stop being so pathetic, but I just can't bring myself to change. I want to be a person others respect, I want to be a person who doesn't start crying every time something bad happens to him.Where do I even begin?
Either you'll use your misery as fuel to change or you'll wallow in it. It's your choice anon
>>16513409
Normally when I read that, I say I wish it were that easy, saying it gives people the impression, I don't want to change But no, I want to change. The thing is I have chosen to whine about it, rather than actually do anything about it. My brain thinks I'm doing something, it's temporarily release, from actually doing it. I need do something, but my misery alone not makes me whine.
>>16513434
Make a simple goal to better yourself and do it. Repeat until you die
Hi /adv/, I'm not a common poster anywhere on 4 chan but I didn't know where else to go.
My dog, boomer, who is 6, cannot walk with his rear legs, he has a hoarse bark and his condition is quickly deteriorating. He spends most of his day on the sofa in pic related and to find out what is wrong with him, it will cost £800.
With Christmas coming up, and in a family of 7, including father and mother, we will not have a Christmas just to find out what is wrong with him, and even then he may be put down.
Help me and my family please, I don't know what to do.
Gtfo newfag
what kind of dog is it? it may be a prob specific to your dog breed.
>>16513325
Cocker spaniel
Has anybody of you every sucessfully overcome an addiction of any kind? What was the thing that madenyou pull trough?
There is a controversial thesis going around now that addiction is not as biologically grounded as we once thought, but is largely behavioural.
I'd recommend adjusting not only your intake of a particular substance, or whatever thing it may; but also your environment and social circles.
I do not know from first-hand experience though. Godspeed.
>>16513297
I know someone who used to be an alcoholic. He stayed drunk for years nonstop but he said when he started vomiting blood, he realized he needed to get his shit together and quit. From the way he tells it, he kinda just quit cold turkey and sheer willpower helped him quit. He says if you can make it past the withdrawals its easy from then on. But the withdrawals almost killed him.
What're you addicted to?
I was an IV meth/heroin addict for about 5 years. It's not hard to drop, it's hard to stay away from ime.
I've been sober about 3-4ish months, unless you count drinking once every two weeks not being sober.
To initially get sober, I first got through withdrawals, and then I started reading SMART recovery literature. It's a program based on CBT, REBT, and other shit lol. No cult-like spiritual voodoo-ism, just self-empowering tools to help you get sober and stay sober.
The problem is using drugs becomes like an instinct, you don't even think about it, you just do it, like eating or sleeping. This is usually the argument for "it's a disease, not a choice", but I don't buy that. You can choose not to eat if you're hungry. It'll suck, but you can do it. You have a choice, just like doing dope.
I'm a freshman, and I went to the wrong college. I want to transfer with every bone in my body, but I just don't know if it's the right choice.
I didn't get into any of my reach schools. In fact, I wasn't really thrilled with any of the schools that I got into, but the ones that I got into all gave me a TON of money in merit scholarships, so I couldn't really complain.
I ended up going to a school that's way smaller than I wanted, and is in a pretty shitty location, but they offered me over half tuition to attend, and their academic programs are exactly what I need.
What I didn't know before coming here is that ~75% of the student population comes from within an hour of the school (it's in Pennsylvania, I'm from Maine), and as a result it's very cliquey, sheltered, boring, and extremely High School-ish. The location is TERRIBLE, there is nothing to do on the tiny campus, and the surrounding area is not only economically depressed, but sooooo boring. I got rid of my depression senior year of HS, but it's back worse than ever. I hate the social scene, the parties suck, and I don't really get along with many of the people there (although I do have some good friends), I haven't so much as hooked up with anyone since I got here.
So I really want to leave, but they give me so much money, the academics fit my needs, I'm in the honors program, and I just don't know if it's worth it. Anyone been in a similar situation/ have advice?
I promise you, transferring to another school is not going to fix your problems. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and make an effort
>>16512583
Here I am, freaking out about how Im going to finish the degree I need to survive, with a possible war exploding at any moment and an economic collapse and you're complaining about bloody boring parties. Drop out and stop wasting everyone's time.
>>16512609
It really pisses me off when people use the "someone has it worse than you, so you cant be upset" argument. There's someone out there that's someone's sex slave, there's someone out there who's a homeless quadriplegic, that doesn't mean you aren't valid in your complaints. We all have different lives, and different tolerance for hardship.
When I have a son I'm going to name him Mustardseed after the character in a Midnight Summer's Dream, it's a British name.
Can ad/v think of a cool name for a girl to accompany Mustardseed?
>>16512536
Ketchupseed
Mydadhatesme
>>16512753
What problem do you have with the name Mustardseed for a boy?
I get sad a lot because I'm lonely, and I feel lots of other things from other things too.
There is nobody in my life that I can use as an emotional release for any of my feelings. I get shut out of every persons life who I try to become closer with, and I am continuing to try to make close friends.
All I want from this thread are effective methods at releasing my emotions.
I've cried for multiple days in a row, I create visual art to express myself, I sing along to songs that I can relate to, I write in a diary, I fap when I feel like it would help, and I am learning how to play an instrument to play music.
Please tell me some things that have helped release your emotions /adv/
>>16511541
Workout. It's a meme for a reason.
Stop crying like a bitch, you aren't 12 and you are forming a habit.
>>16511541
Study cultural economics. The cultural aspect has made it so that for me I could release my emotions by doing art related things. It's a great route, you should give it a try.
>>16511555
No, medicine and business stuff is better. Helping people is a great passion of mine.
![4544827697_6f73866999_b[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/oPpwozA.jpg "4544827697 6f73866999 b[1]")
