Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2108. page
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So this whole week I've been trying to beat anxiety and depression naturally, anyone have any tips to add?
So far I've been exercising, meditating, staying hydrated, eating healthy, and now trying neurotransmitter vitamins like 5-htp. I've been feeling a lot better but I'd like to try my best from here on out. I've read brain waves like alpha/beta/theta waves etc can help, anyone have any luck with these?
Don't forget sleep.
>>16531637
eat healthy. exercise. poop a lot. caffeine pills and aspirin helps a lot. lots of vitamins. having a satisfying, long, conversation session with a girl you really like...
yes, staying hydrated too with gatorade.
>>16531637
also, make more money, plan a trip to tokyo, buy something kind of expensive you really want...
mostly, stay really healthy tho.
I've been invited to a surprise birthday party/bar crawl tonight for a girl I slept with once but am not actually close with. We don't talk. The party would be almost entirely people I don't know (mostly basic frat girls, most of which have boyfriends). I think I was invited because it was assumed I'm closer with this girl than I actually am. There's a small chance I might get laid, but I doubt it.
The party is a 2 hour drive away. Chances are I'd end up sleeping on the floor of my roommate's dorm, drunk at 3am. However I might meet new people and network a bit.
Do the pros outweigh the cons? Do I go?
The girl would have told people if she didn't want you around, so go.
>>16531629
It's a surprise birthday party. She has no idea it's happening, or that I would be there.
>>16531631
No, before. She would have said negative things before.
Towards the end of last week, I noticed that there were some red spots on my penis. Some are somewhat close to another but theres no real discernible pattern of clustering. They just appear as mild red spots while dry, though once in the tub/shower their centers have a white core that shows itself. I have popped a few earlier, and the core was kind of solid. The area bled just like if you had popped a zit and scabbed, after the scab was gone the redness was still there. I'm not sure if this is an STI or just a skin condition in an unfortunate spot. Any thoughts on what it could be?
>>16531621
If only there were medical professionals who could give you a definitive answer on questions you had about your health... Man that would be nice wouldn't it? Maybe one day...
>>16531621
go get it checked...
do you touch yourself particularly roughly? do you use weird stuff on your penis? have you had sex recently?
i have a dry patch on my scrotum, about the site of a nickel. it's been like that since college. i've had my urethra swapped with a qtip and blood work done after receiving oral sex from a native american chick i met at walmart, but the tests revealed i have no STDs,
still have that dry patch though...
white/red pus filled pimples might be more serious tho
>>16531621
cancer , im not a doktor but ive seen cancer dick plenty . post a pic for a better answer
How can I find a job that I'd actually like to stick with? All of my jobs I was so miserable. I have little to no skills or talent. I don't know what my dream job could be. I just want to earn enough money so I'm not struggling. I WANT to get a sedentary job (one where I can sit) due to disabilities, but I don't know where to start.
I don't want to struggle financially. I don't want to be exploited. I don't want to be looked down upon because of my position. I want to be respected and maybe even appreciated. I want to be treated like an actual person and not a disposable, expendable resource to be thrown away.
I have not gone to college or uni simply because I didn't want to. Besides, almost everyone these days has degrees. If it helps, and if I still get to see my boyfriend, I could go to a trade school. But I really know nothing about those.
help
>>16531471
If you didn't go to college, you are pretty much stuck with grunt-tier, minimum wage jobs that are not so fun.
I did a gap year and 2/3 of my jobs was miserable with shit bosses. I love one job. I found it via networking. It was seasonal though and they didn't hire me though.
>>16531471
My recommendation?
Get working holidays visas and travel the world.
Yup, if you pop up in another country with no networks, you'll just end up in similar jobs in country #2. Doing this is not a problem for you though - you are stuck in similar jobs locally so there is not risk for you in doing that. (ie you are not giving up a nice job that you may not get back) For some reason, most people found their working holiday experiences to be very rewarding though.
>>16531478
Why should I be stuck with shitty jobs just because I didn't have the money for college/uni? I really don't understand
help, im caught in the post-virgin college vicious cycle.
i've never been with the same girl twice and I've never had sex that lasted a full minute. not because I came but because as soon as I start I realize how bad I am at it and stop right away.
I know that to get better at sex you have to have a lot of it, but girls are always so disappointed that they never stick around long enough for me to try again. on top of that, After the one hookup they're usually gone, then I can go months or years without finding a new girl.
what do? how fix?
Do meth, increases stamina.
Or hire a prostitute and practice on her/him
my 2nd problem, part 2 if you will:
>be me, find qt that I hit it off really well with
>she lives a couple hours away
>have been in contact for a long time but only recently had opportunities to hook up
>first night she seems really affectionate and forward
>terrible sex, literally 15 seconds before I said aloud "this is terrible"
>after that she seemed to not really care one way or the other about me
>she won't talk to me unless I badger her, I've talked to her once in the last two weeks.
>she didn't even wish me a happy birthday
should I say something or just quietly drift away? i had mixed feelings about the whole thing. maybe its already over? in which case i probably shouldn't even bring it up cause shes probably forgotten about me. OR none of this is true and shes sad, in which case how can I gauge objectively whether or not its worth pursuing, given everything?
Clearly you have more than one problem.
How do i get a gf
I don't know, if I would I wouldn't be lurking /adv/ so much.
>try to look your best whenever you leave the house
>talk to girls
>show interest but do not be a creep
>every rejection is a valuable experience
That and some luck, and skills, etc..
Spend 3 years lifting and making money. Then spend the rest of your life doing the same.
Honestly I started getting good at my passion and its finally starting to attract women. But then again I cook for almost 80-90 hours a week so I got gud. I might get a gf or fuck buddy on Monday wish me luck its be to long for me. You'll get there OP I'm not even good looking
So I just found it I have the clap, I know who gave it to me. I want to shame the shit out of her any ideas?
Tell everyone and post mudes. Pretend to be cool but then take pics and put it on her fb
>>16531408
Tell everyone she knows
I wish I could but i dont have her on fb nor do i know any of her friends
I've traveled the world but I didn't find it to be the amazing, life-changing, eye opening experience that has pushed me to a higher state of being that everyone makes it out to be.
What did I do wrong?
My theory is that you didn't drink enough, hang out with enough white people, have enough casual sex, take enough selfies in front of historic buildings, post about it enough on social media, or put up a gofundme for it.
Better luck next time, pleb
>>16531298
you romanticized travelling the world too much, living in country B is not necessarily better than living in your own country (unless if you are from a developing country)
how did you travel the world? quit your job and backpack? work in farms around the world? taught english in other countries?
>>16531323
I traveled for my job.
good morning /adv/! I'm an attention whore and aspiring lolcow. what do you think of my drunken rant?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29y2RnB60Dw
no one has any tips?
I'm thinking I should script my next one, random rambles made up on the fly when drunk can't really be used to deliver a coherent message. but it has at least got me a bit of attention
bamp
>tfw my threads rarely succeed
When I was still a young girl, I befriended a young girl when I was travelling in Canada and I kept in contact with her. In the pre-internet days, we wrote letters to each other. Nowadays, we communicate via Facebook and email. However, since she lives in the middle of nowhere in Canada, the internet access there is very poor and she is rarely online. I feel like we are distancing ourselves from each other and we just chat about very general stuff around once every 2-3 months.
However, we have the "routine" of mailing each other presents annually during birthdays and Christmases. The presents I mail in one occasion tend to cost around $20. It can sometimes even cost more. Mailing fees are expensive and I don't use a lot of the presents she sent me. Over time, this has become repetitive and we tend to send similar stuff each year - notebooks, bracelets, pens, key chains, etc.
I would like to become closer to my pen pal. What is the best way to do this? I am an introvert and over self conscious. Now that I am older and can probably survive overseas by myself for two weeks, I am thinking about visiting her (vice versa is hard as I live in a big city and we won't be able to accommodate her in our small apartment), but it seems a bit odd to suddenly say that I will drop by.
You again? Didn't get enough attention last time?
>>16531175
The question I ask is somewhat different this time
> I am thinking about visiting her (vice versa is hard as I live in a big city and we won't be able to accommodate her in our small apartment), but it seems a bit odd to suddenly say that I will drop by.
Should I just suggest this?
Go just go!
How do I find artistic people to be friends with me? I want a friend who'd share some, well preferably all, of my artistic hobbies, to some extent.
Somebody I could talk to about my ideas, and listen about theirs, discuss them, maybe make some projects together.
There's almost 2 millions of people in my city and the last time I had a friend I could exchange written stories or drawings, or play music with was in high school, and I lost contact with that guy when we graduated (there was a reason why I dropped contact with all the people from high school with no exceptions, although I regret doing so now).
I have a lot of acquintanes, buddies, some people I could even call friends, but it's always the same thing. We're all busy with our down-to-earth obligations, we only ever talk about classes, work, politics or girls, it gets boring. If I talk about my hobbies they aren't interested in it, if they talk about theirs - I'm not interested in it. We just aren't on the same wavelength to to such an extent.
Well, I guess I know 1-3 people who create some kind of art as a hobby, and seem to be on the same wavelength, but they're all significantly older than me and I doubt they'd have will and time to be closer friends with a kid like me. I want a friend at my age too but I barely have aquintaces close to my age in the first place.
Do you have any advice?
>>16531149
join fb-groups on the stuff you find interesting, go to underground parties, art galleries and jam sessions. Join some art course.
how old are you?
>>16531149
deviantart and pixiv
>>16531166
>how old are you
21
To be honest I don't like to go to meet-ups where there's a lot of people and they're all strangers if I don't have a friend to go with. I just feel awkward, it's hard to approach someone in a big group, and nobody will approach some fagit first.
Maybe the course is a good idea.
>>16531167
I wonder if it wouldn't be kind of awkward to just try to make friends with somebody on such a site.
so my doctor told me the craps I was getting were caused by anxity
he said my anxiety looked like PTSD, he said soldiers frequently presented the same way with the paranioa, jumping at noises and only seeking help when it caused them physical symptoms
people say I'm constantly in a state of panic, that I can't relax, that I'm always worrying about things
I think he suspects I was sexually abused, but I wasn't; I'm not sure why I'm so anxious.
the problem is that I think I NEED that kind of anxiety, I've been like this so long I'm not sure how to be any other way.
how would I get up out of bed in the morning, how could I work eight hours in my shitty job.
I feel like if I was less anxious I'd loose my wits, stop being able to stay on top of things, my life would become dysfunctional, it fills a need in my life.
tl;dr: what do you replace anxiety with
meditation
mindfulness
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dd6ktroFf8Q
jon kabat-zinn
yeah he married zinn's daughter and took her name .
http://marc.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=22
MARC
http://marc.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=107
mindful meditation has helped me , try it . what have you to lose?
>>16531118
>what do you replace anxiety with
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnLoToJVQH4
happiness
You sort of instruct your body that there is no need to pump chemicals into you as you are better able to maintain the panic mode while free for anxiety. Think of it like instead of going backwards on the acute state of awareness you've achieved you actually hone it further so that you understand that the anxiety is only needed one something does happen and that you are better kept safe by having a clear head to keep aware of your surroundings. Like, upgrading it.
What causes food cravings and what can I do to stop them?
I've been craving black olives like crazy all week. I've eaten three jars of them today and the thirst is sill dire.
Ew. Black olives? I've never met someone who ate three jars of something and still wanted more.
>>16531091
It's windy as fuck and pouring rain out there, I have no car and my shoes leak like hell, and I am still seriously contemplating getting up and walking two kilometres to the grocery store to get more.
And I've never even LIKED black olives before! I just thought "huh, I feel like trying if I like them now that I'm older" on tuesday and I've been fucking guzzling them since.
>>16531094
Why don't you snack on something else? Are you stoned?
Every girl I meet seems to think that's my job to prove myself to her, but she doesn't seem to even consider that she has to actually put some effort in as well!
Where do girls that have their own personality and bring something to a relationship hang out?
>>16531004
as counterintuitive as it seems, i've found several on tinder. by selecting for interesting settings and profiles rather than boobies (while not picking unatractive ones though!), by including risky information in my profile (like being a nihilist) and by asking personal questions.
you still have to be the man and all, but it's different from say partygurls in the club.
also actively invite her to bring something on the table, ask personal questions and get her involved. Girls sometimes also feel pushed into "that role" so they also need to feel safe to be more forward.
also remember that while you may want hot girls to come to you, it's a bit like asking for a golden toiletseat or like a girl wanting to have men waiting for her despite being fat.
>>16531017
I don't mind initiating and keeping things going but I just get bored if she's not bringing something into it as well.
So far I've only met 1 girl that was actually interesting and loved to talk about things. The rest just think all they need is tits.
But thanks for your advice I'll give that a shot!
>>16531026
yeah most girls are boring as fuck,hell most people are boring as fuck. that's why you only need one gf.
It's a combination of finding interesting ones and finding interesting things in one, like talking about what drives her to do stuff rather than the stuff itself. example: I couldn't care less about painting or drawing, but I do make music. those are different things, but we might be doing them for largely the same reason.
see...
Entertain my idea for minute here /b/,
My ex and I lived together since we were 18 and leaned on each other for success. I am 23 now. I had a decent job at one time but never really made over 20k per year and she was a camgirl and made about the same plus she got GI bill money from a relative. We move into an apartment with her brother and I convince her to quit camgirling and get a job. So she starts working at Walmart and a few months later gets a supervisory position making 13/hr full time which translates to ~24k per year. It is at this time that she does all these things to get me out of the apartment and tells me we are done and decides to completely erase me from her life and never talk to me again. It has been 6 months.
I have completely given up. I now, after all the life ruining tactic she has pulled on me, live with my mother again, and make less then 12k per year.
I want to kill myself because I know I will never have another relationship like that one if any at all. I have no friends and some kind of crazy mental illness that forces me to be scarily antisocial.
Now my idea is to Well Fargo SurePay her all of my remaining money 2,000 dollars at a time, because that is the max I can send her per day, for 10 days. Then kill myself.
Okay man, good of you to let us know. Now we all have closure, at least.
If I were you I would find something to dedicate my life to rather than wasting what was built though you. That would give you guidance and salvation.
>>16530964
like what
