Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2043. page
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So on thanksgiving a girl I went to high school with messages me out of the blue. We talked a little back than but haven't really talked since I graduated 7 years ago.
So we started talking and things just clicked. Next thing I know we're always texting, snap chatting, or talking on the phone. So after talking everyday for almost 2 weeks I aked her out on a date and she excitingly said yes.
Things seemed great. It seemed as if this may end up being something serious one day.
So we've been talking for a lil over 3 weeks now. So I texted her...
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Fast forward to tonight. We always talk on the phone or text before her or I go to bed. I couldn't talk since I was out with some friends celebrating my buddy coming home from the navy for the holidays. I only had two beers as I was the designated driver tonight.
So I texted her and still the one or two word answer bull shit. So I ask her if shes upset with me or if somethings wrong. What the hell is the elephant in the room.
She than drops a bomb shell on me. Tells me that she thinks we're rushing things and we're moving to quickly. And cancels...
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Tells me that with work, the holidays and other stuff she has a lot on her plate and wants to pause things and not rush.
Rush things? All we do is talk we haven't even had the chance to meet up and let things blossom. Everything seemed organic like when a relationship may begin. I never said I loved her aka scare her. Never was pushy. Never pushed anything sexual on her. Granted we had phone sex on night when she called me after she got drunk at her work Christmas party and was horney. And everything was fine the next day we even laughed and joked about it.
In...
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>>16572023
Shameless bump
>33 year old kissless virgin
>yesterday I hugged a girl so she'd take a selfie
>feels like greatest achievement of my life (and I have a master's degree)
>now I want more
wat do
Feels so bittersweet /adv/
How much do you want it?
The road you're looking at isn't easy, but it's possible
What do you look like ?
>>16572012
Literally the worst thing you could ever do.
I wish I never had mine. I've spent my life as a social outcast, and only the past 6 years I've turned it around.
For a short moment I felt accepted, and it feels strange, it felt nice, but I can't accept it, its too alien, it made me feel a bit sick.
Expose yourself slowly I'd say.
I remember watching a documentary of people who had spent 25+ years in jail.
The Fresh air gave them headaches, the food was so rich...
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I went to a private school in a second world country. All of my peers are studying abroad except for me and three other guys. One of the guys occasionally chat to me but I don't consider ourselves as particularly close (we rarely had classes together).
Recently he messaged me and asked me whether I want to hang out and talk. I don't think he is trying to ask me out. He probably just wants to meet someone from high school and since almost everyone is studying abroad he doesn't have much choice. I am not 100% entirely sure about his intentions though.
I do...
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Nah it'll be a clear invitation from you if you ask him out. Just bring up past conversation about him asking to meet and say that you know a good place to hangout at.
>>16572172
Oh ok. So I shouldn't worry about him misunderstanding that I have feelings for him when I don't?
>>16571985
Out of curiosity which country are you from?
What do I want out of life and how do I figure it out?
>>16571926
Procreation.
Finding out the proper vagina to put your sperm in and then raising your kids to be better persons than you.
This should be the meaning of life for every man.
>>16571926
control
take a look around
>>16571935
That is on my list. But what else would I do with my time?
RELATIONSHIP HELP - SEX RELATED
My boyfriend 22 and I 21 are living together. We've been together a little over a year and I'm studying whilst he is working. He works a lot and recently likes to relax by playing a game (not that I mind, just background information). We're both home quite a lot lately in the evening, but we both do our own thing.
We've been having sex around one time a week.
Obviously in the beginning of the relationship we did it a lot more often but still relatively low. He's said from the start that he doesn't...
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Also I'd like to add that I am quite confident. I have good hygiene and do take care of myself. I like fashion and always try to look my best.
He has also said, that he does feel attracted to me.
>>16571804
You seem pretty confident that he isn't cheating and that everything is going alright. As you mentioned, the sex is good when it does happen. Relationships are always a little rocky, it's normal to have your ups and downs. If you're pretty confident and you haven't seen any signs of disinterest in you then I think it might just be stress. What's his work?
>>16571823
Thanks so much for your answer - it's comforting!
I really hope it's just that. Like I said things have been rocky .. He too said he's not sure why this is - but I felt a little let down at all the negative advice that came up when I googled it.
>can only view women as sexual objects
what do I do senpaitachi
stop being autistic
had the same problem, no fap is the answer
>can only view women as sexual objects
Right. And the reason you came here is?
Gonna lose my virginity in a couple days. Any tips on preparing?
>>16571780
Masturbate beforehand
>>16571780
It kind of depends on how big he is, but you can do the following:
Get your ass clean (you don't have to do a full enema but you must make sure there won't be any poop disaster)
Ask him to use plenty of lube
Have a dildo ready so he can prepare your ass, especially if he's big
>>16571792
lmao shoulda clarified that I'm a guy. And I'm gonna fuck a girl
>be dating current bf
>he's 28, i'm 23
>it's been about 7 months since we've known each other
>tells me all the time "i can see this as something that's real and lasting"
>thought he was just being sweet/cute at first
>mfw i'm slowly starting to realize he's talking about marriage
his older brother (30 y/o) is already married. a lot...
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>>16571776
This is why they say age gaps aren't a good idea. You're at different points in your lives - he'll want to settle down and get married and have kids within a year or two, while you're probably still finishing off school or just getting started on your career.
As far as advice goes, I think this is something you need to talk to him about, not skirt around the issue forever. Let him know you're not ready and perhaps give him a timeframe of when you will be
>>16571779
>while you're probably still finishing off school or just getting started on your career
yep, this is exactly me... i haven't even gotten the chance to live on my own yet.
i'm also well-aware of how it's harder to get married off by the time you're in your late 20s/early 30s as a woman... so i realize i have a time limit too.
i guess i could talk to him, but the thing is, i think it's my personal issue; i can't help but think of...
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>>16571815
>i have a time limit too.
Well that's rubbish, people of all ages get married.
It sounds like you don't even want to get married. Is he aware of this? I still think you should talk to him, it'll help you get things sorted. It's not fair on him if he assumes you want the same things as he does, and it's not fair on you that this relationship is causing you this much stress.
Is it weird for grown siblings to periodically hug and say they love each other?
I (21) cuddle my little sister (17) a lot and my boyfriend says it weirds him out.
My 20 year old brother and I (23) hug a fair bit. My family in general is big on hugs
personally i dont ever say i love you to my siblings
nor do we cuddle
>>16571755
Idk OP. Could you give me a detailed description on how these nights usually go so i could give you a better answer?
I am 37 (although I look like I am in my mid 20s). Recently divourced with my husband. From what I get, finding another at this age decent person is virtually hopeless.
women play the dating game on easy mode
I'll stick it in your butt for a fee
>>16571668
No you shouldn't. There is someone out there right now who is wondering what it's like to meet someone like you.
How did you get a girlfriend/boyfriend /adv/?
I was asked out, I said yes, the end.
I made here laugh
I chatted with her about a common interest
I invited her to a event I was attending
She said yes
After said event I texted her casually
Made a agreement to attend another event together
>repeat 2-4 times
eventually there was a mutual agreement of dating.
> chat
> chat
> chat
> hug
> hug
> hug
> hug
> romantic hug
> kiss
> kiss
> kiss
> propose going steady
Addition info:
I am 29. Guy is 36 with 5 year old son. I get along with the kid. We probably will not have more kids.
Is dating a divorced guy really that "undesirable"? Is it possibly to live happily with a life like this? All I hear is how dating a divorced person with kids is "settling".
Depends on the ex. Where's she?
>>16571613
She lives in the same city in her own apartment.
>>16571623
So, he has custody?
>Anyway, do you see where this is going? You have to figure out how much extra hassle and baggage this kids will be, and weigh that against the value of the guy to you. We can't know all that, only you can.
Hello /adv/
I used to watch a lot of porn and fap at least twice a day (4 times a day in the weekend).
After I failed to keep it hard when going for my first sex experience, I realized I may have been addicted to porn and desensitized. I have reduced my fapping to once a week. But now I feel my sex drive is pretty low, I get some erections, but I can't get really excited when I flirt with a woman, I only get a semi. Is it normal? Am I being too nervous about it? Should I try to go to prostitutes to ease my apprehension?
Also, since I reduced my fapping...
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Bump
Halp
I'm no expert, I feel like I'm borderline porn addicted myself. Trying to cut it out as well.
Basically, you're brain is desensitized and needs time to readjust. Give it a bit of time and you will get turned on by minor stuff you didn't before.
Another thing is that looking at porn constantly and then getting a hardon in reaction to that is not your sex drive.
Your sex drive is a constant baseline. If it gets satisfied (or in your case glutted with too much) you won't notice it. But if it doesn't you'll end up getting distracted...
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>>16571742
What kind of signs should I be looking for to know when I'm cured?
Do you get a hardon when you see a hot girl on the street for example?
Are prostitutes going to help? I'm legitimately scared of working all my way with a gf only to find out I don't feel anything special about sex and she just leaves me for that.
How about this precum leaking? Sometimes I get lazy with the washing machine and I have to go commando, a precum stain on my crotch sure won't look too good...
I've been diagnosed and treated by a psychatrist for ADD for several years, but I would like to know if this is a typical treatment/relationship.
At the beginning, we were trying out different forms of medication and finally settled on dexamphetamine (which still has some side effects, but they aren't too bad). It's a legal requirement to go for sessions to get more scripts, but since then, all the sessions have felt like a waste of time.
The sessions typically start off with a quick re-cap of what we talked about the last time and how I'm doing...
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>>16571568
I missed an appointment with the psychatrist recently (had accomodation issues, so I had to find another place to stay REALLY quick). Spoke to him over the phone today and he was REALLY annoyed, he kept mentioning stuff like the contract we signed, a cancellation fee, that he wasn't interested in apologies, etc. He kept using phrases like "you knew what you were getting into when you signed it" and "it's part of your contract to pay me a cancellation fee if you miss an appointment".
I...
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>>16571571
Jesus christ. Wtf is this shit?
I live in Norway, but I don't see anyone anymore. I text when I need a new prescription. It was like that for about a year. Then I met him after a year and now I can't remember last time I met him.
But it might be differences because of country or whatever. Dunno.
>>16571571
Some psychiatrists are good people who actually care about their patients and prioritize your well-being. Some psychiatrists are assholes who really just want to wring money out of you and don't give a fuck about you. Go with your gut.
Is there anyone over 35 here?
If so, i have 2 questions.
Do you have any regrets in life?
Do you have any advice for a very intelligent yet lazy 23 year old who hasn't accomplished anything in his life?
>>16571531
>Do you have any advice for a very intelligent yet lazy 23 year old who hasn't accomplished anything in his life?
Get your shit together. You don't have much time.
>>16571531
I'm 31 for what it's worth
I regret that I've only had one girlfriend. I've only had sex with one pussy, and I've ever only lived with her. I have nothing to compare to so I'm happy, but I always wonder what other girls are like.
Asside from not fucking around, literaly, I also regret that it took me so long to understand how to be a man. I had no fatherfigure in greater part of life.
1. Yes, i should have gone for the older one.
2. Get car licence, dare yourself, read that book thats on your mind, fuckit go ask that girl your like for a coffee, be helpfull and for gods sake, relax.
