Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1942. page
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My girlfriend is from a rich family and it makes me really insecure.
I'm starting a great career but being around them makes me feel like I'm still that kid with gaping holes in his shoes and no heat.
Are these feelings normal?
Is the discrepancy really that noticeable or something? I can get that you would be a bit insecure, but why does it bother you that much?
Is she or any of her family members condescending in any way?
>>16609961
I never show my negative emotions
Her family is nice, but her dad seems like he sees me as a wandering dog
You aren't alone OP,pretty much all of my girlfriends have been from wealthier families than me,and yeah,sometimes you'll get those feelings,but asnlong as they don't hold I over your head and act respectable,then it's something that should come to pass. Money isn't everything.
Any of you had a cyst from ingrown hair in pubic area? How to get rid of it?
Wait until it's large-ish enough and make a little cut. A LITTLE cut.
Then remove the ingrown hair, rub some alcohol and you're done.
>>16609902
I have it since like a year, it is kinda big, i didnt care because i was a fat fuck with no perspectives of getting laid. I also dont know the exact location of the hair. Should i aim to the middle?
>>16609912
How do you know it's a cyst and not a boil caused by your poor diet?
Should I hit on my friend's roommate?
A couple weeks ago, I hooked up with a girl I had previously had an affair with. We were talking pretty much everyday until I found out that she was still with her longtime boyfriend.
I'm going to her apartment this week to bake blackberry cobbler, and am wondering if it'd be prudent to slightly hit on her roommate.
The roommate studies film. I'm an editor. Maybe it's not such a bad move. Is it mean?
This is a whole lot.
Why not? Why should you care what your friend thinks? She cheated on her boyfriend with you, she doesn't really get to judge the way you conduct your own love life
If you value your friendship you should ask her first if it's ok.
>>16609859
Look, unless you're pursuing anything inherently romantic, who cares who you flirt with or Fuck. Do what you want.
So here's the thing, I was hanging out with this 18yo girl for 5 months, it's was really nice, but it turned into a kind of "Tom &Jerry relationship" when a gay friend of ours suddenly became interested in her (bizarre, ikr). And now she's fuckin' enchanted by him ( even though sometimes we still kiss/make out) . What should I do ? Should I let them be ? I really like this girl, but It's so messed up...
you should become gay to balance the situation
Attraction is complicated. Enjoy the parts of the relationship you can enjoy for now (makeouts I guess) but don't let it stop you from looking elsewhere.
I don't think so mate...
Been over 2 months since I talked to her. We both liked each other but I took to long to make a move and also embarrased myself by drunk dialling.
Should I try and reconnect with her?
For real, no replies
Why not? I'd do it before too much time passes and it gets weird. Play off any awkwardness and just be cool about it.
>>16609843
Tell us about the drunk dialing.
I need help when it comes to girls being attracted to me. What should you do if you know for a fact that a girl is flirting or may be attracted to you?
It seems like some girls find me attractive but I always fuck it up by being oblivious or acting scared/nervous. This is a reoccurring problem that I have. I'm referring to girls that I don't know personally. Girls who are only attracted to my appearance because I am semi fit.
Ask her if she wants to go do something.
See a movie, walk around the park, play video games, visit the animal shelter, whatever.
This will buy you time together to stop acting nervous.
What's your end game? Do you want to make out or get a girlfriend or just stop having nerves or what?
>>16609829
The the end goal is a girlfriend. I don't enjoy sex with condoms very much so one night stands don't appeal to me. and I would rather not catch a venereal disease from making out with random girls.
>>16609878
Even if you have a girlfriend that doesn't mean you can stop using a condom.
Is this how people think? Really?
No wonder there is so much teen pregnancy.
Hi,
My girlfriend has feelings for another guy but she still loves me...
We've been crying our souls out to eachother for a couple of days now...I love her with all my soul and don't want to break up with her...She says she could not cheat on me because I am the greatest thing that happened to her...I really need some help...What should I do? Pic unrelated...
she's just afraid of being alone, that's why she says she still loves you
deep down she wants the other guy, she just haven't moved on because she doesn't think it's safe to do it right now
This
>>16609825
The relationship is over.
Seperate for now. A couple days. Tell her it's hard to be with her when she has feeling for someone else.
She will either
A.) miss you the whole time and come back
B.) go sleep with the other guy and stay with him
C.) go sleep with the other guy and get cum'd & dump'd, then come crying back to you
A is acceptable. B is unfortunate for you but also okay. C is the most fucked up and will lead to 2-4 years of hot tears and arguments about it before you both get over it (if you want her back and can still stand each other's company.)
I'm about to turn 22.
How do I stop feeling like I'm too old and that my life should have ended by now?
I never made plans past this point. I never thought I'd make it this far. I always figured I'd man up and kill myself before I reach 21.
Realize you still have an infinite number of things you could possibly do with the rest of your life. There is so much to do and experience I don't know why anyone would want to kill themselves when that is the death of potential.
>>16609805
Like what?
I'm too old to start anything.
>>16609811
Like anything you want. Are you dumb?
How do you guys get over someone that literally saved you from a doomed existence? I know these kind of stories have been endlessly asked here but I just...can't. I am aware that there are plenty of fish in the sea but she was my type of woman: mature, a bit shy/reserved, beautiful but not amazing (7-8/10), has great values, good job, no tattoos or piercings...
I am a 22 y/o male and I was really into a 27 y/o female. 2 years ago I started going to a track and field club in order to change myself (boderline NEET, no friends, no female interaction...). At first, I just wanted to train but eventually grew closer to this girl and she asked me what do I do in life? I froze for a second and she said I look like a firefighter and this is where she gave me purpose.
Since I met her, everything about me changed:
>accepted into the firefighter academy
>new haircut
>new clothes
>less shy than before
>bought my dream car
>started to read the redpill
I have tried to make things work with her but I was friendzoned long ago. I made a move on her in August and said she views me as a 2nd degree friend that I was funny, smart and kind but she just can't open herself about other subjects. She is sorry that she induced me in error and says that the reason I always felt like a stranger to her is that she still has her heart broken by her previous relationship (she is literally the definition of alpha widow) and she tries to forget about it. I tried to talk to her like nothing happened a month later but her responses were short and dry. It has been 2 months since I have talked to her and I don't think she will ever re-initiates the conversation.
>>16609787
I looked up what her ex looked like and I get it now:
>guy is tall
>co-founder of a big bicycle start up in my city (that also explains this girl's love for bicycles)
>lives in a upper middle class apartment (she always told me she sought independence...)
>seems to have a lot of friends and pretty popular
I never stood a chance against him. But in someway, I owe everything I have achieved because of her...and I can't let her go. I want to reconnect with her but I don't think there is a way. I am already abysmal with women and even though I have tremendously improved, it's still not enough.
What do now?
>>16609790
shes out of your league bud. leave her be, pursing her longer is just creepy. treasure the memories you have of her and be grateful for those. you dont need any more than that
>>16609809
actually, let me rephrase. you dont deserve more than that. any fgt that uses the term "alpha widow" unironically is pretty much a giant douche.
Alright So recently I've kinda found out what mortality is ( I knew what it is, But it's coming into perspective) and how I could die at any moment. So Obviously I want to stay alive, but also have fun with my life and take risks, Is there any way I can mic the two together?
>>16609738
The two are already entwined. Logic is whether you do it or not. Is up to you.
>>16609738
start doing more shit that brings you joy and happiness. stop doing shit that is pointless drudgery that makes you miserable.
take risks.
network.
be active.
be present in the NOW.
If you could die at anytime the only logical way to live your life is to make the absolute most of it that you can. It might be our only chance to live, so to live it paralyzed by inaction is a waste of all the possibilities.
How do you make your facial expression look less sad and grim. My natural resting face always looks depressed. Is there anyway to change that? I try to smile sometimes but it feels so uncomfortable.
>>16609723
because you aren't used to it.
do it more.
google some "emotional intelligence face tests" and see for yourself
http://socialintelligence.labinthewild.org/mite/ (you dont have to put anything in, just keep clicking next)
>meet girl while my then-relationship was falling apart, use her as emotional escape
>year later, friend confesses she's in love with me
>literally find her attractive one day and repulsive the next, it changes constantly
>we have good chemistry
>can't tell if it's because we genuinely do or if I'm just more confident around her because I've always known she was attracted to me
>on days I'm repulsed, I find it so bad that I'd be embarrassed to be seen in public dating her
>but, haven't had any romantic prospects in a very long time
I really can't sort these feelings out. Does it sound like I'm attracted, or a thirsty man seeing a desert mirage?
>>16609711
Thirst.
step outside of yourself and observe from an anon point of view
you aren't attracted to her.
you're already repulsed by being seen in public with her.
how's that going to play out a year into dating?
how's it going to crush this awesome person when you inevitably dump them because you're turned off by their appearance?
Stay friends.
Or, if you're that thirsty, fuck her and tell her you really dont want to date right now. That way you've put it out there, and if she decides to just keep banging, then you don't have to worry about shit
NOT. LOVE.
This is my inner thigh. Does that look like herpes to you guys? I'm pretty worried and the worst part is, I had sex with a girl last night who I really care for without mentioning it.
no, you have a yeast infection.
>>16609719
Seems improbable
I'm really fucking bored right now. Every sunday I have off and I usually just clean up the house. When I'm done with that though, I pretty much just browse 4chan all night until bedtime.
I like to draw, play guitar, and code, but i just cant be bothered doing them. I'm not exceptionally good at any of them, but I feel like even if I do these, I waste my time. But even so, I'm wasting time by doing nothing.
anyone else feel like this?
I'm taking anti-depressants and everyone said that they have been working, but I still don't see it.
4 words=
YOU. NEED. A. LOVER.
>>16609676
I feel it.
I'm decent at some things and should definitely fill my time with more productive shit.
It's a habitual rut, honestly.
You get drawn into doing the easy, brainless, nothing for hours and hours and hours, and then you go to bed going "Fuck I wasted all that time".
You need to develop more productive routines. You clean every Sunday, so that's a good start. Fuck around with guitar, code, or drawing for at least a couple hours. Commit to it. Mix it up if you get bored, but commit to at least a couple hours of nurturing these (could-be) talents.
Then, commit an hour to learning something new or doing something new. Maybe working out... learning a different type of code, learning how to play a different style of music, etc.
If you can do that for a couple weeks, it will become routine, just like your cleaning.
There is simply nothing on 4chan (or facebook, or insta, etc) that is going to be beneficial to you. Unless you use them as marketing tools for a business or something...
>>16609788
lol no.
dumb
You need to get out of your own little self-created bubble. Get out of the house. Exercise. Be with people. You're stuck in your own head and you're comfortable there and making excuses to justify your stagnation.
Get out of your comfort zone, OP. LIVE YOUR LIFE WHILE YOU HAVE IT!
I'm confident I have Misophonia, and I could just kill myself or others when I hear someone smack, crunch, chew, or slurp their food. Also, the sound of silverware clinging to a plate/bowl infuriates me. Right now, my father is completely on the other side OF THE HOUSE and I can hear him eating, and I am in tears. Actual, real tears. I am so upset and angry and anxious. It's the dumbest thing ever, but it's so real that I can't even describe it.
Anyone else suffer with this bullshit? Any cures? Any remedies? Any ways to tolerate these noises? I feel like I'm going to either spontaneously combust or kill myself.
Earplugs?
>>16609658
Feels like a bandaid to the problem. I'm listening to music right now with headphones on, and it's helping drown out the noise, but just knowing that when I take them off and he's still eating, I will hear him, and it sucks.
I normally do carry earplugs around, though. Like to the movies or restaurants. It helps but it's a sad life.
>>16609648
I have had the same thing for about 20 years, but I never knew there was a name for it til a couple years ago. And I'm glad I didn't because otherwise I probably would have just waved my diagnosis around in people's face like an autistic fuck and never tried to do anything about it. As it is, I was able to learn to block out *some* noise to *some* extent. I'm a lot better at blocking out machine noises and shit. People talking is still a noise that I have a terrible time with though, same with people sniffling. I just want to shove a box of kleenex at them.
Here's what I'd do:
Look up some relaxation techniques online - deep breathing, visualising a happy place, whatever works for you. Try several of them and see which ones seem to help. When someone's making noise, make a conscious effort to relax. Just try it for a minute or two, and then put in the earplugs. Basically the idea is to gradually increase your tolerance and to get yourself in the habit of going into relaxation mode when the noises happen. This is not a miracle cure, and it may take a few months or years, but it will help. And if you went to a therapist or a doc, their treatment recommendation would probably be pretty close to that.
Also do whatever you can to work towards moving out, so you can have more control over your environment. Whether it's working on completing school, looking for jobs so you can save up for an apartment, whatever - it makes it easier to tolerate annoying shit if you're actively working towards getting rid of it/getting away from it.
