Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1815. page
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So /adv/ i want to move away and cut off all ties to any kind of interaction i have with people. I want to leave without telling my family, boyfriend, etc. Part of me wants to cut off any connection i have with my family. Should i feel ashamed for this? For wanting to disappear without telling anyone? How could i stop feeling this way?
Ashamed? No.
>>16664125
These people have never done anything wrong to me but yet i still want to just push everyone away. I feel bad about thinking this way
>>16664131
It's your life. Do what you want.
If nothing else, you could just cut ties until you get to where you want to be. I'm sure your family and friends would like to hear from you in the future.
I'm 6inches and 5'9 with Scandinavian features and have never had a girlfriend. I'm 18 and feel terrible.
Pictures
>>16663696
What? Dude that sounds pretty good.
5'9 Blasian with 9/10 gf here.
Stop feeling like shit and your luck will turn around.
>>16663696
>6inches
>5'9
nothing special but maybe you'll find some hambeast/uggy
How do you learn to tolerate fighting? I have zero tolerance for conflict of any kind. If someone disagrees with me, does something I don't like or goes against previously agreed rules, and continues to do so after I already asked once nicely, I always just assume that they are hell-bent of doing that the way they're doing forever and just abandon the whole thing.
I cut people out of my life with what others apparently perceive as zero warning on a semi-regular basis. The mere concept of yelling at people until they do what you want them to do makes just as...
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So in your mind, it's either "ask kindly" or "yell at people"? Are you a woman?
>>16663563
If you think WOMEN are the ones who don't fight, you're living in a quite different world than I do.
If I share my opinion about a matter, and my opinion is ignored, I believe it's quite logical to conclude that my opinion is not considered valuable. If someone doesn't respect me, they don't respect me. No amount of yelling at them would make them enjoy and value my presence more, so there is no reason to try.
>>16663558
Hey op, I'm in a similar situation as you. I don't really have any /adv/ to provide, really, but I completely sympathize with you. My solution is cutting contact with these people (namely my parents, I don't really have friends that are like this), but I can't do that until I get my stuff out of their place (I know it sounds easy but I can't right now due to my job requiring travel). I don't have the time to waste on adults who argue like children who never developed self control. Its...
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What's the normal way that people get a boyfriend?
I know how to get sex in a bar or something, but actual dates and someone liking me back, I don't know
What's the normal way?
I want to do it the normal way I don't want my first date to be from online dating, that would be sad
I'm 24 and female btw.
>>16663246
You're more than happy to get pounded after meeting up at a bar, but meeting someone online is sad?
>>16663255
Being a virgin at 23 is sadder than being pounded by someone from a bar. Of course I would love to have lost it to a boyfriend, but I got too tired of waiting.
>>16663266
But you didn't ask about losing your virginity, you asked about starting a relationship. Get over the stigma of online dating, or just become the local bar jizz jar.
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.
Avoid asking these common questions:
>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get...
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A friend's birthday is coming up soon, and she's very excited for it. Still, I shouldn't bother getting her something if she doesn't bother inviting me to do something that day, right? As things are now, I likely won't see her.
For a while I had a pretty good idea for a gift I know she'd love, but I doubt she'd do the same for me and I don't know if I should.
would you rather walk into an elevator where someone farted inside or be the person that everyone knew farted inside the elevator?
>>16658909
Definitely walk in to someone else's
How do you deal with people calling you pretentious? Any time I see a movie with my brother or he listens to the music I like he writes me off as pretentious. It really irritates me because I try to discuss these things afterwards but he keeps attacking my character instead of my arguments.
Also, my tastes in music and film have been developed over a long time thinking critically of what works for me and what doesn't. To have them dismissed as nothing but a superiority complex aggravates me.
>because I try to discuss these things afterwards
You stop doing that.
>>16664397
I mean it's not just me that starts the discussion. It's a common thing to do after you watch a movie with someone.
Should I just give simple answers or tell him what I think he wants to hear. That doesn't seem too honest or helpful.
Or should I just ignore it completely and tell him that it seems he never wants to discuss things seriously.
>>16664397
This.
If he's gonna call you pretentious for wanting a discussion, don't discuss shit with him.
If you think your opinions are particularly "complete" or "cultured" or god forbid "rich" then you just might be pretentious and might need to humble yourself.
Every couple of years I ask this
Would it be possible to get a boyfriend with a face like this? Early twenties btw
Disfigured people get boyfriends. It's about more than looks.
>>16664175
It's unlikely that they get boyfriends.
>>16664182
Yeah they do. It's ll about the personality and settling.
My parents won't let me go to the college I want to go to. I want to go out of state to be close to my girlfriend who went out of state. My mother thinks I'm going to be too busy "socializing". I have enough money to go to this school and they have the major I want and its honestly not a bad school. The think is my parents have a college fund set up for me and they're not giving me the money to go to this school because they want me to stay in state. What do I do /adv/ Im going fucking crazy
>I have enough money
Then go?
>>16663959
It's basically in one of my parents funds so I cant access it without their permission
Does your mother not understand that socializing is part of going to college? You don't go there just to earn a degree, even if that's the main goal. You also go to college to learn how to function as an adult, to learn how to take care of yourself and learn how to deal with other people and, yes, socialize.
>drink at friends place with gf
>3am, im tired say im going to bed ask gf when shes coming she says soon
>7am, wake up and see gf on couch with another guy sitting really close to each other, both with separate blankets,
>speaking to him very happy like almost flirtatious, they are look at his phone
>approach subtly and ask wtf is going on, why shes been here with our friends house mate all night?
>say...
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she had a threesome with that guy and your other housemate.
>>16663621
I think there is no way she didn't do something. Girls will lie and lie even if what you're calling them out on is obvious.
>>16663621
kek holy shit she tired to cuck you. were none of them your friends. if not thats pretty bro tier of them not to lie to you. Honestly the way the should have played out is they gang bang her. You ask what happened. They all lie and say nothing. You continue to get cucked until shes pregnant with someone elses child.
You got lucky.
So i eventually found a girl online who wants to date me.
Problem is, she has no job and lives with her mom in a city 4 hours away by train.
Should i pay for her train tickets to come see me at my place?
Don't be a fool.
Why does she have no job? Inbetween work? Or is she like one of those standard MMO girls that avoid work because of "anxiety"
>>16663499
She was studying to become a dental hygienist but dropped out.
Now she was about to start some labor market program, but skipped because she broke her leg.
I dunno, maybe she's bullshitting me.. or maybe i can just pay and get laid. I was hoping for the later.
About 2 months ago I asked out a girl that I like. She told me that she had just got out of a relationship, so I didn't pursue it further.
Now, I'm aware that this could have just been a "soft" rejection (although I'm fairly certain it's not an outright lie), but it would tear me up to not get a final answer.
My question is: Is it too soon to try again now? Would it come off as desperate/rude? And if I were to try again, how should I go about doing so?
I wouldn't say it's too soon. Just casually bring it up. "hey, how about dinner? Or maybe a drink?" just don't make it a hard date. The more casual, the better.
Depends on how often you talk etc.
>>16663212
I only talk to her at uni.
Last semester we talked quite often in classes, but if I want to talk to her this semester, I'll probably have to find an opportunity to catch her as she's leaving lectures.
I've only recently discovered the joys(lolwut) of 4chan, but i'm encountering a serious problem.
I just can't understand what the fuck is going on.
i mean, ive read the rules , both of 4chan and the internet, and the answer is simple: "LURK MOAR", but i just cant understand the memes and inside jokes.
Help a newfag please!!!
use le meme arrows lots
>>16663177
meme arrows? whats that?
Read encyclopedia dramatica or know your meme to understand some of the inside jokes and references
My boyfriend sometimes jokingly (I think) says that he'll kill guys interested in me e.g I told him once a guy asked me out (I rejected him though) and he said "I'll kill him" and another time when I jokingly said some sweet things and after that I said "lol whoops wrong person" and then he said in all caps "WTF WHAT ILL KILL HIM TELL ME WHO THAT GUY IS". He has a history of girls cheating on him. Is this a red flag or could he just be fucking around? He's a really sweet and affectionate guy, not clingy though.
Is he 14?
it's just a prank
So are you just afraid of talking to him normally or are you actually afraid of him murdering a person you kind of want to fuck at the moment?
Some of my ex-high school teachers and books I've seen (pic related) encourage people to pursue their passions as careers. The books use examples of how this and that person became famous because he pursued his passion. Really, these authors are just cherry-picking for examples - many people who pursued their passions ended up broke. These authors might as well talk about how X won the lottery because that's how unlikely it is.
These people and books also ignore the fact that all jobs are stressful in their own ways and most people end up hating their jobs even...
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>>16659241
Having the passion for certain things definitely motivates people to go the extra mile to succeed. However, the thing those books fail to address is that one has to be realistic about how far one's dream can go and be prepared to take multiple detours. But of course, the people who buy those self-improvement books want the easy, quick way out rather than, you know, trying hard and working within one's limits to build his or her life.
I believe you do need to follow your passion, but the catch is that you most likely won't know what that passion is until later on. When an 18 year old kid says they want to do music or whatever, that may be their passion right then, but at 28 there's a good chance their true life calling passion is something else. It took them maturing and getting life experience to figure out what they need and want to do.
If you can't decide what's right for you, get some work experience, live a little , meet a lot of people, form a lot of relationships. In time...
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>>16659251
Exactly! These people and books are just propagating bullshit as people's interests change over time and do not stay the same.
And really, all jobs are monotonous. It's not like I have anything else to say.
tl;dr How to not be a bitter cunt?
Dating this dude- he's fun and weird and we get along and laugh a lot. I think he's going through a reinvention phase- Taking cave exploration, kick boxing, intermural sports, music lessons, etc. For some reason this shit annoys me, and I can't put my finger on it. I don't really have any real interests. I love to listen to audiobooks and I am super into standup comedy. Love my job and friends and coworkers. But I don't do "activites." My first instinct is to shit on all of it and roll my eyes, and...
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If that's a reinvention phase then I've been "reinventing" for the last 10 years or so. The core of my lifestyle is to build a list of "been there, done that, got the t-shirt." Novelty is amazing value for little investment.
To be frank I'm not sure your feelings are even worth analyzing. Does it matter that you figure out why you're bitter, as long as you're able to shut the fuck up and just try to keep up with his lifestyle for a change?
>>16664338
Well it'll still bother me- I basically want to figure out why so I stop being annoyed for a completely stupid reason.
I'm not a been there, done that kind of person. I'll try something new, but it's not a burning desire to fulfill these random activities. Maybe I'm just too easily content.
Maybe you feel like he's trying too hard to be original, and that can get annoying, kinda like being around attention-whorey behaviour.
The male equivalent of manic pixie dream girl-syndrome, idk
