That's not a thing, unless you're talking about hiring a hooker. You can have the best wingman in the world, but if you can't seal the deal yourself, then you're not going to get laid.

I can't believe you actually thought having friends would get you laid.

>>16915943
If they can't make it happen them selves then they can at least teach me how

>>16916225
so ask them. "hey chad I need some advice. you're good with the ladies, can you help me out?" if they're actually your friends then they'll be happy to help you out. if not, ditch them.

Definitely not sexy.
>Crooked teeth
>acne on my face and back
>always greasy hair no matter if I shampoo them everyday or every few days
>super hairy legs, ass and pubic area
>skinnyfat
>hair around nipples
>pale af
>one eye is higher on my face than the other one
>patchy facial hair
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>>16914876
So are you a guy or girl? That's relevant to stuff like patchy facial hair or hairy nipples.

The greasy hair isn't really that noticeable, and you probably just need to find the right shampoo.
The hair you can deal with.
The pale is good if you're F
The skinnyfat you can deal with, although it's harder

how old are you?

>>16914883
22 year old dude, believe me I went through like tons of different shampoo brands.

I'm a white male, and I'll bang you sight unseen.

>>16910726
your problem may be the fact that most people on 4chan have very little understanding of the world beyond memes.

I'm white. I dated a 8/10 waaaay to hot for me Ethiopian girl in highschool. Shit was so cash.

Anyway you're probably fine and should stop listening to people online. 99% of it is bullshit

>>16910739
Not all of it is bullshit. Society and culture bends the way we see things.

thanks OP now i'm wet

>>16920449
I know I'm extremely submissive in bed.

>>16920449

you can have my current girlfriend

I thought she was a prude before we fucked but dayum she likes to get spanked, scratched, whipped, tied down and fucked until everything's slick from sweat and pussy juice - the average session lasts about 3-4 hours and if it didn't leave a mark it didn't count.

on the other hand I fucked a slut and she was super exclusively vanilla in bed

what I want is a dominant one, or a switch even, but they're hard to find.

>>16910863
Guys have the same issue about the size of their dick.

Would you date a guy with a small dick?

At least they're not saggy like mine.

>>16910870
Seconding this question. Come on, OP, answer.

>>16924340
Are you a part of her life? Should you be? That's her business, and I'd actually be more inclined to NOT get involved with her if she's had TWO ABORTIONS since you were with her.

What could you possibly get out of someone who's done that twice? Leave her be and find someone worth your time, if she wanted you to talk to I'm sure she'd talk to you.

If you want to, go ahead. A little compassion never hurts in life.

Just don't do it if you think you'll get sucked back in.

You're broken up for a reason.

>ex had two abortions since being with me
>(not mine BTW)

So she cheated on you twice while you were together? And you want to start talking to her again? Holy shit, stop being a cuck.

You don't. Move on to another girl.

>>16923858
>How bad is this and how do I recover
you done goofed, faggot

recovery is impossible

Serves you right normalfag

>>16923819
You're the fag

Please leave

Friend #1 is a hypochondriac and an idiot
Friend #2 is lame

Find Friend #3. As long as they have a job and aren't an asshole they'll eat stuff.

>>16923827
What third world nation do you live in where you haven't learned about cross contamination?

First of all you don't know if he actually killed himself, maybe he's been busy with life and stopped going online so much. Don't jump to conclusions without proof.

Maybe you should have been more direct instead of just blocking him and told him why you didn't want to speak anymore, however I wouldn't say it's your fault if he did kill himself.

Most people who are suicidal have other stuff going on too and a lot of factors that contribute to the final act. If he couldn't move on after a year that's his fault - not yours...
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>>16923811
Nice going, OP. You fucked up, poor guy needed some normal fucking attention. He didn't ask for nudes or love. Just a fucking friend and you couldn't even be human and honest with him. He's in a better place knowing you're not there.

>>16923828
We have treads about dudes who wanna kill themselves because some girl dumped them almost every day on here. Dude's most likely dead if no one has heard from him and he hasn't been online in over a month.

>>16923555
Just start having sex with your mom

>>16923567
what? I mean human relationships with your friends and family for gods sake, and I'm asexual

>>16923577
>asexual

back to tumblr you go

It would be cool if you could get the girl the stuff she needs and not give money to the mother at all. The mother has hid this from you to suck the money out of you knowing she wouldn't get shit if you knew she cheated. Don't hide the fact that you know what you know. Tell the woman you love that child and will provide for her but you will not be giving the mother her shopping money. At least, this is what I would do if I was able to take care of another person.

Tell all family members and friends casually over time, don't seem spiteful. Who knows maybe a lot of people know already. Does she know you know? I can't believe you still want to be with her. You can't really trash her in front of the kid but maybe tell you know in the most insulting way possible and in day to day conversation try and slip in phrases like "maybe it's someone else's" or "I was going to tell you in two years".

>>16923193
She's not really sucking money out of me, we've got a joint account that we use for paying for my daughter. I pay into it monthly and she's occasionally paid into it when she's earned some money. I can also see the transactions and its all been things that she's bought for her.

>>16923200
No one knows that I know, I only found out a few weeks ago.

>>16922916
you probably should be worried, after a girl undergoes that transformation its super likely that she leaves you for somebody better and fitter

>>16922924

>better
>fitter

Not sure they're the same thing. Essentially, I don't know whether I should tell her straight up that I don't find it attractive at all, or subtly imply it over time.

>>16922916
The likelihood that she will get to that point is slim to none. You have to cut so much body fat as a woman to have visible abs, many women don't bother when they notice how long of a road it actually is and get more realistic with their goals.
Honestly just be supportive and give your honest opinion when she asks you if the women in the pics look hot or more attractive than her.
Everyone has an "unhealthy body image", at least hers is fitness related and not anorexia related. Hopefully anyway.

Because men are stronger and can use more force. Also women get shocked and don't know what to do while men usually have it all planned.

The least you could do is give her mental support and get over it together

>>16922770
Is it even possible to get over something so traumatic

I'm almost at a point where I don't know if I can perform sexually. I don't know if I'll ever be the same

>>16922737
My dog passed away fairly recently to some sort of hearth disease, but it didn't shake me all that badly because I was somewhat prepared for it.

All you can really do is make the most of it and spend whatever time you can playing, petting and taking care of him. That way you'll regret less about not being able to spend enough time with him and have some sweet memories of him for the rest of your life. Dogs really love their owners don't let him suffer these times alone.

>>16922765
I can get a week off work, Im thinking just to take him places, along the east coast, have bbq's on the beach, swim with him a bit, like when he was a pup..

I was thinking on where to bury him, but I can't bring myself to organizing it.

Prepare yourself. You have to be the adult. You want what's best for him and sometimes that means we put pets down (when resources are exhausted and they are in excruciating pain). Great idea to go have fun and make some excellent memories.

You don't have to bury him. Can do cremation then scatter or keep ashes.

Good luck, OP. Rainbow bridge and all that.

>>16922605
Meh, she might even be bi - more chance for a threesome mate :D

>>16922616
I like her in a long term relationship way, I want to be her boyfriend not just have sex

>>16922605
True lesbians don't exist. If you dick her well enough she'll go back to normal.